In this episode, I sit down with Tamara Pietzke, a mental health therapist best known for having blown the whistle on gender affirming care this past February in a Free Press article. What has she been up to since then?

We discuss the complexities of therapists being pressured to rubber stamp gender identities and recommend medical interventions. Tamara shares her experiences challenging the status quo and the backlash she faced for questioning the rush to affirm identities.

We explore the ethical dilemmas therapists face when young clients demand immediate medicalization, and confront the myths surrounding suicide risk and prevention in the transgender population. How do we navigate the fine line between supporting individuals in the moment and ensuring their long-term well-being? The conversation touches on the hot-cold empathy gap, the sunk cost fallacy, and the conveyor-belt nature of the gender industry, shedding light on the challenges of helping vulnerable youth in today's society.

Join us as we unravel the layers of social contagion, neuroplasticity, and the impact of social transitioning on young minds. Can therapy provide a safe space for exploration beyond immediate demands for medical interventions? Tune in to discover how therapists like Tamara navigate the delicate balance of protecting the holistic health of their clients.

Tamara is a mental health therapist (licensed independent clinical social worker) and has been a therapist for twelve years. She has worked a number of places, but most recently was working at Multicare, one of the state's largest hospital systems, for the past six years. When she raised concerns about the shift towards mandated "gender affirming care," she was bullied and dismissed. She stopped working there January of 2024, a couple weeks before her whistleblowing article came out in the Free Press. From Multicare, she went to another practice, but they let her go after three weeks, the same week the article came out, simply saying she wasn't "the right fit for the position." She has since been working on building a private practice. Meanwhile, the state is now investigating her license on account of not being "gender affirming.”

Links & Resources:
Free Press article 1
Free Press article 2
City Journal article
Give Send Go
Pietzke Counseling
 

00:00 Start

[00:01:10] Gender affirming care concerns

[00:07:11] Gender-affirming therapy for teenagers.

[00:12:25] Symbolic exploration of identity.

[00:14:25] Gender identity exploration challenges.

[00:17:48] Suicide risk and gender-affirming care.

[00:20:51] Teenagers and parental involvement.

[00:27:02] Therapists' reaction to detransitioners.

[00:29:10] Therapists' reaction to differing views.

[00:31:27] The gray area in ethics.

[00:36:59] Challenges in therapy practice.

[00:40:21] The hot cold empathy gap.

[00:44:05] Conversion therapy and gender identity.

[00:45:05] Gender dysphoria and identity confusion.

[00:48:57] Power dynamics in adolescence.

[00:53:35] Navigating marketing in therapy.

[00:59:10] Ethics of helping endangered children.

[00:59:29] Detransitioning concerns in youth.

[01:05:03] Ethics in Therapy

[01:08:28] Whistleblowers and support network.

[01:10:50] Gender crisis.

To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!

Learn more about Do No Harm.

Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.

Take 20% off all superfood beverages with code SOMETHERAPIST at Organifi.

Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.

Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.

Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration.

Have a question for me? Looking to go deeper and discuss these ideas with other listeners? Join my Locals community! Members get to ask questions I will respond to in exclusive, members-only livestreams, post questions for upcoming guests to answer, plus other perks TBD.

LaRell and Valerie Herbert are a married couple with a very unique story. During their time together, LaRell first believed he was a transgender woman and went through full sex trait modification before awakening to self-acceptance as a man. 

Join us as we explore their journey through somatic psychology and psychedelic integration. How did their relationship withstand the challenges of detransitioning, medical trauma, and identity crises? What impact did their individual traumas have on their journey? 

Discover the intricate dynamics of their blended family and the unexpected twists that unfolded as they navigated the medical pipeline of gender transition. How did their experiences with therapists and surgeons shape their perspectives on identity and healing? Tune in to uncover the profound insights and personal growth that emerged from their transformative journey.

Valerie is a somatic trauma-informed mentor and teacher. She is an earth ceremonialist and weaves wisdom through understanding and learning more about our innate goodness and wildness from connection with Mother Earth and learning from her elements. Although she is classically trained as a systems thinker and understands theoretical approaches and methods of healing trauma, she finds that creating a deep, loving, consistent, and safe relationship and container is how people heal. Valerie helps people remember the wholeness of who they are.

LaRell Herbert is a former transwoman who lived for years believing he was a female born in the wrong body. This belief led him to pursue hormone replacement therapy in 2017 at 36 and gender reassignment surgery in 2019, despite being married to a loving and supportive woman. Through introspection and self-growth, LaRell realized his gender identity was rooted in childhood trauma. In October 2023, he de-transitioned and returned to living as his biologically male self. His journey through trans ideology and lived experience as a trans woman has made him acutely aware of the tragedies young people face when sold the idea of medical transition for happiness. LaRell and his wife Valerie aim to raise awareness about the impact of transition on spouses and family members, recognizing that while transition is a personal choice, it significantly affects those around you.

Books mentioned in this episode:

• "The Body Keeps the Score" by Bessel van der Kolk
• "The End of Gender" by Debra Soh

 00:00 Start

[00:00:00] Identity exploration and transition journey.

[00:05:30] Shame and trauma in childhood.

[00:11:45] Discovering transgender identity.

[00:14:10] Inner dissonance in marriage.

[00:18:51] Repression and trauma in relationships.

[00:23:02] Transition and addiction parallels.

[00:25:46] Taking female hormones' impact.

[00:30:42] Hormone effects on emotionality.

[00:33:45] Femininity and bone mass.

[00:38:17] Fear of suicide and transition.

[00:41:22] Blended family challenges.

[00:44:32] Relational healing and gender ideology.

[00:52:20] Vaginoplasty experiences and complications.

[00:53:02] Post-surgical challenges in transitioning.

[00:57:08] Gender identity and self-love.

[01:01:19] Dissociation and body acceptance.

[01:07:00] Gender identity and transition journey.

[01:09:58] Gender identity realization.

[01:12:55] The journey of self-discovery.

[01:17:30] Unique life path and experiences.

[01:22:16] Men's initiation retreats.

[01:24:43] Best friends with therapist.

[01:30:25] Real-life relationships and complications.

[01:31:51] The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care.

To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!

Learn more about Do No Harm.

Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.

Take 20% off all superfood beverages with code SOMETHERAPIST at Organifi.

Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.

Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.

Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration.

Have a question for me? Looking to go deeper and discuss these ideas with other listeners? Join my Locals community! Members get to ask questions I will respond to in exclusive, members-only livestreams, post questions for upcoming guests to answer, plus other perks TBD.

In this episode, I dive into a fascinating conversation with Dr. Camilo Ortiz about a groundbreaking concept he coined as "independence therapy." Dr. Ortiz shares insights on how giving kids age-appropriate responsibilities and freedoms can help them overcome anxiety. We discuss the evolution of this idea from classic exposure therapy to empowering kids with independence. How does this therapy work, and what age group is it suitable for? Dr. Ortiz reveals the surprising results and the potential impact on children's anxiety levels.

We explore the importance of allowing kids to experience discomfort, danger, distress, and disappointment to build resilience. Dr. Ortiz shares real-life examples of how parents can support their children in developing independence, highlighting the risks of overprotective parenting. What are the risks of inaction, and how can parents strike a balance between safety and independence? We also touch on the legal aspects of children's independence and the role of parents in fostering self-reliance.

Join us as we uncover the hidden benefits of independence therapy and discuss practical strategies for parents to empower their children. Discover how small changes in parenting approaches can have a significant impact on children's confidence and self-reliance. Are you ready to learn how to support your child's journey towards independence and resilience? Tune in to this episode for valuable insights and actionable tips from Dr. Camilo Ortiz.

Camilo Ortiz, Ph.D., is an associate professor and director of clinical training in the clinical psychology doctoral program at Long Island University-Post. He is also a fellow with the Flourishing in Action project at the Archbridge Institute’s Human Flourishing Lab. His scholarship focuses on parenting, disruptive behavior problems in children, child anxiety, elimination disorders, and cognitive behavior therapy for child and adult psychiatric disorders. He completed a pre-doctoral internship at Montefiore Medical Center and a postdoctoral research fellowship at Stony Brook before joining the faculty at LIU-Post in 2001. He teaches cognitive-behavior therapy (CBT) and evidence-based treatment of children and adolescents. Dr. Ortiz is a licensed psychologist in New York State and maintains a private psychology practice where he sees adults and children. He received a Ph.D. in clinical psychology from the University of Massachusetts, Amherst. DrCamiloOrtiz.com

X: @DrCamiloOrtiz

Treating Childhood Anxiety with a Mega-Dose of Independence - Profectus Magazine
New York Times article

Books recommended on this show can always be found at sometherapist.com/bookshop. Thank you for purchases that support the show!

 00:00 Start

[00:01:38] Independence therapy for anxious kids.

[00:07:16] Children's decline in mixed-age play.

[00:11:17] Independence activities for children.

[00:13:37] Changing parenting dynamics over generations.

[00:18:25] Developing sense of competence.

[00:22:11] Broken bone resilience discovery.

[00:25:28] The four Ds for kids.

[00:28:05] Trust in Independence Activities.

[00:33:42] Interacting with kids in society.

[00:37:41] Parental support and independence.

[00:41:04] The risks of inaction.

[00:44:00] Kids needing practice with danger.

[00:49:53] Independence and life skills.

[00:52:40] Therapist's role in politics.

[00:55:21] Therapist referral service and talks.

[01:00:07] Generational differences and media influence.

[01:03:23] Living life consistent with values.

[01:09:15] Therapists' online presence discussed.

[01:13:16] Gender-Affirming Care.

TALK TO ME: book a discovery call.

LOCALS: Ask questions of me & guests; get early access to new episodes + exclusive content. Join my community.

SUPPORT THE SHOW: subscribe, like, comment, & share or donate.

DO NO HARM: join our community of concerned professionals.

EIGHTSLEEP: Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST.

ORGANIFI: Take 20% off Organifi with code SOMETHERAPIST.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration. 

SHOW NOTES & transcript with help from SwellAI.

MUSIC: Thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude & permission. 

To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!

Learn more about Do No Harm.

Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.

Take 20% off all superfood beverages with code SOMETHERAPIST at Organifi.

Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.

Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.

Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration.

Have a question for me? Looking to go deeper and discuss these ideas with other listeners? Join my Locals comm...

I sit down with three remarkable gentlemen to discuss the complexities of black fatherhood in America. Speaking from their hearts, Adam, Mike and Jeremiah share how it has shaped their characters to embrace the responsibilities, challenges, and blessings of fatherhood. They critically examine societal norms, narratives, and myths that keep black families in survival mode, and explore what it truly means to “do your best” as a parent.

As the conversation unfolds, we touch on the concept of generational curses versus generational choices. Are we destined to repeat the mistakes of our ancestors, or do we have the power to make different decisions and break free from the cycle? We delve into the importance of hope and resilience in the black community, highlighting the need for healing and self-awareness to overcome past traumas and societal limitations.

Join us as we navigate through the complexities of fatherhood, resilience, and societal expectations. How can parents empower themselves and their children to break free from the constraints of generational curses and embrace a future filled with hope and possibility?

Adam B. Coleman is the Author of “Black Victim To Black Victor”, Op-Ed Writer, Public Speaker, host of the “Breaking Bread” video series, and the Founder of Wrong Speak Publishing. Adam is a columnist for Human Events, a frequent contributor for The New York Post and has articles published in Newsweek, The Telegraph, The Federalist, The Epoch Times, Daily Mail, The Post Millennial, Unherd, The Publica, ScoonTV, Free Black Thought, Life News HQ & Human Defense Initiative. Substack

Twitter: @wrong_speak

Michael David Cobb Bowen is a Stoic writer, data engineer and author of the award-winning blog Cobb. He has been published in Newsweek and was a regular NPR contributor, host at Cafe Utne, founder of the Conservative Brotherhood, Rights Universal and Free Black Thought. His online writing projects on political, cultural and philosophical subjects reach back over 23 years. His latest project, Stoic Observations, can be found at mdcbowen.substack.com. 

Jeremiah Wallace is a health coach and founder of RenewYou Health & Fitness. Over the last seven years, he has supported his clients to achieve renewal in their bodies, minds and behaviors. He is also host of the podcast Blended - Navigating The Blended Family Experience. As a stepparent himself, Jeremiah supports stepfamilies and those that are facing the complexities that exist within the blended family unit. His desire is for parents to have the clarity, competence and conviction necessary to lead well and to walk in purpose for their families. https://linktr.ee/jeremiahwallace

Books written by guests of this show can always be found at sometherapist.com/bookshop. Or follow the Amazon affiliate links below for books mentioned in this episode. Thank you for purchases that support the show!

Black Victim to Black Victor by Adam B. Coleman

 00:00 Start

[00:00:21] Fatherhood myths and realities.

[00:06:09] Fatherhood and personal growth.

[00:11:13] The impact of fatherlessness.

[00:12:13] Importance of family structure.

[00:16:33] Fatherhood myths and misconceptions.

[00:22:10] Family dynamics and relationships.

[00:27:13] Parenting challenges and gender dysphoria.

[00:31:20] Generational curses.

[00:33:09] Fatherhood and challenging stereotypes.

[00:39:13] Living a life without hope.

[00:41:25] Learning from privilege vs. trauma.

[00:45:56] Generational curses.

[00:51:17] Getting out of survival mode.

[00:56:21] Learning from parental struggles.

[00:57:15] Building discipline and success.

[01:03:33] The breakdown of marriage.

[01:06:11] Commitment and relationship standards.

[01:09:47] Shame and celebrity culture.

[01:14:44] Impact of fathers on daughters.

[01:20:21-01:20:32] Crisis of identity and values.

[01:24:37] Ancestry and identity crisis.

[01:26:08] Parental Responsibility and Guilt.

[01:30:13] Forgiveness and self-improvement.

[01:34:24] Gender crisis and community dialogue.

TALK TO ME: book a discovery call.

LOCALS: Ask questions of me & guests; get early access to new episodes + exclusive content. Join my community.

SUPPORT THE SHOW: subscribe, like, comment, & share or donate.

DO NO HARM: join our community of concerned professionals.

EIGHTSLEEP: Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST.

ORGANIFI: Take 20% off Organifi with code SOMETHERAPIST.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration. 

SHOW NOTES & transcript with help from SwellAI.

MUSIC: Thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude & permission. 

To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!

Learn more about Do No Harm.

Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.

Take 20% off all superfood beverages with code SOMETHERAPIST at Organifi.

Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.

Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.

Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20%

I sit down with Maia Poet, a 24-year-old Israeli-American writer, researcher, and public speaker with an extraordinary story. Maia began identifying as transgender at the tender age of 12 and recently desisted from this identity after living as a man in the Middle East for several years. What led her to this profound change? How did her experiences in Israel and Palestine shape her understanding of gender and identity?

Maia shares her harrowing escape from the October 7th attacks, narrowly avoiding the chaos due to a last-minute change in plans. What was it like to be on the brink of such a life-altering event? How did her involvement in peace activism between Jewish and Arab children influence her worldview? Maia paints a vivid picture of the optimism and innocence that existed just before the world around her was shattered.

We delve into Maia's unique cultural background, exploring how her Russian Jewish roots and her deep connection to Arab culture influenced her journey. How did studying Arabic and immersing herself in Middle Eastern culture help her reconnect with her Jewish identity? And what role did her trans identification play in her integration into both religious Muslim-Palestinian and Orthodox-Jewish communities?

Join us as we navigate through Maia's compelling narrative, from her early intellectual obsessions to her life-changing experiences in Israel. How did a chance encounter in a West Bank coffee shop and an unexpected Bar Mitzvah at the Western Wall cement her male identity? And what ultimately led her to desist from her trans identity? Tune in to hear Maia's fascinating story and gain insights into the complex interplay of culture, identity, and survival.

Maia Poet is a 24 year old Israeli-American writer, researcher and public speaker. She began identifying as transgender at the age of 12, and has recently desisted from a trans identity which has lasted for half of her life. Maia is reflecting on her experiences of desistance, in hopes of providing insight for young people struggling with gender distress and, for their parents.  

Twitter/X: @thepeacepoet99

Maia's YouTube channel

Speech for Detrans Awareness Day

Book co-authored with Israeli social worker, Tal Croitoru, based on Maia’s life and journey of desistance, Lia's Journey

 00:00 Start

[00:00:21] Challenging beliefs about body image.

[00:03:50] Peaceful coexistence among Israeli kids.

[00:10:25] Youthful optimism in challenging times.

[00:15:32] Building bridges between communities.

[00:18:53] Interconnectedness of Jewish and Arab cultures.

[00:21:52] An intergenerational longing for connection.

[00:24:18] A rare pituitary tumor.

[00:29:10] Discovering newfound physical sensations.

[00:33:14] Cultural and social influences.

[00:37:16] Identity and political alignment.

[00:41:09] Gender identity realization.

[00:43:49] Bar Mitzvah surprise.

[00:49:29] Maia is looking to mingle.

[00:51:50] LARPing as an Orthodox Jewish man.

[00:55:39] Pro-Palestinian views and differences.

[00:57:54] Paradigm-shifting realization about anti-Zionism.

[01:03:34] Regrets of transition journey.

[01:06:14] Detransitioning experiences.

[01:09:14] Gender identity realization.

[01:13:18] Re-envisioning identity post-transition.

[01:19:34] Gender ideology and children's books.

[01:20:16] Gender identity exploration journey.

To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!

Learn more about Do No Harm.

Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.

Take 20% off all superfood beverages with code SOMETHERAPIST at Organifi.

Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.

Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.

Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration.

Have a question for me? Looking to go deeper and discuss these ideas with other listeners? Join my Locals community! Members get to ask questions I will respond to in exclusive, members-only livestreams, post questions for upcoming guests to answer, plus other perks TBD.

Many cultural critics have expressed a mounting concern about prevalent attitudes that promote fragile mentalities, potentially crippling a generation and leaving them underprepared for the demands of adult life. Today’s roundtable panel brings together experts in mental health, social work, and social-emotional learning to discuss these concerns. How do narratives about our ability to bounce back from adversity shape our mental health and impact our outcomes? 

The discussion touches on the importance of self-awareness and the practice of mindfulness in strengthening our emotional resilience. But what happens when our nervous system goes haywire, and we can't trust our emotions? How do we navigate through moments of distress and disorientation? 

The guests share personal experiences and insights on how to cultivate mental fitness in a world filled with fear and self-censorship. Join us as we unravel the complexities of emotional well-being and resilience in the modern age.

Jake Wiskerchen, LMFT owns and operates Zephyr Wellness in northern Nevada and serves on the board of Walk the Talk America. His emotional functioning videos mentioned in this episode can be found here. Follow him at Twitter/X: @jakewisk 

Zander Keig, LCSW, is an award-winning social worker, speaker, caregiver, and educator who presents sought-after emotional well-being webinars and hosts the popular Umbrella Hour podcast. Zander co-founded the LGBTQ Caregiver Center, publishes change-maker stories at Third Space Press, and serves as a Caregiving.com LGBT Expert and Pride 365 Champion.

Jason Littlefield is an educator and advocate for personal well-being and societal well-being. He is the author of Empowered Humanity Theory: A Framework For An Empowering And Dignified Life. He's served more than years in public education in the capacity of teacher/coach, assistant principal and Social Emotional Learning. Jason has impacted students globally, including in Taiwan, China, and Benin, Africa. He works to reduce human division and promote personal well-being through EmpowerED Pathways, Free Black Thought, and The Institute for Liberal Values.

Books mentioned in this episode:

• "The Psychology of Emotions" by Carroll Izard

Previous episodes mentioned:

• Jake Wiskerchen: episodes 2 & 97
• Zander Keig: 38
• Jason Littlefield: 46
• Sara Stockton: 93

TALK TO ME: book a discovery call.

LOCALS: Ask questions of me & guests; get early access to new episodes + exclusive content. Join my community.

SUPPORT THE SHOW: subscribe, like, comment, & share or donate.

DO NO HARM: join our community of concerned professionals.

EIGHTSLEEP: Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST.

ORGANIFI: Take 20% off Organifi with code SOMETHERAPIST.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration. 

SHOW NOTES & transcript with help from SwellAI.

MUSIC: Thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude & permission. 

To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!

Learn more about Do No Harm.

Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.

Take 20% off all superfood beverages with code SOMETHERAPIST at Organifi.

Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.

Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.

Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration.

Have a question for me? Looking to go deeper and discuss these ideas with other listeners? Join my Locals community! Members get to ask questions I will respond to in exclusive, members-only livestreams, post questions for upcoming guests to answer, plus other perks TBD.

Sidewalk Steve earned this nickname from boldly positioning himself on the streets of New Hampshire to discuss what’s wrong with pediatric sex trait modification with hundreds of passers-by. How has an introvert like Steve worked up the courage to speak in public about the most controversial issue of our time, despite fear of cancel culture and even assault? What communication techniques does he use to reach people? And what has he observed changing in the public consensus over the past several years?

Join us as we explore the communication techniques and talking points essential for challenging gender clinics, puberty blockers, and pediatric sex trait modifications. How do we navigate the delicate balance of engaging with those who vehemently oppose our views? And what about the suicide narrative that often clouds discussions on this topic? Can we break through the barriers of cognitive dissonance to truly connect with individuals who may have been hurt by gender ideology, while they project that hurt onto those of us trying to help?

Discover the power of listening, not lecturing, as we uncover the emotional and psychological complexities that drive individuals to cling onto identities that may not serve their best interests. How do we address the need for belonging and reassurance in a world where online forums can easily groom vulnerable youth into irreversible decisions? Tune in to gain insights into the nuanced challenges of advocating against harmful gender practices and the importance of creating safe spaces for individuals to question and explore their true identities.

Stephen Scaer is a special education teacher and an activist fighting sex-trait modifications for children. SidewalkSteve.org

X: @sidewalk_steve

Books mentioned in this episode:

• Irreversible Damage by Abigail Shrier
• When Prophecy Fails by Leon Festinger

Also mentioned:

• My testimony against a proposed Oregon bill banning misleadingly named “conversion therapy”
• My testimony in favor of Alaska House Bill 338

 00:00 Start

[00:00:37] Activist fighting sex trade modifications.

[00:05:29] Overwhelmingly positive responses to activism.

[00:08:15] Autism and transgender activism.

[00:11:33] Children and puberty blockers.

[00:16:57] Cognitive dissonance and reactions.

[00:19:08] Cognitive dissonance and defense mechanisms.

[00:22:33] Millennial movements throughout history.

[00:27:36] Listening and understanding diverse perspectives.

[00:30:39] The balance of information overload.

[00:34:43] Regret rates in medical procedures.

[00:39:39] Detransition and autism in identity.

[00:42:51] Gender identity exploration journey.

[00:49:25] The suicide narrative.

[00:52:08] Gender Affirming Care.

[00:54:56] Suicide rates among trans youth.

[01:00:29] Suicide rates among genders.

[01:06:26] Teaching kids about suicide.

[01:08:08] Manipulation and mental health.

[01:11:59] Gender identity and autism.

[01:16:27] Speaking up in public forums.

[01:20:09] Personal stories in advocacy.

[01:23:03] Speaking up for a cause.

TALK TO ME: book a discovery call.

LOCALS: Ask questions of me & guests; get early access to new episodes + exclusive content. Join my community.

SUPPORT THE SHOW: subscribe, like, comment, & share or donate.

DO NO HARM: join our community of concerned professionals.

EIGHTSLEEP: Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST.

ORGANIFI: Take 20% off Organifi with code SOMETHERAPIST.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration. 

SHOW NOTES & transcript with help from SwellAI.

MUSIC: Thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude & permission. 

To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!

Learn more about Do No Harm.

Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.

Take 20% off all superfood beverages with code SOMETHERAPIST at Organifi.

Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.

Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.

Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration.

Have a question for me? Looking to go deeper and discuss these ideas with other listeners? Join my Locals community! Members get to ask questions I will respond to in exclusive, members-only livestreams, post questions for upcoming guests to answer, plus other perks TBD.

I’ve brought together a panel of two detransitioners and an elder therapist with many years of experience treating transition regret in psychoanalytic psychotherapy. Together, we explore the barriers to effective psychotherapy for individuals experiencing transition regret and the importance of a relational approach in therapy. But what happens when therapists fall into the trap of ego issues and countertransference? How do detransitioners navigate the shame and blame that often accompany their experiences? And what role does the mind-body connection play in healing trauma and emotional wounds? Join us as we uncover the challenges detransitioners face and the need for a holistic approach to mental health care.

Nicolas Blooms describes himself as a Detransitioner and Gender Shaman full of fruity passion to create ways for people to spark the deeper magical wisdom within their hearts to root in their inner resilience. Witness his liberating journey to self-love and remembering his Soul by soaking in his graphic novel, Trans to Detrans: A Soul Solution. He believes it’s totally possible to heal gender dysphoria and any other mental dis-ease! He previously appeared on episode 98. Trans to Detrans: A Graphic Novel Journey from Self-Hate to Self-Compassion, with Nicolas Blooms.

Layton is a detransitioned woman, conversion therapy survivor, artist, and psychic somatic practitioner. She previously appeared on episodes 95. Transing the Gay Away? Cults, Actual Conversion Therapy, & Dissociation: part 1 with Layton, and 96. From Cult to Gender Clinic: Misdiagnosis, Detransition & Healing — Layton, part 2. Follow her on X @origina1ange1 or visit her website at psychicsomatic.com. 

Bob Withers is a Jungian analyst with over 35 years’ experience as a psychotherapist. During that time he has worked with several transgender people in various stages of transition and detransition. He has written a series of articles about that work including the 2020 article ‘Transgender Medicalization’. Bob is a former senior lecturer on the University of Westminster’s master’s program, where he specialized in the history and philosophy of the mind/body relationship in medicine. He is also co-founder of The Rock Clinic, a charitable, community based psychotherapy and counseling service in Brighton England, where he lives. He previously appeared on episode 47. The Scapegoated Body: Transition Regret in Psychotherapy with Bob Withers. 

All books mentioned on this podcast can be found at sometherapist.com/bookshop or by following the Amazon affiliate links below.

Trans to Detrans: A Soul Solution, by Nicolas Blooms

00:00 Start

[00:00:49] Detransitioners in therapy.

[00:03:54] Complex psychiatric needs in counseling.

[00:07:21] Overcoming mind-body dissociation.

[00:13:30] Suicide narrative discussion.

[00:16:33] The effect of estrogen on suicide.

[00:18:20] Transitioning without therapist guidance.

[00:24:26] Mentorship in therapy relationships.

[00:28:09] Boundaries in therapy.

[00:31:40] Therapist-client relationship dynamics.

[00:35:14] Individualized approach in therapy.

[00:40:22] Challenges in mental health care.

[00:43:14] Bodily care and mental health.

[00:46:10] Trauma stored in the body.

[00:49:39] Somatic experiencing and healing.

[00:55:23] Taking healing into own hands.

[00:59:04] Detransitioning and medical issues.

[01:02:24] The needs of detransitioners.

[01:03:38] Gender dysphoria treatment controversies.

[01:09:35] Gender identity and detransitioning.

[01:13:38] Challenges in therapy dynamics.

[01:14:48] Reintegrating anger after dissociation.

[01:20:45] Hope and healing after trauma.

[01:23:04] Join my community at somekindoftherapist.locals.com.

TALK TO ME: book a discovery call.

LOCALS: Ask questions of me & guests; get early access to new episodes + exclusive content. Join my community.

SUPPORT THE SHOW: subscribe, like, comment, & share or donate.

DO NO HARM: join our community of concerned professionals.

EIGHTSLEEP: Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST.

ORGANIFI: Take 20% off Organifi with code SOMETHERAPIST.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration. 

SHOW NOTES & transcript with help from SwellAI.

MUSIC: Thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude & permission. 

To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!

Learn more about Do No Harm.

Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.

Take 20% off all superfood beverages with code SOMETHERAPIST at Organifi.

Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.

Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.

Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at

Today’s episode is unlike any other. Although I had an entirely different episode planned, something came up recently that needed to be addressed. I said something on social media that hit a nerve for a lot of anguished people, namely, ROGD parents — ironically, the population I am most focused on addressing, and typically have great relationships with in the markedly different context of personal consulting. But this wasn’t consulting; it was the social media platform X, where misunderstandings and pile-ons abound while tone and context are in short supply. In turn, the reaction of people who felt hurt left me feeling quite hurt as well. 

I spent two days intensively processing what happened and discussing it with trusted advisers. This episode is the result of that processing, and it is probably the most vulnerable thing I will ever express to the public. I ask that anyone impacted by the recent drama take the time to listen. I hope it will also be of value to others interested in how to help families impacted by the gender crisis.

If you were one of the people who felt hurt by what I said on the internet, or perhaps questioned how you should feel about it, please consider what I have to say with an open heart and mind by listening to this message in full. It may resonate in unexpected ways. In an effort to address the ocean of pain inflicted by gender ideology and the ripple effects of brushing up against them, I illuminated aspects of the nature of the beast we are up against, and addressed several interconnected matters many of us have been feeling for a while but perhaps not put words to. Along the way, I addressed matters of grief and anguish; shame and blame; victim/rescuer/perpetrator dynamics; good and evil; idealization and devaluation; and what happens when society is overtaken by a dark force that raises the stakes of our smallest foibles into life-and-death matters. Finally, I suggest a way forward that restores innocence through grace and redemption.

Although I am not normally in the habit of posting videos of myself crying on the internet, on this occasion, it felt important to share my innermost experience with you as I face the heart of the beast that is hurting us all. I invite you to grieve with me. For a fuller experience including body language, you may wish to view this episode as a video on YouTube.

If you don’t want to spend an hour of your time this way, I only ask that you be willing to withhold judgment and refrain from making comments to disparage my reputation, since you are making the choice not to take into consideration what I have to say. That’s a fair request, and I would certainly do the same for you.

Likewise, if you have made critical remarks of me to others, or on social media, but you do take the time to hear me out, and you do end up feeling differently after this, I would appreciate you following up and sharing with those people how this episode impacted your perspective. Again, I would do the same for you. 

In case you’re wondering: the hurt and drama surrounding these events caused me to delete the tweets in question, temporarily lock my account, and stop looking at it for a few days. While I thought I screenshotted everything, all I am left with when I look is screenshots of hurtful comments left by others, so I actually find myself without a record of what I originally said. Some people may have taken my choices to delete the tweets, lock my account, and/or ignore social media for a few days to mean something in particular, but my choices meant only that I needed a break from all of it to collect myself. What I have to say is contained in this episode when listened to as a whole.

No timestamps, no ads, no “where to find me,” no outro today. 

To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!

Learn more about Do No Harm.

Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.

Take 20% off all superfood beverages with code SOMETHERAPIST at Organifi.

Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.

Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.

Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration.

Have a question for me? Looking to go deeper and discuss these ideas with other listeners? Join my Locals community! Members get to ask questions I will respond to in exclusive, members-only livestreams, post questions for upcoming guests to answer, plus other perks TBD.

In a rare solo episode, I reflect on a few key themes that have emerged during the course of my work consulting with with parents who are worried about losing their kids to the gender craze. Join me as I share insights on how to help families facing this challenge. When is it actually a bad idea to tell your kids about the harms of sex trait modification? How can parents express concerns to headstrong adolescents without pushing them away? What strategies can you employ to understand their perspectives while maintaining your own boundaries? Tune in to discover the power of strategic apologizing and the importance of listening without necessarily agreeing.

We'll also explore the impact of porn and social media on youth's perceptions of gender and sexuality. How does exposure to certain media influence their beliefs and behaviors? And what part do male and female role models play in shaping their identities? Plus, we'll touch on the dynamics of splitting and triangulation within families facing the gender crisis. How can parents navigate these complex relationships to support children effectively? And what common pitfalls must be avoided in order to prevent the rift from deepening?

Books mentioned in this episode:

• Never Split the Difference by Chris Voss
• Lost in Trans Nation by Miriam Grossman

Books mentioned on this podcast can also be found in my bookshop. My recommended reading list for ROGD parents is the second section down on that page. If I can help, book a discovery call.

 00:00 Start

[00:02:25] Gender craze in family dynamics.

[00:05:27] Origins of gender dysphoria.

[00:10:04] Importance of being strategic.

[00:11:31] A tightrope marathon.

[00:15:47] Avoid sharing too much information.

[00:20:48] Navigating teenage pride and knowledge.

[00:24:11] Hormonal effects on reproductive system.

[00:27:14] Hostage negotiation techniques.

[00:33:40] Apologizing for giving access to technology.

[00:36:21] Internalizing female oppression.

[00:39:44] Boys and porn addiction.

[00:43:35] ROGD parent role models.

[00:47:21] Cry for help in parenting.

TALK TO ME: book a discovery call.

LOCALS: Ask questions of me & guests; get early access to new episodes + exclusive content. Join my community.

SUPPORT THE SHOW: subscribe, like, comment, & share or donate.

DO NO HARM: join our community of concerned professionals.

EIGHTSLEEP: Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST.

ORGANIFI: Take 20% off Organifi with code SOMETHERAPIST.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration. 

SHOW NOTES & transcript with help from SwellAI.

MUSIC: Thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude & permission. 

To support this show, please leave a rating & review on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Subscribe, like, comment & share via my YouTube channel. Or recommend this to a friend!

Learn more about Do No Harm.

Take $200 off your EightSleep Pod Pro Cover with code SOMETHERAPIST at EightSleep.com.

Take 20% off all superfood beverages with code SOMETHERAPIST at Organifi.

Check out my shop for book recommendations + wellness products.

Show notes & transcript provided with the help of SwellAI.

Special thanks to Joey Pecoraro for our theme song, “Half Awake,” used with gratitude and permission.

Watch NO WAY BACK: The Reality of Gender-Affirming Care (our medical ethics documentary, formerly known as Affirmation Generation). Stream the film or purchase a DVD. Use code SOMETHERAPIST to take 20% off your order. Follow us on X @2022affirmation or Instagram at @affirmationgeneration.

Have a question for me? Looking to go deeper and discuss these ideas with other listeners? Join my Locals community! Members get to ask questions I will respond to in exclusive, members-only livestreams, post questions for upcoming guests to answer, plus other perks TBD.