Trust the Bachelor Process

It's fantasy suite week baby and we are ready for Hannah to get some! Mainly because she's been so horny all season and we feel she deserves this. Unfortunately, she also made the biggest mistake of her life this week by inviting every single other man into bed except Tyler. "If he's the one, then I have the rest of my life to be physical with him." Um, I'm sorry, then why not start now!? Anyway, to help us cool down is long time friend of the pod, Kaitlin Bass! She's also furious about the Tyler situation. But moving on.. the moment we've all been waiting for happened when Hannah finally saw the light and semt Luke P's judgmental ass home. However, it's still Jed Bach Nation still seems most concerned with. In the end, we know Hannah deserves the best, and the best would cearly have been Tyler's D. Until next week!

The hilarious Alyssa Litman joins us on TTBP this week to discuss an episode she's uniquely qualified for! As a Westlake native and a former CLASSMATE of Peter's, she gives incredible insight into the man behind the plane. Also, WTF didn't you ask her out in Middle School, Peter!? We later dive deep into Tyler's perfection. And possibly get too carried away. We also discuss why Luke P is somehow more tolerable than Jed (I know, can you believe?) and round out the episode with a classic game of "Where's Windmill?" Much like Hannah, we're just biding time until Fantasy Suite Week.

It's Amsterdam week and we're all drunk!! Maybe not totally drunk, but enough to be raw and vulnerable and real.. which is all Hannah has been asking from us for weeks! Good thing Colleen Klinefelter joins TTBP this week to help keep everything on track and remind society that Luke P is a monster and Tyler is only to be celebrated from now until the end of days. While Jed reminds us that no one can be trusted so you might as well just bang whoever you want in a windmill. The clock ticks by as we wait for "I have had sex... and Jesus still loves me", and we continue to commission artists to stitch it on a pillow for us. But for now, we'll see you at hometowns y'all!

Luke P is being exposed, Jed is getting cheesier by the minute, and Hannah is horny as shit - and TTBP is here for it! Luckily friend of the pod, Ruthie Holmes (@theruthieholmes), joined this week's episode to provide the hot takes and ask the tough questions. Is it sexy when a guy shows up singing at your window? Do guys get boners when they are scared? Did Charles Dickens write Oliver Twist? The world may never know. But what we do know is that Jed is a liar and you cannot trust him. Also, everyone should go check out Haley Stevens music to ensure she gets more famous than Jed. We cannot wait to see how this unfolds and we cannot wait for Luke's sorry ass to be sent home. Hopefully next week!

TTBP is finally back and just in time for the worst episode in Bachelorette history! Luckily there was some major news in Bachelor Nation to review since Chris Harrison decided to use this week to recap the first half of the season. Thank God, because we were starting to forget which guy made Hannah laugh that one time 2 weeks ago. First, celebrations are in order for the Nation's newest engaged couple trying to get their own reality show! Second, we wish good luck and good tans to our newest Bachelor in Paradise cast. Thirdly, Jed is TRASH, except for when he's being a little cute and funny of course. And last but not least, Tyler is still an angel. Although this week didn't bring us all of the drama we thought it was going to, at least we're one step closer to solving the mystery of the salmon jacket.

Well, it's been 6 weeks and turns out we already have a winner. Everyone, please pack your bags and leave because Tyler C is it and we're done. In other news, Garret is also cute, Jed is honest, and Luke P is still lurking around creeping everyone out. Pretty classic Bachelorette, business as usual stuff. However, TTBP was joined by a special, lasst minute guest whose schedule is typically packed and it's a real miracle she found the time to squeeze in the pod. Make sure you listen to this episode for a once in a life time opportunity! Ciao!

It's the third week of Hannah B's journey to find love and apparently she has nothing to worry about because all of her guys are ANGELS with beautiful butts. What more could a girl want? This one over here is leaving love notes, that one over there is getting almost naked with snakes, and even the stalkers appear to be genuinely in love with her. Luckiest gal on the planet! Hannah has no problem trimming the fat though as she knows what she wants, and it's definitely not a tragic story. Hopefuly none of the men left lost a beloved cat in a fire.. or something along those lines. All we know is that any of these dudes would not handle pregnancy well, and TTBP thinks that's something to celebrate. Roll tide!

It's week two (technically one, if Sarah has anything to say about it) and the drama is in full swing. At the center of it all is Luke's polarizing physique and Cam's misguided ABC philosophy. Who doesn't love a conveyor belt of hot men calling other hot men out? Taylor Cox (Abby's) joins us this week to discuss the good, the bad and the subpar attempts at rhyming. While the dudes aren't busy chucking chicken nuggets at one another, Hannah is busy giving us the full spectrum of emotions. She's crying! She's annoyed! She's over-the-top horny! It's more compelling than the entire last season of GoT. And beyond it all,  we're left with the wisest advice of all....if you're going to fall, do it on you're ass, because it's funnier.

Hannah Beast is officially the bachelorette and all her guys are officially from Georgia. Except for that one from Florida. Either way, she is already proving to be one of the greatest Bachelorettes of all time, and TTBP is living for it. She is real. She is funny. She's had sex. What more could a man need?! Marc Muszynski joins this episode to share his controversial thoughts on the men, while Alex and Sarah share their controversial thoughts on women in general. Lets see if Hannah's season takes as weird as a turn as night one of TTBP did.

Is there literally any relationship on planet Earth that is more important than the one between 2 (or 15) Bachelorettes?! ABC sure doesn't think so. That's why they had to bring us the most "epic" reunion of all time that has ever been, and ever will be created!! While TTBP was pretty up-to-date on our beloved Bachelorettes, Bachelor Nation was unpleasantly surprised to hear back from some of the douche bags they thought they canceled back in the early 2000's. But if we learned anything from this reunion, it's that a woman is in fact capable of changing a damaged man. Ladies, if you can dream it, you can believe it! And thankfully we have Hannah Beast to carry us through the next journey. Roll Tide.