Holy ravioli, Batman! The Hoes are deep diving into some serious refrigerated pasta from Trader Joe's — or should we say, Trader Giotto’s? This carboloaded episode also comes with hot takes on Lady Gaga’s pronunciation of “pasta,” discussions of who would make a better phone sex worker, and the Hoes’ newest invention, dessert pasta. 

In the cart:

• Phigment Red Wine Blend
• Tomato Basil Marinara
• Arugula & Parmigiano Reggiano Ravioli
• Butternut Squash Triangoli
• Porchini Mushroom & Truffle Triangoli
• Ricotta & Lemon Zest Ravioli
• Goat Cheese & Sundried Tomato Ravioli

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It's Katie's birthday, so she chose to review the ultimate birthday dessert: Pie, duh. Of course the Hoes had to kick it off with Katie's favorite frozen pie ever, but then things took a turn. They explore whether pie crusts could actually be made out of farts or not, try to translate modern slang and take a particularly embarrassing stroll down Thanksgiving memory lane. Happy birthday, Katie! 

In the cart:

• Cecilia B Vino Spumante Rosé 
• Key Lime Pie
• Lemon Meringue Tart
• Apple Crumble Pie
• Tarte Aux Fruits
• Peaches & Cream Tarte

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This week, the Hoes are putting their tamale sommelier skills to the test while tasting Trader Joe’s fresh tamale selection and a few side pieces to round things out. And the favorite choice? Well, the Hoes did not see it coming. They also dish on which Spice Girl they wish they were, items they wish TJ’s carried, their joint celebrity name and Molotov cocktails. 

In the cart:

• Reposado Tequila
• Queso Cheese Dip
• Sweet Potato Tortilla Chips
• Elote Corn Chip Dippers
• Five Layer Dip
• Handmade Chicken & Green Chile Tamale
• Handmade Pork Tamale & Red Sauce
• Handmade Vegetarian Tamale

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The Hoes go HAM on some frozen burgers and discover a new favorite condiment in the process. Plus, Evie reveals that she knows absolutely nothing about beer, and Katie somehow segues into that one time she saw a dead body. Naturally.

In the cart:

• Grass Fed Angus Beef Burgers
• Honey Pale Ale Mustard
• Hamburger Buns 
• Trader José Premium Lager
• Chili Lime Chicken Burgers
• Turkey Burgers
• Ground Buffalo Burgers

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I scream, you scream, Evie may actually be screaming. That's right! It's officially summer, so the Hoes are cooling down with some ice cream. They sample everything from a traditional favorite to a new Trader Joe's item that has been buzzing around Instagram and makes quite the first impression. Childhood memories resurface, '90s references are dropped and the Hoes attempt to get to the bottom of Evie's dislike for ice cream once and for all. 

In the cart: 

• French Vanilla
• Vanilla Ice Cream Bon Bons with Chocolate Cookie Crust
• Mini Mint Ice Cream Mouthfuls 
• Speculoos Cookie Butter Ice Cream
• Ube Ice Cream 

Want more Trader Hoes? Visit Patreon.com/TraderHoes to learn how to get bonus content every month! 

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It's the first installment of our guest series, Ho-ing It Out! And Guest Ho Analisa did not come to play. She's fully stocked, fully pregnant, and fully prepared to stand by her Trader Joe's favorites -- no matter what the Trader Hoes think. 

In the cart:
- 2017 Chariot Gypsy Red 
- Quinoa & Black Bean Infused Tortilla Chips
- Garlic Chipotle Salsa
- Fig & Olive Crisps
-  White Stilton With Apricots
- Mushroom & Black Truffle Flatbread
- Chicken Tikka Samosas
- Dark Chocolate Filled With Speculoos Cookie Spread

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The moment you've all been waiting for is here: PICKLE POPCORN IS BACK, HOES! So, naturally, the Hoes had to pop a few other bags of Trader Joe's popcorn varieties to see if Popcorn in a Pickle still reigns supreme. Plus, the Hoes answer some fan mail, discuss snack mishaps in the office and share the lengths to which they went to stock up on their favorite popcorn ever. #BBPP365

In the cart: 

• Organic Popcorn with Olive Oil
• Popcorn with Herbs & Spices
• White Cheddar Popcorn
• Movie Theater Popcorn
• Popcorn in a Pickle

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The Hoes aren’t the only flaky things in this week’s episode. They’re breaking off a few pieces of Trader Joe’s pastry section, while sprinkling in some facts, feminism and fables. And plenty of alliteration, apparently!

In the cart: 

• Liberté Pinot Noir
• Raspberry Walnut Rugelach
• Chocolate Brooklyn Babka
• Organic Chunky Apple Cinnamon Bread
• Almond Danish Pastry
• Cinnamon Croissant Loaf

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The Hoes return to the holy trifecta that is Trader Joe’s wine, cheese and crackers, and discover some unorthodox pairings along the way. Plus, stay tuned to find out how you can get a sneak peek at our big summer reveal. 

In the cart:

• El Castilla Syrah
• Trader Joe’s Reserve Syrah
• Picton Sauvignon Blanc
• Chèvre with Honey
• Chipotle Toscano Cheese
• Italian Truffle Cheese
• 3 Seed Sweet Potato Crackers
• Seeded Mango & Ginger Crisps

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Leaf it to these Hoes to live life on the wedge by trying a few of Trader Joe’s most convenient offerings: the premade salads. Sure, there were some clear winners, but these greens could have all benefited from larger, shakeable containers. Tell us we’re not alone in desiring ample salad shaking packaging!

In the cart:
-Crunchy Slaw with Chicken, Crispy Noodles & Peanut Dressing
-Kale & Edamame Salad
-Mexicali Salad
-Baked Falafel Salad Palette
-Organic Kale Chicken Caesar Salad

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