Free Time with Jenny Blake

214: “Don’t Suffer Twice” (Pivot Crossover)


Listen Later

Today’s solo riff is on a three-word phrase that has helped quell countless waves of anxiety in the decade since I first heard it, wisdom passed from my friend Monica McCarthy's (aka MonBon’s) mom then to the pages of Pivot. Pardon the occasional panting (lol) and background noise—err New York City soundscape—as I recorded this one on a big hill at the park, running up and down while throwing a giant log for Ryder to chase. He chases sticks, I chase ideas!

This crossover episode originally aired on the Pivot podcast on April 2, 2023.

🌟 3 Key Takeaways:

  • Memento Mori, though it is by definition morbid, is a practice of reminding ourselves that we (and our loved ones) will die. As the monks at Wat Umong temple hand-wrote on a note posted to a tree, “Remember: In 100 years, all new people.” How can you allow this reality to inform how you engage in relationships without leading to excessive anxiety or worry?
  • The Second Arrow: Notice when you are suffering because of a story you are telling yourself after a painful event, grinding the gears of a problem and making it worse long after the fact.
  • Remember, “Worry is praying for what you don’t want.” Try not to worry for or about others either; it’s not a nice energy to project or to feel.


    ✅ Next Action: If you notice yourself worrying or anxious, try to remind yourself of those three little words from MonBon's mom: Don't suffer twice.


    📚Books Mentioned
    • Life After College
    • Pivot: The Only Move That Matters Is Your Next One
    • Free Time: Lose The Busywork, Love Your Business
    • The Examined Life: How We Lose and Find Ourselves by Stephen Grosz
    • When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times by Pema Chodron
    • Outrageous Openness: Letting the Divine Take the Lead by Tosha Silver
    • Change Me Prayers: The Hidden Power of Spiritual Surrender by Tosha Silver

    • 🔗 Resources
      • Articles: Many Animals—Including Your Dog—May Have Horrible Short-Term Memories, Memento Mori, The Second Arrow
      • People: Monica McCarthy, Tosha Silver, Penney Peirce

        🎧 Related Podcast Episodes
        • Pivot:
        • 312: Are You Future-Tripping?
        • Jenny & Penney Show (Spotify playlist)
        • Slow Cooked vs. Pressure Cooker
        • Free Time:
        • 170: 🌈 “Imagine a World of Abundance” ✨
        • 172: Free Time Isn’t Just for the Fun Days
        • 138: ⛵️ Stop Sailing the Sea of Shiny Shoulds
        • Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

          ...more
          View all episodesView all episodes
          Download on the App Store

          Free Time with Jenny BlakeBy Jenny Blake

          • 4.9
          • 4.9
          • 4.9
          • 4.9
          • 4.9

          4.9

          49 ratings


          More shows like Free Time with Jenny Blake

          View all
          Hidden Brain by Hidden Brain, Shankar Vedantam

          Hidden Brain

          43,589 Listeners

          The One You Feed by Eric Zimmer

          The One You Feed

          2,561 Listeners

          The Anxiety Coaches Podcast by Gina Ryan

          The Anxiety Coaches Podcast

          1,807 Listeners

          Pivot with Jenny Blake by Jenny Blake

          Pivot with Jenny Blake

          190 Listeners

          10% Happier with Dan Harris by 10% Happier

          10% Happier with Dan Harris

          12,787 Listeners

          The Marie Forleo Podcast by Marie Forleo

          The Marie Forleo Podcast

          1,654 Listeners

          UnF*ck Your Brain: Feminist Self-Help for Everyone by Kara Loewentheil

          UnF*ck Your Brain: Feminist Self-Help for Everyone

          5,143 Listeners

          Feel Better, Live More with Dr Rangan Chatterjee by Dr Rangan Chatterjee: GP & Author

          Feel Better, Live More with Dr Rangan Chatterjee

          3,985 Listeners

          The Cure for Chronic Pain with Nicole Sachs, LCSW by Nicole Sachs, LCSW

          The Cure for Chronic Pain with Nicole Sachs, LCSW

          2,517 Listeners

          Huberman Lab by Scicomm Media

          Huberman Lab

          29,411 Listeners

          ZOE Science & Nutrition by ZOE

          ZOE Science & Nutrition

          2,199 Listeners

          The Mel Robbins Podcast by Mel Robbins

          The Mel Robbins Podcast

          21,412 Listeners