An Evolving Man Podcast

In this short solo episode, I reflect on one of the deepest impacts of boarding school:

The loss of identity.

What happens when children learn that their name, hobbies, feelings and individuality are not safe?

Drawing on my recent conversation with Peter Sykes, I explore how institutional environments shape children into survival personalities — the complier, the rebel or the crushed child.

We also look at why many adults later struggle to know what they truly want, and how we can begin reconnecting with our authentic selves.

In This Episode:

•  Identity loss at boarding school 
•  Names, shame and conformity 
•  Strategic survival personalities 
•  Why authenticity gets buried 
•  How to reconnect with who you really are 
•  Journaling and healing practices 

A thoughtful and practical episode for anyone exploring boarding school trauma, identity and recovery.

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. 

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. 

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross 

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic 

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community 

Many blessings, 

Piers Cross 

http://piers-cross.com/ 

In episode 157 of An Evolving Man, I speak with Kimberly Isherwood and Joan Ginsberg from Public Child Protection Wales.

Together we explore one of the most urgent and difficult issues in modern society: how we genuinely protect children from harm.

Kimberly and Joan share why Public Child Protection Wales was founded, what they see happening on the ground in education and safeguarding, and why they believe many current systems are not adequately protecting children.

We discuss grooming, institutional abuse, safeguarding blind spots, disclosure, adult responsibility, and the cultural reluctance to speak honestly about the realities children can face.

We also touch on boarding schools, neglect, attachment, and why child protection must begin with better informed adults, not simply new policies on paper.

This is a sobering but deeply important conversation for parents, teachers, safeguarding professionals, and anyone who cares about children’s wellbeing.

This episode reflects the views and concerns of the guests based on their research, experience and campaigning work.

Timestamps

00:00 Introduction
 01:18 Why Public Child Protection Wales was founded
 06:14 Joan Ginsburg’s background in education
 10:12 Concerns about current practice in schools
 16:42 Why certain lesson content is being challenged
 22:05 Grooming and how it works
 27:18 Systems, institutions and blind spots
 31:25 What safeguarding should look like
 37:44 Why current training often falls short
 44:12 Boarding schools and social services
 50:08 Neglect, trauma and attachment
 54:45 Why people hesitate to speak up
 59:28 The need to normalise hard conversations
 01:04:10 What must change
 01:08:17 Where to support Public Child Protection Wales

Find out more

Public Child Protection Wales
 publicchildprotectionwales.org

Piers Cross
 piers-cross.com

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. 

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. 

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross 

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic 

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community 

Many blessings, 

Piers Cross 

http://piers-cross.com/ 

 To buy tickets for the Glastonbury screening on 18th April 6.30-9pm or to share it: https://www.tickettailor.com/events/goodwillinactiontopreventsuicidecio/2140155 

In this short video, I’m sharing some reflections and inviting you to a special screening of our documentary Boarding on Insanity on April 18th in Glastonbury.

This feels like a full-circle moment, as we return to the very retreat centre where part of the documentary was filmed.

This will be more than just a screening — it’s an opportunity to come together, reflect, and have an open conversation about boarding school, trauma, leadership, and the wider impact these experiences may have on society.

We’ll also explore questions such as:

•  How does childhood trauma shape leadership? 
•  What is the true impact of boarding school on emotional development? 
•  Why is neglect often overlooked, despite its profound effects? 
•  Can healing happen more effectively in groups? 

If you’re nearby or feel called to this conversation, I would love to see you there.

📍 Event Details

Date: April 18th
Location: Glastonbury
Doors open: 6:30pm
Screening starts: 7:00pm
Followed by: Group discussion and connection

Ticket link in description.

⏱️ Timestamps (6:40 total)

00:00 Introduction
 00:35 Documentary screening announcement (April 18th, Glastonbury)
 01:20 Returning to the retreat centre – full circle moment
 02:10 What the evening will include (screening + discussion)
 03:00 Boarding school, trauma and leadership reflections
 04:10 Neglect and its impact on child development
 05:10 The importance of group healing and connection
 06:00 Upcoming podcast conversations and closing invitation

🔍 In this video, I explore:

•  Boarding school trauma and its long-term impact 
•  The role of neglect in childhood development 
•  Leadership and unresolved trauma 
•  Why healing often happens in groups 
•  Creating spaces for open, honest conversation 

🎧 Also coming up on the podcast

•  Public Child Protection Wales 
•  Peter Sykes 
•  Helen Odell-Miller 

🔗 Connect with me

Piers Cross
 Founder, Compassionate Leaders Global
 Leadership Coach | Speaker | Podcast Host

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. 

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. 

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross 

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic 

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community 

Many blessings, 

Piers Cross 

http://piers-cross.com/ 

In Episode 156 of An Evolving Man, I speak with Christopher J. Wesley — artist, speaker, and emotional leadership thinker — about trauma, identity, and emotional truth in a world shaped by pressure, performance, and algorithms.

Christopher shares his powerful journey from early childhood abuse to rebuilding his identity through grief, creativity, and self-awareness.

We explore how trauma shapes the way we see ourselves, why many leaders are disconnected from their emotional world, and how reconnecting with feeling can transform both life and leadership.

This episode also introduces Christopher’s FRAME Method — a practical approach to integrating emotion and logic in decision-making.

A deeply human conversation about healing, resilience, and what it means to live with authenticity.

---

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. 

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. 

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross 

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic 

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community 

Many blessings, 

Piers Cross 

http://piers-cross.com/ 

In this episode of An Evolving Man, I explore the concept of the outer critic — a key pattern in trauma, CPTSD, and boarding school syndrome.

Drawing on the work of Pete Walker, we look at how unresolved emotional pain can turn outward, shaping how we judge, mistrust, and distance ourselves from others.

While the inner critic attacks the self, the outer critic targets others — often silently and unconsciously.

This episode explores how this pattern develops, how it shows up in relationships and everyday life, and most importantly, how we begin to work with it.

We also explore practical tools including mindfulness, somatic awareness, grieving, and vision-based practices to help regulate the nervous system and reduce the intensity of these patterns.

A grounded and honest reflection for anyone navigating trauma, leadership, or emotional healing.

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. 

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. 

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross 

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic 

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community 

Many blessings, 

Piers Cross 

http://piers-cross.com/ 

In this episode of An Evolving Man, I’m joined by Deri Llewellyn-Davies — boardroom strategist, creator of the Ultra States framework, and someone deeply immersed in the worlds of performance, pressure, recovery, and leadership.

Deri has worked with hundreds of boards and has also pushed himself through extreme endurance events, giving him a rare perspective on what prolonged pressure does to the human system — not only at work, but in relationships, family life, and identity.

Together we explore the physiology of stress, the science of flow state, why so many leaders become trapped in chronic control, and what it really takes to recover well.

We also look at purpose, regret, emotional intelligence, and why connection may be one of the most overlooked ingredients in sustainable leadership.

We discuss:

•  The cost of sustained pressure on body, mind, and relationships 
•  Why many leaders live in chronic stress states 
•  The science and experience of flow state 
•  Recovery, dopamine, burnout, and rebooting the nervous system 
•  Deri’s reflections on his father’s regret and how that shaped his life 
•  The importance of purpose in work and life 
•  Emotional intelligence and the future of leadership in an AI age 
•  Why connection may be one of the most important human states 

This is a powerful conversation for leaders, founders, coaches, and anyone wanting to perform well without losing themselves in the process.

Suggested timestamps

00:00 Introduction
01:10 Deri’s path into strategy and performance
04:10 Strategy, instinct, and synchronicity
07:10 Control, masculinity, and pressure
11:10 Why command-and-control leadership is breaking down
18:35 What flow state really is
24:25 Stress, neurochemistry, and being hijacked
29:00 Burnout, recovery, and the need to stop
34:00 Resetting: nature, fasting, and deep recovery
39:10 Regret, fatherhood, and purpose
44:00 Finding your purpose
49:00 Emotional intelligence and AI
54:15 The future of leadership
57:10 Ultra Connect and human connection
59:35 Closing thoughts

For more info: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thestrategyman/ 

Or: https://ultra-states.com 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. 

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. 

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross 

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic 

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community 

Many blessings, 

Piers Cross 

http://piers-cross.com/ 

 Over the years I have noticed a common ailment among ex-boarders. 

And that is stomach issues. 

Why is that? 

And what can we do now? 

#digestion #trauma #boardingschoolsyndrome 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. 

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. 

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross 

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic 

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community 

Many blessings, 

Piers Cross 

http://piers-cross.com/ 

Prince Andrew, Epstein, and boarding school trauma — exploring the psychology behind early experiences and adult behaviour.

In this episode, I explore the psychological patterns that may sit beneath well-known public narratives.

Looking at Prince Andrew, Sarah Ferguson, and Ghislaine Maxwell, I reflect on their early childhood experiences — including boarding school and family dynamics — and how these environments may shape emotional development, behaviour, and relationships later in life.

Drawing on trauma research, attachment theory, and Polyvagal Theory, this episode explores:

• The long-term impact of boarding school and early separation
 • Emotional suppression as a survival strategy
 • The link between childhood trauma and adult behaviour
 • How the nervous system influences trust and perception
 • The concept of “wounded leadership”

This is not about judgement.

It is about understanding how early experiences can shape the way people relate to themselves, others, and the world.

At a broader level, this conversation raises important questions about leadership, emotional intelligence, and the environments we create for children.

If this episode resonates, feel free to share your reflections or pass it on to someone who may find it meaningful.

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. 

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. 

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross 

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic 

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community 

Many blessings, 

Piers Cross 

http://piers-cross.com/ 

In this episode of An Evolving Man, I speak with Dawn Stallwood — corporate and commercial lawyer turned leadership counsel, chief integrity officer, entrepreneur, and author of Beautiful Leadership.

Dawn brings nearly three decades of experience advising boards, founders and senior leaders, and in this conversation we explore what it really means to lead with integrity, empathy, humility and courage in times of pressure, uncertainty and change.

We speak about:

• the difference between command-and-control leadership and human-centred leadership
• why so many leaders have never been properly trained
• the importance of self-awareness, transparency and emotional intelligence
• how to build capacity rather than simply drive harder
• what pressure reveals in leaders
• why AI will make human leadership skills even more important
• how leaders can create cultures people genuinely want to be part of

Dawn also shares the framework behind her book Beautiful Leadership, including the inner qualities and outer practices that help leaders become more transformative, trustworthy and effective.

This is a thoughtful and practical conversation for anyone interested in leadership, culture, ethics, governance, emotional intelligence, and the future of work.

Find out more about Dawn and her book at https://thebeautifulleader.com/

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. 

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. 

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross 

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic 

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community 

Many blessings, 

Piers Cross 

http://piers-cross.com/ 

 For the leaders' workshop about dealing with pressure: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/leadership-under-pressure-how-you-can-manage-pressure-better-tickets-1982772564114?utm-campaign=social&utm-content=attendeeshare&utm-medium=discovery&utm-term=listing&utm-source=cp&aff=ebdsshcopyurl 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. 

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. 

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross 

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic 

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community 

Many blessings, 

Piers Cross 

http://piers-cross.com/