The Blair Witch! Oooh,  scary! It has symbols everywhere! The camera is shaking and they are scared and being picked off! We’re all shocked! But it’s rated R so we better not see your 16-year old behind in here! Unless you sneak in with a plate of chicken livers, and then you better share (And eat quick before it  stinks up the whole aisle!) Hand me that ketchup!

Here’s the weirdly high quality trailer!

Aaron Littleton is your host this week and he is hungry for some some gas station food. John Hurst is your co-host and and is about to edit the encyclopedia that anyone can edit.

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You ever just go to into your car (The passenger side, since you never get to ride in your own car. Enjoy the experience!) and just… Chill? Snoop Dogg does. Or maybe he’s riding in someone’s car and they went inside for a few minutes! Who knows! He could be in mid-transit to making the ratings pop on some show you’ve never watched (but know that Snoop Dogg is guest starring on!) Anyway, he’s listening to “Let It Go” off the Frozen soundtrack. Now we are too. And now, somehow, so are you.

John Hurst is your host this week and he’s not afraid of volcanoes. Aaron Littleton is your co-host and and already knows all the spoilers for 2020.

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Have you heard the tale of your local dentist down the block who will give you laughing gas whenever you want?! He’s a little more expensive than most, but he does the job! He’s got only a 3 star on Coruscant Review, but he’s trustworthy! I think he might also be the an emperor of evil or something? Not sure, don’t care! Cleans my teeth and I don’t feel a thing! Anyway, check out Palpy-ol’-Pal and tell ’em Obi sent ya!

This is that one scene from Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith where Palpatine tells a tale. Join us as we watch it on loop!

This week, Aaron Littleton is your host and he and does not think he ordered this fighter jet image in anime form. John Hurst is your co-host/hurst and he opens the door for you!

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What do you think Kenny Loggins is doing during quarantine? Do you think he’s doing the same thing he is doing in here in the music video for pinnacle song from the pinnacle soundtrack of our time, “Top Gun: Music From the Motion Picture”? Probably! Because it’s kind of not a great video! He’s just kind of lounging and playing with a camera that may or may not have film in it. What’s going to happen when you finally develop that roll, Kenny Loggins? Are you going to find a bunch of blurry pictures of your jean clothed junk you took from the bed and maybe an artsy pic of the ceiling fan? Because yes, that’s what you’re going to find! Go hang that in your household and charge people enormous prices for artistic integrity! And when you’re done, go scream at that ceiling fan some more, buy some adult pay-per-views movies and eschew them all to watch kickass fighter jets on the Military Channel. Ah, yes, now that’s the stuff.

John Hurst is hosting this week and he is reading from the book of nursery rhymes and The U.S. War Machine back to back. Aaron Littleton co-hosts and finds that fighter jet sexy enough to Bing.

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Is the Monterrey Jack Quesadilla date a first-rate date idea? Taco Bell sure thought so! Just as the goop from the bottom of the bag is scooped up into your mouth orifice, you may also experience the joy of a slightly spicy delight of Monterrey Jack cheese with your date on your low-rent sofa meant to fall apart after a dozen uses or so. Perhaps your even watching a music video the couch was in as your sitting on the couching consuming this goop with your date! Who knows! It’s the early 2000s and anything is possible in the fast food world. Your soul patch shines brightly on this day and you’re feeling lucky. Maybe you’re even playing a Smash Mouth song declaring how much of the percentage of the star you feel (Maybe… All of it?) It’s your time, you’re going to have a good time and then this couch is going to fall apart and you’re going to have to call Joey again. Such is life! Let’s get this day started!

Aaron hosts this week and has a scheme and doesn’t even know it! John co-hosts and is looking at things with the word gamer in them out of desperation.

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Sometimes, you gotta make that sale. And in the cereal world, making that sale is hard. The Rice Krispie guys got a corner on the air puff and desert market. Tony the Tiger knows his stuff is addicting and doesn’t care who he peddles it to because he stands by his product. And we’re still need entirely sure what the Honey Comb Robot actually did (Other than proclaiming that taste is big big big and definitely not small, no no no.) The Honey Nuts Cheerio Bee needed that commission money to help endorse his 80s lifestyle and who could he turn to in this trying time to make the deal other than to get  Hulk Hogan getting addicted to nuts and honey in his cereal. He proclaims it better than a bodyslam, but which end of the bodyslam is it? Find out with us!

John Hurst is your host and he has a secret Food City regional grocery store he goes to. Aaron Littleton is your co-host and he is respectfully watching people do sick dirt bike tricks at a reasonable distance.

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As a bonus for reading all the way to here, you can watch a show from last year from the improv troupe  Einstein Simplified, which Aaron Littleton (Your co-host) is in! Check it out here and follow the documentary he is in, Chair the Movie, on facebook!

Have you seen Speed 2? We sure haven’t. I mean, we’ve seen the trailer yes, but the movie, not so much. Why? What was it about a franchise that lost one of its temporal B-listers and replaced him with boats (ships?) that makes even the truly uncultured such as us lose interest?

This week we watched the Speed 2 trailer on loop, but no more or less than 55 times!

Aaron Littleton hosts and buys some soap! John Hurst co-hosts and wears some pants!

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Where were you when the new Sakura Wars theme song dropped? Were you watching online? Were you in the audience? Were you, most horrifyingly of all, on…stage? Yeeeesh.

This week we watched the New Sakura Wars theme song reveal video on loop! Well, mostly anyway.

John Hurst hosts and trims and beard. Aaron Littleton co-hosts and is not very prescient.

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Whatever you do, do not bing shiny hands. Don’t do it. It’s…it’s not good. Don’t turn off safe search. What are you doing. I said don’t do that. STOP STOP STOP

YOU DON’T NEED TO DO THIS

It’s an intermission! We’re in our respective homes. There’s not really a host and there’s no video. But there is us, talking about the same thing as everybody else so, you know.

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I want to tell you about these so-called “humans”, with their so-called “boats”. They dangle…dangle’s the right word right? They dangle worms, the juiciest you’ve ever seen, right down here in our faces. IN OUR FACES! But let me tell you friends, these worms are not what they seem. Oh no, not at all. Not at all. These worms are tricks. Turn around, listen to me, just turn around and swim. SWIM FOR ALL YOU ARE WORTH! Swim, you idiots! Back after these fine sponsors.

This week we watched some fishing show bloopers! These fishing show bloopers, actually. You should too!

Aaron Littleton hosts this week and sees a statue. John Hurst co-hosts and fishes on Twitch.

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