“Our foster daughter was doing virtual school. My partner was doing virtual school in the other room. My foster daughter couldn't really stay in virtual school unless I was right next to her, and I was often also on a video call with her social worker ,whose daughter was in virtual school. So it was just like, infinity schools in our house.”

Ashleigh had recently quit her job to become a foster parent, and found herself intensively parenting almost 24/7 when Covid lockdowns began. Here, she and Miranda discuss what life was like then, and how those dense days continue to impact her perspective as a parent now.

Links:

* Our pandemic parenting survey (you can still take it if you want to)

* The first episode of our pandemic parenting series

If you love (or honestly even just like) the work that Sarah & Miranda do here on Mother Of It All, please consider becoming a paid subscriber. You support this work (thank you) and will get access to super special content like subscriber-only episodes and even very awesome tote bags for founding members.

“I had already formed an identity as a parent, which made it easier for me to make decisions in the best interest of my family and kids during that time without heightened fear of judgment. I continue to be grateful for that. If I had had my first child during Covid I know it would have been different.”

As part of our pandemic parenting series, Christine, a parent in Brooklyn, joins Miranda to share her reflections on giving birth for the 4th time in 2020, as well as her observations as a teacher about how pandemic isolation impacted not so much child development but parental development.

Links:

* Our pandemic parenting survey (you can still take it if you want to)

* The first episode of our pandemic parenting series

If you love (or honestly even just like) the work that Sarah & Miranda do here on Mother Of It All, please consider becoming a paid subscriber. You support this work (thank you) and will get access to super special content like subscriber-only episodes and even very awesome tote bags for founding members.

About 500 parents poured their hearts out in the pandemic parenting survey that we sent out into the world last fall. We’ve been reading your words for a few months (THANK YOU) , and now, here we are in March of 2025. Somehow, it’s been five years since the world shut down, and we’re ready to talk through our own pandemic experiences, share some of our favorite quotes from those responses, and we’re also so grateful to share some of the over-arching themes from your many, thoughtful survey responses.

This episode also kicks off our pandemic parenting series: Through the month of March, every few days we’ll share conversations with parents whose survey responses were particularly interesting or emblematic. Hey, we all parented hard through a global pandemic! So, that was pretty weird. A lot of us miss those slower days, while a lot of us absolutely do NOT. Some of us moved across the country. Some of us got divorced. We’re still worried about our kids. We’re still a little anxious. We learned everything can change overnight. We know our neighbors better. Any way you slice it, that time is still with us. Let’s talk about it!

* Our pandemic parenting survey (you can still take it if you want to)

* America’s Mothers Are in Crisis: Is anyone listening to them? Jessica Grose (New York Times)

* Pandemic Oral History by Jon Mooallem (New York Times)

* “Successes and Lessons Learned in Responding to the Needs of Pediatricians, Children, and Families During the COVID-19 Pandemic” American Academy of Pediatrics

* “I'll Be First In Line To Vaccinate My Kids, But I'll Never Forget That We Were Last” Miranda (Romper)

* Meaghan O’Connell rules

* Every Mom I Know Is On Antidepressants (Romper)

A lot of people who took our pandemic parenting survey thanked us for just asking how parenting through a global pandemic was, and giving them space to process it all. We really do want to hear about your pandemic experiences — feel free to share your own experiences in the anonymous survey (linked above) or in the comments below.

If you love (or honestly even just like) the work that Sarah & Miranda do here on Mother Of It All, please consider becoming a paid subscriber. You support this work (thank you) and will get access to super special content like subscriber-only episodes and even very awesome tote bags for founding members.

Sarah is joined by Garrett Bucks, founder of The Barnraisers Project and author of the The White Pages and The Right Kind of White, to talk about the movies of 2024 and what they say about gender, parenting, sex, and more. Find out which of the 24 and 39 movies Garrett and Sarah watched (respectively) are their best and worst. Also — why Dune is a boymom movie, why Garrett had to fast-forward The Substance, and why Challengers is this year’s Mamma Mia.

* Garrett’s Letterboxd

* Together (the Swedish one)

* Richard Brody’s review of The Brutalist

* Richard Brody’s review of Emilia Pérez

* Lindy West’s S**t Actually

* Babygirl director on Death, Sex, and Money

The Double Shift’s Katherine Goldstein joins Sarah and Miranda to talk about her creative solution to the problem that is American summer, why parents are set up to fail in finding summer care, and how to actively create the kind of community we need to build something better.

Links:

* The Incredible Things You Can Do Instead of Paying For American Summer Camp

* How Other Countries Handle Summer with Kids

* Katherine’s How to Find Your People Club

* Ezra Klein Show - Sabbath and the Art of Rest

We’re continuing to focus on the experience of trans children and their parents this week with this reading of the exquisite essay As They Like It: Learning To Follow My Child’s Lead, by the author, Nicole Graev Lipson. The piece — about gender in Shakespeare and Nicole’s journey of watching her child let go of girlhood — was originally published in the Virginia Quarterly Review and then included in The Best American Essays, 2024, edited by Wesley Morris. It’s also part of Nicole’s upcoming collection, Mothers and Other Fictional Characters, which will be published on March 4th.

Links:

* Order Nicole’s book Mothers and Other Fictional Characters

* Read As They Like It: Learning To Follow My Child’s Lead

* Check out Nicole’s book events and other great work

Today Marlo Mack, of the How To Be A Girl podcast, and her friend, “Kay,” join us to talk about their experiences of raising transgender kids in America today. We also dig into what families with transgender kids expect to be dealing with under Trump’s second term, and how those of us with trans kids in our lives and hearts can step up and become more active allies in an increasingly unsafe landscape.

Links:

* Trump Is Trying to Make It Illegal to Help a Trans Child

* Marlo’s beautiful short cartoon about her daughter’s transition

* How to Be A Girl Podcast

* Erin Reed’s trans youth safety map

* Marlo’s memoir, How to be a Girl

* Trans Support Signs and more

* March 31st Trans Day of Visibility Events

Culture Recommendations:

* Vera on BritBox

* Morbid Podcast

* Two Girls One Ghost

* More of Marlo’s author recommendations:

* Julia Serano

* Jan Morris

* Janet Mock

* Jennifer Finney Boylan

Additional links to support trans youth:

* Trans Youth Equality Foundation Emergency Fund

* Bay Area Rainbow Families Ally Kit

* SFUSD’s letter of support for trans kids (inspiring template for other districts)

* Template for writing to healthcare institutions in support of trans care

* How parents can support educators right now from Garrett Bucks

* Claire Zulkey’s fundraiser for the Trevor Project

Sarah and Miranda move through their own climate change cognitive dissonance with the help of Elizabeth Doerr, author of the Cramming for the Apocalypse project. We discuss how parenting lends itself to climate action, how facing the climate reality can actually make you less anxious, and how mothers can give prepper stereotypes a much-needed makeover.

Links:

* Scribente Maternum

* Cramming for the Apocalypse

* How Do You Plan For a Future That Might Not Exist? by Liz Plank

“I miss my 2015 brain, the one unburdened by the weight of relentless catastrophes, and I miss my 2015 problems, those small, manageable worries that felt so monumental at the time. But more than that, I mourn the 2025 happiness I once allowed myself to envision, a life shimmering with possibility, untouched by the shadow of all we’ve lost. I grieve the future I was so certain would be mine, the life I thought I was building towards. I can’t pinpoint the moment it slipped through my fingers, but I know it’s gone. Most of all, I ache for the version of myself who believed in that future, who had the audacity to imagine a world that was bright and brimming with promise.

What we’re all feeling is grief. Not the tidy, private kind, but a vast, collective mourning that binds us together. We are grieving not just the world we’ve lost but the futures we were promised, the ones we dared to dream of and expected to inherit.”

* What If We Get It Right? by Ayana Elizabeth Johnson and her Climate Action Venn Diagram

* Kathryn Schulz’s New Yorker article about the Cascadia Fault Earthquake

* Ecopsychological Development and Maternal Ecodistress During Matrescence by Aurelie Athan

* Twilight Greenaway’s Substack, The Window, with regular climate news coverage

* Donate to Baby2Baby’s fire relief support

* More links from Liz:

* How to pack a go bag

* Our Children’s Trust

* Families for Climate

* Anya Kamenetz's Substack The Golden Hour

* Liz Doerr and Brekke Wagoner’s 10-week preparedness guide

* Britt Wray's Generation Dread takes on climate grief head-on

Katie Beck is a Policy Fellow at the London School of Economics where she helps municipal leaders design more child-friendly cities. She joined us to chat about what child-friendly, care-centered city design really looks like, and who is doing it well. We talk about Bogota’s revolutionary ‘care blocks,’ what happened when Athens experimented with using a few parking spaces as a park instead, and how easy it really can be to make cities more child-friendly now. We dig into the ways that everybody benefits when cities are designed (or re-designed) with caregiver well-being in mind, and how we can advocate for care-centric urban policies and design in our own cities.

* Links:

* Witch podcast from BBC

* Leslie Kern’s Feminist City: Claiming Space in a Man-Made World

* Bogota’s Care Blocks: Creating Time for Caregivers: Care Blocks as pathways to social inclusion in Bogotá

* More than 90% of the world’s children breathe toxic air every day

* The Bed Book by Sylvia Plath

Sarah & Miranda kiss winter break goodbye with a chat about resolutions, witchy solstices, cyclical time, Pamela Adlon, school start times, time jelly, and more!

This episode is for our beautiful *paid subscribers* (thank you!) and could also be called Winter Break: The Good, The Bad & The Either Way It's Almost Over.

How are you all holding up out ther…