Your Space

Luna is an internationally bestselling author, podcast host, certified life coach and NLP practitioner, speaker and influencer. With over 10k followers across social media platforms and a decade of life changing work with women, Luna inspires others to see their greatness; to embrace all of who they are and begin to truly love themselves, inside and out.

After decades of self-hate, body dissatisfaction that led to bulimia and extreme self-worth issues, Luna embarked on a mission to change it.

For the bigger part of her life, she was stuck in the socially accepted view-point of hating herself and her body with no clear alternative at hand. On the outside she was happy, confident and in control. On the inside she wished desperately to be someone else and to have a different body.

Luna appeared confident, but ashamed of her body and a result felt inadequate. Covered with bravado that was OK. 

First diet began at 16 years of age. Did not know what to do, so she did what the magazines told her to do. Just excercised more and ate less. Lost weight.

Dieted up and down for next 10 years.Got aknowledgment for it every time lost weight and everytime gained it back, felt worthless. Eventually led to Bulimia. 

Overall a feeling that had been lied to, that if just got the ‘right’ body I would be happy. But every time got "there", there was always something wrong with my body.

Began to think I have been told a lie and that happiness not in this way.

The level of self hatred that people have is just astounding. Its just plain abusive.

The honeycomb mistress that lead to Bulimic and self punishment behaviours.

Dieting traps and pitfalls.

Cycle of dieting from complete control to completely out of control all fuelled that I am inherently unworthy. What happens to your self esteem when you see your body as the perpetual ‘before’ picture. When is the narrative going to change?

When will we begin to know that we are worthy.

Today the global exposure is profound. If you have a belief that you are not worthy, you can find infinite references that will prove just that to you. 

How do we create the example for others now. How do we enhance the image that real bodies are ok and that they are able to be loved exactly as they are.

What is the difference between closing a ‘diet’ that is self punishments VS closing a way of eating that is empowering to your wellbeing? NOT what we do, but WHY we do it?

What is the narrative, are we locked in hate body, and fear food cycle.

What happens when we stop seeing our movement as punishment.

Defining why we exercise, and asking what you want to do with your body? Finding the why of your life. How can we define wellness and the importance of the environment you put yourself in. Find even just 1 minute per day for yourself. Find the first window of time for you which sends a strong message that you are worthy. 

What is the ‘feminine’ culture the puts pressure on everyone. The definitions that impact and influence. How the world treats people based on the way they show up visually in the world.

Finding and defining what your image is. What is your personal version of feminine. Are you trying to fit yourself into a box that is really not you at all. 

What if we talked about the energy as yin/yang rather than Masculine and feminine. A much more fluid version that we get to define. What if we stopped putting expectation on appearance and learn from others about how we are unique. 

Are we striving for the unattainable body? Who is telling us what the ideal body shape is? 

What is even possible biologically? How can we begin to find beauty in ourselves?

Begin with nature and what we find beautiful? Is it the oddness and uniqueness that attracts us? What is interesting about us? What gives us...

Cindy Newstead is the founder and head stylist of Style with Cindy.

She is a pioneer in the personal styling industry. With 19 years of personal styling and facilitation of styling courses. She has clocked up 8000 personal styling consultations!

Cindy has been a head stylist for Loreal fashion week, she is a color consultant and an NLP master practitioner.

She is an author of a book called: You are more than just your bits.

When what you wear is not just about clothes.

Those change-room moments. How alone you can feel when you are in a change room and feel that sinking feeling. That you are not looking the way you want and beating yourself up about it.

What does a stylist hear in the changing room most often?

A person saying that they ‘hate’ a part of themselves or their body entirely. 

From this moment that is all that the woman sees about themselves and reality is that usually not even seen by anyone else.

Cindy notes that what is the inner conversation that the person is having with themselves, on repeat and automatic that is purely damaging to their self esteem and how they do life as a result.

What do others see in us (the stylist main role) that we cannot see in ourselves.

Finding others that will support you to see yourself and feel amazing in your clothes and in your skin.

Key Questions to look at:

• What does your wardrobe DO in your life? 
• What are you going to wear your clothes for? 
• What are the items in your current wardrobe you put on and take off, that is your intuition telling you it is not right. Get rid of it. Not right for you.

Hear what you say to yourself when you begin with the words I hate….. 

Where are you saying this to yourself.

Key to self confidence is taking the hate out of your language and find love for yourself.

How are we being our worst enemies?

How are you comparing to others?

What is the internal dialogue that is triggered.

Where are we allowing ourselves to this to ourselves. Radiating out from us and puts out a negative energy and makes others react to it.

How to change this?

• Got to come from within. Someone telling you to ‘not’ say that is not enough.
• Need to stop long enough to hear it and also begin to work on yourself to break the cycle.
• Finding the circuit breaker is key.

Assessing your clothing:

What attachments do we have to our clothes. Financial, or sentimental are most common.

Aiming to get wardrobe to where you LOVE everything in there. 

Get to know your wardrobe, play, experiment and have some fun with it.

Also ask yourself how you want to feel?? If you think its not right, trust yourself and get rid of it.

Styling not about fashion but about how a woman feels about herself.  Style comes from within because your personal style is about being congruent with what you are and who we portray ourselves to be. Working out what your own personal style is a journey worth taking. And it evolves over time. Sometimes people lose their way. Life just gets in the way. OK to be in this space. Forgive your self.

We have so much choice available and the only way to discern what to wear is to find the authentic version of self and then dress that. The common trap of working toward a size or a number and how soul destroying this can be.

Cindy finds so many women hold off living, until their bodies are a particular size. What will you miss out on if this is the case?

Fashion industry.

What is happening in the industry? Is shape and body diversity happening in fashion??

What happening, vs what is actual in the industry may not be congruent. There is a struggle over a certain size in the marketplace still to find interesting and...

Liz Anderson Peacock is an all around amazing human.

Chiropractor with a diplomate in paediatrics with multiple awards fro serves to the profession and contribution/Coach/Lecturer/International speaker/Philosopher/World traveller/Mother/Grandmother/Amputee.

2 Key issues to look at, worthiness and perfectionism issues around body image.

So many images in the world that are not supporting us to have self belief and love.

Women can have fundamental values and beliefs that tell us we are here to serve others before ourselves. Creates exhaustion and impossible to achieve goals. Leading to a health crisis or other type of crisis in their lives.

Does that need to be perfect, put an unrealistic expectation on you? 

How much do you restrict your life waiting to be Perfect?

AND if something is prefect you cannot improve it. Could striving for excellence or mastery which has growth in it be healthier for your mind and body?

Better question than is this perfect, could be, did I do my best in this situation?

Are we making ourself a priority? Do we say NO to others to say YES to ourselves. 

What feedback are we getting from the world and what attention we are paying to it.

The journey to becoming an amputee. Finding the surrender to be so much more than a body part to have a part of your body removed.

How an elephant showed the way and shined a light on a pathway toward having the amputation.

The amazing process of setting intention. Gave clarity and certainty.

Focus was on these things: Joy/Grace/Love/Wholeness/Vitality/Freedom/Faith 

When arriving at hospital for process song playing that used the exact words from her intention and also nurses whose names were: Grace  and Joy!!

This demonstrated that when you let go of expectations and trust that what shows up will be amazing on the other side.

At first the thought of, HOW am I going to do this, then surrender to this, and allow it to come to her.

Amazing process of life after amputation being really full and in fact fuller than before.

Staying conscious so vital.

Times that went ‘unconscious’ and the method of becoming conscious in the moment to see the reality.

Monitor distractions because they can be harmful to us. Let them go and allow things to just come back to you. Release the grip and sense you are in control.

Ask yourself: What is your body is capable of? Is it way more that we think it is.

Becoming an amputee has opened Liz's world to other people and their views. What are the assumptions we make and what is the story of the person?And what kind of love and compassion and care can we show to others and therefore how can we do this for ourselves.

Wholeness as a concept. Where are YOU amputating your life in a way that limits you that makes you feel that you are missing something. Where are we amputating our emotions? 

We are so much more than a body part.

We can work toward a better version of themselves if we wish. Can we be more self aware to love ourselves more and the habits that cause the body to not function as well as it can will just fall away. 

What are the energies or vibrations that dominate us and determine who we are in the world.

Consistent and repetition on a new behaviour that serves us. What have we hardwired that no longer serves us. What habits do you need to review and unhook to find a new way of beingWhat version of you do you take to any activity you do.

When finding a discomfort in our lives. Take the time to sit in silence with self to really hear the voices and remove the should and could. How do we sit in the discomfort and allow that energy to flow, so that we can find the peace we need to allow support to come into the awareness. 

Finding the gratitude for all of...

Shelly has been one of New Zealand top trainers in business and technical writing for nearly a decade. Her brand is all about joy and badassery and her work is so much more than writing an email or report in plain language. She supports people to find their authentic and most powerful voice. She is a Mum and a grandmother and has had a journey with her body.

Today she is fit and strong and in a healthy body but still has a shitty relationship with food.

The journey for Shelly was she was the youngest of 4 sisters and her Mum worried about weight and had sisters were all on diets.

This made her feel that she had to look a certain way to be loveable and be accepted in the world.

Remembers saving $5k for a cruise then decided to put money away for surgery instead.

Now 10 yrs ago.

Lost 60kg and all inhibitions.

Lots of learning around this process.

Loved self before surgery. Surgery is a tool, not an answer.

And Surgery does not make you like yourself.

What discovered was how much energy she used, to feel happy and confident with a heavy body.

Pretty constant journey and struggle. 

Choosing to change your physical body is one thing, but won’t make you love yourself or feel happy. How do we chose the healthy version of your body without punishment.

Love yourself to a place of power.

You cannot hate or punish yourself to a body that you love. 

How do we match the outside to the inside. Who are we truly and authentically. How do we show our identity?

What kind of connections could we create so that people could connect deeply for each other. What might our collective look like if we all sat down and shared from our heart.

Everyone needs a safe place to land. It is different for everyone but so important. 

Then we can be bold enough to be ourselves and do life the way we want. And then use peoples responses as just a filter.

Remove the people that are in your world that are harmful or hurtful. Surround yourself in goodness. Ask yourself how does this environment make me feel? Am I more of authentic self or less of myself her in this space?

How can we have the level of self love that we can say YES and NO conscientiously.

Trust that the journey you walk, especially the hard ones, support others on theirs. 

Parenting from this place of empowerment: Sharing the journey with your children. All the pain and process being worth it in the end. 

How do you celebrate yourself more and more every year and love ourselves even more.

Being in love with what you do with your own body. Whether fitness, surgery or any other action. Maybe if we all showed more compassion around this and less judgement of each other it would be easier for everyone.

Both internally and externally how do we speak to ourselves? Can we look in the mirror and love what we see, instead of hating on ourselves.

Using the word YET to reflect the journey we are on. 

Bring the dialogue out so we can hear it and learn from it raising awareness.

Connect with Shelly on www.shellydavies.com and join her programs at the school of unprofessional writing to learn more about how to communicate authentically and with impact. Use the code BETTINA to get USD$100 off any speialist pathway or subscription to the school.

Ash Jones is an integrative Chiropractor who is passionate about challenging the narrative around what it means to be a health professional. With an extensive history working in the fashion industry, Ash loves to show her inside on the outside. Ash strives to hold space for her clients that embody empowerment, authentically and vulnerability in all areas.

This amazing conversation addresses so many really important issues. From being encouraged to join a weight loss group at 16 to accepting of self as just the way we are. 

How are you being small in the world. Being quiet and not able to speak truth. 

We discuss the versions of ourselves and the deep deep conditioning that tells us what is ‘wrong’ with our bodies. When did your opinion form and what is your psychology you have developed around your own body image. 

Calling out bullshit around body image and what is ok and not ok. Busting myths about what we perceive as healthy weight and wellbeing. Going back to function and feeling rather than punishing self for being not the right size and shape.

How can we change the narrative around all of this. How do we stop the story we tell ourselves as us being wrong. Can we stop punishing ourselves to look in a particular way and empower ourselves to really take action from a positive place.

Can we come from a place of abundance and acceptance, give us energy and facing our lives with joy from inside. How can we heal, for ourselves and also for the future generations. How can we forgive our lineage of woman who taught us this thinking.?

Change starts with us.

Connect with Ash Jones on IG and FB: @thestylishchiro 

Alira Verity knows a bit about bodies and how people see themselves.

Her own amazing history:

Victorian strongest woman Under 65kg 4 times. 

Gold Coast strongest woman Under 73kg in 2021

3rd placed at Arnold Classic Strongwoman competition 

Personal Trainer

Cross-fit coach and competitor

Alira began the journey by feeling yucky about herself, which lead her to a bootcamp and a lifetime of being involved in fitness.

We explore what are the definitions of strength, what does this mean to you.?

What are the misconceptions that you hold about yourself and your ability? 

Perceptions of what we are ‘supposed’ to look like. What judgments we make of each other and ourselves based on this.

The trap of leaving self to last.

Fiercely competitive and yet super connected.

You need a support system to sustain you as a human.

Connection with people is so important to feel part of a tribe. 

Explore the deep fear that some people have of coming to the gym. How Alira strives to make that hour the best hour of their day.

What is her superpower (other than that amazing strength) That you don't have to get along and like everyone. Just leave them alone and move on. 

Not giving up of self to be connected with anyone or anything. Preserving of the self above all else. The importance of being you in all relationships.

What Alira brings to her clients? “I believe in someone wholeheartedly until they believe in themselves.” Find someone who believe in your capacity, even if you don't believe it yourself. 

How women support each other in the fitness industry sometimes has left her wanting. How would it feel to have a woman in your corner backing you 100%?

What happens for others when we begin to make change.

And how do we surround ourselves with a tribe that loves us. 

Alira was involved in an amazing documentary about one such tribe for her and that was the women involved in Strong women competitions. Check out https://iview.abc.net.au/show/strong-women for some awesome insights.

So many in our world feel isolated. This can be for so many different reasons and can happen even when we are surrounded by people. How does this happen and what does it create?

We build a wall, isolate ourselves in a safe cave and push others away.

But is it safe in that cave really….. 

Not for everyone.

Because we then become our own worst enemy. We become the threat as we pick up the stick we feared from others, and create a distorted sense of control. 

And after a while doing that we forget why we are worthy of NOT being tortured this way. 

In this episode we look at the Journey to boundaries.

From the moment of epiphany when you realise your boundaries have been challenged and you have made decisions that are not serving you. To how to really do the deep introspection to understand why you found yourself there in the first place.

And all this with the compassion for self because after all this is a journey.

This meditation will leave you feeling lighter and like you can breathe again. A short journey to find a place to cleanse just for you.

What are the experiences that make us Bump into ourselves? Often challenging and usually very uncomfortable but oh so important.

Those times where we hear the fullness of our own judgements of others.

This episode explores one of these opportunities I have had to really hear my mind and all the tricks it plays on me.

Explore the pathway we can take to find compassion for others and ourselves by embracing the journey.