Sex With Dr. Jess

12 Strategies To Deal With Rejection


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Whether at work or in a personal relationship, rejection can suck. Listen to the SexWithDrJess podcast (above) or read the brief summary and full transcript below. As always, thank you so much for being here and engaging with our content. We appreciate you.
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Rejection Happens — in the Boardroom and the Bedroom 
We poured through messages from across our community—sexual partners, executives, performers, and friendship groups all shared the ways rejection shows up. Why did this matter so much? Because we tend to feel it more acutely when it threatens a core identity or social capital. 
Practical Strategies to Manage Rejection
Broaden your connection toolbox
If your world runs on sex—or status—build emotional, intellectual, physical, creative, communal ways to feel seen.
Reframe rejection as protection
Sometimes “no” is a headnod from life steering you toward better matches or priorities.
Flip the initiation script
Both people take turns initiating—this sharing builds empathy and reframes what a “no” even means.
Prioritize quality
Better communication and attentiveness in sex and life mean fewer personalizations of “no.”
Let yourself feel
You’re human—sit with the emotions, don’t rush, don’t blame. According to the APA, developing psychological strategies to cope with rejection can help you build emotional resilience and reduce the long-term impact of repeated “nos.”
Rewrite your inner narrative
Spot those “I’m unworthy” loops and replace them with evidence-based truths.
Lean on your circle
Friends, partners, therapists—hold space and shatter the isolation of shame.
Practice rejection
Like auditions or casual dating—it builds resilience if your crew is cheering you on.
Ask what you want
Name the emotional needs—time, recognition, validation—and invite your partner to help meet them—not out of obligation, but nuance.
Shift from “no” to “not now”
Softer refusals paired with alternatives keep connection alive.
Take a beat
That primal panic? Pause. Regulate. Breathe. And reapproach clear-headed.
Derive growth from “no”
Every rejection teaches something—skill, timing, values, boundaries.
 
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More to Read: Internal Link Suggestions
For tools to open these key conversations, check our post on erotic connection – Quick connection exercise for couples.
If you’d like to explore balancing intimacy and exploration, see erotic seduction – The core erotic feeling.
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Sex With Dr. JessBy Dr. Jess O'Reilly

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