Evolutionary forces have created two competing psychological needs that contribute to happiness. Here's what they are, as well as the difference that self-differentiation makes.

Show Notes:

⁠For a happier life, we must balance two old psychological needs ⁠by William von Hippel

⁠The Hadza: Hunter-Gatherers of Tanzania⁠ by Frank Marlowe

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Self-differentiation is about knowing your own goals and values, which builds resilience. Here’s the research that shows why.

Show Notes:

How To Be Resilient: 5 Secrets To Success When Life Gets Impossible by Eric Barker

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Dr. Michael Kerr, who studied under Murray Bowen, identifies two levels of self-differentiation. Here’s what they are and why they matter to the non-anxious leader.

Show Notes:

Interview with Michael Kerr 2007 from the Family Systems Institute

Dr. Michael Kerr

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When a leader overfunctions, their followers naturally underfunction. Here are three things you can do if you have followed such a leader.

Show Notes:

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Overfunctioning parents aren't helping their kids, they're hurting them. The same is true for leaders. Here's what that looks like and what to do differently.

Show Notes:

Parents Who Hire Elite Tutors Are Setting Up Their Kids for Failure by Katie Roiphe

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Emotionally dependent people make demands that often use fear, obligation and/or guilt. Here's how to manage yourself and the situation.

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How to Disarm any Narcissist

Behavior Expert Reveals Exactly What To Say To A Narcissist - Chase Hughes

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How we respond to challenge and crisis is a big factor in whether we will survive and even thrive. These three factors come from a lecture that Edwin Friedman gave in 1985.

Show Notes:

Generation to Generation: Family Process in Church and Synagogue

The Center for Family Process

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Non-anxious leaders take action, however small. Even if you are happy (currently), this episode covers what you can do when you're frustrated with your country and the world.

Show Notes:

Future Christian Podcast

Ground News

Episode 304: What to Do Now that the Election Is Over

Episode 276: 10 Steps to Effectively Deal with Resistance (Part 1 of 2)

Episode 277: 10 Steps to Effectively Deal with Resistance (Part 2 of 2)

Calling People Forward Instead of Out: Ten Essential Steps - Non Profit News | Nonprofit Quarterly

Discipleship Ministries | Ground Rules for Group Discussion

18 Ground Rules for Group Discussions | Facilitator School

Ground Rules: How to Set Successful Guidelines for Your Conversation Programs | Programming Librarian

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Dr. Becky Kennedy's AVP strategy is designed for parenting, but it can help you in any anxious situation.

Show Notes:

Emotional Regulation in Children - Good Inside

Episode 99: A Family Systems Take on Non-Violent (or Compassionate) Communication – Part 1

Episode 100: A Family Systems Take on Non-Violent (or Compassionate) Communication – Part 2

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In Seth Godin’s new book, This Is Strategy, he outlines 10 elements of a system. In this episode, I outline elements seven through ten in family systems terms.

Show Notes:

This Is Strategy by Seth Godin*

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