When we're frustrated at our kids, we tend to move with haste. Everything feels like an emergency that needs to be handled immediately.

I know it sounds almost too simple to be effective, but talking out loud can help you slow down.

Taking time to label your emotions, talk through what's happening in the moment and how it's impacting you can have such a powerful impact.

Doing this teaching your child:

✔Intense emotions are normal

✔How to handle intense feelings in the moment in healthy ways

✔Feelings aren't good or bad. They just are. It's what we do in response to our intense feelings that matters.

✔Feelings come and go

In this video, I'll share exactly what to say in the moment when you're feeling frustrated in front of your kids.

JOIN THE FREE 5 DAY MINDFUL MAMA CHALLENGE for greater self-awareness, patience, and presence! ➡ http://www.themompsychologist.com/challenge

Let's face it. We all need breaks from our kids. It's impossible to be "ON" 24/7 as parents. Trying to be ON all the time leads to us yelling, losing our cool and doing and saying these we later regret. That's why I think it's so important for us parents to regularly take breaks from our kids. This truly is an excellent skill to model for kids. They'll learn this from seeing us do this over and over again. Ideally, our kids will come to expect this from us and even take their own breaks when needed. Think of parenting as a marathon, not a sprint. Every day, we're running a marathon and we will need periods of rest and mental breaks to get back in the race. In this week's episode, I break down how to tell your kids you need a break, step by step! I also share troubleshooting advice when they get upset by our need for a break and how to take breaks when with infants and young toddlers. Take my free 2-min quiz: What's Your Parenting Style?http://www.themompsychologist.com/quiz

Figuring out how to redirect behavior and increase your child's cooperation can feel tricky in the moment. We know that our language is important but it's easy to feel flustered and fall back on old habits and say and do things we hate, like yelling, punishing, and dishing out empty threats. Ideally speaking, it's important to think ahead on how we want to show up in the moment and what we want to say so that we can show up in the ways we want most. In general you want to: ✔Provide information on why you want to do something different ✔Give them an alternative to try in the moment ✔Make a plan for when they can get their need/want met ✔Let them know of the consequence if the behavior continues ✔Choose clear language that directly sets expectations for behavior In this week's video, I break down each point and provide examples and phrases to try in the moment. This will help you feel more prepared for how to handle difficult parenting moments. Take my free 2-min quiz: What's Your Parenting Style?http://www.themompsychologist.com/quiz

Transitioning out of naps can feel tricky to navigate. ❓At what age do kids drop naps for good? ❓What to do their naps start to interfere with bedtime? ❓What to do if they resist staying in their room during their usual nap time? It's tricky, partly because every child's sleep needs and routine are different. In general, I recommend keeping naps for as long as possible (as long as it's not interfering with bedtime sleep). And when they stop napping (or naps stop being helpful), quiet time can be a great alternative to try. During quiet time, kids engage in play and other activities by themselves. Their area is quiet and away from stimulation. They may even still have their sound machine on and the room can be dim. They're not interacting with anyone else or on their screens. Why is quiet time important? Everyone (including our kids) needs time during the day to rest and recharge. We are more likely to get irritable and overstimulated if we're around people all day and don't have time to ourselves. This is also an important skill to learn (The art of being alone) and this time alone encourages creativity, innovation, and self-reflection. In this episode, I share: ✅How to know when it's time to shift from naps to quiet time ✅How long quiet time should be ✅What activities are best for quiet time ✅How to implement quiet time if you live in a small house and/or your kids share a room ✅How to respond if/when your child resists quiet time and leaves the room QUIET TIME ESSENTIALS (AMAZON AFFILIATE LINKS): https://a.co/3PWEcVL Don’t forget to check out my free discipline workshop, “How to Get Your Child to Listen Without Yelling” - www.themompsychologist.com/workshop

Undergoing major life transitions like starting a new grade, moving to a new home, or welcoming a new sibling can be really stressful for kids.

Common signs of stress in kids include tantrums, regression (including sleep and potty training), body complaints (stomachaches, headaches, etc), general anxiety and worry, anger, crying, separation anxiety, and/or new or recurring fears.

In this week's episode, I share:

✅How to start the conversation with your kids about their stressful experience(s)

✅How to help your child problem solve and cope better with stress

✅Several other practical tips for stress management for kids.

Join the waitlist for my private parent coaching community for ongoing parent coaching and encouragement - http://themompsychologist.com/sisterhood

So you've been trying all the latest tips and tricks when it comes to positive parenting. You've been reading up on tantrums and you're trying to validate your child's feelings and label their emotions because ultimately you want to raise an emotionally intelligent child who makes good choices. The only catch is it seems to backfire in the moment. Rather than helping to calm your child's tantrum, your words seem to escalate them! You go to talk about feelings, and it only activates their feelings even more! What gives?! Well in this episode of Ask Dr. Jaz, I breakdown the common reasons why your words backfire and how the experience may feel for your child. I also dive into what to do and say during these stressful moments if your words seem to hurt rather than help. PS: Call (916) 581-0177‬ to submit your question for a chance to be featured in a future episode.

I know the topic of rewards while potty training can be a bit controversial and many of us have mixed feelings. In this week's episode, I share my candid clinical recommendations as well as my personal experience when it comes to rewards and potty training. But I'll cut to the chase in this email - I think it's up to the parent/caregiver to decide. Every parent is so different and what motivates one child might not motivate another.  I think it's important to decide what's best for your family even if it takes a bit of trial and error to get there.  This week's episode dives in to what positive reinforcement is, the different forms (including rewards) and some things to consider about each form.  Now one thing I didn't mention in the episode that I want to make clear is there's a difference between rewards and bribing. Rewards are pre-planned and intentional. It follows the behavior you're trying to teach while bribes precede the behavior. A reward sounds like, "WHEN you sit on the potty, THEN you'll receive this." VS a bribe sounds like, "I'll give you a piece of candy IF you sit on the potty." Bribes are often done out of desperation and overwhelm. Visit https://themompsychologist.com/pottybootcamp to check out my potty training class!

The number one question I receive when it comes to potty training is, "How do I know when they're ready???"

Here's the thing - there's no magical age when it comes to potty training.

Every child is different and should start when they are developmentally ready.

In general, you want to look out for developmental signs of readiness including:
✔Physiological development
✔Motor development
✔Cognitive and language development
✔Emotional and social development

In this episode, break down exactly what the most common signs are in each category. Keep in mind, they don't need to show *all* signs to be deemed ready and there are things you can do to help prepare them for potty training (discussed during the episode).

POTTY TRAINING CLASS: Visit http://www.themompsychologist.com/pottybootcamp for all the details.

The early days and weeks of potty training can be really tricky! Accidents and resistance are par for the course. But with all the struggles, it can be hard to know what to do and say while potty training. In this video, I'll breakdown: ✔Top phrases to avoid saying while potty training ✔Why you want to avoid these phrases ✔What to do and say in the moment for more potty training success! Need more potty training support? Don't miss my live potty training class on Feb. 16th! Click the link for all the details! http://www.themompsychologist.com/pottybootcamp

Of course we hope our children never encounter an unsafe stranger. We hope they will never be in a place where they have to scream and defend themselves against an unsafe person or stranger.

But, just as with other important life skills, this is an important life skill to teach our children. Begin to teach them about strangers around age 4.

You'll also want to teach about body boundaries and consent. Unfortunately, some familiar adults can prove dangerous as well.

In this episode, I share:
✔Important things to teach before teaching about stranger danger
✔How to define who a stranger is and who a trusted person is
✔What to teach them to do and say if they find themselves in an unsafe situation
✔And more!