Love Shack Live: Helping Couples Rescue Their Relationships

#229: Why Do Boundaries Make Me Feel Worse? How to Set Limits Without Losing Love


Listen Later

Send us a text

Ever set a boundary in your relationship, only to feel more misunderstood, guilty, or disconnected than before? You’re not alone. In fact, so many of us try to draw healthy lines, only to end up in new arguments, feeling shut out, or wondering if we’re doing something wrong.

Welcome to Love Shack Live, the podcast for anyone standing at a relationship crossroads, feeling the gap widen, and searching for a way back to genuine, lasting connection. If you’ve tried to “set boundaries” and it just made things messier, you’re in the right place.

This week, we’re asking:

  • Why do boundaries sometimes make us feel worse, not better?
  • What’s the difference between a boundary and a barrier?
  • And how do you set limits that protect your heart, without pushing your partner away?

Join relationship mentor Staci Bartley, along with Tom and Brooke, as they bust common myths about boundaries, share the real skills for setting limits that heal, and reveal what it takes to speak up for yourself and stay connected.

Curious to know why boundaries backfire, and what actually builds lasting trust? Listen in. This conversation might just change everything.

Timestamps: 

03:25 Physical Boundaries as a Metaphor

07:00 Emotional Boundaries and Compassionate Cruelty

16:49 The Misconception of Rigid Boundaries

26:26 The Story of Emma and Jake

27:53 Silent Resentment in Relationships

28:53 The Weight of Disregarding Yourself

29:50 The Illusion of Connection

33:24 Common Boundary Violations

36:37 Emotional Regulation and Boundaries

43:53 The Importance of Vulnerability

45:20 Practical Steps to Better Boundaries

47:55 Final Thoughts and Resources

🎯 Want to go deeper?

  • Take the $9 Self-Assessment here: https://stacibartley.com/separation-survival-kit/space-communication-playbook/
  • Start the 30-Day Roadmap and stop spiraling: https://stacibartley.com/self-paced/30-day-roadmap
  • Get community support inside the Better Love Club (available as an add-on with the roadmap)
...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

Love Shack Live: Helping Couples Rescue Their RelationshipsBy Staci Bartley, Relationship Expert

  • 4.9
  • 4.9
  • 4.9
  • 4.9
  • 4.9

4.9

49 ratings


More shows like Love Shack Live: Helping Couples Rescue Their Relationships

View all
The Save The Marriage Podcast by Lee H. Baucom, Ph.D.

The Save The Marriage Podcast

396 Listeners

Relationship Advice by Thrive Therapy - Colter Bloxom, Lauren Mokarry, and Cayla Bozovich

Relationship Advice

1,685 Listeners

Relationship Radio: Marriage, Sex, Limerence & Avoiding Divorce by Dr. Joe Beam & Kimberly Beam Holmes: Experts in Fixing Marriages & Saving Relationships

Relationship Radio: Marriage, Sex, Limerence & Avoiding Divorce

500 Listeners

The Mindset Mentor by Rob Dial

The Mindset Mentor

13,478 Listeners

Love Life With Matthew Hussey by Matthew Hussey

Love Life With Matthew Hussey

2,680 Listeners

Relationships Made Easy by Dr. Abby Medcalf

Relationships Made Easy

464 Listeners

On Purpose with Jay Shetty by iHeartPodcasts

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

27,077 Listeners

LET’S TALK ATTACHMENTS by Jessica Da Silva, LMFT

LET’S TALK ATTACHMENTS

265 Listeners

The Thais Gibson Podcast by Thais Gibson

The Thais Gibson Podcast

273 Listeners

On Attachment by Stephanie Rigg

On Attachment

964 Listeners

Jillian on Love by Jillian Turecki | QCODE

Jillian on Love

1,355 Listeners

The Mel Robbins Podcast by Mel Robbins

The Mel Robbins Podcast

20,918 Listeners

The Sabrina Zohar Show by The Sabrina Zohar Show

The Sabrina Zohar Show

4,652 Listeners

The Stay or Go Podcast for Women Considering Divorce by Britta Jo

The Stay or Go Podcast for Women Considering Divorce

120 Listeners

The Love Doc Podcast by Dr. Sarah Hensley

The Love Doc Podcast

157 Listeners