I should’ve known I was in for a revelatory conversation when I met with the family therapist Terry Real. He pioneered a book on male depression in the ‘90s, and he’s been helping countless people break through mental and relational barriers in the years since. I start the conversation by inquiring about how Terry knew he would be good at this work, and before I know it we’re talking about my mother — so I guess that answers that question. Terry is an excellent listener, and he has an impulse to make advice clear and accessible, extracting something universal from even the most specific of stories, including mine.

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