45 Forward

After earning her undergraduate and master’s degrees specializing in marketing, public relations and advertising, Hilary Topper embarked on a corporate career working for major PR agencies in New York City, in addition to two large non-profit organizations as director of public relations and development. Then, some 30 years ago, Hilary went out on her own, founding HJMT Public Relations and building a roster of prominent clients across the country. Along the way she became an expert and widely recognized influencer in social media marketing, writing one of the earliest books on the subject, called “Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Social Media, but were afraid to ask.” In her late 40s, she decided to give herself a real run for the money—literally. She was never an athlete, but decided to start running, and by age 53, she found that running was not enough. She became a triathlete. In today’s episode, Hilary talks about the daily challenge of organizing and managing the multi-hyphenate life as entrepreneur-author-podcaster-blogger-adjunct professor-marathoner-triathlete-coach. It has been a successful journey, but often a roller-coaster, as she has been forced to make major adjustments in response to life-altering events, like 9/11, the 2008 economic meltdown, and most recently, of course, the pandemic. Three years ago, Hilary reorganized her business; she no longer managing a staff of 25 people but continues to run a concierge PR firm. She also produces two blogs and a weekly podcast and has written a second book (a third is on the way), while preparing for the next triathlon and coaching beginner triathletes. No longer as engaged in her former high-adrenaline business world, Hilary points out one unmistakable benefit: She’s much happier now.

When the pandemic shut down most of America last year, the arts and entertainment community was faced with a monumental challenge. How could they survive without attracting in-person audiences to their events? Surely, they could try to create online facsimiles of their events—virtual tours, exhibitions, concerts and performances—but would these activities be dynamic enough to attract broad interest from the public? That’s when Holly Gordon and Waldo Cabrera came up with a provocative new approach to the virtual art show. In today’s episode, Holly and Waldo describe their unique collaborative journey, creating exhibitions featuring artists aged 50 and older at a prominent Long Island museum. Holly, a nationally recognized fine art and documentary photographer, served as curator of these exhibits, which were sponsored by AARP New York. Waldo, an award-winning journalist with years of experience in advertising, marketing and video production, handled the many technical tasks. The resulting presentations are no mere pictures at an exhibition. Together, Holly and Wally tell the story of how they pieced together an assemblage of images, music, graphics, narration and commentary from dozens of artists into a cohesive, entertaining experience. “I’m the composer, Wally is the conductor who interprets the work,” says Holly. Both artists also stress the importance of the arts across the generations. Holly has long been an ardent advocate for older populations. And Waldo regularly bridges the generations through his years of work with film and video productions for children, including 4Kids Entertainment, the company that brought Pokémon to the United States. Indeed, their next exhibit focuses on intergenerational collaboration among artists. “We’re all 6-year-olds,” says Waldo. “We’re using art the same way. It’s entertaining, it has elements of surprise. It’s a roller coaster ride.”

When we plan for our later years, most of us consider factors like health, housing, financial security, lifestyle and caregiving, but we tend of overlook one distinct possibility: What if end up aging alone? Recent studies have found that between 30 and 35% of older adults in the U.S. are expected to age alone within the next decade. About 45% of older women will find themselves aging solo. Many of these “elder orphans” have no assistance in making financial decisions, no designated caregiver, little access to transportation, and no help in times of crisis. In today’s episode, host Ron Roel talks with Carol Marak, one of the nation’s premier experts in solo aging, about how to plan a safe and independent older life — even without family. Drawing initially from the experiences taking care of her parents, Carol created her own plan for self-care, self-reliance, and creating a family-like community; now she teaches other solo adults how to do the same. Carol will explain how to avoid some of the potential adverse effects of aging alone; describe specific ways to map out a solo aging plan; and how to access unique resources, such as her Group Coaching Support services and Elder Orphan Facebook Group. The ultimate goal: Helping people build the kind of strong support system they’ll need to solo age with confidence.

For many seniors, their retirement years mean a time when they eagerly look forward to doing whatever they want, whenever they want—and that often means seeing the world, unencumbered by work or family obligations. That plan, of course, was abruptly put on hold by Covid-19, which socially isolated most of us for months, and shuttered much of our economy, hitting the travel and hospitality industry especially hard. In recent months, life has returned— sort of—to normal, but this new normal is still filled with uncertainty and anxiety, as the pandemic has taken unexpected turns with the Delta variant and large portions of our population who remain unvaccinated. Clearly, we’re seeing a pent-up desire to travel, but how do we do so, when health requirements, government policies and industry protocols seem to change from week to week? In today’s episode, Bruce Frankel, the President of The Mindful Traveler, tackles the many challenges facing the today’s traveler, offering a wealth of sound, pragmatic advice, the latest technology, resources and information, and ways to plan rewarding vacations—while managing the inevitable things you DIDN’T plan for. Bruce first entered the travel industry in 1989, but he brings a broad perspective to the field, with a career that has included running retail storefront businesses and home-based companies, as well as a 10-year stint in corporate banking industry, specializing in marketing and management. He sees himself as a travel “consumer advocate,” working closely with clients to help them choose vacation options that are best for them—never mind what the reviewers and pundits say on social media. In today’s conversation, Bruce will outline key steps to being well-prepared for today’s shifting travel protocols, health and safety requirements, masks, testing and other documentation, whether going abroad or across the country. And he will talk about the latest consumer travel trends, from small, personalized “bubble groups,” to self-drive country tours and “city stays” that focus on one urban location, with day trips to other places Whether his travelers are over-45 or under, Bruce’s ultimate goal is not simply to arrange trips, but help them fulfill dreams, creating unique, enduring experiences, wherever they may go.

Louis Theodore may be a retired professor, but he is anything but the retiring type. After a distinguished career teaching chemical engineering at Manhattan College and serving as director of the Graduate Program (primarily responsible for his program achieving a No. 2 national ranking) Lou has continued to lead an extraordinarily productive life as educator, scholar, author, basketball fan, coach, consultant mentor, grandfather—and most recently, inventor. At 87, he is hardly slowing down. In today’s episode, Lou describes a life story that started out in New York City’s Hell’s Kitchen and took him to the top of a complex scientific field as an internationally recognized expert in environmental management. Lou has written 131 text and reference books, covering an expansive range of topics, including environment ethics, air pollution control equipment, nanotechnology, and most recently, a second edition of “Introduction to Environmental Management,” which he co-wrote with his wife, Mary. He currently serves as a part-time consultant to Theodore Tutorials, a firm specializing in providing training needs to industry, government and academia. Along the way, Lou has also maintained his lifelong passion for basketball, supporting youth leagues and publishing a decidedly non-technical book, “Basketball Coaching 101,” an eclectic compendium of personal stories, a short history of the game and a spray of tips and commentary from other coaches, player, writers and fans. (Not surprisingly, he’s working on a second edition of this book, too.) Lou’s life highlights the importance of keeping close social connection over the year, with colleagues, former students and basketball players—long-standing friendships as well as new ones. And as a testament to his enduing curiosity and creativity, Lou has just been awarded two U.S. patents relating to processes for obtaining drinking water from geothermal energy and the combustion of fossil fuels. There’s a growing shortage in potable water across the planet, and Lou is intent on joining the search for solutions.

Like it or not, the pandemic has pushed many of us into the virtual world every day—a constant barrage of technology, from Zoom meetings, to webinars, online programs and projects, internet searches, emails, texts and social media. Of course, in a time of social distancing and often isolation, technology has been an essential tool in keeping us connected and productive. At the same time, it’s often challenging, complicated, confusing, and well, exasperating, when we can’t figure out how to use our devices at critical moments. And it can be especially hard for older folks—those who are decidedly not “digital natives” and may struggle to learn and keep up with high tech skills. In today’s episode, two experienced experts, Wendy Weiss and Robyn Berger-Gaston, will talk about how to help seniors (and perhaps the rest of us) embrace technology and avoid being overwhelmed by “techfusion.” Wendy, a former Wall Street professional, is an entrepreneur who provides personalized technology training to individuals and businesses on the use of everyday technological devices. Robyn, for her part, oversees several programs for a large Long Island nonprofit agency, including SeniorNet, which provides computer and technology training for people ages 50 and over. Together, they will address a range of issues, programs and approaches to help seniors learn new tech skills. What are the biggest challenges and needs? What kinds of courses, one-on-one classes and intergenerational programs are most effective? Where can people get “tech tips” and other useful resources? And when people are overwhelmed, how can you encourage and instill the confidence in them, that they can manage technology—and enhance their lives in the process?

As with many challenges in life, having the right mindset is the key to success. And so it is with the process of aging. Understanding the mindset of seniors—not just at a clinical level—is vital to providing the services they need and ensuring that they live the best lives possible. But how do you know what seniors really want? What are they thinking at a deeper level and how do we ask questions that get to these answers? In today’s episode, Deanne O’Rear-Cameron, a personal development consultant, aging-in-place specialist and senior advocate, relates how her many experiences in the senior and health care fields have helped gain valuable insights into both the mindset of seniors, as well as the mindset of the culture that cares for them. Deanne, who serves as chair of the Las Vegas Senior Citizens Advisory Board, as well posts on multiple other councils and organizations, talks about how to teach seniors (and the rest of us) through a distinctive process of repetitive education—but repetition that’s fun, not just the same old dry information and advice. Share, care, and ask a lot of questions of seniors—and if you’re not sure what the answers are, ask again. Deanne’s approach teaches seniors how to be proactive about their life, rather than reactive. Not being prepared for getting older in life creates anxiety, but we can use motivating solutions to address the inevitable challenges of aging. If you want to be a dancer at 90, Deanne says, you need to be active in your 50s and 60s. And even as you get older and less active, you can enjoy things in a different way. You can go there in your mind; where the mind goes, the body follows, she says. Aging in place should always include mindset among its guiding principles. Indeed, the best anti-aging tool we have is our mind.

As your parents get older, there may come a time when it’s clear they would lead a safer, healthier, and more productive life by transitioning from their current home to an assisted living community. But how do you handle the many issues surrounding such a move? It’s complicated. And emotional. There are lots of choices, and a host of questions. In this episode, Julie Wexler, who has spent more than 25 years in a variety of eldercare settings, walks us through the process — step by step — of finding the right community for your parents. Julie, the Director of Business Development for The Bristal Assisted Living, spells out the spectrum of housing options, describing different kinds of services, care, amenities, and lifestyle features that individual communities may offer. How do you assemble a list of potential places, and are there professionals and other resources to help you assess the best fit for your parents? Then there’s the continuing Covid question: What factors should we consider and what questions should we ask about health and safety protocols when we visit prospective communities? Making the transition to assisted living can often be hard on the entire family, but by being proactive and not waiting for a crisis, the move can offer an exceptionally positive experience, creating a new sense of independence, better health and social engagement for our loved ones. Indeed, Julie believes that all seniors, even as the face the physical challenges of aging, deserve to live a full, active, supportive, and meaningful life.

When Hudson Cooper entered college, he majored in biology, intending to prepare for a career in medicine. But medicine wasn’t for him, so he went to law school. The practice of law wasn’t for him either, except for a diverting stint as an administrative law judge for the New York Taxi & Limousine Commission. Instead, Hudson decided to embark on a career taking on a series of job challenges with the equivalent risk somewhere between hang-gliding and bungee-jumping. In today’s episode, Hudson recounts how he launched his writing career with exactly one published article to his name, landing a job writing a book about baseball for young adults that went into 10 printings and led to another book about football, and eventually 11 other books. Then another leap of courage and confidence—as a stand-up comic. Serendipitously, an agent in the audience one night approached him an offered him a role in the Matthew Broderick version of Godzilla. From there he went on to a series of roles on TV shows like “Law and Order,” “Madame Secretary” and “Bull.” And once again in his latest chapter, he's returned to writing, landing a job as a weekly newspaper columnist, through his usual combination of persistence, resilience, risk-taking and readiness to act when unexpected opportunities arise.

There has long been a gap in the U.S. economy between the needs of employers and the skills and aspirations of available workers. While the pandemic has eased, the gap has grown even larger as employers face the challenge of getting people back to work, only to discover that the jobs they need are no longer the same, and workers, for their part, have discovered that they often don’t want to return to the same jobs—or even the same careers. In today’s episode, Lisa Strahs-Lorenc, the owner of Let Go Career Compass, will talk about how people can navigate this unsettling landscape to their next career journey. From early on in her own career, Lisa, herself, experienced the frustration of getting little professional guidance, as she pursued a path in early childhood education, only to find that it was a shrinking field with few job prospects. Having spent more than 25 years in workforce development in the business, nonprofit and education sectors, Lisa offers a broad and insightful perspective on how people can use their unique skills and interests to help create the best version of themselves for today’s job market—and for jobs in the future, which may look very different. She offers several signature interactive workshops, such as “The Road Less Traveled,” and “How Do You Stand Out?” that lead people to a better understanding of their career goals and personality traits related to the career paths they might select. Whether she’s working with students, or unemployed workers, seasoned professionals or those looking to use their transferable skills to explore new passions or careers, Lisa’s motto is “Do what you love, and you will love what you do.”