#tck #thirdculturekids #girlsboardingschool #boardingschoolsyndrome

1. What is a third culture kid (TCK)
2. I would love for you to share what drew you both to create this book about women's experiences boarding school and being Third Culture Kids?
3. Could you please speak to how many of the women missed their adopted homelands and how much this negatively impacted their impressions of the UK?
4. Could you please talk about the research for how children have a very sensory response to place which impacts how they respond to new geographies for the rest of their lives?
5. What was the sensory difference between their homes and boarding school?
6. In particular, we might like to chat about the following if that works for you:
7. Our stories – similarities and differences – both TCK – Nicky mercantile, Linda missionary. 
8. Writing a book about women’s experiences by women was important to us both. Less has been written about this and some of the books about women have had less traction in the media than those written by and about men. All but one of our participants identify as women. Being different is not safe at BS. Different ‘rules’ for men and women – binaries – impossible to ‘be’ otherwise.
9. Women in our book felt growing up in a BS was isolating and conformist – either just treated like a bloke in skirts (with no discussion of women’s bodily functions or needs, or, raised to be “young ladies” – Joy Schaverien’s comment on this is that men go to BS to learn to serve their country, while women are taught to serve men. 
10. Shame used as a tool of control – probably reinforced discomfort in our skin and shame about our bodies – constantly ‘on show’ and not it a good way. Eg headmaster who ‘supervised’ showers – female staff often not in positions of power and are also constrained/disadvantaged by patriarchal structures. 
11. Poisonous pedagogy – designed to break the child’s will – often early (first afternoon, first night, first meal) and public – so everyone saw the shame.

Nicky Moxey, an ex-boarder, originally spent 33 years as a project manager and Agile coach. She is retraining as an integrative counsellor and intends to work with boarding school survivors after she qualifies.

Linda Devereux is a third culture kid with more than 40 years of teaching experience in schools and universities. Linda is an Adjunct Research Fellow at Charles Sturt University, Australia, where she researches and publishes in the fields of transcultural childhoods, life narrative, boarding school, and the transition to university.

---

To buy the book: https://amzn.eu/d/1yXj4rn

 Or :https://www.routledge.com/Exploring-Boarding-School-Challenges-for-Women-and-Third-Culture-Kids-Worlds-Away-from-Home/Moxey-Devereux/p/book/9781032876313

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I draw upon the works of James O'Brien and David Cameron to explore how when David set out on his political journey he wanted to support families. 

Why then did he do the opposite and make huge welfare cuts and bring in the austerity measures. 

I look at the psychology of why this might be and draw upon Dr Gabor Mate and Nick Duffell to explore this. 

For the documentary Boarding on Insanity: https://www.boardingoninsanity.com/ For the Observer article: https://www.theguardian.com/education/2025/apr/20/breaking-our-spirits-was-the-plan-the-lifelong-impact-of-having-gone-to-boarding-school For the Mumsnet article: https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/5319413-lifelong-impact-of-going-to-boarding-school 

Take care, Piers 

#boardingoninsanity #davidcameron #drgabormate #austerity 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 #boardingoninsanity #boardingschoolsyndrome #emotionalintelligence #gabormaté #attachmenttheory 

Boarding On Insanity Relaunches On Saturday | National News Coverage Sunday 

To join the waiting list for the documentary: https://www.boardingoninsanity.com/ 

And to read the newspaper article from 20th April here: https://www.theguardian.com/theobserver/magazine 

Take care, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I talk about being the sibling, brother or sister of a boarding school survivor.

What might have been the impact on you of having your sibling being separated from you and put into a boarding school?

Here I explore some of the psychology of the breaking of attachment and the rupture that the siblings must have felt.

Beliefs along the lines of: "there must be something wrong with me" "I am not special" might arise in the psyche.

The boarder will not have been able to share their experiences and due to the perception that boarding schools are a privilege the child left at home might think there is something wrong with them. Why am I not privileged?

Some reflections and thoughts following a great question.

Take care,

Piers

#siblings #boardingschoolsurvivor #rupture #attachmenttheory

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

On the podcast today I am speaking with Dr. Bradley Nelson, veteran holistic physician and author of the bestselling book, "The Emotion Code," to discuss healing from trauma. He will share how to use energy healing practices such as The Emotion Code® and The Body Code® to identify and resolve emotional baggage that may be harming your health and relationships or otherwise holding you back in life.

Dr. Brad has trained and certified more than 12,000 Emotion Code practitioners in 80 countries, teaching them how to identify and release trapped emotions, unresolved feelings from traumatic and difficult experiences that harm health and relationships.

“Traumatic and difficult events from the past can leave us with unresolved emotional energy in the form of trapped emotions — negative energies that can literally become trapped within,” Dr. Brad says.

Learning to identify and release trapped emotions "can allow us to improve our health and relationships, move forward from negative experiences, and generally feel more freedom and happiness in our lives."

Some topics Dr. Brad can discuss that might be particularly appropriate for your show include:

• Overcoming Past Trauma With Future Medicine — When emotions are buried, they often resurface in the form of sadness, worry or physical discomfort. Dr. Brad shares how he helps people uncover emotional wounds and find lasting relief.

• Echoing Across Generations: How Emotions Can Be Inherited – Dr. Brad explains how people can inherit emotions from parents, grandparents, and – through DNA – even earlier generations.

• Is There a Wall Around Your Heart? – When people are deeply hurt, they often experience an inability to trust, give and receive love, and establish meaningful relationships. 

• The Emotional Roots of Sadness, Anxiety and Loneliness Loneliness raises the risk of stroke and heart disease and contributes to depression, anxiety, addiction, and other health problems, research indicates. 

• Energy Healing Breakthroughs Live — In live broadcasts, Dr. Brad demonstrates how people can experience dramatic relief from the emotional causes of discomfort and illness.

See some of Dr. Brad's recent media appearances here: https://drbradleynelson.onlinepresskit247.com/media-coverage.html

About Dr. Bradley Nelson: Veteran holistic physician Dr. Bradley Nelson (D.C., ret.) is one of the world’s foremost experts on natural methods of achieving wellness. He is the CEO of Discover Healing, author of the bestselling book, "The Emotion Code," and creator of the Emotion Code, the Body Code and the Belief Code. His latest book is “The Body Code: Unlocking Your Body's Ability to Heal Itself” (2023, St. Martin’s Press). For more information and a free Emotion Code Starter Kit, visit EmotionCodeGift.com (https://discoverhealing.com/the-emotion-code-starter-kit/)

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Last week a subscriber asked me about writing a book about my experiences of grief and death since the passing of my wife 6 weeks ago.

So today I wanted to share a few reflections about what I have learned since her death on 9th February 2025.

What have I learned?

What helps the grieving process?

What are the things that have helped me the most?

#grief #death #dying #crying #sadness

Take care,

Piers

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Today I share some reflections about how the launch for our new documentary about boarding school is going. 

We ask the question: "Are our leaders traumatised?" 

I also talk about my wife's funeral which took place on Monday. 

I really honour all her love, and support in getting the film out there and all that she gave me throughout our time together. 

To download the film and the extras: https://www.boardingoninsanity.com/ 

Take care, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 To join the webinars and to receive the recordings please visit here: https://www.boardingoninsanity.com/ 

The film is due for release on the 15th March at midday and will stay live for one week. 

#boardingoninsanity #boardingschoolsyndrome #childhoodtrauma #drgabormate

Take care,

Piers

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Thank you so much to everyone who came to the London premiere of the new documentary Boarding On Insanity. 

To register for the live webinars please put your name in here: https://www.boardingoninsanity.com/ 

Webinars are on 5th, 10th and 13th March. 

To join you will need to put your name on the email list and you will be sent the link to the webinar. 

These will be recorded so those on the email list will receive the recordings. 

Take care, Piers 

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I am speaking with psychotherapist, Toby Ingham, about his new book, A Guilty Victim. A Guilty Victim tells the true story of an English boy’s recovery from grooming and sexual abuse at a Catholic boarding school in Ireland in the 1970s. It is a contemporary account of psychotherapy with an adult survivor, written with the client’s full consent. A big thank you to Chris Bratich of Seen and Heard for connecting us.

---

Toby Ingham is a BPC & UKCP registered psychotherapist & supervisor, member of The British Psychotherapy Foundation, The Association of Independent Psychotherapists, and BAPPS. Former Clinical Director of South Bucks Counselling (2019-2023). He has 25 years of experience working with people, dealing with depression, low mood, anxiety states, trauma, bereavement, addictions, and emotional instability.  Before setting up his psychotherapy practice in Oxford, he trained in NHS at St Barts’ Hospital, and at the Homerton Hospital in London.  He is a former staff psychotherapist at Nightingale Hospital and trained at Promis Addiction Centre and Age Concern.

Questions for Toby:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. What lead you into the work you now do?
2. Could you please talk about your book, A Guilty Victim? What drew you to write it?
3. What do you feel is different about this book from other boarding school and therapeutic books?
4. What happened to your client at school? 
5. How did your client learn to cope? Do you feel that this process of coping is good for the psyche. If yes, why? If not, why not?
6. Why is it that we, as ex-boarders struggle to fit in outside of school? Both as children and as adults? (P.88)
7. And you mention that your client would try and take responsibility for the mood in the house? (P.88). Why do we do that as children?
8. Where there any specific symptoms of his trauma that showed up in adult life?
9. What do you feel makes the psychotherapeutic relationship so important in healing boarding school and childhood trauma wounds?
10. What changes did you see in your client as he moved through the therapeutic process with you?
11. What did you learn over the years that you worked with your client?
12. What do you feel about boarding schools?
13. How do people learn more about your work?

#childhoodtrauma#boardingschoolsyndrome#grooming#traumarecovery

To find out more about Toby's work please visit: www.tobyingham.com

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/