The Actionboyz have breached the paywall.

Actionboyz: Unlocked & Loaded is coming.

ActionBoyz: Unlocked &amp; Loaded Jon Gabrus, Ben Rodgers and Ryan Stanger (AKA the Action Boyz) are sharing some classic Actionboyz episodes, previously only available to Patreon subscribers. Share this feed with your friends who need convincing before they commit five dollars a month for hours of laughter and parasocial entertainment.&nbsp; And maybe this feed will also feature new episodes down the line &lt;extreme sly stallone voice&gt; Who Knows?

TV & Film

Comedy

Film Reviews

The boyz discuss Planet of the Apes (1968)

Planet of the Apes (1968)

The Lawnmower Man (1992)

Excited and anxious I await my dream

To escape, applaud And embrace my team

Opening day I always can trust

It’s just for this high That I crazily lust

Return of our hero Does brighten the days

Just briefly, my troubles Get lost in the haze

The grace from the field Arouses the crowd

Reflects on the days When I was quite proud

I’m more entranced Than the average fan

I used to play, you see And I know I still can

That time I drove the ball With such loft

My exit atop shoulders As they carried me off

This pastime and I Just fade into one

Expanded upon From father and son

My boy is young And awkward for now

I just need the time And can show him how

I really am quite close Just a break away

From straightening things out And being okay

I can help my team To regain its glory

With just a little twist To the same old story

Players say now They play for themselves

This causes a burning Within me that dwells

The fan is the one Who pays for the game

Which bestows all the riches And welcomed fame

The players will listen But really don’t hear

All the while just hiding Behind an invisible tear

I grow tired now of all this greed

And chart a course to set things free

-Gil Renard

(THE FAN)

The Fan (1996)

Ok ABZ Boyz and Girlz it's RONIN this week. What a goddamn treat! De Niro is fucking bringing it - was Stanger able to get past him not being sexy enough in this one? Will anybody be able to understand what the fuck Stanger's issue is with De Niro's sexiness? Well, sexiness aside this movie is a winner with an all-star cast, world class stunts and big boy car chases. The prefect movie to launch a series of remotely recorded episodes. Are there some bugs to still be worked out? Sure. Is there more talking over each other than ever? Maybe. But will this episode change the fucking world? You betcha. Remember ActionBabyz, even if the Boyz aren't in the same location to record, Val Verde is where ever you hang your gape gloves.

Ronin (1998)

Y'all better listen to this episode quick cause the Action Boyz are UNDER SIEGE and they, "got pies in the oven."  Also, did you know the 'Boyz are Cajun? Don't worry, it's of no consequence and it'll never come up again. Bottom line, the only thing standing between national security and Gary Busey in drag and Tommy Lee Jones doing Two-Face, is a cook. Good thing this cook is an ex-seal, with no muscle tone, who will strip down to a tank-top first chance he gets. Did we mention he's just a cook?

Actionboyz: Unlocked & Loaded is coming.

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