Most men try to plan their way to great sex and end up killing the spark. We take a different route: build trust with clear statements, create a protected space for intimacy, and then let go of the plan so real desire can surprise you both.

We start by resetting the premise. Sex after divorce isn’t a sprint; it’s a craft. Jude Sandvall and Dallas Bluth unpack why safety and mutual benefit are the foundation—especially when kids, schedules, and past relationships are in the picture. You’ll hear how to turn “the talk” into foreplay by sharing who you are, not asking for permission: get tested before it’s relevant, say you’re a one-woman-at-a-time man if that’s your truth, and frame exclusivity and protection as identity, not negotiation. Women feel the difference instantly because it signals maturity, care, and a real invitation to relax.

Then we tackle logistics without losing the magic. Think “container,” not checklist: set a private, interruption-free window where intimacy could happen, but don’t script what must happen. Dallas explains how spontaneity—naming your desire in the moment, changing plans when the energy shifts—reduces pressure and increases arousal. If the wave doesn’t rise, you stay gracious and unattached to outcomes, which often creates the next spark faster. When the clothes finally come off, two rules lead to better experiences consistently: slow down and prioritize her pleasure.

Whether you’re rebuilding confidence after a low-sex marriage or navigating co-parenting calendars, this conversation is your playbook for sex that’s adult, ethical, and electric. We cover when not to talk (no texting, not mid-makeout), how to read timing if cues are hard, and how to be both structured and spontaneous. If you’re ready to date like a grown man—and enjoy better intimacy along the way—press play, subscribe, and share with a friend who needs this. Got a question for our live Q&A? Leave a review with your topic or reach out and tell us what you want next.