This Show Has Everything

Phan Phavorite Phyllis Fletcher returns to take Mike and Bobby back in time via shame spiral to a divey, smoky “steakhouse,” and the time an emboldened Jen “Flash” Andrews tried (and, unfortunately for Jason) succeeded in talking her way onstage with the band. Her actual performance? Not so hot. If only that band knew anything from the catalog of Bonnie Raitt.

While we have her, Fletch updates us on her recent shameful manual transmission woes on a wet, slippery Capitol Hill, and how women apparently have fantasies of forced mental vacations by way of non-life-threatening hospitalization.

Next time, Jen and Phyllis should just both stick to playing bass. Pretty much anyone can do that. Amirite?

This episode features a TBTL clip from Feb. 28, 2008, hour 2.

Noted anti-anti-semite Meredith Mahan is on the road, coping with some sad news with help from a Mexican martini from an off-mic Frizzell, and an opinionated, interrupting Edith in Orkin Studios at the Kyle Insect Museum. Hover on over to our pod-hovel where she joins Bobby “in league with Emma Watson at FedEx Office” Pape and Ann “put your ass on the seat!” Lundholm for a gluttonous smörgåsbord of TBTL topics fit for a Ron Upshaw +1, helps explain a Burbank family not-quite paradox, and throws one hell of a hospital happy hour. It’s an episode great for any office space!

If you want more Luke Taco Bell talk, check outthis recent episode of Stack of Dimes. If you want more Birthday Paradox info check out this website. If you want to make Duff’s not-quite-trail mix, check out this recipe. And if you want to be able to make phone calls, listen to music AND take pictures on the go, check out this little bit of genius technology.

We are joined by EvereTen and LRB alumni Dana Steele to play a clip, of a clip, of a podcast that was played on the podcast that this podcast is about. If it sounds confusing, don't worry just take a leap of faith and stick with us as we talk about how hearing this TBTL segment was a turning point for Dana's life and new beginnings.  As discussed on the show:  Hear Dana on LRB #33: "Wolf Magic" The TBTL clip on this episode is from TBTL #1634: "What Are Ya Doin’ Here… Day Jobs Edition" Hear all ten episodes of "Day Job" at http://www.northwester.org/dayjob 

Grab your LOL shirt, pour a big bowl of Steak O’s and milk, and get ready for some snuggle time with Eddie, because it’s time to review last week’s TBTL.  Meredith, Mike and Ann are ready to play 20 Questions about the topics they’ll need to cover: 1)Is it a hot dog? 2)Is it a magnet? 3)Is it a hot dog magnet? They discuss the meaning behind teenage Andrew’s visit to his driving instructor’s apartment, share some close calls (with good and bad outcomes) regarding bathroom emergencies, and try to separate the George Michaels from the George Michaelses. While they have slightly differing opinions about Valentine’s Day, they’re in complete agreement that under no circumstances should Luke be allowed to take flying lessons. Additionally, Meredith tells us about the disease with the best/worst name ever, Ann silently cringes as the other two discuss something they refer to as a “space turd grabber”, and Mike is excited for Luke to get his Light Phone, if only for the rich vein of mockery he can mine. Oh, and if we can’t get a plane home from Portland, we’ll be sure to stay at the Hotel Deluxe, because “this is how a hotel treats a VIP customer.”

We’ve popped the champagne, spread the rose petals on the bed, and put on the sexy, sexy music. All that remains is to ask the question: will you be our Valentine? Ann and Christy are here with a clip show about TBTL and Valentimes Day, and boy, is there a lot to talk about. Topics discussed include: how we feel about this dubious holiday, conversation hearts – yay or nay?, the horror that is ‘work spouses’, Luke’s disregard for online restaurant reservation systems, management of romantic expectations, and how it is that two 40-year-old men in long-term relationships can’t seem to figure out how Valentine’s Day works. Plus, a look back at the TBTL Dating Game, with Sean “Guy Smiley” DeTore as the most amazing host ever.

P.S. Here’s a bonus ‘work spouse’ joke Christy wishes she had thought of during recording: “The closest thing I have to a work husband is Mike, mostly because I hate him as much as Emily does. ZING!”

Strap your sled to your most reliable pet, and slide on down to the closest podstore: you can even go ahead and take that spot for the Listener of the Month, you’re entitled to it. Special guest co-host Steve “Stu” “StuBot” “Chris Hayes Follows Me on Twitter” Neuman joins Bobby and Mike to recap the latest week of TBTL, and to update us all on recent news in his life both professional and anatomical. It turns out, the only path more treacherous than the one down Alabama Hill this week is the one to Stu’s vas deferens. We don’t need another gyro—we just need to stop getting outbid by wheelerdealer2000.

Education doctor and San Jose Ten Ellen “Andrew on the Inside” Middaugh takes a break from diagnosing social media’s impact on politics today (spoiler: it’s … not great) to join Ann and Bobby for a celebration of Luke and Andrew’s ability to riff on pretty much anything, as proven in a series of Led Zeppelin song titles funneled through Luke’s impression of Kai Ryssdal. The clip, from October 24, 2014, comes from the same episode as Luke’s legendary dombass note (as we’ve previously covered with Phyllis). Overall the episode is an embarrassment of riches, unlike Luke’s old classmate Brendan Boyd, who is just an embarrassment.

Silver Lining Alert: Luke’s impression of Kai Ryssdal gives Ann and Ellen a chance to share a Whole Lotta Love for their favorite “voice crush,” who is still on Ann’s laminated list even though he’s traded in his convertible and Navy uniform for a workhorse minivan. (No one tell Justin Trudeau.) 

Grab a Diet Dr Pepper and some pizza-shaped gummies at the Durn Good Grocery, because Mike, Bobby and Ann are ready to unpack another week of TBTL. We’ll need to pour ourselves a big cup of chicory coffee to go with those sous-vide eggs, because frankly, we’re still recovering from Luke’s “in the rough” encounter with a Florida groundskeeper. Mike shares some blistering hot takes about the latest episode of Entitled Etiquette: Travel Edition, including an inspired analogy between Luke and a Domino’s pizza. Andrew’s story of his recent fall prompts us to share our own unfortunate experiences with gravity, including Bobby’s hand-disfiguring bike injury, wheelchair wisdom from Mike, and why Ann feels weird about the movie Under the Tuscan Sun. Speaking of movies, don’t miss the sure-to-be blockbuster thriller, Anne of Nakatomi Plaza. And we finally learn the motto that adorns the Frizzell family crest.

P.S. Don’t forget to check out what’s going on for National Pie Month with our friends over at the Preheated podcast!

The most specific PSA you'll never need in this month's Phyllis Phave edition of LRB. Meredith and Phyllis join their host Christy who guides us through some genuine girl talk: Phyllis and phriends lose 1,000 lbs during the Trump administration, and Meredith prepares to be the belle of the real-life ball. Then we go back in time to the waning radio days of TBTL when Luke and Jen announce what not to do on a live national broadcast when you're interviewing a trauma survivor. We get On Our Media and give you news you probably can't use on this week's Little Red Bandwagon. All that, and we congratulate our first monthly Wagons Full of Loot winner!

Crack open a cold, refreshing Diet Coke, and don’t dare email us about the fake sugar—Showmates Bobby, Ann and Meredith don’t want to hear about it. Instead, enjoy a defense of casual fandom, what to do if you can hear your neighbors peeing, a final Dukakis turkey carcass count, a first-hand Coachella sharpshoot, occasional encounters with an actual EGOT, why you shouldn’t copy your long division test off the Asian kid, and many, many more pitons hammered into the cracks of Mt. TBTL. Plus, Simpsons Watch™, an Anthony Update™, Joe-Joe on the Squat™ and more, all thanks to great contributing Wagoneers. This is the perfect episode to turn up in an effort to drown out the sound of your parents having sex. 

Be sure to also check out this Dutch response to the election of Donald Trump, and these awesome Japanese toilets!