January 13, 2022

Why It Feels Like Your Art Making Always Comes Last EP-259

28 minutes

We ALL have multi-faceted lives. We are both artists AND a plethora of other wonderful things. Parents. Partners. Siblings. Friends. Do you ever feel like your art is constantly on the back burner to everything else in your life? Like your creativity is getting lost in a sea of everyone else’s needs and wants? I’ve been there and I want to help you find a healthy balance so that every area of your life gets the attention it deserves. Join me as I share five reasons why it feels like making art should always come last. Outline of This Episode

[0:56] Signs you are putting your creativity in last place
[3:29] Learning how to say NO
[5:52] Breaking down self-care stigmas
[9:46] Why you never have time for yourself
[16:58] Breaking the people-pleasing cycle
[23:41] Why your art is valuable

Your time is valuable

Have you ever said to yourself, “I would love to make more art, but I just don’t have enough time.” If that sounds like you, may I offer this paradigm shift? You do, in fact, have enough time. You just constantly fill it with other people’s problems because you think their time is more valuable than yours. If you don’t see your time as valuable you will never respect it. It won’t matter if you have already carved out the time to paint or express your creativity. Something else will always interrupt or take priority over your art if you don’t start setting and sticking to healthy boundaries. But none of those boundaries will stay in place if you don’t first believe that your time is valuable and worth protecting.

It’s okay to say NO

Do you have a hard time saying no to others? Have you ever asked yourself why? It largely has to do with the fact that we think we are responsible for other people’s feelings. We’re conditioned this way! As children, we’re constantly told not to do this or that because it will hurt someone's feelings. The truth is we can’t make someone feel anything. They decide how they feel based on their own interpretations. This isn’t an invitation to be rude or unkind. You can kindly say no, set boundaries, and STILL have a great amount of love and respect for the other person while doing the same for yourself. We have to allow other people to experience their emotions and realize we are not responsible if they don’t handle them well. All we can do is be kind to others and authentic to ourselves.

Real life happens in the gray

It’s a common misconception that self-care and doing anything for yourself will turn you into a self-obsessed monster. This is because our minds often live in black and white, but real life happens in the gray! It doesn’t have to be this OR that. We can hold two things in our hands at the same time. This is where both/and thinking is crucial. We can love and care for others AND love and care for ourselves. We can be BOTH good parents and passionate artists. I want to invite you to add primary colors to the palette of your life. Think about how many colors you can mix with those six colors and white. Too many to count, right? Remember that when your mind gets stuck in binary thinking. Self-care doesn’t mean only doing things for yourself and never making concessions or compromising. You can take care of yourself while being kind and loving to the people you care about most in your life.

Resources Mentioned on this episode