Men Rising From Divorce - A Rising Phoenix Podcast

Send us Fan Mail

Welcome to the start of a brand new masterclass series on the Rising Phoenix Podcast. After 225+ episodes, we have pulled the most critical, life-saving tools from the archives and organized them into a step-by-step survival guide.

We are starting at ground zero. Stage 1: The Ember phase.

If you are in the first days or weeks of your divorce, you are likely not sleeping, not eating, and feeling like you are losing your mind. You aren't going crazy. Your body is in a state of profound biological shock. This episode is not about fixing your life today; it is about pure triage and physical survival.

In this episode, we cover:

• The Reality of Somatic Shock: Why your chest is tight, why you are sweating, and why your thoughts are violently looping.
• The Hijacked Brain: Why your logical brain goes offline in the fight-or-flight response, and why making legal or financial decisions right now is incredibly dangerous.
• The Tactical 4-7-8 Reset: A physical breathing framework to force your nervous system to calm down.
• The 90-Second Rule: How to feel the physical hurt without letting your brain drown in the "story" of the pain.
• Validating Your Truth: Why trying to "man up" and put a lid on the trauma will only prolong your suffering.

Free Resource: The Stage 1 Ember Action Guide You don't need to take notes. We have built a free, 2-page survival checklist and workbook specifically for this episode. There is no email required and no sign-up—just click the link below, download the PDF, and get these tools in front of you today.

👉 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1uoHkXB7IdL-hDiIQMEEi1KdBkq9v6Yh4/view?usp=sharing

If you are walking through the fire, you do not have to do it alone. Join the Rising Phoenix Odyssey Discord: https://ko-fi.com/risingphoenixpodcast

Support the show

https://www.risingphoenixpodcast.com

Send us Fan Mail

In this episode I briefly talk about my now ended relationship and provide a little more detail about the episodes to come.

Please note I mistakenly call this one, episode 226....maybe one day I will go it and fix it....opps

Support the show

https://www.risingphoenixpodcast.com

Send us Fan Mail

In this episode I talk about where the podcast is heading and what to expect from me and it, going forward.

Support the show

https://www.risingphoenixpodcast.com

Send us Fan Mail

In this episode I cover a bit about what I did over the Summer and I talk about a major life change.

Support the show

https://www.risingphoenixpodcast.com

Send us Fan Mail

In this raw, unscripted solo episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on the state of the podcast and sharing the latest listener stats, community updates, and what the future holds for the show. But more importantly, we are diving deep into the single most critical survival skill a man needs when his marriage ends: the ability to soothe himself out of fight-or-flight mode.

When a crisis hits, your panic response takes over, and your logical thinking brain goes completely offline. I’ve watched too many good men willingly "bend over" and give up the entire farm legally just because they didn't know how to calm their own nervous system down before making permanent decisions.

Today, we are talking about the hard science of self-soothing—using simple, non-negotiable tools like targeted breathwork and releasing physical tension to get your brain back online so you can stop making reactive, destructive choices.

If you are currently sitting in the wreckage, feeling completely overwhelmed and lost, this one is your priority baseline. Your life is not over; your marriage is. It's time to learn how to manage the emotional firestorm so you can step back into leadership, get a plan, and realize you are going to be okay.

In this episode, we cover:

• The Phoenix State of Union: A transparent look at our latest download stats, why I'm looking for summer guest hosts, and thoughts on the future layout of the show.
• Giving Up the Farm: How operating out of panic causes men to make massive financial, relationship, and legal mistakes.
• The Biology of Calm: Why changing your physiology through strategic breathwork is your absolute best defense against the 2:00 AM panic loop.
• The Lone Wolf Trap: Recognizing when the weight is on your shoulders, why isolation can make the ghosts louder, and when to reach out for tactical support.

Support the show

https://www.risingphoenixpodcast.com

Send us Fan Mail

You wake up in a cold sweat. You just had a hyper-realistic dream that you and your ex-wife were back together, or worse, having a massive fight. Now, your entire morning is ruined by confusion, anger, or guilt. Does this mean you still want her back? Does it mean you are failing at your recovery?

According to psychotherapist Nick Balaisis, the answer is a resounding no.

Today, we dive into the fascinating world of Jungian dream analysis. We debunk the myth that dreams are just random neurological "trash," and explore how your subconscious uses dreams to send you vital messages about your own healing. Nick breaks down why the "Ex" in your dream is rarely actually about her—instead, she often symbolizes a part of yourself that you are neglecting, such as your own capacity for self-care.

If you want to stop letting your nightmares ruin your mornings and start using them as a roadmap for your recovery, this episode will completely change how you view your time asleep.

In this episode, we cover:

• The "Trash" Theory: Why we shouldn't dismiss our dreams as just random neurological noise.
• The "Ex" Dream: Why dreaming of your former partner usually means you are looking for a specific trait within yourself (and why you shouldn't take it literally).
• "Man-Keeping": How men outsource their emotional self-care to their wives, and how to start cultivating an "inner mother" to take care of yourself.
• Decoding Nightmares: Are you running because you're being chased, or being chased because you're running? Finding the "seeds of rebirth" hidden inside scary dreams.
• The Unconscious Nudge: How your brain uses the dream world to force you to look at the pain you are avoiding during the day.

Guest Bio: Nick Balaisis is a psychotherapist in private practice in Ontario, Canada, and an instructor at the University of Waterloo. With training in Jungian psychology from Zurich, Switzerland, he helps individuals use dream analysis to access their unconscious, process complex life transitions, and live more authentically.

Resources:

• Read Nick's Work: Find his regular articles on Psychology Today.

Support the show

https://www.risingphoenixpodcast.com

Send us Fan Mail

In this episode I cover where I am at, in life, lately, and how its ok to be...ok.

Support the show

https://www.risingphoenixpodcast.com

Send us Fan Mail

You are treating your divorce like a project at work. You are trying to analyze it, strategize your way out of it, and "logic" away the pain. But no matter how many books you read or podcasts you listen to, you still feel stuck.

Why? Because you are trying to treat a broken heart like a math problem.

Today, we are doing the heavy psychological lifting with Dr. Chet Sunde. We break down the critical difference between treating anxiety and processing true emotion. Most men are conditioned to be problem-solvers, which means when grief hits, we immediately retreat into our heads to figure it out. Dr. Sunde explains why this "logic trap" actually prolongs your suffering and keeps you disconnected from the very feelings you need to process to move forward.

If you are exhausted from overthinking your divorce and want to finally understand how to get out of your head and into your recovery, this is the episode you need.

In this episode, we cover:

• Anxiety vs. Emotion: The physiological difference between spinning in your thoughts and actually processing grief.
• The Logic Trap: Why your elite problem-solving skills are actually working against your emotional recovery.
• Getting Out of Your Head: Practical ways to safely connect with what you are feeling in your body without getting overwhelmed.
• The Internal Family Systems (IFS) Lens: How different "parts" of us try to protect us from the pain of the divorce by using over-analysis and anxiety.
• Fixing vs. Feeling: How to drop the urge to "fix" the situation so you can actually heal from it.

Guest Bio: Dr. Chet Sunde is a psychologist and provider who specializes in helping individuals navigate profound life transitions, emotional processing, and deep psychological recovery.

Support the show

https://www.risingphoenixpodcast.com

Send us Fan Mail

In this very short episode I invite you, to come guest host the show.

Support the show

https://www.risingphoenixpodcast.com

Send us Fan Mail

In this episode I cover the lessons that I have learned in the 6 plus years since my ex-wife left me.

Support the show

https://www.risingphoenixpodcast.com