That Hoarder: Overcome Compulsive Hoarding

#206 Finding connection and community when hoarding feels isolating

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  • Podcast show notes, links and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ 

    • Hoarding disorder can feel deeply isolating, and finding genuine connection isn’t always straightforward.

    In this episode, I talk about building community - both through hoarding-specific peer groups, online spaces, as well as simply nurturing friendships outside the home.

    I share practical ways to reconnect, set boundaries, and remind yourself that you deserve care and companionship, whatever your home looks like.

    • The Relationship Between Hoarding and Isolation
    • How hoarding and isolation often accompany each other
    • Feelings of shame and concern about being misunderstood
    • Secrecy around hoarding, even from friends
    • Impact of loneliness on motivation and self-worth
    • The fundamental human need for connection
    • Finding Community: Hoarding-Specific Support
    • Benefits of speaking with others who “get” hoarding
    • Relief and authenticity in hoarding-focused communities
    • Misunderstandings and stigma around hoarding in general society
    • Shared language and understanding in dedicated groups
    • Types of Hoarding Communities
    • Peer support groups (both for people who hoard and for their loved ones)
    • Differences between in-person and online groups
    • Dehoarding accountability Zoom groups run by the host
    • Therapy groups led by professionals
    • Online forums, social media groups, and subreddits
    • Choosing a Support Group and Overcoming Barriers
    • The process of finding the right group for your needs
    • Not all groups will fit; trial and error is normal
    • Common barriers: fear of judgment, privacy concerns, and feeling overwhelmed
    • Exploring online versus in-person options based on comfort and access
    • Managing triggers and emotional challenges when joining a group
    • Broadening Community Beyond Hoarding
    • Importance of connection outside of the hoarding context
    • How hoarding can lead to progressive social isolation
    • Ways to set boundaries while still building relationships
    • Alternative Sources of Community & Connection
    • Joining hobby or interest-based groups (gardening, book clubs, crafts, etc.)
    • Attending classes and workshops (in-person or online)
    • Volunteering for shared causes and the benefits it offers
    • Engaging in outdoor activity groups for physical and mental health
    • Involvement in faith communities (acknowledging varied experiences)
    • Nurturing and Rekindling Friendships
    • The value of maintaining and nurturing friendships
    • Strategies for reconnecting with old friends (acknowledging awkwardness)
    • Personal anecdotes demonstrating successful reconnection
    • Maintaining and Deepening Existing Friendships
    • Creative ways of keeping in touch (memes, postcards, regular outings)
    • Showing care and interest without inviting people into your home
    • Importance of honesty about personal limitations
    • Navigating difficult moments with friends through gentle outreach
    • Building New Friendships
    • The importance of patience and consistent small efforts
    • Transitioning from casual acquaintance to meaningful connection
    • Reciprocity and mutual engagement as key to growing relationships
    • Natural pace of friendship development
    • The Value of Self-Compassion
    • Being a good friend to yourself while seeking social connections
    • Avoiding self-blame and catastrophic thinking
    • Recognising your own worth despite challenges related to hoarding
    • Taking Small Steps Toward Connection
    • Encouragement to take actionable, manageable steps to build community
    • Celebrating small efforts toward greater connection
    • Realistic expectations about gradual progress
    • Suggestions for relevant previous podcast episodes on loneliness, accountability, and community

      • Links

      • Podcast ep 200: Things I wish I’d known: a letter to Episode One Me
      • Podcast ep 130: Loneliness and hoarding with Vassia Sarantopoulou: build human connections and combat hoarding-related shame
      • Podcast ep 138: The Accountability Effect: Accountability, encouragement and mutual support when tackling hoarding and dehoarding
      • Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom session: Accountability Booking Form
      • Website: Overcome Compulsive Hoarding
      • Become a Dehoarding Darling
      • Submit a topic for the podcast to cover
      • Questions to ask when dehoarding: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/podquestions
      • Instagram: @thathoarderpodcast
      • Twitter: @ThatHoarder
      • Mastodon: @[email protected]
      • TikTok: @thathoarderpodcast
      • Facebook: Overcome Compulsive Hoarding with That Hoarder
      • Pinterest: That Hoarder
      • YouTube: Overcome Compulsive Hoarding with That Hoarder
      • Reddit: Overcome Compulsive Hoarding with That Hoarder subreddit
      • Help out: Support this project
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