Thoughts May Vary

In this Thought, the co-hosts update each other on their recent unpackings, including: discrepancies in how we treat folks who use substances based on their artistic talents or notoriety and the growth that comes with learning to fight productively with a partner who has a different communication style than you. 

They also briefly touch on a new term heard to describe suicide. If that portion may feel activating to you today, feel free to skip through 17:48-23:30. 

00:00 - Coming in hot

6:57 - Blue supermoon

11:17 - M’s Unpacking: the way we demonize the poor and people who use substances

17:48 - Unpacking: “self-transitioning” and the labels we use

23:30 - G’s Unpacking: fighting in long-term relationships

44:35 - Meadowlark's witch week

Don’t forget to DM us on IG or submit a question on thoughtsmayvary.com to have your question or theme unpacked on a future episode! 

SHOP “CO-CREATE” TMV’S MANIFESTATION JOURNAL: 

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/the-tmv-shop

Discount codes, extra unpackings, journal prompts, vlogging (+more!) all happening with our familia over on Patreon. Come hang out — https://www.patreon.com/thoughtsmayvary

🎙️ Listen anywhere you get your podcasts 🎙️

🎥 Watch episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@thoughtsmayvary  

🫠 Follow along, we're funny on the internet sometimes

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thoughtsmayvarypod

https://www.tiktok.com/@thoughtsmayvarypod

Threads @thoughtsmayvarypod

Meadow: https://www.instagram.com/itsmeadowlark

Gaby: https://www.instagram.com/gabyulloa_

DISCLAIMER: We are not licensed professionals. If you are seeking licensed and professional mental health support, please reach out to 741-741 (The Crisis Text Line) or The NAMI Helpline or The Trevor Project or reach out to us for more resources.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

And we’re back with another expansive guest episode. Please welcome Sephora Beauty Director and Mental Health Advocate and Certified Clairvoyant Reader, Melinda Solares.

In today’s thought, Melinda and the co-hosts unpack the integration and duality of corporate and creative spaces, growing in authenticity / how that leads to to conscious decision making, Melinda’s “aha” moment with spirituality, becoming clairvoyant, connecting with your ancestors, plus so much more. 

Thank you to Melinda for her ongoing beautiful vulnerability! 

ALL THINGS MELINDA: 

https://www.instagram.com/ladyymelinda/

https://www.tiktok.com/@ladyymelinda?_t=8VeyEil4Ozq&_r=1

SHOP “CO-CREATE” TMV’S MANIFESTATION JOURNAL:

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/the-tmv-shop

Discount codes, extra unpackings, journal prompts, vlogging (+more!) all happening with our familia over on Patreon. Come hang out — https://www.patreon.com/thoughtsmayvary

Don’t forget to DM us on IG or submit a question on thoughtsmayvary.com to have your question or theme unpacked on a future episode!

🎙️ Listen anywhere you get your podcasts 🎙️

🎥 Watch episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@thoughtsmayvary

🫠 Follow along, we're funny on the internet sometimes

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thoughtsmayvarypod

https://www.tiktok.com/@thoughtsmayvarypod

Threads @thoughtsmayvarypod

Meadow: https://www.instagram.com/itsmeadowlark

Gaby: https://www.instagram.com/gabyulloa_

DISCLAIMER: We are not licensed professionals. If you are seeking licensed and professional mental health support, please reach out to 741-741 (The Crisis Text Line) or The NAMI Helpline or The Trevor Project or reach out to us for more resources.

For advertising inquiries please email [email protected] 

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

In today’s chatty unpacking, the co-hosts unpack strategies for creative ruts, parceling out anxiety pings vs. authentic pings, and holding space for grief/death and all the complexities of spirituality as a human existing in this world. 

0:00 Hurricane + boyfriend banter

8:48 G’s unpacking creative flow states

14:24 Anxiety vs Downloads

22:20 M’s unpacking complexities of life and death 

Don’t forget to DM us on IG or submit a question on thoughtsmayvary.com to have your question or theme unpacked on a future episode! 

 

SHOP “CO-CREATE” TMV’S MANIFESTATION JOURNAL: 

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/the-tmv-shop

Discount codes, extra unpackings, journal prompts, vlogging (+more!) all happening with our familia over on Patreon. Come hang out — https://www.patreon.com/thoughtsmayvary

🎙️ Listen anywhere you get your podcasts 🎙️

🎥 Watch episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@thoughtsmayvary  

🫠 Follow along, we're funny on the internet sometimes

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thoughtsmayvarypod

https://www.tiktok.com/@thoughtsmayvarypod

Threads @thoughtsmayvarypod

Meadow: https://www.instagram.com/itsmeadowlark

Gaby: https://www.instagram.com/gabyulloa_

DISCLAIMER: We are not licensed professionals. If you are seeking licensed and professional mental health support, please reach out to 741-741 (The Crisis Text Line) or The NAMI Helpline or The Trevor Project or reach out to us for more resources.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Pull out those notebooks because today’s lesson in community care is a powerful one! Today, we are welcoming Minaa B. LMSW, to the podcast to learn all about her new book,"Owning Our Struggles" as well as healing in community care. From how to be a better peer to culturally competent mental health care, we spoke about how self care is the bridge to community care; and community care is the bridge to community healing. 

Throughout this conversation we covered:

Minaa’s new book “Owning Our Struggles: A Path to Healing and Finding Community in a Broken World” 

Navigating community care + mental health advice on the internet

How Minaa’s personal experiences influenced her philosophy

Realizing the power of group therapy

How to recognize when content isn’t for you (& more on digital communities)

Community care translation into politics + systematic level community healing 

Minaa’s favorite actionable healing tools 

Gratitude, grounding, co-regulating with community, & more

5 quick tips to be a better peer

As Minaa reminds us, “we are not healing to exist within a vacuum; we are healing to integrate into community”. In OWNING OUR STRUGGLES (on sale: 08/22/23) Minaa helps us to find the courage to start accepting and healing from our pasts through the power of self-realization and community care.

In this powerful and practical guide, Minaa shares therapeutic tools, client stories, and actionable insights to help you on your healing journey, along with reflections from her personal experiences. Each chapter focuses on a common emotional struggle—from moving past isolation and despair, to navigating racial trauma, developing emotional maturity, and finding our village.

Pre-order OWNING OUR STRUGGLES here: https://www.minaab.com/links

ALL THINGS MINAA! 

https://www.minaab.com/

https://www.instagram.com/minaa_b/

https://minaab.substack.com/

Don’t forget to DM us on IG or submit a question on thoughtsmayvary.com to have your question or theme unpacked on a future episode! 

 

SHOP “CO-CREATE” TMV’S MANIFESTATION JOURNAL: 

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/the-tmv-shop

Discount codes, extra unpackings, journal prompts, vlogging (+more!) all happening with our familia over on Patreon. Come hang out — https://www.patreon.com/thoughtsmayvary

🎙️ Listen anywhere you get your podcasts 🎙️

🎥 Watch episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@thoughtsmayvary  

🫠 Follow along, we're funny on the internet sometimes

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thoughtsmayvarypod

https://www.tiktok.com/@thoughtsmayvarypod

Threads @thoughtsmayvarypod

Meadow: https://www.instagram.com/itsmeadowlark

Gaby: https://www.instagram.com/gabyulloa_

DISCLAIMER: We are not licensed professionals. If you are seeking licensed and professional mental health support, please reach out to 741-741 (The Crisis Text Line) or The NAMI Helpline or The Trevor Project or reach out to us for more resources.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Please welcome back one of our most favorite people, Johanna Kandel! 

Johanna is the founder of The Alliance for Eating Disorders — the nation’s leading nonprofit providing referrals, education, and support to individuals experiencing eating disorders and their loved ones. After recovering from a long battle with various EDs, she founded The Alliance, bringing her personal insight into the incredible work that she does. 

Last time Johanna graced TMV (“Thought 55. Johanna Kandel On Supporting Yourself When You Have An Eating Disorder”), the response was overwhelming! Y’all loved her wisdom, vulnerability, and tangible tools. So, this week, we brought her back for a community Q&A. We asked her many of your questions including early signs to tell you’re relapsing, how to implement boundaries, navigating food guilt, body neutrality vs. body positivity, and more. 

From 29:15 - 35:23 we speak to questions related to strategies around eating + nourishing your body (re: food guilt, building healthy relationships with food while eating “well”, + tips to nourish yourself). While there are no specifics in here, if this feels a little activating to you go ahead and skip go the next question at 35:23 <3 

0:17 UN Event Recap

7:42 Johanna’s Unpacking

10:52 Q&A starts! Q1: I’m sick of talking about my ED because nothing has changed even after talking about it a lot. Any advice?

16:19 Q2: Early signs to tell you’re relapsing + how to open up to a partner when you know you are relapsing

21:19 Q3: Any thoughts or advice for those who fall into disordered eating but not full ED?

24:35 Q4: Is there anything The Alliance For ED is doing to help facilitate revisions to the DSM?

25:37 Q5: How to put boundaries with your friends on topics to voice without feeling “sensitive”?

29:28 Q6: I finally feel free from food guilt or the fear of certain “unhealthy foods” but now I feel like I eat in a really chaotic way without being conscious of what I eat for the fear of being obsessive with it again. How do I build a healthy relationship with food while also eating “well”? 

31:33 Q7: I’m trying so hard to eat but nothing sounds good. Tips for nourishing yourself when it just feels hard? 

36:26 Q8: How to achieve body neutrality? Don’t think I can get to body positivity? 

41:12 Q9 I still engage in some behaviors that aren’t as detrimental as others just to ensure less anxiety. What are the best tools to calm down to stop a purge or engagement?

45:11 Q10 How to support a friend who is deep into an ED and getting worse?

47:11 Q11 I’ve been struggling with an ED for 10+ years, can you ever say you’re recovered?

The Alliance offers comprehensive services, including:

• Educational presentations and training days

• Free, weekly, therapist-led support groups nationwide (virtual and in-person) for those experiencing eating disorders and for their loved ones

• Support and referrals through both our free help-line and comprehensive referral website/app

• Direct, low-cost, life-saving, outpatient treatment to underinsured and uninsured adults in the South Florida community.

• Unique and empowering Southern Smash scale smashing events and SmashTALK panel discussions.

BE SURE TO CHECK OUT THE ALLIANCE! 

https://www.allianceforeatingdisorders.com/

https://www.instagram.com/alliancefored/

Weekly support groups include Pro-Recovery ED Support, LGBTQ+ Support, Friends + Family Group, and more! 

Don’t forget to DM us on IG or submit a question on thoughtsmayvary.com to have your question or theme unpacked on a future episode! 

 

SHOP “CO-CREATE” TMV’S MANIFESTATION JOURNAL: 

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/the-tmv-shop

Discount codes, extra unpackings, journal prompts, vlogging (+more!) all happening with our familia over on Patreon. Come hang out — https://www.patreon.com/thoughtsmayvary

🎙️ Listen anywhere you get your podcasts 🎙️

🎥 Watch episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@thoughtsmayvary  

🫠 Follow along, we're funny on the internet sometimes

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thoughtsmayvarypod

https://www.tiktok.com/@thoughtsmayvarypod

Threads @thoughtsmayvarypod

Meadow: https://www.instagram.com/itsmeadowlark

Gaby: https://www.instagram.com/gabyulloa_

DISCLAIMER: We are not licensed professionals. If you are seeking licensed and professional mental health support, please reach out to 741-741 (The Crisis Text Line) or The NAMI Helpline or The Trevor Project or reach out to us for more resources.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

This week, the cohosts unpack a summer of self growth and healing. They reflect on progress’ presence after years of quotidian moments and choices, as well as enjoying relationships for what they are. They talk gaslighting depression, honoring boundaries, and allowing others to work toward their authentic selves on their own terms. Then, they answer your questions!

Don’t forget to DM us on IG or submit a question on thoughtsmayvary.com to have your question or theme unpacked on a future episode! 

 

SHOP “CO-CREATE” TMV’S MANIFESTATION JOURNAL: 

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/the-tmv-shop

Discount codes, extra unpackings, journal prompts, vlogging (+more!) all happening with our familia over on Patreon. Come hang out — https://www.patreon.com/thoughtsmayvary

🎙️ Listen anywhere you get your podcasts 🎙️

🎥 Watch episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@thoughtsmayvary  

🫠 Follow along, we're funny on the internet sometimes

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thoughtsmayvarypod

https://www.tiktok.com/@thoughtsmayvarypod

Threads @thoughtsmayvarypod

Meadow: https://www.instagram.com/itsmeadowlark

Gaby: https://www.instagram.com/gabyulloa_

DISCLAIMER: We are not licensed professionals. If you are seeking licensed and professional mental health support, please reach out to 741-741 (The Crisis Text Line) or The NAMI Helpline or The Trevor Project or reach out to us for more resources.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Well well well, if it isn't the hypothetical smoke circle of the century back at it again for another pod ep. Maryah Greene is a New York based Plant Doctor & Stylist and founder of the plant design firm, Greene Piece. She is a former elementary educator and graduate from the Bank Street College of Education. Seemingly unrelated, Maryah’s time spent in the classroom coupled with her journey as NYC’s go-to plant specialist, sprouted her debut picture book, Good Things (published by Penguin Random House). Much like her plants, Maryah knows what it’s like to start from seed and has no intention of stopping anytime soon. 

Shop Good Things, a tender and honest story about loss, hope and memory. AVAILABLE August 1, 2023.

https://www.yourgreenepiece.com/good-things

 

ALL THINGS MARYAH

https://www.instagram.com/greene.piece/

https://www.tiktok.com/@maryahgreene

yourgreenepiece.com

SHOP “CO-CREATE” TMV’S MANIFESTATION JOURNAL: 

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/the-tmv-shop

Discount codes, extra unpackings, journal prompts, vlogging (+more!) all happening with our familia over on Patreon. Come hang out — https://www.patreon.com/thoughtsmayvary

Don’t forget to DM us on IG or submit a question on thoughtsmayvary.com to have your question or theme unpacked on a future episode! 

🎙️ Listen anywhere you get your podcasts 🎙️

🎥 Watch episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@thoughtsmayvary  

🫠 Follow along, we're funny on the internet sometimes

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thoughtsmayvarypod

https://www.tiktok.com/@thoughtsmayvarypod

Threads @thoughtsmayvarypod

Meadow: https://www.instagram.com/itsmeadowlark

Gaby: https://www.instagram.com/gabyulloa_

DISCLAIMER: We are not licensed professionals. If you are seeking licensed and professional mental health support, please reach out to 741-741 (The Crisis Text Line) or The NAMI Helpline or The Trevor Project or reach out to us for more resources.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

This week, the co-hosts unpack the vital role that failure plays in personal development and share their top coping strategies for navigating creative blocks. In a world full of “cringe” and “pick me’s”, not being afraid to be seen trying is a superpower for growth and self discovery. 

As friend of the podcast Tefi loves to remind us, fail faster to learn quicker. Every "no" you get told, is getting you closer to that "yes"! 

SHOP “CO-CREATE” TMV’S MANIFESTATION JOURNAL: 

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/the-tmv-shop

Discount codes, extra unpackings, journal prompts, vlogging (+more!) all happening with our familia over on Patreon. Come hang out — https://www.patreon.com/thoughtsmayvary

Don’t forget to DM us on IG or submit a question on thoughtsmayvary.com to have your question or theme unpacked on a future episode! 

🎙️ Listen anywhere you get your podcasts 🎙️

🎥 Watch episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@thoughtsmayvary  

🫠 Follow along, we're funny on the internet sometimes

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thoughtsmayvarypod

https://www.tiktok.com/@thoughtsmayvarypod

Threads @thoughtsmayvarypod

Meadow: https://www.instagram.com/itsmeadowlark

Gaby: https://www.instagram.com/gabyulloa_

DISCLAIMER: We are not licensed professionals. If you are seeking licensed and professional mental health support, please reach out to 741-741 (The Crisis Text Line) or The NAMI Helpline or The Trevor Project or reach out to us for more resources.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Our dear friend and your TikTok tia is back! Please welcome back Tefi Pessoa, our first TMV regular. 

This go around, Tefi and the cohosts covered it all: 

Balancing gratitude and movement in career growth 

Gaby’s surprise present was Tefi’s presence 

Tips for when it’s time to pivot in life

Abundance mindset in a capitalist society 

Parasocial relationships + media boundaries 

How to navigate success bringing folks around that don’t always have your best interests 

Lying to your therapist

Tefi’s mother + grandmother have never spoken illy about themselves in front of her 

and so much more!

Mentioned:

Mama Sabe Studio https://www.etsy.com/shop/MAMASABE

ALL THINGS TEFI:

https://www.tiktok.com/@hellotefi

https://www.youtube.com/c/TefiShow

https://www.instagram.com/hellotefi/

https://tefi.komi.io/

SHOP “CO-CREATE” TMV’S MANIFESTATION JOURNAL: 

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/the-tmv-shop

Discount codes, extra unpackings, journal prompts, vlogging (+more!) all happening with our familia over on Patreon. Come hang out — https://www.patreon.com/thoughtsmayvary

Don’t forget to DM us on IG or submit a question on thoughtsmayvary.com to have your question or theme unpacked on a future episode! 

🎙️ Listen anywhere you get your podcasts 🎙️

🎥 Watch episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@thoughtsmayvary  

🫠 Follow along, we're funny on the internet sometimes

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thoughtsmayvarypod

https://www.tiktok.com/@thoughtsmayvarypod

Threads @thoughtsmayvarypod

Meadow: https://www.instagram.com/itsmeadowlark

Gaby: https://www.instagram.com/gabyulloa_

DISCLAIMER: We are not licensed professionals. If you are seeking licensed and professional mental health support, please reach out to 741-741 (The Crisis Text Line) or The NAMI Helpline or The Trevor Project or reach out to us for more resources.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Welcome back to TMV! This week, Meadow + Gaby unpack something you’ve heard a whole lot about on the podcast before: inner child work. The cohosts define inner child work and give a brief psychology lesson, differentiate inner child vs shadow, share about their first time interacting with their own inner child, describe all the myriad of ways to connect with your inner child, and more. 

Post a picture of your inner child on IG and tag us! @thoughtsmayvarypod 

5:22 Inner Child 101

12:34 M&G’s first encounters with their inner child

20:24 Unpacking WHY inner child work is so valuable

31:15 Modalities + practices for inner child work

48:02 Myths about inner child work

SHOP “CO-CREATE” TMV’S MANIFESTATION JOURNAL: 

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/the-tmv-shop

Discount codes, extra unpackings, journal prompts, vlogging (+more!) all happening with our familia over on Patreon. Come hang out — https://www.patreon.com/thoughtsmayvary

Don’t forget to DM us on IG or submit a question on thoughtsmayvary.com to have your question or theme unpacked on a future episode! 

🎙️ Listen anywhere you get your podcasts 🎙️

🎥 Watch episodes: https://www.youtube.com/@thoughtsmayvary  

🫠 Follow along, we're funny on the internet sometimes

https://www.thoughtsmayvary.com/

https://www.instagram.com/thoughtsmayvarypod

https://www.tiktok.com/@thoughtsmayvarypod

Threads @thoughtsmayvarypod

Meadow: https://www.instagram.com/itsmeadowlark

Gaby: https://www.instagram.com/gabyulloa_

DISCLAIMER: We are not licensed professionals. If you are seeking licensed and professional mental health support, please reach out to 741-741 (The Crisis Text Line) or The NAMI Helpline or The Trevor Project or reach out to us for more resources.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands