The Steph & Craig Show

Are you aware of your attachment style? Are you anxious? Do you have an avoidant attachment style?

On today's episode, Steph and Craig are discussing all things attachment styles. The conversation centers around a post from social media that caught their attention.

The post is by Dr. Nicole LePera, the Holistic Psychologist, and breaks down how securely attached people act in relationships. Check out the post here- http://www.instagram.com/p/C9704FSvPjt/?igsh=MTJtaGNzamtkbTgweg==

Steph and Craig explore what secure attachment looks like and where they're getting it right, as well as, where they're getting it wrong.

It's an honest conversation about the spectrum of attachment styles and how differently they can show up over the course of your life.

Steph and Craig talk about the challenges they've both experienced on their journey to becoming securely attached, the role of communication and boundaries, and the need to take responsibility for your own behavior.

Tune in to hear Steph and Craig's insights on building a healthy, evolving relationship through open communication, self-awareness, and a willingness to work on attachment styles.

Connect with Steph & Craig:

Watch the episodes on YouTube-https://www.youtube.com/@stephandcraig/?sub_confirmation=1

Follow Steph & Craig on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/stephandcraig

Steph & Craig on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/steph.and.craig/

Steph & Craig on TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@stephandcraig

Sign up for Steph & Craig's newsletter- https://www.stephandcraig.co/

Disclaimer:

We're just sharing our journey with you. We're not licensed therapists, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Cool? Good deal. We'll see you soon.

In this episode:

00:00 Understanding Attachment Styles

13:15 The Journey to Secure Attachment

25:27 Recognizing the Importance of Needs

32:17 Expressing Authenticity in Relationships

46:43 Building a Life with Mutual Need Meeting

47:09 Fear of Being Alone

55:32 Drama-Free Relationships

58:08 Understanding and Trusting Others

01:03:41 Taking Responsibility for Behavior

01:09:55 Boundaries and Valuing Self

Expect the best. Plan for the greatest.

On today's episode Steph and Craig are breaking down your answers to the question,"What does society get wrong when it comes to relationships?"

They explore topics such as the idea that relationships should last forever, the stigma around divorce, the pressure to be in a relationship, and the notion of not going to bed angry.

They challenge the idea that good relationships should be easy and highlight the importance of working through challenges together.

They also address the belief that the end of a relationship signifies failure, emphasizing that relationships can be for a reason, a season, or for a lifetime.

Tune in to hear Steph and Craig debunk outdated relationship myths and offer fresh insights into building a healthy, evolving relationship.

Connect with Steph & Craig:

Watch the episodes on YouTube-https://www.youtube.com/@stephandcraig/?sub_confirmation=1

Follow Steph & Craig on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/stephandcraig

Steph & Craig on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/steph.and.craig/

Steph & Craig on TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@stephandcraig

Sign up for Steph & Craig's newsletter- https://www.stephandcraig.co/

Disclaimer:

We're just sharing our journey with you. We're not licensed therapists, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Cool? Good deal. We'll see you soon.

In this episode:

00:00 Redefining Healthy Relationships: The Myth of Easy

19:41 Embracing the Evolution: Relationships as Seasons

26:07 Prioritizing Connection: The Importance of Communication

32:17 Letting Go of Expectations: Embracing the Natural Evolution

39:44 Challenging the Idea of Forever

48:18 Embracing Connection as the Meaning of Life

53:09 Eliminating the Shame Around Divorce

01:03:00 The Importance of Emotional Regulation

01:12:23 Navigating Relationships with Narcissistic Traits

Expect the best. Plan for the greatest.

Are you getting your needs met in your relationship? Do you even know what to ask for?

On today's episode, Steph & Craig welcome Tony Overbay to the podcast. Tony is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and host of the Virtual Couch Podcast and Waking up to Narcissism Podcast.

This episode is overflowing with information regarding narcissism, emotional immaturity, differentiation, codependency, and so much more.

Tony discusses the difference between emotional immaturity and narcissism, arguing that emotional immaturity is a more practical label that doesn't carry the same heavy connotations, allowing for personal growth.

He introduces the concept of differentiation, which involves maintaining a sense of self while being connected to others.

Tony also shares his four pillars of a connected conversation, which include:

- Giving the benefit of the doubt

- Avoiding telling someone they're wrong

- Seeking to understand before being understood

- Staying present

Get ready for insights into emotional maturity, differentiation, and the path to healthier relationships!

Connect with Steph & Craig:

Watch the episodes on YouTube-https://www.youtube.com/@stephandcraig/?sub_confirmation=1

Follow Steph & Craig on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/stephandcraig

Steph & Craig on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/steph.and.craig/

Steph & Craig on TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@stephandcraig

Sign up for Steph & Craig's newsletter- https://www.stephandcraig.co/

Disclaimer:

We're just sharing our journey with you. We're not licensed therapists, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Cool? Good deal. We'll see you soon.

In this episode:

00:00 Differentiating Emotional Immaturity and Narcissism

10:14 The Power of Differentiation

23:04 The Four Pillars of a Connected Conversation

30:32 The Importance of Self-Care and Self-Validation

34:41 The Dance of Validation and Autonomy

36:00 Embracing Uncertainty and Discomfort for Growth

38:22 Self-Soothing and Managing Anxiety in Relationships

43:36 Navigating Codependency and Emotional Maturity

51:37 Asking for What We Need in Relationships

01:09:52 Challenges of Validation in a Relationship

01:11:20 Journey of Differentiation and Personal Growth

01:14:14 The Need for External Validation

01:17:30 Creating a Shared Experience

01:30:16 Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)

01:41:40 Living According to Personal Values

Connect with Tony:

Tony's Website- https://www.tonyoverbay.com/

Follow Tony on YouTube- https://www.youtube.com/@TheVirtualCouchPodcast

Listen to Tony's Podcasts-https://www.tonyoverbay.com/category/podcast/

Follow Tony on TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@virtualcouch

Tony on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/virtualcouch/

Check out Tony on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/tonyoverbaylmft/

Expect the best. Plan for the greatest.

Do you ever catch yourself saying, "A part of me feels…", or "A part of me thinks…?" If so, you're in for a treat today.

On this episode, Steph and Craig are joined by Natalie Deering, a licensed mental health therapist who specializes in working with individuals with complex trauma and anxiety using Internal Family Systems therapy (IFS).

Natalie explains the origins of IFS and how she integrates it into her work, breaking down the different parts within us—protector parts and wounded parts—and discussing how they manifest as manager and firefighter parts.

Steph and Craig share their personal experiences with parts work, highlighting the role IFS has played in their healing journey.

Natalie also emphasizes the importance of connecting to the body, explaining how she blends IFS and somatic therapy to enhance the healing process.

Natalie guides Craig through some parts work as well, allowing you to witness firsthand how it works.

It's a deep dive into all things IFS. Get ready to meet your parts!

Connect with Steph & Craig:

Watch the episodes on YouTube-https://www.youtube.com/@stephandcraig/?sub_confirmation=1

Follow Steph & Craig on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/stephandcraig

Steph & Craig on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/steph.and.craig/

Steph & Craig on TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@stephandcraig

Sign up for Steph & Craig's newsletter- https://www.stephandcraig.co/

Disclaimer:

We're just sharing our journey with you. We're not licensed therapists, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Cool? Good deal. We'll see you soon.

In this episode:

00:00 Introduction to Parts and Protectors

14:43 The Origins and Evolution of Internal Family Systems

19:04 Understanding the Internal Family Systems Model

26:45 Applying IFS to Complex Trauma and Anxiety

34:58 Introduction to Parts Work

45:06 Understanding the Roles of Protector Parts and Wounded Parts

51:41 The Transformative Power of Self-Love and Compassion

56:07 Healing Negative Self-Talk and Shame through Parts Work

01:06:04 Cultivating Self-Compassion and Understanding with IFS Therapy

01:15:05 The Power of Somatic Awareness in Healing Anxiety

01:28:25 Understanding Dissociation as a Part within the IFS Framework

01:35:24 Exploring the Interconnection between the Nervous System and Parts of the Self

01:39:29 Integrating IFS Therapy and Somatic Practices for Deep Healing

Connect with Natalie:

Listen to Natalie's podcast- https://www.ndwellnessservices.com/podcast

Follow Natalie on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/nataliedeering/

Natalie's Website- https://www.ndwellnessservices.com/

Expect the best. Plan for the greatest.

Are you stuck in a constant state of hypervigilance? Are you concerned about what it's doing to your body?

Today, Steph & Craig are joined by Melissa Romano, founder of Reclaiming Healthy, an online initiative designed to help you reconnect with your body and find true wellness.

In this episode, Melissa shares her insights on the impact of trauma and how it can affect your relationship with yourself and your body. She discusses the importance of unlearning harmful patterns and beliefs, trusting your instincts and emotions, and embracing self-awareness and self-compassion.

Melissa opens up about her personal journey and struggles with healing from a lifetime of repressed trauma and how she moves through life today in a completely different way.

Melissa is a breath of fresh air and breaks down the somatic experience of healing in a way that will light up things inside of you. For example, how she managed to reprogram her brain to start seeing signs of safety instead of always searching for signs of danger.

If you're struggling on your path right now, this ones for you.

Connect with Steph & Craig:

Watch the episodes on YouTube-https://www.youtube.com/@stephandcraig/?sub_confirmation=1

Follow Steph & Craig on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/stephandcraig

Steph & Craig on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/steph.and.craig/

Steph & Craig on TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@stephandcraig

Sign up for Steph & Craig's newsletter- https://www.stephandcraig.co/

Disclaimer:

We're just sharing our journey with you. We're not licensed therapists, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Cool? Good deal. We'll see you soon.

In this episode:

00:00 Introduction and Personal Experiences with Dissociation

02:59 Reclaiming a Healthy Connection with the Body

06:22 The Journey to Somatic Body and Yoga Therapy

10:03 The Importance of Feeling and Being Present

13:21 Unlearning Harmful Patterns and Trusting Our Instincts

17:19 Intentional Living and Carving New Paths

21:30 Navigating Healing in an Activated State

25:43 The Power of Intention and Unintentional Patterns

31:29 Connecting with the Body's Wisdom and Instincts

35:04 Unlearning Fear and Shame to Trust Ourselves

38:00 Finding Healthy Ways to Express Emotions

38:54 Micro Muscle Movements and Surprising Results

41:18 Completing the Survival Response

45:50 Trauma and Physical Pain

52:36 The Power of Self-Regulation

01:06:20 Authenticity on Social Media and the Reclaiming Healthy Initiative

Connect with Melissa:

Follow Melissa on TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@reclaimingmelissa

Check out Melissa on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/reclaimingmelissa

Melissa's Website- https://www.reclaiminghealthy.com/

Melissa on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/reclaimingmelissa

Follow Melissa on YouTube- https://www.youtube.com/@reclaiminghealthy

Expect the best. Plan for the greatest.

Are you struggling in the aftermath of infidelity? Are you searching for ways to heal and rebuild trust? If so, you're going to want to listen to today's episode.

Steph & Craig are joined by Michelle Mays, a Licensed Professional Counselor and author of The Betrayal Bind, How to Heal When the Person You Love the Most Hurts You the Worst.

Michelle has developed a groundbreaking approach to help betrayed partners navigate their healing journey.

In this episode, she shares profound insights on the nature of betrayal and the types of core wounds it inflicts: attachment injury, emotional and psychological injury, and sexual injury.

She also breaks down how infidelity can lead to carried shame, where the betrayed partner feels undeserved shame, and offers strategies to release this misplaced burden.

She delves into the role of attachment in both infidelity and addiction, showing how individuals might use sex to regulate their emotions and meet attachment needs.

The discussion also addresses common misconceptions surrounding infidelity, such as the unjust blame placed on betrayed partners and the erroneous belief that infidelity always ties to sex addiction.

Michelle refutes the notion that "once a cheater, always a cheater," stressing that meaningful change is possible with self-reflection and committed effort.

Today's episode is a powerful one and offers up a message of hope and inspiration that healing from infidelity is possible.

Connect with Steph & Craig:

Watch the episodes on YouTube-https://www.youtube.com/@stephandcraig/?sub_confirmation=1

Follow Steph & Craig on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/stephandcraig

Steph & Craig on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/steph.and.craig/

Steph & Craig on TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@stephandcraig

Sign up for Steph & Craig's newsletter- https://www.stephandcraig.co/

Disclaimer:

We're just sharing our journey with you. We're not licensed therapists, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Cool? Good deal. We'll see you soon.

In this episode:

00:00 Understanding Carried Shame

03:09 Misconceptions About Infidelity

08:18 Distinguishing Infidelity and Sex Addiction

16:45 The Role of Attachment in Infidelity and Addiction

29:06 Releasing Carried Shame

33:18 Misconceptions About Infidelity and Relationships

33:47 Challenging Misconceptions about Infidelity

35:13 Infidelity as a Relationship Problem

38:32 The Phases of Healing After Infidelity

41:21 Navigating the Push-Pull Dynamic

56:39 Recognizing Green Flags in the Healing Journey

Connect with Michelle:

Follow Michelle on YouTube- https://www.youtube.com/c/MichelleMaysChannel/?sub_confirmation=1

Check out Michelle on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/michellemays_/

Michelle's Website- https://michellemays.com

Michelle on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/OfficialMichelleMays/

Michelle's book, The Betrayal Bind- https://michellemays.com/book

Expect the best. Plan for the greatest.

Is your internal dialogue negative or positive? Do the beliefs you hold about yourself uplift you, or are they toxic and self-defeating? If you struggle with negative self-talk, this episode is for you.

Today, Steph & Craig dive deep into the world of self-talk and the powerful impact it has on your life. They break down the negative thoughts and toxic self-beliefs that everyone experiences, reminding you that you're not alone in your shame.

In this episode, Steph & Craig explore their personal battles with negative self-talk and trace the roots of these harmful beliefs. They discuss practical strategies and tools that have helped them shift to a more positive and empowering internal dialogue.

They emphasize the importance of bringing awareness to the words you use every day and how words can shape your reality. You'll learn how to reprogram your brain to see and feel differently about who you are and your place in this world.

By the end of this episode, you'll be equipped with actionable insights and techniques to start reprogramming your self-talk and building a more positive self-image.

Connect with Steph & Craig:

Watch the episodes on YouTube-https://www.youtube.com/@stephandcraig/?sub_confirmation=1

Follow Steph & Craig on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/stephandcraig

Steph & Craig on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/steph.and.craig/

Steph & Craig on TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@stephandcraig

Sign up for Steph & Craig's newsletter- https://www.stephandcraig.co/

Disclaimer:

We're just sharing our journey with you. We're not licensed therapists, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Cool? Good deal. We'll see you soon.

In this episode:

00:00 The Dichotomy of Optimism and Pessimism

03:04 The Role of Ego in Self-Talk

06:30 Challenging and Replacing Negative Self-Talk

10:30 The Influence of Programming on Self-Talk

17:03 The Journey of Healing and Recognizing Worthiness

42:10 Reprogramming Negative Self-Talk

43:09 The Power of Positive Affirmations

46:30 Challenging Societal Pressure to Be Negative

54:36 Stopping as a Starting Point

01:02:30 Struggling with Believing Positive Affirmations

01:09:10 Choosing What to Program

01:14:47 Bringing Awareness to Self-Talk

01:19:55 Expecting the Best and Planning for the Greatest

Expect the best. Plan for the greatest.

On today's episode, Steph & Craig tackle a big issue in relationships: What's the difference between pointing out your partner's imperfections and things you'd like them to change vs. nagging them and trying to control them to become the partner you want?

They discuss how to see the difference between the two and how they navigate the fine line that can exist in this space.

Steph & Craig also discuss the significant role society has played in shaping their relationship and the roles they each play.

They also respond to a listener question regarding emotional monitoring.

Tune in and get ready because there's a good chance you're going to be activated and fired up by the end. Hopefully in a good way.

Connect with Steph & Craig:

Watch the episodes on YouTube-https://www.youtube.com/@stephandcraig/?sub_confirmation=1

Follow Steph & Craig on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/stephandcraig

Steph & Craig on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/steph.and.craig/

Steph & Craig on TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@stephandcraig

Sign up for Steph & Craig's newsletter- https://www.stephandcraig.co/

Disclaimer:

We're just sharing our journey with you. We're not licensed therapists, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Cool? Good deal. We'll see you soon.

In this episode:

00:00 Introduction: Emotional Monitoring and Healing Childhood Wounds

05:01 Creating a Safe Environment for Healing and Change

09:41 Reprogramming Thoughts: The Practice of Positive Affirmations

14:23 The Lifelong Journey of Healing and Change

33:09 The Importance of Accountability and Taking Responsibility

35:04 Recognizing the Impact of Childhood Programming

37:07 Healing Through Relationships

41:29 Exploring Dynamics of Household Chores and Societal Programming

Expect the best. Plan for the greatest.

What happens when your definition of love is codependency?

On today's episode, Steph & Craig discuss what came up for them after episode 18 with trauma expert Tim Fletcher.

If you haven't yet, be sure to go back and listen to the last episode, The Connection Between Complex Trauma, Codependency, & Narcissism with Tim Fletcher.

Steph & Craig share their big takeaways from the episode and what they've been processing since.

They also open up and share personal stories about their relationship and what it was like trying to navigate some of the most difficult and toxic times.

If you're struggling with codependency or trying to figure out how to make it still work after surviving really difficult things in your relationship, you're going to want to listen.

It's a raw and vulnerable episode discussing shame, narcissism, complex trauma, codependency, infidelity, childhood abuse, addiction, and so much more.

Join Steph & Craig as they share the reality of what it's really been like navigating these hard issues and what ended up helping them stay together in the end.

Connect with Steph & Craig:

Watch the episodes on YouTube-https://www.youtube.com/@stephandcraig/?sub_confirmation=1

Follow Steph & Craig on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/stephandcraig

Steph & Craig on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/steph.and.craig/

Steph & Craig on TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@stephandcraig

Sign up for Steph & Craig's newsletter- https://www.stephandcraig.co/

Disclaimer:

We're just sharing our journey with you. We're not licensed therapists, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Cool? Good deal. We'll see you soon.

In this episode:

00:00 Introduction and the Influence of Society on Love

18:36 Codependency and Complex Trauma in Relationships

26:18 The Dance Between Narcissism and Co-Narcissism

32:11 Addressing Personal Baggage and Childhood Wounds

34:20 Understanding the Fear of Abandonment

35:14 Patterns and Cycles in Codependent Relationships

38:26 Unconscious Behaviors and the Role of Trauma

45:08 Healing, Setting Boundaries, and Unpacking Baggage

50:44 The Addiction to Chaos and the Fear of Calmness

57:31 Understanding the Neurochemical Processes in Complex Trauma

01:04:58 Expecting the Best and Planning for the Greatest

Expect the best. Plan for the greatest.

Are you in a codependent relationship?

Are you stuck in toxic cycles of narcissism and co-narcissism?

If so, you're going to want to tune in to today's episode.

Steph & Craig welcome trauma expert, Tim Fletcher to the podcast. Tim is a pioneer in the addictions and Mental Health treatment profession and an expert on complex trauma. He is the founder and president of RE/ACT (Recovery Education for Addictions and Complex Trauma). He's also a counselor, a researcher, and a pastor.

Tim offers up a masterclass on complex trauma and its connection to codependency.

He breaks down how children who experience complex trauma in childhood will oftentimes have one parent or caregiver who is narcissistic or displays narcissistic traits and will in turn form a codependent relationship with that parent or caregiver.

Tim goes on to explain the cycles of codependent relationships, how addiction plays a role, what you can do if you find yourself in this type of relationship, and so much more.

Buckle up because there's a lot of information covered and you're going to want to catch it all.

Connect with Steph & Craig:

Watch the episodes on YouTube-https://www.youtube.com/@stephandcraig/?sub_confirmation=1

Follow Steph & Craig on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/stephandcraig

Steph & Craig on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/steph.and.craig/

Steph & Craig on TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@stephandcraig

Sign up for Steph & Craig's newsletter- https://www.stephandcraig.co/

Disclaimer:

We're just sharing our journey with you. We're not licensed therapists, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Cool? Good deal. We'll see you soon.

In this episode:

00:00 Understanding the Shame Spectrum

10:16 Exploring Codependency in Relationships

31:10 The Cycle of Codependent Relationships

33:32 Approaching Codependency and Narcissism with Compassion

34:58 The Dynamics of Codependent Relationships

36:16 Fluctuating Roles in Codependency

43:45 Differentiating Codependency from Healthy Love

48:14 The Influence of Childhood Experiences on Codependency

56:25 Understanding and Healing Codependency

01:04:36 The Role of Addiction in Codependency

01:07:42 The Connection Between Complex Trauma and Addiction

01:14:39 The Role of Self-Soothing and Coping Mechanisms

01:18:01 Understanding Codependency in Relationships

01:25:30 Breaking Free from Codependency

01:36:39 Creating Healthy, Interdependent Relationships

Connect with Tim:

Follow Tim on YouTube- https://www.youtube.com/@TimFletcher

Check out Tim on Instagram- https://www.instagram.com/timfletcherco/

Tim's Website- https://www.timfletcher.ca/

Tim on Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/TimFletcherCo/

Expect the best. Plan for the greatest.