This week things are starting to get really unhealthy.... and we're not just talking about the Spiceman's weight.

It's a very special, very speedy edition of the only podcast that gives the president the benefit of the doubt as the all powerful Orbs decree that we must!

Like blind cave fish swimming toward the light, this week the gang struggles toward inescapable realizations such as:

- Freewill is most likely an illusion

- Dennis Rodman is most likely a pan-sexual super spy

- 80% of all life on earth are most likely moochers

- jeff sessions is most definitely a racist

All this, plus the birth and almost immediate corruptions of Artificial Orbtelligence, live on the carn-cast!

This week:

Luke skypes in from the Nation's Capitol thanks to a journalistic impulse to cover the Comey testimony. Aided by lack of sleep and an adderall binge, Luke meets Comey's law professor friend and street ball teammate [name redacted]

In addition to expert insights and analysis of Comey's testimony, the gang discusses the latest vicious slanders against our President, courtesy of the lugenpresser, accusing our Orange Julius Caesar of ripping off cancer charities and not caring about the environment.

And also Carnie Mail from a former FBI agent, and more

This week the gang dances around the word that would come to take over all headlines. Aside from that there's plenty of:

-Montenegro Push Talk

- Marveling at the POTUS's Fitness, both mental AND physical

- The effects of Orbs on Balls

All this plus- COVFEFE! Though they never speak it aloud- they do discuss its secret meaning. Can you catch it?

This week the fellas pack their bags to take the carnage on a world tour (by which we mean talk about a few other specific parts of the world) Highlights include:

- Receiving a deeply blasphemous postcard.

- Presidential legal advice.... for a Japanese pop star.

- Making abundantly clear that the Terror Squad are NOT losers.

All this AND a pair of testicles becoming imbued with an ancient sentient magic. Join in for a ball humming good time.

This week the Carnal Kings discuss every up to the moment development and deviation from the historical norm, including:

- The exact moment private parts become public

- The "Blow Heard 'Round the World"

- President Hon' Don John's daring plan to smoke out leakers in the White House

All this PLUS an audio tape purchased Bernie Madoff style with hypothetical money that turns out not to exist!

The week the Carnie Crew glosses right over the potential of nihilism in the oval office, pauses briefly to discuss Joe’s surprising plan for a sexual lottery, listens in wonder as Luke manages to drop his mic onto the controls of the musical sting, and finally lands firmly on the news sensations that’s sweeping the nation:

-The

-Sacking

-Of

-James

-Comey

All this PLUS a check in form Tim’s horrible new pen pal!

Join the gang for a dual centennial celebration, marking President Don John's 100 days on our 100th show*

Also this week we:

- answer listener questions

- enlist the explanatory power of Norse mythology to understand contemporary american politics

- interpret exclusive leaked audio from the Harrisburg rally

*factcheck: this is episode 13

This week the gang savors the last few days of President Don-Jon’s first 100 days:

- Bidding good-byely to O’Reilly

- Delving into the deeply counter-intuitive strategies of the DNC

- Listening in on a solemn Oval Office ceremony

- Celebrating the triumphant, scientifically impossible flight of the American Bumblebee and spirit.

All this, PLUS the frosty disapproval of the nation’s stern father figure’s stern father figure, and MORE!

The gang takes on the Trump admin's many dizzying moves during the Easter/Passover Holy Week, including big T's embrace of a most delectable, moist, amazing chocolate cake. You've never seen a cake so delicious. Just perfect...And also unilaterally bombing two sovereign nations, removing student loan regulations, and much much more!