The Topical

By The Onion

The Topical is the daily podcast from The Onion and Onion Public Radio, and the only podcast brave enough to ask: What if the news had sound effects? Join host Leslie Price each day as he barely scrat... more

4.6

14161,416 ratings

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FAQs about The Topical:

How many episodes does The Topical have?

The podcast currently has 258 episodes available.

The Topical episodes:

September 28, 2020 Disney World On Lockdown After Mickey Escapes Enclosure, Rampages Through Park
Hear what steps Disney workers are taking to keep parkgoers safe from the bloodthirsty beast.

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10min
September 25, 2020 Ornithologists Attribute Owls’ Nocturnal Lifestyle To Hard Cocaine Habit
Hear what led researchers to conclude that the bird of prey is absolutely gaga for booger sugar.

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8min
September 24, 2020 Real Estate Experts Confirm Having George Clooney Living In Attic Greatly Increases Property Value
It’s the simple and surefire way to increase the resale value of your home. We have everything you need to know before making the investment and adding the actor, director, and two-time Sexiest Man Alive.

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10min
September 23, 2020 Napkin Industry Under Fire For History Of Holding Greasy Slobs To Impossible Beauty Standards
After ongoing public outcry from body positivity experts, hear why many popular napkin brands are changing their messaging today and proclaiming that gravy-stained bodies are beautiful.

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10min
September 22, 2020 National Weather Service Warns Recent Snow-Cainado May Be Tied To Professor Barnabas T. Vile’s Weather Destabilizing Machine
Part blizzard, part hurricane, part tornado—all destruction. We have the latest on this unprecedented tsunami-hailstorm combination and why many experts believe it could be caused by the villainous Professor Vile and his weather-destabilizing machine.

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11min
September 21, 2020 Student Loan Debt Making It More Difficult For Millennials To Subscribe To The Topical’s Patreon Despite Incredibly Low-Priced Membership Tiers
Hear why many young professionals saddled with student loan debt are struggling to afford basic necessities, like early access to episodes and exclusive content, despite it being priced as low as $5 per month.

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10min
September 18, 2020 Girl Scout Troop Raises Over $100,000 To Buy Corvette Because Fuck It, It’s Their Money, They Can Do What They Want
Hear the heartwarming story of Troop 242, and why this year they decided to put their Girl Scout cookie proceeds to good use and buy a 2020 Corvette Stingray with a 6-liter V8 engine and 400-plus horsepower.

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9min
September 17, 2020 Diary Entries Reveal Benjamin Franklin’s Kite Experiment Was Early Attempt At Erotic Electrostimulation
On the anniversary of the signing of our nation’s Constitution, hear how the newly authenticated diary entries of Ben Franklin point to his revolutionary theory that electricity could be harnessed from lightning and trained to flow from the clouds to his erect penis, providing immense pleasure.

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9min
September 16, 2020 Nation Calls For Return Of Theme Songs That Explain Show’s Whole Deal
Americans stand united today in their call for television programs to go back to the days when all episodes began with a catchy tune and lyrics that explained the entire concept of the show and its characters.

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10min
September 15, 2020 NRA Issues ‘F’ Rating To Bugs Bunny For Tying Up Guns Into Pretzel Shape
Hear why the NRA believes Bugs Bunny’s long history of curtailing the Second Amendment rights of Elmer Fudd and Yosemite Sam by twisting their firearms in a big bow qualifies the cartoon rabbit for their lowest possible rating.

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7min

FAQs about The Topical:

How many episodes does The Topical have?

The podcast currently has 258 episodes available.

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