This week on The Schmear, we're kicking things off with a listener story so unbelievable it sounds made up: a hankering for Chinese food allegedly led to a car accident. You read that correctly.

From there, Alyssa and Hailey swap travel horror stories that might convince you to stay home forever. We're talking blood on the walls of an Airbnb, lost luggage disasters, mid-flight vomiting incidents, and enough vacation trauma to last a lifetime.

The cousins also dive into the latest season of Black Mirror, attempt to process the unexpected Kelis and Bill Murray dating rumors, celebrate the Denver Nuggets' championship win, and discuss the newest threat to The Schmear's podcast empire: Peppa Pig.

Travel nightmares, questionable life choices, pop culture chaos, and one very unfortunate Chinese food craving—just another week at The Schmear.

Let's chive! 🥯✨

Before you press play, we have one request: if you don't know what a dingleberry is, please do a quick search and report back. Trust us—you're going to need the context.

This week on The Schmear, Aly B and Hailey tackle the biggest cultural tragedies of our time, starting with Frank Ocean dropping out of Coachella Weekend 2 and sending the internet into a full-blown meltdown. The cousins also break down the chaotic Love Is Blind "live" reunion disaster, swap nail salon horror stories that may have you reconsidering your next appointment, and somehow find their way into several other questionable conversations.

From pop culture catastrophes to beauty appointment trauma and one very important dingleberry discussion, this episode is a rollercoaster from start to finish.

Let's chive!