This Show Has Everything

"You're all liars!" That was Jen's message in 2009 to Tens who assured her night guards are fine. Well, they're not, and LRB is putting the system on trial: we're taking the dental industry to Night Guard Court. In this month's Phyllis Phave, Meredith and Phyllis recount their histories with night guards, bite splints, retainers and other humbling dental apparatuses. So suck up that saliva, admit your lack of sex appeal and grind that piece of plastic into a fine dust as we look back on Luke and Jen's failed attempts to improve their bites in their sleep.

From the TBTL archives: Feb 5, 2009 (ep 261) Apr 7, 2010 (ep 532, archived by HistoriTen Colleen Rozillis)

Shout-out to Linh Pham's marsupialgurgle.com for audio spackle between clips.

BONUS: See if you catch Phyllis' math error before she does!

Mike, Meredith and Bobby are DTP—that’s “down to pod”—and heading over to the mercado for a muy caliente deal on limes before recapping the latest week of TBTL, but only after taco talk, and taking a tour of the greatest consolation party ever dreamed in the theatre of the mind.

All four of our economical and efficient Toyota cylinders are fired up and there’s a seat left open for you, so climb in, hold tight, and make sure you only use the towel with the Karen Pence “Adam and Eve, Not Adam and Steve” charm on it, because there’s no telling where the others have been.

March is #trypod month! (As if you didn’t already know.) In that spirit, we at Little Red Bandwagon have compiled clips of some of our favorite non-TBTL podcasts to expand your horizons, along with a little background on why we love them. Join Ann and Bobby for this special tour through our wide-ranging tastes. And when you’re done, find a luddite, and teach him or her how to download a podcast, because sharing is caring! 

Here are our picks with each series’ title, followed by the episode or segment, and timestamps for the clip, in case you want to seek them out. (Or, skip past them. You do you.) Bobby: Crimetown (Ep. 1, Divine Providence) 3:35 to 16:10 Ann: Crime Writers On… (Tickled) 21:00 to 29:06 Meredith: Adventure Zone (Here There Be Gerblins) 32:10 to 36:47 Be sure to check out the animation! Christy: Anna Faris is Unqualified (Ep. 88, Joel McHale) 38:57 to 52:10 Jeremy: Whatever Happened to Pizza at McDonalds? (Episode 2) 54:32 to 58:15 Phyllis: Takedown Podcast (Ep. 98, Mo Knows Snacks) 60:38 to 65:10 Mike: Revisionist History (S01:E07, Hallelujah) 69:00 to 82:39

This week, we’re all heroes at LRB. Mike saved his family from conflict by sharing a heartfelt moment, even if it was only because his wires were tapped. Ann brazenly rejects the idea of “Gleeification,” despite only being our third-favorite babysitter. And Bobby offers to put his life and body on the line to settle whether or not Taco John’s is any good—if you’ll pay for the trip. And on top of all of that, we take time off from our important work to recap the latest week of TBTL. So join us as we climb the pyramid of deliciousness all the way to its pork peak, and feast on an idealized Dagwood from our favorite Mongolian Quiznos. It’s sure to make for some exciting at-plates. 

Be sure to check out Bean Baxter's ridiculously adorable old house, and the chocolate buffet at the Langham in Boston.

This week, Mike and Ann are joined by Sarah Mulrooney, proud BosTen, shaper of young minds, and someone who likes a nice bottle of Pinot Grigio. Mike repurposes an old game for a round of Make Sarah Mad, Ann has questions about culinary offerings at boarding schools, and Sarah shares the time she got into a Facebook beef with Luke. Then we go back to the “Saddest Day in TBTL History” and listen to Luke telling the Tens about his break up with Vanessa. It sounds like a downer, but we embrace the emotion and have a long talk about finding the courage to end something that you know isn’t working. Don’t skip this one, guys.

Based on Luke’s holiday accent and the sharp spike in the number of phone-throwings lately, it seems the Luck o’ the Irish has been too busy partying every weekend to grace us. But have no fear: Bobby, Ann, and special guest co-host Mike Farnan (i.e. the new and improved, two-legged Mike) are here to navigate this not-technically-a-blimp through your frustration, patch up any rough spots with red duct tape, and whisper in your ear (non-sexually, of course) why you’ve been listening to TBTL all this time. And we even get right down to business—no Maddow-sweeping the quarter-hour here!

All that plus a recap of this week’s shows (Girl Scouts! Boner pills! ASMR! … Not all at once!) and Mike opens his WAGON FULL OF LOOT LIVE, and it’s almost as awe-inspiring as Milton Berle’s junk. Almost.

When you’re done, check out this article on blimps from the New Yorker, and this great Key & Peele sketch, both mentioned by Mike. We should all be more like Mike.

This episode recaps TBTL episodes 2335 (Wallingford Wurst, headaches, St. Patrick’s Day, spelling bee, Girl Scout cookies, Vanilla Ice), 2336 (Techno geeks drop, CIA hacking, St. Patrick’s Day), Viagra, Goodyear blimp, Johnny Depp), 2337 (Eagles, Diana Ross, Technotronics Technogeek with Spreadshee, DashLane, Maddow, BBC interview, Luke’s Irish impression, ASMR), 2338 (Eagles, Fast and the Furriest, McDonald’s tweet, Julian Assange, Nielsen ratings), 2339 (ASMR, Smashmouth All Star, Milton Berle, Mutley, white noise, Richard Simmons podcast, housekeeping.)

Our pal Luke: charming, witty, fun, and ever-so-slightly unethical. From his intense desire for Charleston Chews and his childhood pal Aaron’s “muscle pullover hoodie” to helping himself to unpaid-for fast food lemonade, Luke’s always willing to share his experiences with minor larceny. And so, to celebrate these trivial transgressions, Christy and Ann are here to bring you a collection of TBTL clips about petty theft in the TBTL universe. In addition to Luke’s antics, we cover Jen’s story of a nefarious yard gnome theft ring and debate strategies for minimizing vehicular property damage. Plus, stories of our own petty thefts (and you thought we were such angels!). FYI: The app Christy mentioned in the show for helping figure out when to go to the bathroom during movies is called "RunPee" and you can find it at www.RunPee.com 

It’s been a rough week on TBTL, but there’s no need to Get Jesse James/Jones, because the I-35 Crew of Mike, Meredith and Ann is on the job. We’re fortified by 8 “cups” of coffee and enough Buffalo Frito Pie that the government won’t even want to watch us through our televisions. Our breakdown of last week’s shows includes agreeing that Luke’s pushing the bounds of the concept of the late checkout, deciding that you’re not a “cat person” until you get that third cat, and a refusal (mostly) to continue hashing out The Great Phone Incident of 2017. Also in the hopper: we talk about our own small anxieties at the gas station, the produce section, and the checkout counter. Mike shares his rage and frustration at being called a liar, Ann’s got the Tangent Tracker™ at full power, and Meredith has been single-handedly populating our Amazon purchases list. Remember, it’s only for techno-geeks with spreadsh

This week, Christy and Ann are joined by Andrea Ballard, co-host of the Preheated podcast and the person you go to when your coworkers won’t stop posting inappropriate pictures on the company intranet. We spend way too much time talking about dessert before stepping into the Wayback Machine to listen to the time Luke and Andrew inexplicably agreed to do a podcrawl review of the “classic” movie Look Who’s Talking Too. So many questions: how does someone’s career trajectory simultaneously include ‘cabbie’ and ‘licensed commercial jet pilot’? Is it possible this is a Scientology-influenced film? How can they critique this with straight faces? Why do all of Luke’s impressions turn into Bill Clinton?

We may not be that new podcast about Richard Simmons, and we may not be Roomba rich, but we’ve got a solid Mexican martini recipe, a sturdy case for our phone, and a bumper crop of Midwestern accents. Join Christy, Mike, Bobby, Meredith and Ann for a very special Little Red Bandwagon Week in Review that also includes the stories of how each of us caught the hot potato of responsibility that is the role of Podcast Host. It’s a well-done episode of LRB, and we couldn’t care less if you smother it in ketchup. 

Here’s that SNL Casey Affleck Dunkin’ Donuts commercial Bobby won’t stop talking about.

This week recaps TBTL episodes 2325 (Claim Jumper, Twin Peaks, Hooters, Port Townsend Film Festival, Oscars, Twitter), 2326 (Garfield, Amazon AWS ACS, Trump steak, hot dogs, Weird Al), 2327 (Food, Claim Jumper, fat, Tiesto, Skyjinx, taste on planes, umami, baseball intentional walk, butter on sandwiches), 2328 (Catch 22, Dr. Strangelove, Sauconys, New Day TV, publicists, Cat tongues, drool, douche nozzle), 2329 (Starbucks eggs, Luke on KUOW, dog diapers, thunder shirts, Don Rickles, Andrew’s phone, Andrew’s phone, Andrew’s phone.)