The Reclamation Room: Self-Trust, Boundaries, and Healing After Narcissistic Abuse

In this episode of The Reclamation Room, I’m sitting down with Amanda Baker to explore a topic that’s at the heart of so many of our healing journeys: the complex relationship between empathy and narcissism.

If you’ve ever felt drained, confused, or triggered by someone’s behaviors and wondered why you keep showing up the way you do, this conversation is for you.

We get into how both empaths and narcissists often stem from similar wounds, why curiosity is such a powerful tool for growth, and how therapy and relational healing can guide us toward reclaiming our emotional lives.

Here’s what we explore together:

✨ How empaths and narcissists can share the same core wounds

✨ Why both patterns are rooted in protection, not malice

✨ Recognizing your own patterns as a key step toward healing

✨ Using curiosity instead of fear to break destructive cycles

✨ The difference between validating your feelings versus rescuing yourself

✨ Coping mechanisms, how they help and how they can hurt

✨ Why therapy is not just about feeling better but learning how to feel fully

✨ Connecting with others for relational growth

✨ Becoming curious with both your shadow and light for holistic healing

This episode might feel a little intense, but leaning into discomfort is where transformation happens. When we start noticing our patterns with curiosity and compassion, that’s when real healing begins.

💛 Join my ⁠free weekly women’s call⁠ on Tuesdays to dive deeper into these topics and experience coaching in real time

If this conversation resonates, please subscribe and leave a rating. It helps The Reclamation Room reach more women reclaiming their emotional power.

💜 Connect with Amanda Baker Website: ⁠amandabakerwrites.com⁠

💜 Support the Movement If this podcast and my work with Break the Silence Alabama speaks to you, you can support our mission by contributing to our Kickstarter campaign to bring survivor stories to national television: ⁠https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/ashana/bring-real-survivor-stories-to-national-tv⁠ Every pledge, share, and word of encouragement helps amplify this mission. Thank you for being part of the movement to break the silence. 💜

In this solo episode of The Reclamation Room, I’m diving into one of the most misunderstood (and honestly, probably triggering) parts of healing and relationships: the fine line between setting a boundary, being a doormat, and unconsciously trying to manipulate the other person.

If you’ve ever wondered, “Am I holding a boundary or am I being abusive, too?” this one’s for you.

We’ll explore how self-accountability isn’t about shaming yourself, but about developing the awareness that leads to real discernment: something many of us didn’t learn if we grew up around chaos, narcissism, or emotional immaturity.

Here’s what we get into: ✨ Why awareness must come before healthy boundaries ✨ The sneaky ways we can manipulate situations (even when our intentions are good) ✨ How self-compassion helps you face your “unregulated” or “unpolished” parts ✨ What real discernment might look like when you’re learning to trust yourself again ✨ The difference between setting a boundary to protect peace vs. control to receive connection ✨ How to protect your needs without losing your dignity, patience, or softness

This episode might make you a little uncomfortable.. and that’s the point. Growth comes outside of the comfort zone, right? When we start getting curious about why we do what we do, but with self-compassion rather than judgment, that’s when transformation happens.

If you’re ready to get radically self-honest, deepen your self-awareness, and learn how to hold space for both your needs and your humanity, this conversation will meet you right where you are.

💛 ⁠Join my free weekly women’s call on Tuesdays ⁠to explore these topics in community, and get a feel for how I coach in real time.

And if this episode resonates, please hit subscribe or leave a quick rating! It helps The Reclamation Room reach more women who are reclaiming their truth, one boundary at a time.

💜 Support the MovementIf this podcast and my work with Break the Silence Alabama speaks to you, I’d love your support. We’re currently running a Kickstarter campaign to help bring survivor stories to national television: raising awareness, inspiring healing, and creating real change around domestic violence recovery.

You can learn more and contribute here: ⁠https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/ashana/bring-real-survivor-stories-to-national-tv⁠

Every share, pledge, and word of encouragement helps amplify this mission. Thank you for being part of this movement to break the silence. 💜

In this solo episode of The Reclamation Room, I’m diving into one of the most misunderstood (and honestly, probably triggering) parts of healing and relationships: the fine line between setting a boundary, being a doormat, and unconsciously trying to manipulate the other person.

If you’ve ever wondered, “Am I holding a boundary or am I being abusive, too?” this one’s for you.

We’ll explore how self-accountability isn’t about shaming yourself, but about developing the awareness that leads to real discernment: something many of us didn’t learn if we grew up around chaos, narcissism, or emotional immaturity.

Here’s what we get into:
✨ Why awareness must come before healthy boundaries
✨ The sneaky ways we can manipulate situations (even when our intentions are good)
✨ How self-compassion helps you face your “unregulated” or “unpolished” parts
✨ What real discernment might look like when you’re learning to trust yourself again
✨ The difference between setting a boundary to protect peace vs. control to receive connection
✨ How to protect your needs without losing your dignity, patience, or softness

This episode might make you a little uncomfortable.. and that’s the point. Growth comes outside of the comfort zone, right?
When we start getting curious about why we do what we do, but with self-compassion rather than judgment, that’s when transformation happens.

If you’re ready to get radically self-honest, deepen your self-awareness, and learn how to hold space for both your needs and your humanity, this conversation will meet you right where you are.

💛 Join my ⁠free weekly women’s call⁠ on Tuesdays to go deeper and experience live coaching. We also have a ⁠private community ⁠where the conversation continues.

And if this episode resonates, please hit subscribe or leave a quick rating! It helps The Reclamation Room reach more women who are reclaiming their truth, one boundary at a time.

In this episode of The Reclamation Room, I’m joined by my dear friend Sonya Luna: a life coach, acupuncturist, and one of the most authentic & hilarious humans I know. She actually invites me to share part of my story in this episode! So much fun. Join us as we sit down for a powerful conversation about healing from narcissistic abuse.

If you’ve ever questioned your reality, felt stuck in a trauma bond you know isn’t healthy, or struggled to trust yourself again after gaslighting and manipulation, you’re not alone. This conversation goes right to the heart of what makes recovery so complex, and why it’s also so profoundly transformative.

Here’s what we get into:

Why cognitive dissonance keeps us stuck (and how to start breaking free)

How the trauma bond forms and what it actually takes to untangle from it

The deeper layers of the “mother wound” and disconnection from the divine feminine

How your body’s wisdom can guide you through healing

Small, practical ways to rebuild self-trust, self-love, and sovereignty

We also talk about how narcissistic abuse isn’t just an individual issue: it’s a reflection of a larger cultural disconnection from empathy, intuition, and nature. Healing yourself ripples outward. 💛

If you’re in the messy middle of untangling from abuse or learning to love yourself again, this episode is a reminder that you’re not broken: you’re becoming.

And if this conversation resonates with you, please hit subscribe or leave a rating. It helps this space reach the women who need it most. 💛

In this episode of The Reclamation Room, I’m talking about something called chronotrauma: the way trauma messes with our sense of time. If you’ve ever felt stuck in the past, trapped or restless in the present, or like future dreams might not even exist for you, you’re not alone. That’s what chronotrauma feels like.

The good news is, our brains are designed for change! Healing really is possible. And it doesn’t take giant leaps- it takes small, steady steps that add up over time.

Here’s what we’ll get into:

How trauma can distort the way we experience past, present, and future

What it looks like to actually map out your timeline for clarity

Simple tools to anchor yourself in the present when you feel stuck

Why resilience builds slowly, and why that’s a good thing

If you’ve ever wondered why time feels different after trauma, or how to reclaim your timeline so you can move forward, this one’s for you. 💛

And if something here lands for you, go ahead and hit subscribe or drop a rating! It helps this little corner of the internet find the people who need it most. Thanks for being here.

References mentioned in this episode:

⁠The Body Keeps the Score⁠

⁠My Weekly Women's Call⁠

A few of the articles I mentioned in my research:

⁠Example 1⁠

⁠Example 2⁠

⁠Example 3

In this episode of The Reclamation Room, I’m joined by my dear friend Melissa Yates, who so beautifully and bravely shares parts of her story and what’s helped her along the path of healing after narcissistic abuse and emotional trauma.

This conversation is raw, real, and full of heart. We talk about what it means to choose a different path than the one modeled by your abusers, how honesty can be one of the deepest forms of love, and why suppressing anger can quietly show up as illness in the body.

We also explore:

How writing and creative expression can be deeply cathartic

Why therapy can look like so much more than just talking

The ways past relationships can shape our current patterns

What it means to stay compassionate without self-abandoning

A few gentle, healthy coping tools to lean on as you heal

And the reminder that rebuilding is a choice — and it starts with a single step

Melissa’s story is such a powerful reminder that healing isn’t linear, and you don’t have to have it all figured out to start. If you’ve ever felt stuck, alone, or unsure where to even begin, this conversation is for you. 💛

Links mentioned in this episode:

⁠Melissa's blog⁠

Check out my ⁠weekly Women's support call⁠, held every Tuesday evening

If you found something here that resonated, go ahead and tap subscribe and drop a quick rating — it helps this little corner of the internet reach more hearts who need it. Thanks for listening!

In this episode of The Reclamation Room, I’m joined by my dear friend Melissa Yates, who so beautifully and bravely shares parts of her story and what’s helped her along the path of healing after narcissistic abuse and emotional trauma.

This conversation is raw, real, and full of heart. We talk about what it means to choose a different path than the one modeled by your abusers, how honesty can be one of the deepest forms of love, and why suppressing anger can quietly show up as illness in the body.

We also explore:

• How writing and creative expression can be deeply cathartic

• Why therapy can look like so much more than just talking

• The ways past relationships can shape our current patterns

• What it means to stay compassionate without self-abandoning

• A few gentle, healthy coping tools to lean on as you heal

• And the reminder that rebuilding is a choice — and it starts with a single step

Melissa’s story is such a powerful reminder that healing isn’t linear, and you don’t have to have it all figured out to start. If you’ve ever felt stuck, alone, or unsure where to even begin, this conversation is for you. 💛

Links mentioned in this episode:

Melissa's blog

Join my ⁠free weekly women’s call⁠ on Tuesdays to go deeper and experience live coaching. We also have a ⁠private community ⁠where the conversation continues.

If you found something here that resonated, go ahead and tap subscribe and drop a quick rating — it helps this little corner of the internet reach more hearts who need it. Thanks for listening!

Hey friends! In this episode, I’m diving into something every woman healing from narcissistic abuse or tough pasts needs to hear. Those “safe vs. unsafe” relationship tips online? They’re helpful, but they can mess with your head.. especially when someone turns them against you or you start questioning if you’re the problem.

I’m sharing a simple, powerful way to cut through the confusion and trust yourself again. No overthinking, no labels, just you and your gut. Tune in to learn how to spot what’s right (or wrong) for you in relationships and why that’s the key to reclaiming your power.

Key Takeaways:

* “Safe vs. unsafe” lists don’t always tell the full story.

* Your gut knows when something’s off—trust it.

* Healthy communication is about mutual understanding.

* Authentic sharing can reduce superficial oversharing.

* Labels can complicate emotional experiences.

* What you can do in the moment and as you're healing looking back.

Links Mentioned:

Learn more about trauma recovery coaching at ⁠yournorthstarrising.com⁠

Join our weekly call for support and community: ⁠yournorthstarrising.com/weekly-womens-circle⁠

If this episode resonates with you, please take a moment to rate and review The Reclamation Room. Your support helps amplify these conversations and makes it easier for others on their healing journey to find us.

Thanks for listening!

In this episode of The Reclamation Room, I sit down with Margaret, a therapist-turned-dating coach who helps women break free from the cycle of dating the same type of guy over and over again.

We dig into why so many of us get stuck in toxic relationship patterns, how childhood experiences shape who we’re drawn to, and what it takes to finally choose differently. From nervous system regulation to spotting red flags early, this conversation is packed with tools for anyone who’s tired of repeating the same painful dynamics and ready to step into healthier love.

Margaret and I also talk about the messy, beautiful work of self-reclamation: building boundaries, strengthening self-worth, and finding peace after narcissistic abuse.

Key Takeaways:

Healing from narcissistic abuse starts with recognizing patterns.

Therapy and coaching can be game-changers in recovery.

Nervous system regulation helps us break the cycle and feel safe again.

Boundaries aren’t optional—they’re the foundation of healthy relationships.

Childhood experiences influence who we’re drawn to as adults.

We can get dopamine hits from healthy activities, not just toxic highs.

Red flags are easier to spot once we slow down and pay attention.

The empath–narcissist dynamic is real, but awareness creates change.

Self-worth is non-negotiable when it comes to love and dating.

You don’t have to wait until you’ve “escaped” to ask for help.

Links mentioned in this episode:

Book: ⁠How to Break Your Addiction to a Person⁠

Margaret's Websites:

⁠mscounselingonline.com⁠

⁠healingtostrength.com⁠

If you’ve ever asked yourself, “Why do I keep ending up with the same kind of guy?” — this conversation is for you. Tune in to hear fresh insight, practical tools, and the hope that real change is possible.

If this episode resonates with you, please take a moment to rate and review The Reclamation Room. Your support helps amplify these conversations and makes it easier for others on their healing journey to find us.

Thanks for listening!

Quitting caffeine wasn’t just about breaking up with coffee for me. It mirrored the same cycles I had to break in healing from narcissistic abuse.

The constant back-and-forth. The quick dopamine hit that made me feel like my needs were being met, even though underneath it was wrecking my body and my peace. The way it became a false “comfort” that actually kept me stuck in the very cycles I was trying to escape.

In this episode, I share my story of letting go of caffeine and how it became a practice ground for breaking toxic loops, learning self-awareness, and choosing real nourishment instead of empty fixes.

We’ll explore: ✨ How addiction cycles mimic the trauma bond in narcissistic abuse ✨ The illusion of safety vs. the reality of hidden harm ✨ Why we return to what hurts us (and how to stop) ✨ The power of replacing false peace with real healing practices ✨ Celebrating small steps as proof you’re breaking free

This isn’t just a story about caffeine! It’s about reclaiming your power, refusing to settle for bandaid solutions, and choosing freedom over false tranquility.

Books mentioned in this episode:

Who Am I? The 16 Basic Desires That Motivate Our Actions and Define Our Personalities

(I mispronounced his name in this episode - Steven Reiss is credited for the Reiss Motivation Profile if you want to learn more!)

Caffeine Blues: Wake Up to the Hidden Dangers of America's #1 Drug

You can email me at [email protected] to register for our Weekly Women's Circle or to apply to be on the show!

thanks for listening 🧡