Beyond Bitchy: Mastering the Art of Boundaries

#90 - 7 Ways to Stop Unproductive & Harmful Thinking


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How do you stop or change thoughts that harm you? This time of uncertainty, vocational insecurity, job loss, and other upheavals is the perfect opportunity to explore being more aware of our thinking, and how our thoughts impact our emotions (and our lives). Let's talk about seven ways you can turn around unproductive or harmful thoughts.

Biggest Takeaways From Episode #90:

  • Even in the best of times, our thoughts are usually our worst enemy. Your thoughts create your emotions, and negative thoughts damage your confidence. In other words, our thoughts profoundly influence every area of our lives.
  • Examples of harmful thoughts include replaying a small incident over and over in your mind, getting over-involved in what other people are doing, or thoughts that you're inadequate or less-than.
  • One of the best ways to stop unproductive and painful thinking is simply to divert your thoughts. Another option is to connect with your senses. 
  • Most of us are masters at finding evidence to support our negative thoughts. Try turning this around and finding evidence of what you want to experience more of.
  • Stop hanging out with people who are negative, or who damage your confidence. Another strategy is to write down all of your hurtful, unproductive, or toxic thoughts.

Highlights from Episode #90:

  • Welcome to Episode 90! Vicki shares her wishes for listeners, and makes an announcement about her upcoming free live call about how the pandemic is giving us all a masterclass on boundaries. Click here to sign up! [00:39]
  • Vicki dives into today's topic: how to stop unproductive and harmful thinking. [02:31]
  • Thoughts happen to us; we don't choose them. Vicki shares a simple question to prove this point, and talks about the role of thoughts in our mood. [05:51]
  • What are unproductive thoughts? Vicki gives some examples to clarify. [13:44]
  • Vicki starts talking about solutions, and shares seven ways to stop unproductive and painful thinking. [20:08]
  • We hear about Byron Katie and her powerful process called The Work. [28:04]

Links and Resources:

  • Vicki Tidwell Palmer
  • Moving Beyond Betrayal by Vicki Tidwell Palmer
  • 5-Step Boundary Solution Clarifier
  • Vicki Tidwell Palmer on Instagram
  • Pia Mellody
  • How a Global Pandemic is Giving Us a Masterclass on Boundaries. Free Live Call with Vicki May 13, 2020. Click here to sign up.
  • Beyond Bitchy Podcast | Episode #43: Increase Your Confidence With These 5 Boundaries
  • Byron Katie, The Work
...more
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Beyond Bitchy: Mastering the Art of BoundariesBy Victoria Priya, LCSW (formerly Vicki Tidwell Palmer)

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