Umpire Pants

This is an all Mary and Kelley, all hints episode. I haven't listened to it but there is a very special guest in the second half.

I'm uploading this again as a separate episode, hoping more people will see it.

I UPLOADED THE WRONG FILE! This one actually has songs and shit. Super-Nutballs, please re-listen. XOOOO -Kelley

Happy Holidays. I guess this isn’t karaoke. We’re the Cohen Brothers of Podcasting. Air travel, talking to Atlanta. Cookie challenge. Malt Balls and Milk Duds. Special guest, dad is here! Milk Duds in the bathroom stall. Boys are gross. Banana bread horror story. Malt Ball cookies. Weird Christmas Tree Dealer. Christmas Trees, just put some branches in your car. Throwing stuff out your window. Christmas songs. Little Drummer Boys. Grandma Got Ran Over by a Reindeer. Christmas in Killarny. Sleigh Ride. Ernest Saves Christmas. Memorable Christmas Gifts. Factory Style Barbie Situation. You can wash stuffed animals. Hints. One last Christmas Song – Santa Baby. The index is involved. Cake sticking hint. W.C. Fields. Abbott and Costello. Paper for sticking cakes. Pared fruit hint. Bill won the guess. Weird vitamin hints! Umpire Pants Out.

I UPLOADED THE WRONG FILE! This one actually has songs and shit. Super-Nutballs, please re-listen. XOOOO -Kelley

Happy Holidays. I guess this isn’t karaoke. We’re the Cohen Brothers of Podcasting. Air travel, talking to Atlanta. Cookie challenge. Malt Balls and Milk Duds. Special guest, dad is here! Milk Duds in the bathroom stall. Boys are gross. Banana bread horror story. Malt Ball cookies. Weird Christmas Tree Dealer. Christmas Trees, just put some branches in your car. Throwing stuff out your window. Christmas songs. Little Drummer Boys. Grandma Got Ran Over by a Reindeer. Christmas in Killarny. Sleigh Ride. Ernest Saves Christmas. Memorable Christmas Gifts. Factory Style Barbie Situation. You can wash stuffed animals. Hints. One last Christmas Song – Santa Baby. The index is involved. Cake sticking hint. W.C. Fields. Abbott and Costello. Paper for sticking cakes. Pared fruit hint. Bill won the guess. Weird vitamin hints! Umpire Pants Out.

Kelley intros. Ambient noise. Air travel. Elon Musk is full of shit. Sloths riding bicycles. Cousin Power Hour (upcoming). Kelley can’t say auto-erotic asphyxiation. RIP Jerry Reed. Ape Call by Nervous Norvis (Jimmy Drake) 1956. Milk Dud cookies are good. Malt Ball cookies are upcoming. Upgrades in hotels. Mom can’t or won’t hear us. Herman has to watch gummy bears have sex every day. Catholic Church is bad, gummy bear sex is good and natural. JCMSUP Jesus Christ Made Seattle Under Protest [We got one of the “S” streets wrong, it’s Seneca, not Stewart]. Weird stuff mom does: Mom calls everything a machine. Bill and Kelley are going to hell. Jesus Christ Lizards. Amos Moses Break. Kelley’s Hint List. Use one high-watt bulb. Everyone says Bill all the time. Edmonton airport friendly employee. Un-lacquered brass tips. Experts say meat is meat. Painted furniture hint. Murphy’s Oil Soap. Borax. Grandma fashion. Umpire Pants out.

We didn’t do an episode last week. Raising Arizona. Black Friday and movies. Thanksgiving and too much gravy. Shout out to Edmonton. Mary’s Thanksgiving was terrible. The flu. Yo Momma. Broken fridge. Cats eating snakes. Simon had diabeetus and now he’s normal. Is mom farting? Lack of Anus. Crank it. How to make tofu from scratch. Paula Poundstone. Ticketmaster sucks balls. Squeeze the beans. Herman’s balls. Mom’s Marty McFlying. God damnit best ofs. Weird NW accent. Best of so far: Wind. La Bomba break. Wine, MD 20/20, Old English Special Reserve. Cartoon microwave sounds. Wonder, bread, The Warriors, wonder why Peg Bracken wrote this, Stonehenge. Kelley’s hint list. Re-use a bathinette, phone detective work, TV re-boots, polishing your hearth.

I didn't listen to much of this one, but i think I made the sound better. Or maybe it just sounds weird in a different way, I don't know. I was working on a car until long after dark so it's pretty impressive I'm uploading this at all.

We recorded this today and I didn't listen to it, but Kelley is back so we recorded at her house with Mary still in Costa Rica. We talk about snakes, flashers, eat peach rings, and we're back to Best of So Far and hints.

I didn't get around to listening to this one but the sound is better. Mary and Kelley are in Costa Rica and we talk about various topics.

Mary and Kelley are in Costa Rica, Mary is in a bad mood, beach day, worst sounding episode, car for Lily, fixing the sound, alley drinking, weather, Mary gets distracted, ranking animals, fishing for compliments, bad sound, red vines vs twizzlers, World Series, RIP Paul Allen, driving Miss Aunt Mary, power loss, more Aunt Mary, Vera joins us, the sound of your own voice, restaurants, more alley drinking, bicycle desserts, is Vera Bill's sister in law?, coco loco, we lose the connection, Jimmy "Warren" Buffet, wrapping up, Umpire Pants Out

61: What Are You, Willy Wonka?

Bill is back, Mary is not here, holiday episodes, upcoming episodes, Bill's camping trip, yogurt pants, Christy's email->robots and hot dogs->uncle willy/beer->turtles->robot costume->Velvet Underground song (The Gift)->prize, My Two Dads, confirmed bachelor, Gumby, laundry, old McDonald's commercials, BREAK 23:36, Kelley's Hint List: frosting cakes, tuning and voicing pianos, frozen door locks->public urination, keeping uncooked meats fresh and sweet, wrinkly velvet coats, handbag maintenance, bootleg Umpire Pants out