The Potential State Podcast

We all believe secretly that we are superior to our partners in certain areas (EITHOR 3 - the 95/70 dichotomy). This results from our insecurities and the necessities of building a stable system of distribution of power. Instead of feeling ashamed or hiding it, you should practice ownursh!t and say it to yourself and to your loved ones.
 In this talk I'll explain how I discovered this EITHOR 3, how it manifests in real relationships (my marriage and in the clinic) and end with practical tips how you can turn this unavoidable sh!t into compost!
Recorded live on FB.

www.potentialstate.com
https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-other-side-relationships
http://podcast.potentialstate.com/
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXwdZhwQFgUcRQgZoI_L2Uw
https://www.facebook.com/ThePotentialState
https://twitter.com/assael

Having a secret language has many benefits, mainly increasing intimacy and minimizing misunderstandings. It activates your 'upstairs' brains and reduces trauma mind. In this talk I will explore why you should start developing secret code words with the people you love. I will share examples from my life, the clinic and the theater world. Practical tips are given on how to build such a language in your life.
Recorded live on FB.

Come see all our videos on our YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXwdZhwQFgUcRQgZoI_L2Uw

We all SHOULD be doing more in our life and certainly with our loved ones.
But what prices do we pay when we believe or say that we SHOULD?
This talk explores the individual and relational consequences we all face when we use (or don't use) SHOULD.
Practical tips are given how to go beyond the SHOULD to WANT/WONT. Recorded live on FB.

www.potentialstate.com
https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-other-side-relationships
http://podcast.potentialstate.com/
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXwdZhwQFgUcRQgZoI_L2Uw
https://www.facebook.com/ThePotentialState
https://twitter.com/assael

Do you find yourself or your loved ones 'not understanding' something emotional or relational? There is a big relational price for not knowing.
This talk explains why 'I don't understand' is sometimes a very effective defense mechanism, yet actually creates distance in your relationships in the long run. Examples from the clinic and life show what happens when you don't know. Practical tips are given on how to dare to understand your intimate relationships.
Recorded live on FB.

www.potentialstate.com
https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-other-side-relationships
http://podcast.potentialstate.com/
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXwdZhwQFgUcRQgZoI_L2Uw
https://www.facebook.com/ThePotentialState
https://twitter.com/assael

Every day we hurt, ignore or just disappoint the ones we love for different reasons: we're too tired, too angry, not paying attention, focused on ourselves and more.
 Over time, these ruptures create a negative sentiment override where we tend to interpret our partner's behavior in a negative way.
 This talk details a simple technique that can help you overcome these unavoidable ruptures and maintain a happy, healthy relationship.
 Examples are given from the clinic and real life.
 Practical tips are given for you to give your love a second chance! 
Recorded live on FB.

Come see all our videos on our YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXwdZhwQFgUcRQgZoI_L2Uw

We truly want our partners and loved ones to succeed in life. But many times we subconsciously belittle them to actually feel better about ourselves, because we might have a core belief of "Either You or Me/Strong or Weak" (what I call EITHOR 1).

This talk explains why we do it and includes examples of how such depreciating manifests in the clinic and life. Practical tips are given on how to allow yourself to really celebrate your loved ones. Recorded live on FB.

Come see more Potential State videos on our YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXwdZhwQFgUcRQgZoI_L2Uw

Join us for a candid conversation with author, therapist and teacher David Lester​ about his new book Jewish Marriage: The Ceremony, The First Year, and the Journey That Follows.
We talk about love, intimacy, the different stages of marriage and about the secret to living 'happily ever after'.
Recorded live on FB.

Follow David and his book at
https://www.facebook.com/Jewish-Marriage-2978196602222842

The book can be purchased at
 https://www.amazon.com/Jewish-Marriage-Ceremony-Journey-Follows/dp/1946351644

Come see more Potential State videos on our YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXwdZhwQFgUcRQgZoI_L2Uw

All the episodes of the Potential State Podcast can be found here:
http://PotentialState.buzzsprout.com

Do you feel responsible for most of your partner's feelings? Do you feel like their pain is your responsibility or fault?
This talk might shock you when you see how these core beliefs limit your relationship and keep you feeling lonely and dependent.
 Examples are given from the clinic and life and tips are given on how to be closer to your loved ones without feeling the burden of guilt.  Recorded live on FB.

Come see all our videos on our YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXwdZhwQFgUcRQgZoI_L2Uw

How do we present ourselves to the world? 
We usually have a preferred way to bring ourselves in the world: either high status/one up, or low status/one down.
Come hear more about these concepts and how these two positions shape your relationships and your life.
Examples from the clinic and life illustrate this issue .
Practical tips are given on how to master the see-saw in your personal and professional life. Recorded live on FB.

Come see all our videos on our YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXwdZhwQFgUcRQgZoI_L2Uw

Good relationships (sometimes) have a good balance of give and take, co-creation and ALSO collaboration. By adding ALSO (and SOMETIMES) we actually improve the collaborative potential for synergy, thereby inserting some vitality and excitement to our everyday conversations.
 Examples are given from the clinic and life and practical tips how you can use also and sometimes to open your mind and your relationships. recorded live on FB.

www.potentialstate.com
https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-other-side-relationships
http://podcast.potentialstate.com/
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXwdZhwQFgUcRQgZoI_L2Uw
https://www.facebook.com/ThePotentialState
https://twitter.com/assael