"Rat accrual." After a couple crucial Caps updates, Kelly, Rave, and Eva pour one out for our dead Dallas Stars (and say sayonara to goalie mistreater Pete DeBoer), have an unexpectedly heated discussion about the handshake line, celebrate the Brad Marchand of it all as Florida takes on Edmonton again, and pull a few tarot cards to see what we're in for. This episode was recorded on June 8, 2025.

Timecodes: (3:03) Ground Rules | (16:12) Caps chat | (28:59) Conference Finals | (46:43) Stanley Cup Final | (1:04:20) Impromptu tarot reading

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"Tragedy of the Mitch commons." As Round 2 fades fast from our short-term memories, Rave, Eva, and Kelly take the collective temperature about the Caps lowkey crash-out, crack open the rich tome of of The Maple Leafs' Whole Deal to analyze some themes, and hitch wagons to their preferred steed as we sally forth to the conference finals. This episode was recorded on May 19, 2025.

Timecodes: (3:01) Caps vs. Canes | (37:40) Leafs vs. Panthers | (1:09:51) Stars vs. Jets | (1:21:26) Oilers vs. Golden Knights

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"The art of deception and pageantry." Round 1? She's done. Finished. Eva, Kelly, and Rave bid the eliminated teams a respectful farewell, weigh in on various and sundry shenanigans that occurred throughout, and look Round 2 right in the eye. Plus: The only person more desperate than Jim Rutherford to talk aloud in public about the Canucks right now is Kelly lol. This episode was recorded on May 5, 2025.

Timecodes: (3:22) Caps vs. Habs | (26:59) Stars vs. Avs | (38:16) Oilers vs. Kings | (41:23) Golden Knights vs. Wild | (45:48) Canes vs. Devs | (50:08) Panthers vs. Bolts | (55:28) Maple Leafs vs. Sens | (1:00:23) Jets vs. Blues | (1:07:38) Looking ahead to Round 2 | (1:21:07) Kelly’s Canucks Corner

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"They stupidassbitch'd this." IT'S PLAYOFFS TIIIIIIME and Kelly, Eva, and Rave are doing FINE! THANK YOU FOR ASKING!! This one's a little all over the place as we check in on the Caps vs. the ghosts of 2010, the ongoing failures of the Vancouver Canucks, the triumphant return of Gabe Landeskog, our end-of-season awards recipients, and much much more. This episode was recorded on April 19, 2025.

Timecodes: (4:37) Caps chat | (35:00) Our end-of-season awards | (41:28) The Canucks | (53:00) Son of Brind'amour | (58:00) Gabe's back, but will Nicke ever be?! | (1:08:49) Playoffs preview

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"Euthanasia like a horse." We weren't supposed to record this week but, welp, he did it. By "he," we mean Ovi. And by "it," we mean "Finally killed W*yne Gr*tzky." Sorry to that old man. This very special episode was recorded on April 8, 2025.

Timecodes: (6:55) Goal #894 | (18:22) Goal #895

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"Taste that pit." Eva checks in with Kelly and Rave about the latest in the world of the Washington Capitals, including some clever losses, some new Chychrun wellness theories, Protas ascendency, the signing of a new boy, and the return of a beloved color commenter. Plus: The Old Slut Playoffs and a farewell to Torts. This episode was recorded on March 31, 2025.

Timecodes: (2:29) Nominative Determinism | (9:55) Caps chat | (50:23) Elsewhere in the NHL

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"Team breakfasts won't save you." This season's trade deadline really insisted upon itself, you know? Kelly, Rave, and Eva take a look at the goings-on to sort the Goofuses (Mikko to DAL, Brad to FLA, Rick Tocchet generally) from the Gallants (Fleury vs. Pens, Bedard vs. refs, the Capitals generally). This episode was recorded on March 17, 2025.

Timecodes: (2:40) Fight Songs | (11:16) Trade deadline | (14:12) Mikko Rantanan | (19:55) The Canucks | (34:49) Brad Marchand | (53:25) Erik Johnson | (56:37) Caps chat | (1:50:20) Fleury vs. the Pens | (1:16:50) Connor Bedard vs. the refs

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“He's a soup combo for sure." This podcast has been marked safe from being scored on by Alex Ovechkin! But hopefully not for long. Kelly, Rave, and Eva check in on the Caps’ mAgiCaL cHemIsTrY, the poetry of the Gr8 Chase, the power of the Flyer’s Last Supper, the darksided energy of Connor McDavid’s McNightmare, and the Canucks’ various missteps. This episode was recorded on March 2, 2025.

Timecodes: (3:42) Boybanding | (23:32) Caps chat | (42:53) Elsewhere in the NHL

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"I’ve seen that vest before." Have y'all heard about this Four Nations Face-Off thing? Rave, Eva, and Kelly tried to ignore it like its organizers ignored the Washington Capitals, but we should've known there'd be too much silliness for your hosts to avoid having opinions about for long. This episode was recorded on February 17, 2025.

Timecodes: (4:29) Please Enjoy All Hockeys Equally [aka Severance Music] | (14:17) Caps chat | (35:44) This week in Four Nations | (51:32) Kelly's Canucks Corner

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"Confuses the eye and the mind." Our wonderful Kelly is ill, which means the loons are in charge of the asylum over here. Rave and Eva discuss the Capitals' agape love and nachos on ice, then weigh in on the Avs sending Mikko away (and freeing Taylor Hall in the process); the Canucks sending JT to hell; the Flyers sending those children to Calgary; and - dun dun DUNNN - the return of T*ny D*angelo to the NHL. Sigh.This episode was recorded on February 2, 2025.

Timecodes: (4:31) How To??? | (21:47) Caps chat | (48:47) Elsewhere in the NHL"