WTBI

Why hello there! Come on over here and sit a spell, why don't you? Have you ever heard the tale of Johnny Flaxseed?

Well get fucking ready. 

Also in this episode: Steak-cation, The Nice Holiday and the sex number, Alumiyum, Basically just Sham-wow, Gnome Defense Force - There's Safety in Numbers, The World Fair, Kiss Clock.

During the time of holiday cheer, the WTBI family would like to extend a warm season’s greetings to you and yours. We have prepared many surprises for you in this - our first christmastime episode. Enjoy our performance of Mark’s reading of The Night Before Podcast and our sweet-ass cover of your favorite Christmas tunes. 

This is an Official Notice from WTBI headquarters that WTBI would like to wish you a Happy but non legally binding Thanksgiving.

This week WTBI has prepared for you: The Thanksgiving Slime - the new solution to post meal cleanup and The Turkey Club - the hottest new dance scene for Thanksgiving Eve ragers - also a sandwich. Jarrett proposes the Hot Rod (TM) to perfectly cook your turkey. John pitches Dough Pro - a satisfying office breakfast alternative. We workshop The Nutshell: In a Nutshell: Save your nuts, and finally, we discuss the very sad official tournament rules for Strip Magic.

Also discussed in this episode: Cordmaid.com, Top Turkey, Turkey Blow, Bescalate it!, Say Baby, Jive, Turkey Wash, and Love Rake (Kind of?).

Do you believe in magic? Join us this week at WTBI headquarters where we initiate our plan to make magic real. We create Psych Up, the solution to your pre-date jitters. We defend your right to have Hot Knives. We design a new retail system where you can play it safe or let it ride. And who can forget about Gustar!

Also mentioned in this episode: Umbrella Drones, new and improved  fingernails clippers, Dry Language, Snore Pen, and Party Plow.

PS: Kelsey is the true genius. 

*Ghost Voice* - Prepare for a scare in today's Spooktacular episode. Mark has prepared a new haunting intro for you all. John has prepared a terrifying new take on the murder mystery dinner party in the form of Stake Dinner (TM). Jarrett proposes a spookalicious syrup to negate the effects of asparagus on your pee. And Kelsey pitches WTBI's newest hair-raising hit television series - Teeth. And perhaps scariest of all, we discover that two members of the podcast pronounce the word "Buffet" like craAaAAaaAzy people.

Also featured in this episode: The rules of improv, The Always Pumpkin, Winnie the Pooh - in terms of fashion, End of the Rainbow Honey, Satisfied Tie, and Squash Pin.

Happy Halloween!

This week our intrepid explorers (Mark, Jarrett, John, and Kelsey) discover Skin Budz (TM) - the most effective and disturbing solution to in-meeting boredom, Cutie-cle (TM) - the most effective and distrubing solution to cleaning delicate cookwear, and Singular.com (TM) - the one of a kind online store for one of a kind online products. Jarrett also pitches an idea for quieter snacks and Mark takes us on some kind of weird LSD driven trip down to the molecular level of the potato chip. John goes 100% Corpo and Kelsey proposes Trelace (TM) - a great way to get the word out about your success in life without being perceived as a braggart. Then we wrap it up by blasting off in a very british fashion.

John couldn't make it to this recording. But don't worry. He's definitely for sure alive. Also,  Mark, Kelsey, and Jarrett have got you covered. This week we bring Boulder Shoulders - the intimidating suit implants designed to solve problems of being rudely interuptted when speaking. We also discuss food halls, a new brand of pet doors called Scooch, Rub Flavor - the customizable rub enhancing system, and we do our best to get Scott off. For free!