Connection. Connection can feel like a marriage buzzword—being the center of so many marriage questions and pieces of advice. How do we stay “connected?” Make sure you and your spouse are “connecting.” Keep your marriage “connection” strong. Tune into today’s episode with Dr. Greg and Erin Smalley. They are the cohosts of the podcast, “Crazy Little Thing Called Marriage,” a Focus on the Family original, and they’ve been married for over 30 years. They talk with Marlee Arnold about this buzzword—connection—and how it is achievable for your marriage. Additionally, with only a high school senior left at home and the empty nest years rapidly approaching, they provide wisdom related to preparing for this new season of marriage and talk about “how soon is ‘too soon’ to prepare.” It’s a great, practical, down-to-earth conversation you don’t want to miss.

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Time Stamps:

(1:30) The Smalley’s background

(3:17) 1-2 things that are top of mind when you think about “connection as a couple” 

(9:30) 1-2 personal examples of how the Smalleys have done well staying connected

(16:50) How have the Smalleys been preparing for the empty nest phase that is approaching

(31:43) How soon is “too soon” to be thinking about the empty nest

(38:50) How to approach the empty nest phase of marriage and the caring for aging parents phase of marriage well, simultaneously 

(44:49) One key takeaway from this conversation

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Links:

Crazy Little Thing Called Marriage https://podcasts.focusonthefamily.com/show/crazy-little-thing-called-marriage/

Focus Marriage Instagram https://www.instagram.com/focusmarriage/

Smalley Marriage https://www.smalleymarriage.com/

Focus on the Family https://www.focusonthefamily.com/

“Learn How To Make a Daily Difference in Your Marriage” https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/learn-how-to-make-a-simple-daily-difference-in-your-marriage/

“Marriage Expectations” https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/marriage-expectations/

“25 Ideas: How To Reconnect With Your Spouse” https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/25-things-to-do-to-reconnect-with-your-spouse/

“What To Talk About With Your Spouse To Reconnect” https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/what-to-talk-about-with-your-spouse-to-reconnect/

“How To Find a Marriage Counselor” https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/how-to-find-a-marriage-counselor/

WinShape Marriage Website https://marriage.winshape.org/

WinShape Marriage Instagram https://www.instagram.com/winshapemarriage/

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Relevant Episodes:

The Secret Ingredient To Staying Connected https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QdK9Mm-Qo4o&t=432s

The Truth Behind Marriage Expectations https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRc-G7VGnRo

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Money can be one of the biggest sources of tension in a marriage, but it doesn’t have to be. Ron Blue is a financial expert; he’s authored more than 20 books on personal finance from a biblical lens, devoting his life and career to helping Christians manage their finances so they have more to give away for the funding and fulfillment of The Great Commission. He joins Rob Philo on today’s episode of The WinShape Marriage Podcast to discuss common friction points couple face when discussing finances. According to Ron, when you bring two people together, with different personalities, values, and goals, to “balance one checkbook,” it’s no wonder money management can be challenging. However, Ron’s extensive personal and professional experience provide practical wisdom throughout this conversation, leaving couples with a greater understanding of how to align their finances with their faith and how to navigate talking about money throughout the duration of their marriage.

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Time Stamps:

(1:20) Ron Blue’s background

(3:50) Why Ron thinks finances are such a big friction point for many couples

(6:43) Advice for couples who feel uncomfortable talking about money 

(13:33) How couples can align their finances with their faith

(20:39) How Ron navigated the conversation around giving in his marriage

(25:30) Advice for couples who have a tight budget

(29:00) What are some big financial missteps couples make on a regular basis?

(32:43) How couples can navigate decision making around big financial decisions when they’re in different places

(1:00) One key takeaway from this conversation

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Links:

Ron Blue Institute https://ronblueinstitute.com/

“How To Talk About Finances Before Marriage” https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/how-to-talk-about-finances-before-marriage/

“How To Manage Finances in a Marriage” https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/how-to-manage-finances-in-a-marriage/

Gifting Money to Adult Children—What Do We Do? https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/gifting-money-to-adult-children-what-do-we-do/

WinShape Marriage Website https://marriage.winshape.org/

WinShape Marriage Instagram https://www.instagram.com/winshapemarriage/

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It’s not a question of “if” you and your spouse will experience hard seasons in your marriage but “when.” This isn’t meant to scare you—our desire is to come alongside you and your spouse now to help you build a strong foundation, so you’ll be resilient and capable of staying connected to one another even when you face challenges in your relationship. Chris and Jamie Bailey, Christian counselors and marriage coaches, join Rob Philo on today’s episode of The WinShape Marriage Podcast, providing insights around navigating difficulties alongside your spouse. Tune into this conversation—not because you're fearful but because you desire to be proactive and set you and your spouse up to be as successful as possible throughout the duration of your marriage.

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Time Stamps:

(:39) Chris and Jamie Bailey’s background

(1:11) The difference between a Christian marriage counselor and a Christian marriage coach

(4:20) In your experience, have you run into any couples who thought, “We are going to be completely fine,” and then, they get hit sideways?

(9:00) What are some side effects/signals people can look for to realize they are in a more challenging season?

(14:15) What was the dynamic like for you all (Chris and Jamie) trying to figure out each other and how you respond to stress?

(18:58) In a season that is stressful, how can couples stay connected?

(21:58) When it comes to bringing in an outside perspective, do you have any advice for someone who might be hesitant?

(26:15) What are some things you can be proactive about to set yourself up well when hard seasons come?

(31:22) How important is safety in your marriage?

(35:11) How important play is for your marriage, even outside of stressful seasons

(38:43) When you look back to where you were when you first got married, what is one piece of advice you would share with the younger version of yourself?

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Links:

Expedition Marriage https://expeditionmarriage.org/

“How To Find a Marriage Counselor” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/how-to-find-a-marriage-counselor/

“20 Good Games To Play With Your Spouse” https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/20-good-games-to-play-with-your-spouse/

WinShape Marriage Website https://marriage.winshape.org/

WinShape Marriage Instagram https://www.instagram.com/winshapemarriage/

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Relevant Episodes:

The SECRET Ingredient To Staying Connected in Marriage https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QdK9Mm-Qo4o&t=419s

How To Navigate Grief in Marriage | Laurie Lokey https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivswWSleOp0&t=1921s

Dealing With Stress and Anxiety in Marriage | Monique Wells https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7OncYeR3tpg&t=2014s

What Does It Mean To Have an Emotionally Safe Marriage? | Dr. Joshua Straub https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8B-49TnMw8&t=5s

Making Your Marriage Fun Again! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VjZQkSDz3UA&t=886s

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We’re deep into season three of The WinShape Marriage Podcast, sharing our third marriage story today. Tommy and Shonda Sharpe, a WinShape Marriage Host Couple, join Marlee Arnold for this impactful episode. First, they share a bit about their personal testimonies and relationships with Jesus—how He has met each of them in their own faith journeys. Then, they talk through how they met one another, what they have experienced in their marriage thus far, and how the Lord continues to meet with them presently as they walk hand in hand together. We pray that you’ll be blessed by this conversation.

Note: This conversation is focused on God’s redemptive power and building a healthy, thriving marriage. If you are experiencing abuse in your marriage, or someone you know is, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline. If you struggle with thoughts of suicide or self-harm, help and hope are available to you; please reach out to the National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.

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We haven’t done an official, generic Q&A since season one of The WinShape Marriage Podcast. So, we’re bringing it back today! There’s not a specific category or theme for today’s questions—just a little bit of everything—asked directly by you guys. We answer questions like, “How do we develop hobbies we would like to do together?”; “How do you overcome preconceived notions based on marriage examples you grew up with?”; “My spouse and I both want children, but people make it sound impossible and not worth it. Thoughts?”. If you’d like to hear thoughts from two people with two backgrounds but both with experience in marriage and family counseling, tune into today’s episode as they answer your marriage questions.

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Time Stamps:

(:25) Genee Francis’ and Jeremy Marshall’s backgrounds

(3:20) How do we prioritize time together while both of us have high stress, high time-consuming jobs?

(7:26) I struggle to have more of myself to give at the end of the workday. What do you recommend for making sure I still have room for my spouse?

(11:13) How do we play together when we like different things?

(14:55) How do we seek out or develop hobbies that we would like to do together?

(18:00) How do you overcome preconceived notions based on marriage examples you grew up with?

(20:04) How does having divorced parents affect the health and expectation of my marriage?

(21:55) I've heard from so many couples how hard parenting is. My spouse and I both want children, but people make it sound impossible and not worth it. Thoughts?

(29:25) What are your tips for a newly married couple who is expecting a baby sooner than they thought they would be? They have a fear of losing connection.

(33:59) Once children arrive, how do we stay connected to each other?

(39:26) How do we keep family opinions from influencing decisions together?

(45:05) My traditional Christian parents believe I should be submissive in my marriage rather than have an equal partnership. Am I wrong to disagree?

(49:38) When is it OK to go to marriage counseling? And what do you do if your spouse isn’t on the same page about getting help?

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Links:

“20 Good Games To Play With Your Spouse” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/20-good-games-to-play-with-your-spouse/

“Are We Ready for a Baby? 10 Questions To Ask Yourselves First” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/are-we-ready-for-a-baby/

“How To Find a Marriage Counselor” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/how-to-find-a-marriage-counselor/

WinShape Marriage Website https://marriage.winshape.org/

WinShape Marriage Instagram https://www.instagram.com/winshapemarriage/

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Relevant Episodes:

Making Your Marriage Fun Again! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VjZQkSDz3UA&t=886s

The SECRET Ingredient To Staying Connected in Marriage https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QdK9Mm-Qo4o&t=419s

How To Keep Your In-Laws From Becoming Out-Laws https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWSQcTmMYD0&t=1158s

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You’re on a marriage journey with your spouse, but for many of you, you’re also on a parenting journey. It’s one thing to keep God at the center of your marriage, but it can be another thing to disciple your children alongside your spouse. How do you journey along this life-giving, but often challenging, endeavor? On today’s episode of the WinShape Marriage Podcast, Marlee Arnold is joined by Amy Lowe, who brings her personal experience as a wife of almost 20 years and a mom to two teenagers. However, she also has professional expertise in this topic to boot since Amy oversees WinShape Camps for Girls and WinShape Camps for Families. She shares openly from her experience about how her and her husband practically disciple their children, make God a natural part of their family rhythms, and balance this endeavor with the role of the church and other resources like camp. If you’re a parent who desires for your kids to know and love Jesus, you’ll thoroughly enjoy this conversation.

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Time Stamps:

(:56) Amy Lowe’s background

(3:35) By definition, what does it mean to disciple your children?

(5:40) What are some practical and tangible examples of how you disciple your children?

(9:46) How do you and your spouse get on the same team/remain on the same team in this discipleship endeavor

(13:12) How do you talk to your kids about God

(16:07) How you have made God a natural part of your conversations and rhythms in your family

(21:04) Any advice for parents in this discipleship endeavor who came to know the Lord as adults or grew up in homes where God was sequestered to Sunday mornings and Wednesday evenings

(26:10) How do you balance what you’re doing in your home (discipling your children) versus what is being “outsourced”

(31:07) How do you pray with your kids

(33:49) What is the biggest prayer you find yourself praying for your kids

(35:36) One key takeaway from this conversation

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Links:

“The Jesus Storybook Bible” https://www.sallylloyd-jones.com/books/jesus-storybook-bible/

“How To Involve Kids in Prayer” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/how-to-involve-kids-in-prayer/

“How To Explain God to a Child” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/how-to-explain-god-to-a-child/

“Seven Simple Prayers To Pray for Your Spouse and Kids” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/seven-simple-prayers-to-pray-for-your-spouse-and-kids/

“Prayers for Adult Children” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/prayers-for-adult-children/ WinShape Camps Website https://camps.winshape.org/

WinShape Camps for Families https://camps.winshape.org/family-camps/

Carpool Conversations Podcast https://camps.winshape.org/carpool-conversations/

WinShape Marriage Website https://marriage.winshape.org/

WinShape Marriage Instagram https://www.instagram.com/winshapemarriage/

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Is “spiritual leader” in the Bible? What does spiritual leadership look like practically? What are some ways we can cultivate a relationship with God in our marriage? We’re going strong with our Q&A episodes—answering your questions! We want to talk about what you are asking about, so on today’s episode of The WinShape Marriage Podcast we unpack several questions related to faith in marriage with Jeremy Marshall, a favorite guest of y’all from last season. We talk through some of the “stickier” questions like understanding the terminology “spiritual leader,” providing insight into navigating seasons where you and your spouse aren’t on the same page in your faith walk, and really cultivating spiritual connectedness and intimacy in your marriage beyond the obvious—attending church and joining a small group. It’s a wonderful conversation that we pray blesses you and your marriage!

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Time Stamps:

(:50) Jeremy Marshall’s background

(2:12) Is “spiritual leader” in the Bible?

(5:43) What does spiritual leadership look like practically?

(11:50) How do you grapple through seasons where you and your spouse are in different places in your faith walk?

(15:10) For wives who want their husband to be more of a spiritual leader, what can they do?

(19:49) How to have connected spiritual life when you and your spouse both experience God differently

(26:15) What are some ways we can cultivate a relationship with God in our marriage?

(29:14) What should I be looking for in a good friend?

(31:22) How to best pray or read the Bible together and separately in marriage

(35:36) One key takeaway from this conversation

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Links:

“Seven Simple Prayers To Pray for Your Spouse and Kids” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/seven-simple-prayers-to-pray-for-your-spouse-and-kids/

WinShape Marriage Website https://marriage.winshape.org/

WinShape Marriage Instagram https://www.instagram.com/winshapemarriage/

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Relevant Episodes:

Is It OK To Connect With God Differently Than My Spouse? | Gary Thomas https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cinDyLNmFl0

Growing Your Relationship With God and Your Spouse in 2025 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcfI9tHeTh8&t=1401s

What Does Spiritual Leadership Mean, Anyway? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7g0T2-8izo&t=57s

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How do you bring up sensitive topics? How can you make each other still feel loved in conflict? How do you resolve conflict quickly? We pulled together a list of questions related to conflict in marriage, asked directly by you guys, and we’re going to tackle them on today’s episode of The WinShape Marriage Podcast. Eric Wooten, author, speaker, and cofounder of Altared Marriage, joins Rob Philo to address a slew of conflict-related questions, providing thoughtful responses and easy-to-implement strategies for your own marriage. For example, he shares this insight—validation is not a complete endorsement of your spouse’s perspective. Do you agree? Tune into today’s conversation to find out!

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Time Stamps:

(:45) Eric Wooten’s background

(2:04) My spouse doesn’t always communicate their feelings and can hold things back. How do I respectfully ask them to share their feelings in an argument?

(5:50) How can you tell the difference between a spouse that wants to help you become a better version of yourself versus one that tries to fix you?

(8:32) How do you bring up sensitive topics without them blowing up into a whole thing?

(11:03) What are your thoughts on addressing multiple issues at once in conflict?

(17:09) How can you make each other still feel loved in conflict?

(20:05) What’s the best way to start a conversation that you both know you need to have but neither wants to initiate?

(22:41) What does healthy conflict look like?

(28:15) When having conflict triggered by tones and quick reactions, how do you avoid responding impulsively?

(32:18) How do you resolve conflict quickly?

(34:28) How do you resolve a conflict that you both can’t come to an agreement on?

(41:08) One key takeaway from this conversation

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Links:

Altared Marriage https://www.altaredmarriage.com/

Valentine’s Day Getaway WinShape Marriage Retreat Feb. 13 – 15, 2026 https://marriage.winshape.org/retreat/valentines-day-getaway-february-2026/

Courageous Communication Marriage Retreat Oct. 30 – Nov. 1, 2026 https://marriage.winshape.org/retreat/courageous-communication-october-2026/

Courageous Communication Marriage Retreat Dec. 11 – 13, 2026 https://marriage.winshape.org/retreat/courageous-communication-december-2026/

“Conflict Resolution Strategies” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/conflict-resolution-strategies/

“How To Stop Arguing With Your Spouse” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/how-to-stop-arguing-with-your-spouse/ 

“Is It OK To Agree To Disagree With Your Spouse?” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/is-it-ok-to-agree-to-disagree-with-my-spouse/ 

“Four Steps To Repairing Conflict With Your Spouse” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/4-steps-to-repairing-conflict/ 

WinShape Marriage Website https://marriage.winshape.org/

WinShape Marriage Instagram https://www.instagram.com/winshapemarriage/

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Relevant Episodes:

Don’t Fall for These 7 Marriage Myths About Conflict https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFQrzCRVH1E&t=11s

How To Have Better Arguments With Your Spouse https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mdfGBQ-yU7s&t=342s

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How do I initiate sex when I struggle to find a starting point? What are your thoughts on two people with busy schedules scheduling when to have sex? How is romance defined? We’re answering these questions and more—asked directly from you guys—on today’s episode of The WinShape Marriage Podcast. One of your favorite guests returns and joins Marlee Arnold for the Q&A. Dr. Juli Slattery is a clinical psychologist, and she’s the president of Authentic Intimacy, a teaching ministry devoted to reclaiming God’s design for sexuality. Her wisdom and expertise is top-notch, which is exactly why we asked her to answer your questions related to sex and intimacy in marriage. More important than her own perspective, Dr. Slattery brings a biblical perspective to this vulnerable conversation we know you’ll appreciate.

Note: This conversation is focused on building a healthy, thriving marriage. If you are experiencing abuse in your marriage, or someone you know is, contact the National Hotline for Domestic Abuse. If someone is monitoring your device, call the hotline 24/7 at 1−800−799−7233. Learn more about what defines an abusive relationship.

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Time Stamps:

(1:09) Dr. Juli Slattery’s background

(3:10) How is romance defined, and what is a good way to cultivate it in my marriage?

(7:10) How do you navigate preparing for marriage when you and your fiancé have different levels of desire and/or excitement for intimacy?

(11:37) How do I initiate sex when I struggle to find a starting point?

(16:25) Is it OK to keep lifelong friends of the opposite sex when getting married?

(19:52) What are your thoughts pertaining to oral sex, and does it go both ways?

(23:06) What are your thoughts on two people with busy schedules scheduling when to have sex?

(24:59) How do I get over the shame of having sex with my spouse before marriage and not letting that shame carry over into married sex?

(28:01) How can we talk about porn in our marriage and how to guard against it?

(31:42) What do I do if my spouse told me that they are struggling with porn?

(34:12) Where do you suggest starting with regaining trust after discovering a spouse’s porn addiction, and how do you work on moving forward?

(37:45) One key takeaway from this conversation

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Links:

Authentic Intimacy https://www.authenticintimacy.com/

“God, Sex, and Your Marriage” https://shop.authenticintimacy.com/products/god-sex-and-your-marriage

God, Sex, and Your Marriage WinShape Marriage Retreat Jan. 23 – 25, 2026 https://marriage.winshape.org/retreat/god-sex-and-your-marriage-january-2026/

God, Sex, and Your Marriage WinShape Marriage Retreat Aug. 14 – 16, 2026 https://marriage.winshape.org/retreat/god-sex-and-your-marriage-august-2026/

Pure Desire Ministries https://www.puredesire.org/

Be Broken https://www.bebroken.org/

423 Communities https://www.423communities.org/

“Sex and Intimacy in Marriage: Six Questions Answered” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/sex-and-intimacy-in-marriage-six-questions-answered/ 

“Can You Have Opposite-Sex Friendships in Marriage?” blog https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/opposite-sex-friendships-in-marriage/ 

WinShape Marriage Website https://marriage.winshape.org/

WinShape Marriage Instagram https://www.instagram.com/winshapemarriage/

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Relevant Episodes:

God’s Design for Sex in Marriage | Dr. Juli Slattery https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mY5u0EL6HzI&t=820s

Intimacy Is More Than Just Sex | Dr. Juli Slattery https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-Ky8vS5aWo&t=820s

Should You Have Friends of the Opposite Sex? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xzwG1vpQuyc&t=248s

What Does Research Say About Pornography? | Nick Stumbo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=flZJ-kSWfiY&t=2746s

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We’re back in the new year and starting off strong sharing a second marriage story! Despite what you may think, you and your spouse have a marriage story—one worth reflecting on and considering sharing. Be inspired by Phillip and Whitney Gable, a WinShape Marriage Host Couple, as they share their marriage story on today’s episode of The WinShape Marriage Podcast. They talk openly and vulnerably about how the Lord captivated each of their hearts, ultimately leading to transformation in their marriage. There isn’t a nice, neat bow at the end of this episode—instead an encouragement that God is still working and still writing their story, even in the present. How is he doing the same for you?

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Links:

Marriage Discipleship https://marriage.winshape.org/discipleship/

WinShape Marriage Website https://marriage.winshape.org/

WinShape Marriage Instagram https://www.instagram.com/winshapemarriage/

Wild At Heart – For Men https://wildatheart.org/events/wild-at-heart-retreat 

Wild At Heart – For Women https://wildatheart.org/events/captivating-retreat 

Wild At Heart Retreat Men April 16 – 19, 2026 Cleveland, Georgia https://lifeimpact.com/wahr/ 

Wild At Heart Retreat Women April 16 – 19, 2026 Cleveland, Georgia https://lifeimpact.com/captivating/ 

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Relevant Episodes:

A Marriage Story: The Robys https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OXYJcpoRH0Q&t=2s

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