Picture this: you're engaged in a heated argument with a loved one, words are flying around, and suddenly, you find yourself saying, "I feel attacked!" But is it really an attack? Does this word accurately convey what you're feeling? This episode will take you on a fascinating exploration of true feelings versus faux feelings. We discuss how often our words fail to truly represent our emotions and delve into why words like 'attacked' or 'betrayed' may not adequately express our feelings. We also go into how mastering the accurate expression of our feelings can aid in fostering deeper connections. We share with you the best strategies for defending your boundaries without resorting to aggression and how to stay attuned to your emotions and needs. Moreover, we illuminate the importance of conversations that promote mutual understanding and connection, emphasizing the significance of recognizing and respecting our feelings, needs, thoughts, and perceptions. Listen in as we offer practical insights to help you navigate your relationships with newfound clarity and depth.

Show notes:
[0:00] Intro
[1:24] What is the impact of accusatory language
[8:31] How do you communicate clearly without triggering defensiveness?
[13:30] How to flip the  mindset and meet boundaries
[15:15] Non-violent listening and fostering connection in conversations
[19:56] Exploring systems and dynamics of self-protection
[29:52]  What two key things distort our perceptions?
[32:30] How do you stay non-violent when listening?
[35:12] How to choose growth vs. acceptance in relationships
[38:23] The reason we often stay too long in miserable relationships
[40:15] Switching therapists for different perspectives
[41:36] How do you disengage from someone being aggressive?
[46:06] How to know if a feeling is real
[48:11] How do you achieve a connection with another person? 
[51:29] Outro

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For ongoing practice and deeper learning, I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection. 

Twice a month, I host live calls where members bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

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