Live IFS

401:⏫️ Christine A. revisits


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🔸Boulder of suffering. I don't have instructions for this.
2️⃣ Helpless Bob, and a part that needed me to be fine.


📌 Christine followed up (re #1):


you had asked what selfs answer might be to this parts repeated question of “what do i do with the Boulder? All this pain and suffering, wtf do i do?” Self had responded “IFS” as a possible answer. 


As I sat more in that response; It felt like its meaning was broader than just my own personal IFS work. As in, perhaps what is “to be done” with this Boulder of pain and things we can’t make sense of… this Boulder will be imperative to the work we do with others moving forward. A sense that this Boulder and the hard questions it presents may be exactly what I’m meant to help others navigate as well my own parts.


(then later)


the part trying to get to the outside resources (holding the boulder): 


In that call it expressed that if it could, it would want to help the system be cared for in other ways, get those resources and that connection. 


And at another point we talked about recognizing when self is present more, and how that would be helpful to this part. 


I’ve noticed recently a part helping me to take in outside help and love more. To notice when someone is expressing care and to open to that more, rather than skipping past it. 
It’s felt like it’s helping me get those outside resources simply by being more present and open to them when they show up. It’s felt nourishing. Like allowing more self energy to be present when others show me care
A really impactful shift

🔹 Parts:

  • P: can't get it right
  • P: hilarious you think you know what right is
  • 2️⃣

    • P: Bob, the beat up dummy . Immobilized
    • P: get over it
    • P: we need to be fine. To be helpless and hurt means to be
    • E: not accepted. Like 5yo, keep secret, don’t acknowledge reality.
    • 🎓 What I'd like to do differently:

      I think I am demonstrating "fast is slow" here. I detected the emotion at end of call but didn’t feel I had time to attend to it in the way it deserved. Call started late, parts of me were itching to go do whatever else, and I switched to explaining mode.

      2️⃣

      If last call was too cognitive, this time my brain kinda under-functioning. Been one of those days where I'm throwing away the banana and keeping the peel. Lots of dreams, parts work, and yes even some social stuff going on lately. Christine holds me accountable, is courageous and direct, which serves as great a stretch for my parts (some discomfort in the moment, most appreciated in the big picture)


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