The majority of us have heard of, or maybe have even taken an IQ Test before, but what about an EQ Test? 

IQ (intelligence quotient) is used to measure academic abilities and identify individuals with off-the-chart intelligence or mental challenges. On the other hand, EQ (emotional quotient), is an individual's ability to identify, evaluate, control, and express emotions.

From a practical standpoint, if you answer YES to the following set of questions, chances are that you have developed some or all of the abilities that establish the foundation of emotional intelligence: 

Quote: “If your emotional abilities aren't in hand, if you don't have self-awareness, if you are not able to manage your distressing emotions, if you can't have empathy and have effective relationships, then no matter how smart you are, you are not going to get very far.” - Daniel Goleman

There are FIVE MAIN Components of Emotional Intelligence we’re going to discuss: Self-Awareness, Self-Regulation, Internal Motivation, Empathy and Social Skills!

Having a high EQ means you take the time to reflect on and analyze your feelings and thoughts, you take a moment to PAUSE (and THINK) before you speak, decide and/or take action, you have conviction in the management and controlling of your internal dialogue, you provide feedback and respond well to constructive criticism, you FORGIVE and forget, you HELP, uplift and PRAISE others. 

The value of, and the benefits associated w/ building and strengthening your emotional intelligence are seemingly ENDLESS in terms of personal and professional achievement. 

mRuddo.com #TheMotivationMovement @mRuddo

Leadership is more than a position. Being a leader requires taking action and setting an example. There comes a time in everyone's life where you’re intentionally or randomly thrusted into a position of leadership. Whether you’re leading a team, a project, an entire organization, or a meeting, you consciously or unconsciously are implementing one or a mix of a few different styles of leadership.

There are many factors that help to mold one’s leadership style: life experience, personality, organizational culture, environmental influences and beyond.

It’s very common to think about leadership, and leaders, as simply GOOD or BAD. Leadership goes beyond GOOD or BAD though. It’s not always that straightforward.

“One of the most important things for any leader is to never let anyone else define who you are. And you define who you are. I never think of myself as being a woman CEO of this company. I think of myself as a steward of a great institution.” – Virginia Marie "Ginni" Rometty

For leaders, or those aspiring to be leaders, understanding the numerous approaches to leadership is very important. Identifying the successes and shortcomings of your leadership methodology and analyzing why it does and doesn’t work in certain situations, is equally important.

Through learning about the FIVE different styles we’re going to discuss today, you should be able to become more flexible in your management strategies and adapt to the different obstacles leaders often face.

1) Autocratic

2) Authoritarian

3) Democratic

4) Laissez Faire

5) Transactional

Not everyone is a natural-born leader, but practice makes perfect. It may seem difficult to change leadership styles, or develop your signature style, but it’s WORTH it if the success of your organization, project, or team is truly important to you. Authenticity is contagious and inspiring; dishonesty and deception isn’t. Your followers can smell your BS from a mile away.

Imagine the leaders you have been inspired by in the past or are currently inspired by today.

How did you respond to these various styles of leadership? Which style naturally spoke to you the best?

The principle we are going to examine today, the different FORMS OF POWER, could be what influences you to respond to, and hopefully be motivated by, a particular person’s influence.

“Ultimately, leadership is not about glorious crowning acts. It’s about keeping your team focused on a goal and motivated to do their best to achieve it, especially when the stakes are high and the consequences really matter. It is about laying the groundwork for others’ success, and then standing back and letting them shine.” - Chris Hadfield

NUMBER ONE . . . Legitimate power is probably the most recognized form of power and style of leadership.

NUMBER TWO . . . Reward power comes from an authority figures ability to compensate another for being compliant and following orders.

NUMBER THREE . . . Expert power is based on an individual’s level of skill and knowledge. In layman’s terms, think of karate, the experts all have black belts.

NUMBER FOUR . . . Referent power is a bit superficial; it could be the results of one’s perceived worthiness and/or attractiveness. It’s seemingly power that is not a result of any special or particular reason. Referent power is sometimes though of as an “x-factor” of sorts.

Finally, NUMBER 5 . . . Coercive power is sourced from the ability to punish others for being disobedient. A leader who uses coercive power strategically withholds rewards as a punishment; it is the opposite of reward power.

With great power comes great responsibility. Some leaders leverage their power to make a positive impact, while others have more sinister and/or selfish intentions. If you find yourself in any type of leadership role, you need to understand the best strategy to keep your team, your family, your class, WHOEVER, motivated to be their best, to achieve great results, and to produce at the highest possible standard. Anyone is capable of holding power and influencing others.

mRuddo.com #TheMotivationMovement @mRuddo

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We traditionally view the act of forgiving as an acceptance or acknowledgement of someone’s wrongdoing against you, a symbolization of your readiness and willingness to move on and grow from the situation, but, SELF-forgiveness is a concept that is just as important.

Whether it is forgiving yourself or someone else, I am sure we can all relate and recall an experience we had with forgiveness. What many of us do not know is that forgiveness is good for our health, as holding grudges ACTUALLY takes a serious physical toll on us. 

“They caused the first wound, but you are causing the rest; this is what not forgiving does. They got it started, but you keep it going. Forgive and let it go, or it will eat you alive. You think they made you feel this way, but when you won’t forgive, you are the one inflicting the pain on yourself.” - Bryant McGill

It may sound selfish, but you need to realize that forgiveness benefits YOU more than anyone or anything. Forgiveness is very much an internal process, it’s more than just exchanging apologies with your friend, ex, or whoever! The truth is, the other person, or people, may never know about your forgiveness. BUT, forgiveness as a mental health practice, as a tool, can lighten the load on your body and on your spirit. 

You’re going to regret not forgiving someone, or not forgiving YOURSELF, later in live. You’ll be upset with yourself because not forgiving prevented you from experience new possibilities, and from sharing more of your journey with the person you never reconciled your differences with.

FORGIVENESS requires action, it doesn’t just magically occur one day after a given amount of time. Forgiveness isn’t easy, that’s why there is actually a practice mental health professionals apply called “forgiveness training,” which is a combination of behavioral therapy and relaxation techniques. If I had to boil down the forgiveness process to a few sweet and simple principles, I’d say Step 1) is VALIDATION, Step 2) is RELEASE and Step 3) is EVOLVE.

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Hindsight is 20/20 . . . We’ve all taken the time to contemplate on how different our lives would be IF we had taken a different path.

We, as humans, have a habit of looking back on missed opportunities, and fantasizing that, had we seized the moment, it could have set our lives off on an extraordinarily amazing alternative course . . .

Nonsense, OF COURSE. If you don’t honestly examine the reasons and actions that led to your feeling of regret, you’ll never be able to come to grips with your current reality.

Regret is a POWERFUL emotion and can be used as a source of inspiration.

“I see it all perfectly; there are two possible situations - one can either do this or that. My honest opinion and my friendly advice is this: do it or do not do it - you will regret both.” - Kierkegaard

Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. Woulda, coulda, shoulda syndrome affects all of us differently. Regret totally drains some of us, it slows us down, while others thrive from regret, and are excited to become better from the emotion.

When you’re inundated with regret, ask yourself the following questions: What emotions are you feeling right now? Why are you disturbed by this feeling? How could you have handled the situation better? What will you do to never let this happen again?

@mRuddo #TheMotivationMovement mRuddo.com

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Meditation is an amazing tool that be used anywhere, at any time, by anyone. Meditation is not a one size fits all practice though. There is a HUGE variety in terms of different meditation techniques, that each offer their own unique path to inner peace and relaxation.

Like many of the concepts we explore on The Motivation Movement, meditation, when practiced consistently, has legitimate health advantages such as reduced anxiety and sensitivity to pain, boosted immune system and helps prevent stress. Meditation doesn’t have to just be deep breathing, while sitting down on a fluffy cushion with your legs crossed and eyes closed.

“There is no good or bad meditation — there is simply awareness or non-awareness. To begin with, we get distracted a lot. Over time, we get distracted less. Be gentle with your approach, be patient with the mind, and be kind to yourself along the way. Clarity dictates our perspective, and our perspective dictates our experience. Get more clarity in your life.” - Andy Puddicombe

The most important thing to remember is there is no right or wrong way to meditate. As you enter a meditation, just be yourself. Open your mind and your heart and receive the richness that may come from your meditation.

Expectations often get in the way of one's experience. Don't attempt to control your meditation. Let go of all preconceived notions as to what is "suppose" to happen. These preconceived notions could get in the way of your experience. Your experience will be different from the experience of others.

@mRuddo #TheMotivationMovement mRuddo.com

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We use animals to examine certain features of ourselves. We imagine ourselves being as strong as an ox, as fierce as a lion, as smart as a dolphin, or we have the memory of an elephant.

"We patronize the animals for their incompleteness, for their tragic fate of having taken form so far below ourselves. And therein we err, and greatly err. For the animal shall not be measured by man. In a world older and more complete than ours, they are more finished and complete, gifted with extensions of the senses we have lost or never attained, living by voices we shall never hear. They are not brethren, they are not underlings; they are other Nations, caught with ourselves in the net of life and time, fellow prisoners of the splendour and travail of the earth." - Henry Beston

Determination, team-work and forgiveness are the TOP THREE lessons we can learn from animals.

Thinking like an animal, suspending ourselves from all of the social constructs us humans have created, we realize what’s important in our lives.

It becomes easier to focus on the basics like health, rest, caring for our families, eating, etc., and in general, to let go of attachments. The playful nature of some animals allows us to not take life so seriously, it reminds us to be vulnerable and have fun.

mRuddo.com #TheMotivationMovement @mRuddo

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I’m going to try and keep this one mostly motivational, and not too scientific, but the data is in, and it clearly shows that gratitude can improve general well-being, strengthen social relations, increase resilience and reduce stress.

Gratitude is just being appreciative of the non-monetary related aspects of life; you can be grateful about your health, family, friends, pets, celebrations, etc.

“To educate yourself for the feeling of gratitude means to take nothing for granted, but to always seek out and value the kind that will stand behind the action. Nothing that is done for you is a matter of course. Everything originates in a will for the good, which is directed at you. Train yourself never to put off the word or action for the expression of gratitude.” - Albert Schweitzer

If you take nothing for granted, if you seek the good in the unlikeliest of places, if you are actively expressing your gratitude, you will find or achieve happiness and peace much sooner.

In terms of the psychological benefits, gratitude encourages positive thoughts and emotions, more awareness and alertness, and increased self-satisfaction.

For physical benefits, studies suggest you develop a stronger immune system, less body pains and aches, and optimum blood pressure and cardiac functioning.

Finally, the social benefits include better communication, more likeability among peers, more interest and involvement as a team member and beyond.

You need to actively CULTIVATE and foster gratitude.

mRuddo.com #TheMotivationMovement @mRuddo

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Whether you would like to acknowledge it or not, everybody is a salesperson.

You are selling yourself when asking for a raise, or for more responsibility at work.

You are selling to your team members on a strategy when you propose a new idea or campaign.

You are selling to your kid when you are bartering with them to do their chores.

We are also constantly being sold to, so we in essence all engage in negotiations on a daily basis as well.

When politicians are campaigning for our votes, when a new restaurant in town runs a great deal to drum up new customers, when the pastor at the congregation is preaching, when our significant other is trying to eat chicken for dinner when you want a burger . . .

SALES IS EVERYWHERE, you can’t hide from it.

Now, you may not be the great salesperson to ever grace the earth, but I challenge you to develop your sales skills because there are few other skills as universally useful as sales.

“The purpose of a pitch isn’t necessarily to move others immediately to adopt your idea. The purpose is to offer something so compelling that it begins a conversation, brings the other person in as a participant, and eventually arrives at an outcome that appeals to both of you.” - Daniel H. Pink

Have integrity, meet a need and solve a problem. Once your perspective shifts to “How can I serve?”, VS “How can I sell?”, you’ll feel much better about being labeled a salesperson.

@mRuddo #TheMotivationMovement mRuddo.com

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This is one of those concepts that once explained, most people innately understand, but they would not know the meaning just by hearing the phrase, locus of control. I sure as hell did not know what the hell it meant until I started researching it more in-depth.

When faced with obstacles in life, do you feel that you have power over the situation?

Or, do you believe that you are at the mercy of external forces?

As the world around you changes, you can either ascribe the positives and negatives to factors you have control over or pin them on happenings outside of your influence.

"Never allow anyone to rain on your parade and thus cast a pall of gloom and defeat on the entire day. Remember that no talent, no self-denial, no brains, no character, are required to set up in the fault-finding business. Nothing external can have any power over you unless you permit it. Your time is too precious to be sacrificed in wasted days combating the menial forces of hate, jealously, and envy. Guard your fragile life carefully. Only God can shape a flower, but any foolish child can pull it to pieces." - Og Mandino

The fault-finding component of this quote struck me most: "No brains, no character, are required to set up in the fault-finding business."

It’s SO easy to blame your shortcomings on external forces.

People with internal control orientation often display the following characteristics:

(1) they take responsibility for their actions

(2) they’re less influenced by the opinion of others

(3) feel confident in the face of adversity

(4) usually have a strong sense of self

On the other hand, people with external control orientation typically:

(1) feel hopeless or powerless in the face of adversity

(2) don’t believe they can change their situation or make a difference

(3) credit luck or chance for any successes.

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