1. get misty-eyed at emotional shit.
2. bore her with details.
3. constantly let her re-frame.
4. buy her drinks, outside of a date context.
5. compliment her gratuitously.
6. talk about your hobbies with oblivious enthusiasm.
7. never ask her a question.
9. let her see your shit-eating smile.
10. accede to her manipulative horseshit.
11. never, ever say “horseshit” in conversation.
More anti-game behaviors and traits:
12. Constantly remind her how happy you are to be with her.
13. Laugh at your own jokes.
14. Laugh uproariously at her “jokes”.
15. Feed her need for gossip.
16. Put up with her shit an order of magnitude more frequently than she puts up with your shit.
17. Ask yes or no or one-word answer type questions.
18. Act contrite when she catches you checking out her body.
19. Stare, look away, stare, look away, stare, look away.
20. Ask her if she has a condom.
21. Cuddle her so long that she is the one to first start wriggling free.
22. Hold in farts around her until your colon bursts.
23. Fidget, talk fast, mumble, lean in, babble tiresomely like a girl who has a heavy emotional burden to unload.
24. Talk incessantly about the state of the relationship.
25. Whine about how hard life is.
26. Betray too much enthusiasm when she tells you about something cool she did.
27. Act impressed with her educational credentials or career success.
28. Sympathize with her bitching about badboy exes.
29. Agree to her tacit sex timetable.
30. Get wrathfully jealous every time she checks out a dude or talks about another guy.
31. Spitefully berate her genuine accomplishments.
32. Say crap like “I don’t deserve you” with sincerity.
34. Drop everything you like to do to do everything she likes to do.
35. Wanly smile when she denigrates you to her friends.
36. Make videos like this nauseating beta dweeb trying to win an ex- back.
37. Resort to saying “I suppose you’re right” every time she accuses you of some character defect.
38. Constantly, and insipidly, ask her if she “likes it this way” during lovemaking.
39. Forget the art of plain old fucking.
40. Turn to face her fully as soon as you open a girl. Stay that way while she continues giving you her profile.
41. Buying girls drinks as a MEANS OF OPENING THEM.
42. Muck up cold reads until they sound like interrogations.
43. Show up more than five minutes early for dates.
44. Go for the night-ending kiss, get denied, follow up by shouting at her as she’s leaving that you’ll call her.
45. Skip on the way home after a “successful” date that did not end in sex.
46. Apologize for infractions she has not even accused you of.
47. Support feminism. Make a big show of it.
48. Ingratiate yourself to her.
49. Know a little too much about the TV wasteland, articles in the Style section of any major newspaper, or women’s fashion.
50. Make breakfast for her after the first night together.
51. Follow her from bar to bar.
52. Join her plans instead of inviting her to join your plans.
53. Agree to meet her friends before you have sexed her.
54. Wait in the exact same spot for her to return after she has told you she’ll be gone for ten minutes.
55. Pine over, or disparage, your ex on a first date.
56. Listen to her intently when she talks about her exes.
57. Always follow her conversational lead.
58. Touch her hair too soon.
59. Sit with your legs crossed. Acceptable only if you are an office executive.
60. Sweat profusely from anything other than vigorous exercise, sex or fighting.
61. Eagerly say yes to every one of her requests.
62. Be hopelessly indecisive.
