The Nonsense Burger

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Salutations you silly geese!!  Welcome back to another wacky week of The Nonsense Burger!!  Today the Nonsensical Pair pays tribute to the fanny pack while Earl attempts to justify his wearing of cargo shorts.  From there they dive into some of life's greatest mysteries, such as:  Why do charter bus seat covers and bowling alley carpets appear to utilize the same nauseating patterns?  Why do solo elevator farts always prompt a stranger into your space at the most inopportune time?  Where do all of our socks go slinking off to after they've gone missing during a wash cycle?  How did the junk drawer become a household staple still in action today?  Plenty of questions, plenty of theories, and not so many answers.  To top it all off, with the consumption of alcohol becoming a popular quarantine hobby, the Pair rip through some of their favorite (and not so favorite) domestic beers.  They're here to laugh.  They're here to grin.  So download the episode and slide right in (that's what she said)!  And don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe!  Or hunt us down on social media using the hashtag #thenonsenseburger for Twitter, Instagram and anywhere else.  Listen on iTunes, Spotify, Google, Stitcher, and any of your other favorite podcast apps.

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Hiya all you sour gummy worms!!  Grocery stores used to be the place you'd head when you needed to stock up on all those Oreo's.  Now it's about the only damn place any of us can go.  Let's talk about the good old days when navigating through the aisles was akin to solving a corn maze in the middle of October.  For better or worse, Francis spares us all and forgoes his Top 40 talent singing.  Earl admits to his family willingly buying animals from strangers posted out in front of his local grocery stores as a child.  The Nonsensical Pair also question whether or not cashiers ever passed a highschool level mathematics class.  Now grab a cart, pull out that scroll of a shopping list, and let's get downright silly!!  All you Fine Folks are our one true love, and if you love the show just as much, then don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe.  Or hunt us down on social media using the hashtag #thenonsenseburger for Twitter, Instagram and anywhere else.  Listen on iTunes, Spotify, Google, Stitcher, and any of your other favorite podcast apps.

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Sweet sassy molassy folks!  Today the Nonsensical Pair found another gem in the old treasure chest.  What gives with all the soaps, washes, detergents, and deodorants out there having wildly exotic scent descriptions?  Does the Yankee Candle Company know no limits to the vast array of garbage smells they continue pumping out?  Were you ever curious to uncover the true names of either Count Chocula or Captain Crunch?  One could only discover those answers by rifling off their top 10 favorite cereal characters, which is exactly what Earl and Francis do for you in this week's first episode!  Also, somewhere along the way hobby horses are mentioned, yet they're irrelevant to the conversation as a whole.  So grab your partner, do si do, and let's square-dance into another delightful session of the Burger!  We adore you Fine Folks and if you adore the show then don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe.  Or hunt us down on social media using the hashtag #thenonsenseburger for Twitter, Instagram and anywhere else.  Listen on iTunes, Spotify, Google, Stitcher, and any of your other favorite podcast apps.

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Hot diggity....dog diggity....oh whatcha do to me!  Welcome back to the show!  The Nonsensical Pair dug a little deeper into their mixed bag of tricks and found even more Burgers for all you Fine Folks!  They also found out that the further you go, the more Nonsense you're likely to find.  Are ya curious yet?!  Today, Francis sang yet again and Earl hated him for it....again.  But hey, someone's got to be the "Freshmaker".  Anywho....the Pair get kookier than Tom Hanks painting a volleyball and giving it a name.  Earl's interested in knowing what drugs you'd feed your parents if given the option.  Francis wants to know what kind of nutjobs own exotic pets.  And just when you thought the fireworks were coming to an end, the Pair rip into their finale and breakdown their Top 6 most attractive animated female Disney characters.  Now say THAT ten times in a row.  Hey!  We're here to give you the giggles.  So jump into our second Mixed Bag of the week and let us know if you find some laughs in there.  Later gators!

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Zippity-Do-Da Folks!  Throw on your swim trunks, roll out that plastic runway, crank up the garden hose, and let's all slip n' slide into a Mixed Bag of Burgers!  Oh yes, you read that right.  The Nonsensical Pair dispense with the themed topics this week and just start chucking junk onto the grill.  Today, Francis sings coffee theme songs, does his best All-4-One impersonation, reminds you all that Mariah Carey used to be attractive, and goes public with his acknowledgment of the Cool Runnings soundtrack being the first CD (compact disc) he ever owned.  Meanwhile, Earl suspects that there's a connection to how much wood a woodchuck might chuck and whether or not Fuzzy Wuzzy was in fact a fuzzy bear.  The Pair also manage to rank and debate a list of the top-grossing pizza chains in the country.  Side-saddle up you root-tootin' outlaws!  We're all in for a doozy.  Make sure to rate, review, and subscribe to the show.  We want your input!  Take care.

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Merry Friday Lovelies!  May we present to you the first rendition of The Burger's Fan Appreciation Friday episode!  Coincidentally, it's also the first time Francis and Earl record a show whilst not staring into each other's tender gaze.  Fear not!  We press on.  Today is all about nudging our listeners into the spotlight!  We've compiled all of your comments from the month of March and giggle our way through the entire list.  Sure, it's dangerous.  Yes, we've found most of you are just as preposterous as we two.  But boy do we appreciate all the wacky content!  Hope y'all are taking care of yourselves and we sure hope we can wrangle a few laughs outta ya today.  Enjoy the show and enjoy your fellow humans' contributions; we sure did.  Oh, and do your best to enjoy the weekend!  Love you!

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When we say "Fine!", you say "Folks!"  FINE FOLKS!!  Salutations all you adorable little goblins!  Today the Nonsensical Pair takes a stroll down Memory Lane once again.  We review some of our favorite toys we had growing up, which leads to what we wish we could do as adults that we were able to enjoy as children.  Earl finds yet another way to sneak in a comment on masturbation.  Francis leads off the show by massaging your ears with a little ditty from the classic show The Reading Rainbow.  Things only spiral out of control from there on out.  Golly gee willy she's a doozie of an episode!  But don't take our word for it; digest all the absurdity for yourself!  Now tie that apron tight, polish that spatula, and let's grill some Nonsense Burgers!  And please don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe to the show.  We sure would appreciate the support.  Search the plethora of apps out there for the Nonsense Burger and you'll find us.  Love you.

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Afternoon all you Fine Folks!  NWT's coming at ya full steam ahead and this one's a DOOZY!  Francis had an accident over the weekend and the Nonsensical pair relive every moment.  On top of all that, we give you a glimpse into the future and what your two episodes might sound like.  Hint:  We're moving our Thursday slot to Friday in anticipation of The Burger's first-ever FAN APPRECIATION FRIDAY!  That's right.  We're recording Friday's show just for all the Fine Folks out there.  Looking forward to getting silly with you!  Take care.  Oh, and don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe to the NONSENSE!!

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Quack....quack....all you Fine Folks!  The Nonsensical Pair wiggle into a chat around locker rooms today.  Join us for a magical mystery tour involving semi-tiled rooms filled with completely naked individuals.  We talk personal locker room experiences, our favorite locker room scenes from movies past, and one very important question which arose from it all:  Who was sexier in their prime?  Tom Cruise or Val Kilmer?  Feed your ears a bowl full of grapes while you cool them off with a giant palm branch.  In other words, download The Burger's latest episode and have some fun with Francis and Earl!  We're keen on all of you.  Tweet your insight using the hashtag #thenonsenseburger on Twitter and everywhere else!  Also, don't forget to rate, review, and subscribe to the show on iTunes, Google, Spotify, Stitcher, and any other app you can get your grubby little paws on.  

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Hey, all you Fine Folks!  Welcome to week three, where we get silly right outta the gates!  You're going to want to wash your hands before and after today's episode, but we're not worried; we know you've had enough practice up to this point.  Today we explore all the happenings behind the bathroom door.  Baby wipes, sitdown showers, ghost poops, and many more topics most people are uncomfortable talking about, except the Nonsensical Pair!  So loosen that belt buckle, grab a newspaper, and let's fire one out together!  And if you're fancy to the Burger's style, please do NOT forget to rate, review, and subscribe to the show.  Oh, and sniff us out at www.thenonsenseburger.com if you're so inclined.  Love you, you little devils!