Thoughts on Thoughts

Parenting is hard! We know that when your child is lying, hitting or screaming the last thing you want to do is connect and attach with them. But this is so important! In this episode, we are going to share some concrete ideas to help you more easily (and effectively) discipline your children from an attachment perspective. We will be going over the window of tolerance and the upstairs and downstairs brain. These are theories that will help you understand where your child is at and what tactic will best help them reconnect with their mind, body and emotions. We then explain the ACT model of limit setting, which is what play therapists use to help children learn limits while staying regulated in their sessions. These techniques can hopefully help you discipline your child or teen and attach with them at the same time. Too good to be true? We promise it can work. Enjoy!

Everybody loves to talk about their feelings. Alright, you got me, that's not true, but maybe we would be more inclined to do it if we felt like we were great at it! In this episode we talk about communication basics. We will touch on how to be skilled in active listening, how to express empathy, how to communicate how you are feeling effectively and why it is important to be vulnerable in crucial conversations with others. We have found these skills to be essential in our daily lives and in our work as therapists and know that these skills can strengthen your relationships if you put them to use. Enjoy!

Becoming connected to others requires first becoming connected to ourselves. One of the best ways we can understand ourselves is through our emotions. In this episode, we will guide you through how to become more emotionally intelligent and self-aware. These skills will allow you to understand your internal state and reactions and then better manage each of your emotions. We will give you tips on how to observe your feelings, feel them fully (rather than distracting ourselves with chocolate and Instagram!) and then use those feelings to connect to the world around you. If you are more emotionally aware of yourself you will inherently be more emotionally aware of others and will have more empathy for those around you. We'll help you feel it all!

Feelings Wheel- feelingswheel.com

Free meditation app that Taylor mentioned- Insight Timer

Our attachment style can either make or break our romantic relationships. In this episode, we are discussing what an avoidant, anxious or secure attachment style looks like when we fall in love. The things we discuss here can be applied to dating relationships, marriages and even in close friendships. If you find yourself on the avoidant or anxious end of the spectrum, we will go over some ways that you can move towards that relationship we all want...a secure one!

If you are interested in even more attachment information here are some book recommendations:

• "Attached:The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find - And Keep - Love" by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller (this book has the quiz we talk about that you can take to identify your attachment style).
• "Hold Me Tight" by Sue Johnson

A healthy attachment style is a protective factor that allows us to have healthy relationships throughout our lives. Our attachment style begins to develop in childhood through our relationships with our primary caregivers and continues throughout our life. In this episode, we explain three different attachment styles: anxious, avoidant and secure. We will teach you the difference between these styles and how to identify them in childhood. If you recognize an anxious or avoidant style in yourself or someone you know we have come up with several ideas for you to begin to repair your attachment.

Welcome to our podcast! We are your hosts, three therapists who want to tell you the things you really need to know to help you have a healthy relationship with yourself and with those around you. In this mini introduction episode we are going to tell you a bit about us, why we are putting together this podcast and what you can look forward to hearing in our future episodes. If you stick with us through it, you may just found out if we have a blooper reel (full disclosure...we definitely have a blooper reel). Enjoy!