The deepest wounds aren’t always physical. 

Cliff Bauman was stationed near the Pentagon on September 11, 2001, and was among those who raced into the smoke and fire to help in the aftermath of the attacks. But while the country began to rebuild, Cliff’s inner world began to unravel. Haunted by what he’d seen—and what he couldn’t forget—he carried trauma silently, spiraling into guilt, depression, and isolation.

This powerful episode of Alive Again explores how reminders of 9/11 became emotional landmines: from anniversary headlines to sleepless nights and heavy drinking. Cliff opens up about the burden of hiding his pain, and the suicide attempt that nearly ended his life. 

Today, Cliff wears the label of "suicide survivor" with pride—not as a mark of shame, but as a badge of courage. His story is a raw and redemptive reminder that vulnerability can be a lifeline, and that choosing to live—even in the face of despair—is its own kind of bravery.

Story producer: Brent Dey

If you are a veteran dealing with depression or suicidal ideation, Cliff encourages you to check out the Veterans Trash Talk podcast for support. We also encourage contacting the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK. 

* If you have a transformative near-death experience to share, we’d love to hear your story. Please email us at [email protected] 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What if death isn’t an ending—but a sacred transition? In this deeply moving episode of Alive Again, we sit down with Dr. Sarah Kerr, a death doula, ritual healing practitioner, and founder of The Centre for Sacred Deathcare. With a PhD in Transformative Learning and decades immersed in cross-cultural and Indigenous traditions, Sarah helps individuals and families navigate dying and grieving as spiritual rites of passage.

She guides us through the concept of liminality—the space between worlds, where the old self dissolves and something new begins. Drawing parallels to the Hero’s Journey, Sarah reframes illness, trauma, and loss as initiatory paths, calling us to grow into the version of ourselves these afflictions ask us to become.

Her insights challenge the limits of the "Western box"—a worldview that often dismisses the unseen and the intuitive. Instead, Sarah invites us to listen deeply to our "spiritual DNA" and honor the inner guidance that emerges in life’s most tender transitions. As she puts it, "the purpose of death is the release of love."

This conversation resonates with many of our guests—from Eric Larsen to Anne Bayford—who recognize that their greatest trials became the soil for transformation. Dr. Kerr reminds us that healing is not about erasing pain, but integrating it, cooperating with the unavoidable, and finding grace in the mystery.

Produced by Dan Bush

For more about Dr. Kerr and her work, visit https://sacreddeathcare.com/

* If you have a transformative near-death experience to share, we’d love to hear your story. Please email us at [email protected] 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

On August 3rd, 2008, U.S. Air Force Staff Sergeant Nick Bradley’s life changed forever when a 20-pound IED detonated under his Land Cruiser during a mission in Afghanistan. Thrown from the vehicle and blinded by the blast, Nick awoke in a ditch, unable to move. “I was helpless,” he recalls. “I didn’t know what was going on—or if I was going to make it out of there.”

In this deeply human and unflinchingly honest episode of Alive Again, Nick walks us through the aftermath: a shattered body held together by 14 plates and 20 screws, the surreal detail of his nose being duct-taped back on in the field, and the long, painful road through coma, surgeries, and emotional reckoning.

But this is also a story of profound transformation. 

Every year, Nick honors his fallen comrade on his "Alive Day", a testament to the transformative power of shared humanity and the enduring spirit of resilience in the face of the unthinkable. 

This episode is a testament to the fragile threads that tether us to life, the brotherhood forged in battle, and the courage it takes to keep going.

His story reminds us that life is scary, and "that’s okay". 

Story Producer: Dan Bush

* If you have a transformative near-death experience to share, we’d love to hear your story. Please email us at [email protected] 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What happens when the journey to giving life nearly ends your own?

For years, Dorie Nolt faced the quiet heartbreak of unexplained infertility, finally celebrating a miraculous pregnancy after a long, arduous wait. But the joy of childbirth quickly transformed into a terrifying fight for survival when, after a routine C-section, Dorie's body began to unravel. Faced with escalating pain, a worsening fever, and doctors who dismissed her concerns and even blamed her, Dorie found herself navigating a medical system that seemed determined to ignore her.

In this powerful episode of Alive Again, Dorie shares the harrowing details of her near-fatal postpartum ordeal. Her story exposes a startling truth: that "women are ignored by medical professionals, but also women ignore themselves". Despite being on the brink of death and desperately fighting to return to her newborn son and husband, Dorie's experience became a profound lesson in self-advocacy and a stark reminder of the systemic failures in maternal healthcare. This is a raw and urgent narrative of resilience, highlighting the vital importance of listening to your own body and fighting for your life, even when no one else is.

Story Producer: Kate Sweeney

* If you have a transformative near-death experience to share, we’d love to hear your story. Please email us at [email protected] 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Rune Kolbeck found his truest self in the quiet expanse of nature, spending an idyllic youth roaming the Midwest's cornfields and timbers. But when he moved to Anchorage, Alaska, seeking a new home in the wilderness, he found himself in an unexpected nightmare. Within weeks of settling into the "big city," a casual run in a public park turned terrifying as he stared down the barrel of a gun. He recounts how he "kept being surprised that I wasn't dead yet".

In this haunting episode of Alive Again, Rune takes us through the surreal moments of his near-death encounter, battling confusion and fear as he stood face-to-face with an unknown assailant. He shares the chilling revelation that followed: learning from a newspaper article that the man who had spared his life was, in fact, a serial killer operating on the very trail system where Rune had been. 

Rune’s story isn’t about a heroic escape or a tidy conclusion; instead, it's a raw exploration of living with enduring psychological impact and unresolved trauma that has changed who he is. He speaks candidly about the burden of a story that doesn't fit the typical hero's journey, acknowledging his own imperfections. He shares his experience as a testament to those who find themselves “in the middle"—not heroes, not villains, just survivors wrestling with a reality that offers no neat ending. His powerful narrative reminds us that not all brushes with death lead to immediate clarity; some leave us grappling with the profound, unsettling truth that life doesn't always provide the resolution we seek, but that sharing these stories can help others realize they're not alone.

* If you have a transformative near-death experience to share, we’d love to hear your story. Please email us at [email protected] 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What prepares someone to survive the unthinkable? For renowned polar explorer Eric Larsen, it wasn’t hope or heroism—it was hardship. From the punishing silence of the Arctic to the staggering indifference of a cancer diagnosis, Eric’s life has been shaped by brutal extremes.

In this profound episode of Alive Again, Eric shares how the mindset forged in the most hostile places on Earth—enduring one step at a time, reframing suffering as growth, and confronting fear without flinching—became his unexpected survival guide through cancer.

With striking honesty and humility, Eric reflects on how the same resilience that drove him across frozen continents helped him face mortality, and how—despite the emptiness he encountered—he discovered something deeply human: that compassion is the connective tissue between life and death.

This is not just a survival story. It’s a testament to the human spirit, a meditation on suffering, and a powerful reminder that even at the edge of the world, we are never truly alone.

Story Producer: Dan Bush

To learn more about Eric and his work, go to ericlarsenexplore.com

* If you have a transformative near-death experience to share, we’d love to hear your story. Please email us at [email protected] 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

His miraculous survival story became the subject of Danny Boyle’s film 127 Hours—but what happened inside Aron’s mind and spirit during that ordeal is even more profound. 

In 2003, Aron Ralston was trapped alone in a remote Utah canyon for nearly six days with his right arm pinned beneath an 800-pound boulder. In this episode of Alive Again, the man who cut off his own arm to live shares the transformation that made him more whole than ever before. 

Aron recounts the vision that gave him the courage to survive, the moment he saw his future son, and the paradox of how intense suffering gave birth to overwhelming gratitude. As his body teetered on the edge of death, his consciousness expanded beyond it, leading to a radical reordering of what it means to be alive. This is not just a story of survival; it’s a story of spiritual awakening.

Story Producer: Dan Bush

For more about Aron’s adventures and advocacy,  go to www.aronralstonspeaker.com

* If you have a transformative near-death experience to share, we’d love to hear your story. Please email us at [email protected] 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When Delaney Tarr survived the shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in 2018, her life split in two. One part became instantly visible: the fiery, articulate youth activist who co-founded March for Our Lives and stood on national stages demanding change. The other part—quieter, more complicated—was still inside the girl who had to hide in a closet and text her parents goodbye while her classmates were being murdered.

In this raw and fiercely poetic episode of Alive Again, Delaney recounts her experience in two acts: a spellbinding live performance at Write Club Atlanta, followed by an intimate studio conversation. With striking metaphors—like the lifecycle of a fig or the stench of rotting flowers—Delaney reflects on trauma, identity, media scrutiny, and the strange burden of becoming a symbol before she had time to grieve.

And just weeks after recording this, Delaney’s younger sister survived a school shooting of her own, echoing the tragedy that upended Delaney’s life nearly seven years earlier. The cycle continues. But so does Delaney.

This is not just a story about surviving a mass shooting—it's about the rot that remains, the uncomfortable beauty in grief, and what it means to carry a cause through years of transformation.

Story producer: Nicholas Tecosky

Learn More:
Delaney is a freelance writer, reporter, and photographer based in Atlanta, GA. You can explore her work and advocacy at delaneytarr.wordpress.com

You can follow Delaney on Instagram and X: @delaneytarr

To find out more about March for Our Lives and to support the movement: marchforourlives.com

* If you have a transformative near-death experience to share, we’d love to hear your story. Please email us at [email protected]

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

“I didn’t feel the van hit me. But I remember the voice. And then I was somewhere else.”

When Anne Bayford was struck by a van while crossing a London street, her body was left broken—but her spirit was transported into a realm of profound peace, radiant light, and unconditional love. In this episode of Alive Again, Anne shares the extraordinary story of her near-death experiences and the many lifetimes of insight these brought her.

But her NDE was only one chapter of a much deeper journey.

Anne’s story weaves through a childhood marked by poverty, abuse, racism, and trauma—experiences that would later shape her calling as a counselor, psychic medium, and trauma-informed healer. We talk about soul blueprints, the illusion of reality, and how near-death experiences can strip away ego and illusion to reveal something larger: empathy, purpose, and connection. Anne’s powerful wisdom—grounded in both personal survival and deep spiritual exploration—offers a reminder that even the darkest moments can become portals to transformation.

Story producer: Dan Bush.

For more about Anne and her work, you can visit her website,  www.annebayford.com

Instagram:

Anne Bayford

YouTube channel

Anne Bayford

* If you have a transformative near-death experience to share, we’d love to hear your story. Please email us at [email protected] 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

He flatlined twice. What came back was a different man—and a different artist.

In 2008, artist and musician Rodney White survived a catastrophic car accident that left him in a coma, fighting for his life. He flatlined twice and underwent emergency surgery to piece his body back together. But what followed was an even deeper reconstruction of identity, purpose, and spirit.

In this intimate conversation, Rodney reflects on the surreal experience of waking from a coma, his struggle to reconcile memory loss with selfhood, and the mystical moments that guided his recovery—including a spiritual encounter that revealed the presence of his late father. He shares how his near-death experience reshaped his creativity, moving him beyond painting into clothing, poetry, and new forms of expression. We talk about the body as a vessel for spirit, the importance of protecting that spirit, and the challenge—and freedom—of rebuilding a life when the old one no longer fits.

This is a story about the invisible threads that connect past and present, art and healing, death and transformation. Rodney’s journey reminds us that sometimes we don’t go back to who we were… because we’re meant to become something more.

Story producer: Kate Sweeney.

Episode Cover Art by Rodney White.

To learn more about Rodney and his work, go to www.rodney-white.com

 

* If you have a transformative near-death experience to share, we’d love to hear your story. Please email us at [email protected] 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.