On today’s podcast, I chat with Dr. Irina Diyankova, certified IFS therapist, IFS clinical consultant, and Lead Trainer with the IFS Institute. We explore the fascinating intersection of IFS and neurodivergence, a topic she knows intimately from both her lived and professional experience.

We talk about time blindness, sensory sensitivities, what gets mistaken for trauma but might be hardwiring, and how IFS therapists can differentiate. We also get into self-accommodation, the limits of coping skills, and why healing through IFS is a lifelong journey.

I loved my conversation with Irina and felt uplifted and inspired by her beautiful Self Energy. I’m excited to bring this episode to you. 

✨ Don’t miss my extended video interview with Irina on The One Inside Substack. You’ll also find a gentle, creative meditation Irina led designed especially for neurodiverse folks to connect with parts of their nervous system. Bring crayons and curiosity.

 

Key Takeaways:

• “Healing doesn't always bring rainbows and butterflies.” Irina talks about the moment she realized her nervous system challenges weren’t just about unhealed trauma.

• How do you tell the difference between parts and hardwiring? Irina walks us through how she listens for what’s left after unburdening and what that might mean.

• “Coping skills that work for others might not work for you—and that’s not a failure.”

• Why traditional therapeutic approaches (like exposure therapy) can be harmful for neurodivergent clients—and what to do instead.

• “I have to accommodate myself.” Irina shares how self-acceptance and sensory regulation opened up a whole new window of tolerance.

• We also talk about Irina’s upcoming book, Becoming an IFS Therapist: A Journey to One’s Self, which offers practices and reflections for IFS therapists.

  Mentioned In This Episode:

The Science of Calm free online summit April 21 - May 4, 2025

“Applying IFS with autistic and ADHD adults through neurodiversity affirming lens” two-day workshop, May 30-31, 2025.

Irina's book: Becoming an IFS Therapist: A Journey to One's Self

 

About Dr. Irina Diyankova

Dr. Irina Diyankova is a licensed psychologist, certified IFS therapist, and Lead Trainer with the IFS Institute. She specializes in the treatment of psychological trauma and related conditions, including PTSD, Dissociative Disorders, and Anxiety and Mood Disorders. Based in Tennessee, Irina offers professional consultations, workshops, and trainings for mental health professionals interested in learning the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model. She is also an IFS Approved Clinical Consultant, known for her thoughtful, neurodiversity-affirming approach to teaching and therapy.

  Episode Sponsors:

IFS Demoz 

Curious what Internal Family Systems looks like in action? Join IFS Demoz, a live demonstration series led by IFS pioneer Mike Elkin. Each week, Mike takes on real-world challenges through one-on-one role play, modeling IFS techniques in real time. Whether you're new to IFS or a seasoned practitioner, these sessions offer powerful insights into how the model truly works. Each demo includes an open, inclusive Q&A—so bring your curiosity. Live sessions happen weekly on Zoom, and recordings are available to all registrants.

Inner World Collective

A supportive community can change everything when you're learning and applying the IFS model. The Collective is an online space for IFS therapists and practitioners to connect with like-minded professionals, build confidence, refine their skills, and feel truly supported as they bring IFS into their clinical work. Inside, you'll find expert consultation, supervised and peer-led practice groups, monthly guest speakers, recorded demos and demo groups, and Self-led workshops—all designed to help you flourish as an IFS practitioner.

  About The One Inside:

Check out The One Inside Substack community to access all episodes, exclusive extended interviews, meditations and exercises, and more. 

Find The One Inside Self-Led merch at The One Inside store

Watch video clips from select episodes on  The One Inside on YouTube

Follow Tammy on Instagram @ifstammy and on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

Jeff Schrum co-produces The One Inside. He is a writer and IFS Level 2 practitioner who helps clinicians and creatives express themselves with clarity and confidence.

Are you new to IFS or want a simple way to get to know yourself? Tammy's book, "The One Inside: Thirty Days to your Authentic Self" is a PERFECT place to start. 

Sign up for Tammy's email list and get a free "Get to know a Should part of you" meditation on her website

Tammy is grateful for Jack Reardon who created music for the podcast. Jack is a graduate of Derek Scott’s IFS Stepping Stones Program.  

If you are interested in sponsoring an episode or two of The One Inside Podcast please contact Tammy at [email protected]

On today’s podcast, I chat with Ashley Booth, a psychedelic-assisted psychotherapist, trainer, researcher—and former oceanographer! Ashley’s new book, Quieting the Storm Within: A Simple, Intuitive Guide to Your Inner World, is beautifully written and illustrated, accessible, and deeply rooted in IFS.

We talk about why she chose to create a picture book for adults, how parts mapping can be playful and powerful, and how IFS and psychedelics both point us toward connection with our parts, with the natural world, and with something larger than ourselves.

Ashley shares her journey from marine science to healing work, the grief that led her there, and the awe and Self Energy that keep her grounded in the work today.

Key Takeaways:

• “IFS is such a visual model.” Ashley talks about why she chose to make a picture book for adults and how dyslexia, digital art, and parts mapping all played a role.

• What is the “parts unstack” exercise and how can it help externalize what’s happening inside?

• “All parts are either the steward of a need or trying to get that need met.” Ashley walks us through her reframing of protectors as helpers and the importance of naming needs with compassion.

• How her own psychedelic experiences influenced the metaphors in the book, and how IFS supports integration and meaning-making.

• “Self is the conduit.” Ashley shares how visual reminders, art, and little moments of awe can help us reconnect to Self Energy in everyday life.

Favorite Quote:

"We all need to be able to connect with the love and the compassion that's available to all of us that doesn't judge. And our parts need to be held by that, right? And our Self is the conduit for that to happen." – Ashley Booth

About Ashley Booth

Ashley Booth, LCSW, is a psychedelic-assisted psychotherapist, IFS practitioner, researcher, and educator. She’s the author of Quieting the Storm Within: A Simple, Intuitive Guide to Your Inner World, releasing in March 2025. Ashley is also the founder of IFS and Beyond, where she offers consultation, integration, and teaching at the intersection of Internal Family Systems and psychedelic therapy.

A former oceanographer, Ashley brings deep curiosity and reverence for nature into her work, helping people reconnect with their inner and outer worlds. Learn more at ifsandbeyond.com or ashleybooth.net.

Episode Sponsors:

IFS Demoz 

Curious what Internal Family Systems looks like in action? Join IFS Demoz, a live demonstration series led by IFS pioneer Mike Elkin. Each week, Mike takes on real-world challenges through one-on-one role play, modeling IFS techniques in real time. Whether you're new to IFS or a seasoned practitioner, these sessions offer powerful insights into how the model truly works. Each demo includes an open, inclusive Q&A—so bring your curiosity. Live sessions happen weekly on Zoom, and recordings are available to all registrants.

Inner World Collective

A supportive community can change everything when you're learning and applying the IFS model. The Collective is an online space for IFS therapists and practitioners to connect with like-minded professionals, build confidence, refine their skills, and feel truly supported as they bring IFS into their clinical work. Inside, you'll find expert consultation, supervised and peer-led practice groups, monthly guest speakers, recorded demos and demo groups, and Self-led workshops—all designed to help you flourish as an IFS practitioner.

  About The One Inside:

Check out The One Inside Substack community to access all episodes, exclusive extended interviews, meditations and exercises, and more. 

Find The One Inside Self-Led merch at The One Inside store

Watch video clips from select episodes on  The One Inside on YouTube

Follow Tammy on Instagram @ifstammy and on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

Jeff Schrum co-produces The One Inside podcast. He’s a writer and IFS Level 2 practitioner who helps clinicians share their work and voice with clarity and confidence.

Are you new to IFS or want a simple way to get to know yourself? Tammy's book, "The One Inside: Thirty Days to your Authentic Self" is a PERFECT place to start. 

Sign up for Tammy's email list and get a free "Get to know a Should part of you" meditation on her website

Tammy is grateful for Jack Reardon who created music for the podcast. Jack is a graduate of Derek Scott’s IFS Stepping Stones Program.  

If you are interested in sponsoring an episode or two of The One Inside Podcast please contact Tammy at [email protected]

 

 

On today’s podcast, I chat with Tanis Allen, a certified IFS therapist and longtime member of the IFS community. Tanis has been around since the earliest days of the model, and she just released a new book called The Self-Led IFS Workbook: Learn IFS Skills to Understand and Love All Your Parts published by Penguin Random House.

We talk about her early experiences learning IFS in the ‘90s, her work with clients struggling with suicidality and eating disorders, and what it was like to write a book that makes the model accessible to everyone. Tanis shares insights on how to begin IFS on your own, the challenge of translating an oral and experiential tradition into clear written steps, and her favorite exercise for working with stuck parts.

Key Takeaways:

• “Your awareness is the beginning of Self.” Tanis explains how simply noticing what’s happening in your body or mind is the first step into the IFS process.

• How do you know you’re in a part? Tanis breaks down how to begin this work, even if you’re doing it on your own.

• “IFS is such a strong community… we sit in circles together and learn this together.” Tanis reflects on the power of shared learning and the influence of the “wise women” who helped shape the model.

• Why she added her own transcripts of parts work to the book, and what she discovered about herself through writing them.

• Her favorite exercise (the Four Drawing Exercise) and why it’s so transformational for working with stuck parts.

Favorite Quote:

“Clients will often ask me, you know, does this make me like a multiple personality person or something? And, you know, the answer is no, we're all made this way, actually. And it does feel kind of weird sometimes. But the more we do it, the more we practice it, the less weird it feels." -- Tanis Allen

About Tanis Allen

Tanis Allen, LMSW, ACSW, is the author of The Self-Led Internal Family Systems Workbook: Learn to Use IFS Skills to Understand and Love All Your Parts. A member of the IFS community for over 25 years, Tanis has spent her career practicing, teaching, and living the IFS model. She serves as a mentor and IFS clinical consultant for other therapists and is the founder and director of the IFS Great Lakes Retreat, a beloved annual gathering held each fall in northern Michigan.

Episode Sponsor: Life Architect

✨ Get access to 3 IFS webinars organized by Life Architect (featuring Einat Bronstein, Kay Gardner & Robert Falconer, and Ann Sinko) and receive a 30% discount on selected IFS workshops: https://lifearchitect.com/tammy/ ✨

 

Take a sneak peak at The One Inside Substack community

Check out The One Inside Self-Led merch at The One Inside store

Watch video clips from select episodes on  The One Inside on YouTube

Follow Tammy on Instagram @ifstammy and on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

Jeff Schrum co-produces The One Inside Podcast. He is a writer, counselor, and IFS Level 2 practitioner.  

Are you new to IFS or want a simple way to get to know yourself? Tammy's book, "The One Inside: Thirty Days to your Authentic Self" is a PERFECT place to start. 

Sign up for Tammy's email list and get a free "Get to know a Should part of you" meditation on her website

Tammy is grateful for Jack Reardon who created music for the podcast. Jack is a graduate of Derek Scott’s IFS Stepping Stones Program.  

If you are interested in sponsoring an episode or two of The One Inside Podcast please contact Tammy at [email protected]

On today’s podcast, I chat with two brilliant IFS lead trainers, Pam Krause and Crystal Jones. We learn about their journeys to becoming IFS lead trainers, the evolution of the model's cultural awareness and inclusivity, and what it’s been like to co-lead the newly updated IFS Online Circle together. We also dip our toes into a little controversy—should we skip the 6Fs?

I loved hearing from them what it means to stay grounded in the core of the model while continuing to expand and evolve with care, community, and curiosity.

Key Takeaways:

• “The core of the model has not changed at all.” Pam and Crystal reflect on how the IFS model has stayed steady while the perspectives, voices, and applications have continued to expand.

• How do different cultures experience Self Energy? What happens when we listen for joy, dance, chi, and loyalty as expressions of Self?

• How the model is evolving as more identities enter the space, adding richness and context.

• The 6 F’s: should we still teach them? Pam and Crystal give context, clarity, and some new language around how and why the F’s are helpful—especially for beginners.

• How the model teaches the steps to reach clients’ protectors.

• We also explore mentoring, teaching, and the beautiful full-circle (pun intended!) relationship Pam and Crystal have developed through years of working together.

Favorite Quote:

“People are saying how they want to see themselves in the model, right? They want to see how it applies to them. And if we are not aware of our clients' identities, then we might miss it if we're looking for the eight C’s.” – Crystal Jones

 

📺 Check out my extended video interview with Crystal and Pam over on Substack.

 

About the Guests:

Crystal R. Jones is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Lead IFS-I Trainer who passionately shares the healing essence of the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model worldwide. She is known for her embodied compassion, relatability, and heart-led approach to this transformative work. Crystal is deeply dedicated to creating safe, affirming spaces for marginalized communities—particularly Black women and women of color—where they can feel connected, seen, heard, and valued as they embark on their healing journeys, both individually and collectively. With a fervent commitment to equity and accessibility, Crystal teaches the IFS model in a way that speaks to the global majority, ensuring its adaptability, inclusivity, and relevance across diverse populations.

Pamela Krause, MSW, LCSW, is a Certified IFS Therapist who began her journey with IFS in 1998. She is a Senior Lead Trainer for the Internal Family Systems Institute, where she created and ran two Leadership Training Programs in addition to teaching all three levels of trainings. Her sub-specialty is adapting the IFS model for adolescents and younger children, a topic which she developed a Level 2 training program in partnership with Carmen Jimenez-Pride.

 

Episode Sponsor: IFS Institute

IFS Institute is now enrolling for the ALL-new IFS Online Circle program, a  6-month foundational course for professionals looking to provide an IFS lens to their practice.  This updated and enhanced program offers fresh insights, expanded demonstrations, and deeper experiential exercises, all led by two of the Institute's top trainers, Pam Krause and Crystal Jones.

 

Take a sneak peak at The One Inside Substack community

Check out The One Inside Self-Led merch at The One Inside store

Watch video clips from select episodes on  The One Inside on YouTube

Follow Tammy on Instagram @ifstammy and on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

Jeff Schrum co-produces The One Inside Podcast. He is a writer, counselor, and IFS Level 2 practitioner.  

Are you new to IFS or want a simple way to get to know yourself? Tammy's book, "The One Inside: Thirty Days to your Authentic Self" is a PERFECT place to start. 

Sign up for Tammy's email list and get a free "Get to know a Should part of you" meditation on her website

Tammy is grateful for Jack Reardon who created music for the podcast. Jack is a graduate of Derek Scott’s IFS Stepping Stones Program.  

If you are interested in sponsoring an episode or two of The One Inside Podcast please contact Tammy at [email protected]

On today’s podcast we celebrate 200 episodes of The One Inside!

I take the guest’s seat as my podcasting partner and co-producer, Jeff Schrum, leads the interview. We reflect on six seasons of guests, the show's impact on my life and work with clients, and why unblending is the real magic of IFS. We also dive into creative projects on the horizon, including my new mini-book on numbness and launching The One Inside Substack community. 

Key Takeaways:

• Jeff and I talk about the fun behind the scenes of finding guests, editing interviews, creating show notes and graphics, and releasing an episode.

• My favorite part of the IFS model, and how I use it in my daily life.

• How six years of hosting this podcast has shaped not just my work, but my personal life and how I relate to my own parts.

• “Unblending is the hard part.” We get into why unblending is the heart of the IFS model, and how simply creating space between parts can be transformational.

• My controversial opinion on unburdenings.

• “There are a million reasons not to do the thing.” We talk about parts that hold us back from starting creative projects—whether it’s a podcast, book, or blog—and how to work with them.

• My likes and dislikes...like how I like unblending, and how I dislike when my parts won’t unblend. See also: maple syrup, apple cider, and movie theater popcorn. 

• "If I waited every other week to meet with my IFS therapist, IFS wouldn’t be in my bones. You have to be doing this every day. Even if it’s just small moments of awareness. That’s the work."  

This episode is full of laughs, reflection, and some behind-the-scenes stories you haven’t heard before. I hope you enjoy it!

Episode Sponsor: IFS Institute

IFS Institute is now enrolling for the ALL-new IFS Online Circle program, a  6-month foundational course for professionals looking to provide an IFS lens to their practice.  This updated and enhanced program offers fresh insights, expanded demonstrations, and deeper experiential exercises, all led by two of the Institute's top trainers, Pam Krause and Crystal Jones.

Take a sneak peak at The One Inside Substack community

Check out The One Inside Self-Led merch at The One Inside store

Watch video clips from select episodes on  The One Inside on YouTube

Follow Tammy on Instagram @ifstammy and on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

Jeff Schrum co-produces The One Inside Podcast. He is a writer, counselor, and IFS Level 2 practitioner.  

Are you new to IFS or want a simple way to get to know yourself? Tammy's book, "The One Inside: Thirty Days to your Authentic Self" is a PERFECT place to start. 

Sign up for Tammy's email list and get a free "Get to know a Should part of you" meditation on her website

Tammy is grateful for Jack Reardon who created music for the podcast. Jack is a graduate of Derek Scott’s IFS Stepping Stones Program.  

If you are interested in sponsoring an episode or two of The One Inside Podcast please contact Tammy at [email protected]

On today’s podcast, I chat with Ruth Culver, a Level 3 trained and certified IFS practitioner. We look at Ruth’s Survive and Thrive Spiral, a visual map that connects the nervous system and IFS in a way that just makes sense. We also talk about her work with IFS Constellations, a group process that brings parts work into a shared, somatic experience, and Drawing into Self, a creative way to explore and externalize parts through colors, lines, and shapes.

Key Takeaways:

• “Parts all have stories, don’t they?” Ruth explains how mapping parts onto her Survive and Thrive Spiral can help people unblend and understand their nervous system responses.

• How can we recognize if we’re in Flop, Fix, or Flow? Ruth introduces these simple but powerful words to track nervous system states and move toward Self Energy.

• We can be in multiple nervous system states at the same time. 

• Ruth describes how different parts may be in fixing mode, collapsing mode, or Self Energy mode—all at once.

• How does IFS Constellations allow for deeper healing? Ruth shares how this group process creates profound moments of witnessing, connection, and transformation.

• What happens when we let parts express themselves through drawing? Ruth walks us through Drawing into Self, a process that invites parts to communicate beyond words.

Favorite Quote:

"So, to me, the healing process is story-based, and it is imaginative. At the core of healing is a reimagining. And that’s what we can do with story." – Ruth Culver

About Ruth:   Ruth Culver is a Level 3 trained & Certified IFS Practitioner based in Brighton UK, working with adolescents, adults and groups in private practice. After 25 years in charity event management, she burned out, re-trained as a hypnotherapist then found IFS in 2017. Her passion for embodiment and externalisation has led to 3 IFS integrations: 1. The Survive/Thrive Spiral: 2. IFS Constellations, and 3. Drawing into Self. 

 

Episode Sponsor: Pisgah Coaching Institute

 

Check out The One Inside Self-Led merch at The One Inside store

Watch video clips from select episodes on  The One Inside on YouTube

Follow Tammy on Instagram @ifstammy and on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

Jeff Schrum co-produces The One Inside Podcast. He is a writer, counselor, and IFS Level 2 practitioner.  

Are you new to IFS or want a simple way to get to know yourself? Tammy's book, "The One Inside: Thirty Days to your Authentic Self" is a PERFECT place to start. 

Sign up for Tammy's email list and get a free "Get to know a Should part of you" meditation on her website

Tammy is grateful for Jack Reardon who created music for the podcast. Jack is a graduate of Derek Scott’s IFS Stepping Stones Program.  

If you are interested in sponsoring an episode or two of The One Inside Podcast please contact Tammy at [email protected]

On today's episode I chat with Jodie Benveniste, an IFS-trained psychologist and author. Through her personal healing journey using IFS she discovered how fiction writing and storytelling can be a powerful path to self-understanding and emotional healing.

Jodie and I talk about her debut novel, Never, Not Ever, a YA romance that integrates IFS therapy into the story. We explore how fiction can serve as a safe space for transformation, why romance novels tap into Self Energy, and how the creative process mirrors the IFS journey. This conversation is all about the power of stories—both the ones we tell ourselves and the ones we read. I think you’re going to love it!

Key Takeaways:

• “Parts all have stories, don’t they?” Jodie shares how working with her parts allowed her to embrace fiction writing and how characters in a novel are not so different from the inner characters we meet in IFS.
• How does storytelling create a safe container for healing? 
• Story is a powerful adjunct to IFS therapy
• “I had a teen part who made me watch a rom-com 20 times!” -- How reconnecting with her younger parts helped shape her writing process.
• Teen fiction can support adult mental health, too!
• Why romance is the world’s most popular genre—and how it invites readers to expand their hearts and tap into Self Energy.
• What can we learn from the stories our parts tell us? Jodie and I reflect on how parts hold onto old narratives and how fiction can help us imagine new possibilities.
• How fiction can invite teens to learn about and explore mental health topics, destigmatizing therapy and showing how healing happens.

Favorite Quote:

"So, to me, the healing process is story-based, and it is imaginative. At the core of healing is a reimagining. And that’s what we can do with story." – Jodie Benveniste

About Jodie: Jodie Benveniste is an author and psychologist who writes heart-expanding young adult contemporary romance. She writes about love and friendships, family relationships, wellbeing, and mental health healing, introducing readers to their amazing inner world and its incredible depths. She’s been a psychologist in private practice, trusted parenting expert, organizational consultant, academic researcher, and Chair of the Board of an Independent School. But, at heart, she’s always been a writer. She now writes entertaining, unputdownable and heart-expanding fiction that has healing at its heart. 

 

Check out The One inside Self-Led merch at The One Inside store

Watch video clips from select episodes on  The One Inside on YouTube

Follow Tammy on Instagram @ifstammy and on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

Jeff Schrum co-produces The One Inside Podcast. He is a writer, counselor, and IFS Level 2 practitioner.  

Are you new to IFS or want a simple way to get to know yourself? Tammy's book, "The One Inside: Thirty Days to your Authentic Self" is a PERFECT place to start. 

Sign up for Tammy's email list and get a free "Get to know a Should part of you" meditation on her website

Tammy is grateful for Jack Reardon who created music for the podcast. Jack is a graduate of Derek Scott’s IFS Stepping Stones Program.  

If you are interested in sponsoring an episode or two of The One Inside Podcast please contact Tammy at [email protected]

On today's episode, I'm joined by Lara Krawchuk, a grief expert and IFS certifed therapist, to explore how the Internal Family Systems model helps us understand and tend to grief. We discuss continuing bonds, meaning making, ambiguous loss, grief-worthy losses, and unbraiding current loss from exiled trauma. While I have parts that avoid thinking about and discussing grief, Lara offers such a hopeful perspective on the grieving process and I'm so excited to share this episode with you. 

Key Takeaways:

• Grief is not about severing bonds, but shifting how we relate to them.
• Disenfranchised grief, like the end of a relationship or loss of health, is grief-worthy too.
• Grief invites us to explore the deeper meaning behind our losses and what they reveal about ourselves.
• Grief is both/and -- we are allowed to feel both grief and joy. 
• Welcoming grief, rather than trying to "move on," is crucial for healing.
• Turn towards grieving parts and allow them the space to be heard and honored.
• The importance of "unbraiding" exiled pain from present losses: "Does the part know this is different from the original Exile is has always protected?" 
• Continued bonds with those we've lost can be a profound source of comfort.

Favorite Quote: "Self is not freaked out by grief. Self is an exquisite witness to all pain." — Lara Krawchuk

About Lara: Lara Krawchuk is the owner and clinical director of Healing Concepts in West Chester, Pennsylvania, and the co-founder of Healing Perspectives, a continuing education resource for helping professionals looking to heal themselves, help their clients, and heal a broken-hearted world. She is an IFS certified therapist and consultant, a speaker, adjuct professor, and author with a passion for supporting those living with grief. 

 

Check out The One inside Self-Led merch at The One Inside store

Watch video clips from select episodes on  The One Inside on YouTube

Follow Tammy on Instagram @ifstammy and on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

Jeff Schrum co-produces The One Inside Podcast. He is a writer, counselor, and IFS Level 1 practitioner.  

Are you new to IFS or want a simple way to get to know yourself? Tammy's book, "The One Inside: Thirty Days to your Authentic Self" is a PERFECT place to start. 

Sign up for Tammy's email list and get a free "Get to know a Should part of you" meditation on her website

Tammy is grateful for Jack Reardon who created music for the podcast. Jack is a graduate of Derek Scott’s IFS Stepping Stones Program.  

If you are interested in sponsoring an episode or two of The One Inside Podcast please contact Tammy at [email protected]

In this episode I chat with Ralph De La Rosa, a meditation teacher, therapist, and author of Outshining Trauma. Ralph shares his personal journey of healing from PTSD, depression, and addiction, and how IFS helped him access Self Energy beyond traditional meditation.

Key Takeaways:

• Self Energy and Buddhist concepts like Buddha-nature share striking similarities.
• Meditation can be a powerful tool for parts work, offering a structured way to access Self.
• What happens when Self meets our most burdened parts?
• Self Energy as a reparenting force
• Instead of rejecting painful emotions or defensive parts, he encourages holding them with warmth, like placing them in the sunlight of Self.
• Trauma constricts and healing expands
• Start with Self rather than diving directly into the pain.
• Parts are just like people
• Radical self-compassion as meeting every part of ourselves—including the ones that hold fear, addiction, or pain—with love, rather than trying to suppress or fix them.
• Reparenting happens naturally when we turn toward our parts with compassion.

Favorite Quote: "One thing I’ve learned from direct experience of Self is that it can expand to be bigger than any level of heartache, any sense of brokenness, any sense of wounding, no matter how deep, no matter how wide, no matter how big. Self-energy can expand to fill the entire room you’re sitting in. If you practice with it, if you practice with it and your parts, we could begin to trust that." – Ralph De La Rosa

About Ralph De La Rosa: Ralph De La Rosa is a psychotherapist, meditation teacher, and author of Outshining Trauma: A New Vision of Radical Self-Compassion. His work integrates IFS, neuroscience, and Buddhist wisdom to help people navigate healing and transformation.

Check out his upcoming online course: www.ralphdelarosa.com/breaking-cycles-course  

Episode Sponsor: Sentur 

Propel your healing journey forward with an IFS-inspired trauma-informed digital mental health companion designed for real transformation. Download the Sentur app here

 

Check out The One inside Self-Led merch at The One Inside store

Watch video clips from select episodes on  The One Inside on YouTube

Follow Tammy on Instagram @ifstammy and on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

Jeff Schrum co-produces The One Inside Podcast. He is a writer, counselor, and IFS Level 1 practitioner.  

Are you new to IFS or want a simple way to get to know yourself? Tammy's book, "The One Inside: Thirty Days to your Authentic Self" is a PERFECT place to start. 

Sign up for Tammy's email list and get a free "Get to know a Should part of you" meditation on her website

Tammy is grateful for Jack Reardon who created music for the podcast. Jack is a graduate of Derek Scott’s IFS Stepping Stones Program.  

If you are interested in sponsoring an episode or two of The One Inside Podcast please contact Tammy at [email protected]

On today’s episode I chat with Rick Kahler, a pioneer in integrating financial planning and psychology and a certified IFS practitioner. We explore how Internal Family Systems can transform our relationship with money, uncovering hidden beliefs and legacy burdens that shape financial behaviors.

Rick shares his journey from financial planner to financial therapist, explaining how emotions—not logic—drive most financial decisions. He introduces key concepts like money scripts, financial protectors, and the internal financial system, showing how understanding these parts can help people move from financial stuckness to greater clarity and freedom.

Key Takeaways:

• Money isn’t just about numbers—it’s deeply tied to our emotions, beliefs, and childhood experiences.

• Many financial struggles come from polarized parts—a part that wants to save and a part that wants to spend.

• How do money scripts—unconscious beliefs about money—shape our financial decisions without us even realizing it?

• Financial shame is often greater than other types of shame, making finances one of the hardest topics to talk about.

• Legacy burdens around money are passed down through generations, influencing our financial behaviors in ways we may not recognize.

Favorite Quote: "Every part has a good intention. Every money script is put in place, every burden is put in place with a good intention…it just doesn’t know things are a little different now." – Rick Kahler​

About Rick Kahler: Rick Kahler is a certified financial planner, financial therapist, and IFS practitioner. He is a founding board member and past chair of the Financial Therapy Association and the creator of IFS-Informed Financial Therapy. Rick has authored seven books and hosts The Financial Therapy Podcast.

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 Episode Sponsor: Michelle Glass

**************************************************************************************** Check out our new Self-Led merch at The One Inside store

Watch video clips from select episodes on  The One Inside on YouTube

Follow Tammy on Instagram @ifstammy and on Facebook at The One Inside with Tammy Sollenberger.

Jeff Schrum co-produces The One Inside Podcast. He is a writer, counselor, and IFS Level 1 practitioner.  

Are you new to IFS or want a simple way to get to know yourself? Tammy's book, "The One Inside: Thirty Days to your Authentic Self" is a PERFECT place to start. 

Sign up for Tammy's email list and get a free "Get to know a Should part of you" meditation on her website

Tammy is grateful for Jack Reardon who created music for the podcast. Jack is a graduate of Derek Scott’s IFS Stepping Stones Program.  

If you are interested in sponsoring an episode or two of The One Inside Podcast please contact Tammy at [email protected]