Today I am speaking with Michael Boyle on the 30th episode of my podcast.

Michael is one of the founders of men's work in the UK having been central to inviting over Robert Bly and Robert Moore, author of King Warrior Magician Lover in the 1990s. He was also central to setting up the Mankind Project, MKP in the UK. He was also central to setting up the Mankind Project, MKP in the UK which is a global charity that runs rites of passage weekends. 
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Michael Boyle founded and directed a successful commercial enterprise before making a mid-life transition into the world of myth and archetypal psychology. He has an MA in Psychotherapy and for over 20 years has worked extensively as a facilitator and presenter on corporate leadership programmes throughout the world. He enhances his archetypal work through extensive training and experience in Group Facilitation, Shadow Work and Systemic Constellations. He regards the Archetypal approach as key to stimulating the necessary self-awareness that facilitates sustained behaviour change. Michael is a founding Partner and Senior Programme Director of Olivier Mythodrama and lives in London in the UK.

Michael is also the Founder of Abandofbrothers, a charity providing rites of passage experiences and local male mentors for disaffected young men. He is also a certified Leader and Leader Trainer for the ManKind Project, a global men’s network, and leads “The Adventure,” an initiatory experience for men, internationally. Michael’s most recent project, Breaking the Spell, is specifically designed to support men and women to liberate themselves from restricting personal and cultural conditioning. 

Questions for Michael:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey – what sparked your mid-life transition into men's work and the Mythopoetic tradition? What have you learned along the way?

2. What are some of your stories and teachings from Robert Bly?
3. I would love for you to speak about rites of passage and initiation. What is the importance of community?
4. I would love for you to speak more about purpose and the archetypes? Would you be able to go into more depth about the power of the archetypal work and the extended framework that you now use?
5. I would love you to speak about Sovereign purpose. What is meant by this? How do we connect with this?
6. I would love for you to talk more about the belief that “people do not so much “grow” as evolve into more fulfilled versions of who they really are.”
7. “The more you develop yourself as a person the more qualified you are for leadership.” Would share some of the wisdom you have learned over the past 30 years about leadership? What some of the key qualities of a great leader? How do we cultivate them? Would you say that our current leaders are in that category? If not, how do we help them or the system to change?
8. What is your vision for the future? How do we go through this rite of passage and come out the other side?

 For the Sovereign Purpose retreat: https://ww

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I am speaking to the author, Michael Maisey, on my podcast. Michael is an amazing man and has a truly astonishing story. From sexual abuse, violence, drug and alcohol addiction, attempted suicide and being arrested as a teenager for armed robbery and attempted murder Michael spent several years in prison.

On leaving prison Michael continued struggled with alcohol and drug addiction. At age 25 through the support of the AA and the 12 Step Program he gave up alcohol and drugs. He set up a thriving business in real estate and now teaches others through workshops and talks how to transform their lives.

He has been given awards for his work and has appeared as a contestant on Channel Four's show with Ant Middleton, SAS, Who Dares Win, Season 4.

Today we talk about his journey and the tools he has used to transform his life and those of thousands of others. He talks about what it is to be a man, how to transform even the most horrific abuse and how we support the young people who are struggling with crime and addictions.

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Michael is the Author of the Best-Selling Book 'Young Offender'. He has been sober for 14 years and since his release from prison in 2001 he has been on a journey practicing healing and self-development on himself to improve his life and heal the wounds from his own childhood. He went from a child from an underprivileged background, with zero qualifications to being in a position to retire at the age of 35. 

He works with all the tools which he has found to be most beneficial. He brings these tools together to help others reach their full potential and help them to step up and let their own light shine. His core belief is about 100% accountability, giving back, and transforming the lives of others from all walks of life.​

Some questions for Michael:

1. I would love for you to share some of your incredible journey. What was the path that led you to do the work that you now do with men, women and teenagers?
2. Importance of role models: Looking back at your own life, what do you feel is the importance of having benevolent older role models in your life, especially as a teenager? 
3. If your child is struggling:You mention the first time you are arrested the policeman coming to your house. And then the chief superintendent giving you a talking down when you were arrested for armed robbery. Their tactics didn't seem to work for you. What do you feel would have worked for you? And for those who have kids who are getting wayward what is the best way of talking to them?
4. Giving up addictions: How important was the support of the 12-step program and your sponsors of Sean, and Matt. What else could you share about the journey of healing your addictions?
5. What do you feel needs to happen in prison to rehabilitate people? How do we change the current system?
6. How do people find out more about your work?

#michaelmaisey #youngoffender #overcomingaddictions

To find out more about Michael's w

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

AEM Podcast #28 Ulf Sandstrom - Techniques for Healing Trauma

Today I am speaking with Ulf Sandstrom on my podcast. Ulf is a fascinating man who co-founded the charity Peaceful Heart Network which goes to areas of conflict and natural disasters to help heal emotional and mental trauma.

The main tool that they use is the Trauma Tapping Technique which is based on the work of Thought Field Therapy (TFT) and Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT).

They have worked with 1000s of people and have had transformative results working with child soldiers, victims of rape, violence and orphans of different wars.

Ulf also teaches and leads us through one of the techniques.

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Ulf Sandstrom is a Swedish trauma facilitator, working to ease suffering and prevent violence by spreading methods for trauma relief and resilience to stress. Together with Gunilla Hamne he is a co-founder of the Peaceful Heart Network, a non-profit active in over 30 countries in areas where conflict and natural disasters have left people vulnerable and hyper vigilant. 

They have received the ACEP humanitarian award for their work, developed the Trauma Tapping Technique, conducted studies on the effects of it on children liberated from armed forces in DR Congo, and developed free tools like the app Self Help For Trauma in 27 languages. 

Ulf works with individuals and teams looking to regain control of life and to develop organic self-leadership skills combining Trauma Tapping and with Havening Techniques, Neurolinguistic Programming, hypnosis, Clean Language and Mental Training.

Questions for Ulf:

1. I would love you to share a little more about how you started working in the area you now do as a trauma facilitator?
2. Would you be able to share a little bit about trauma and especially emotional and mental trauma? Why is it so important to heal these traumas? What in your opinion is the impact when trauma is not dealt with?
3. I would love you to share some of your stories of working in war-torn places. Was there a conscious decision to go to Africa in the first place? Or were you asked? 
4. How receptive were people at the beginning when learning the tools like Trauma Tapping Technique? Were there methods that you used to help people to be more receptive to these techniques?
5. What was the impact of using these tools? How long did it take for you and Gunilla to realise that these tools were really helping and having a really positive impact in the communities?
6. Would you be able to share some of the studies you conducted showing how EFT and Tapping and some of the other tools help others? Or some case studies from your own work?
7. Would you be happy to share some of the techniques with us?
8. A lot of my audience are ex-boarders having been sent away from home at a young age. Some have received bullying or other forms of abuse. Having worked with severe trauma what would your message be to someone who has been affected by childhood trauma? In your opinion is it possible to heal?

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

An Evolving Man (AEM) #27   Rod Boothroyd   Magician Archetype   Trickster Safety Officer

Rod Boothroyd is a counsellor, psychotherapist, a certified “Healing The Shadow” practitioner and the author of the book Warrior, Magician, Lover, King – a guide to the male archetypes updated for the 21st century.

Today on the podcast I am welcoming back Rod Boothroyd to go deeper into the archetype of the Magician. 

The Magician is the part of us that is responsible for thinking, for analysing and for planning things out. The Magician is the part of us responsible for the mental side of our lives. 

Today Rod explores deeper into the subject of the Magician. What are the positive aspects and what are the shadows? How do we connect to this energy in a benevolent way? 

He works with men, women and mixed groups to heal the wounds of childhood with Marianne Hill and also trains people in the art of working with the shadow and healing emotional wounds.

Some of the questions that Rod answers are: 

1. What is the Magician archetype?
2. What makes a balanced and mature Magician?
3. What are the shadows of the archetypes?
4. What are the specific shadows of the Magician archetype?
5. I would love you to speak more about the Safety Officer. What is this aspect and how does it show up in our lives?
6. What would you say is the key emotion of the Magician and why does it help to face this emotion?
7. What about the trickster? In some cultures the Trickster is seen as a gift. Is the Trickster only negative or does it have positive qualities?
8. I see that people who are in the Magician shadow often disassociate. What have you found has really helped people to come back into their bodies?
9. How do we cultivate the Magician - what are the steps that we can take to embody the Magician?
10. How do we find Sacred Time for the Magician? How important is this?
11. How to heal the Magician shadow
12. How to connect to your work? 

#kingwarriormagicianlover #magicianarchetype #rodboothroyd 

Books:

Rod Boothroyd: Warrior Magician Lover King; A Guide to the Male Archetypes Updated for the 21st Century

Josh Waitzkin: The Art of Learning

Bill Kauth: A Circle Of Men; The Original Manual For Men's Groups

Pete Walker: Complex PTSD

Robert Moore: The Archetype of Initiation

Training as a shadow work practitioner:

https://www.htsorganisation.co.uk

Group healing and self development work:

Men:

https://www.strongfreemen.co.uk

https://www.menwithoutmasks.com

https://www.thecipproject.com

https://mankindprojectuki.org/

h

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I am speaking with Dick Moore on my podcast. We talk about with the current mental health crisis in schools and with young people. We talk about suicide, self-harming and the pressure that young people are under. What can we do?

Dick Moore has worked as an English teacher, rugby coach, boarding school housemaster and, for over twenty years, the headmaster of a co-educational day and boarding school.

He has a passionate interest in adolescent development and emotional wellbeing. He qualified as a Youth Mental Health First Aid Instructor in 2012 and joined the Charlie Waller Trust in 2012. He has also attended an ASIST Suicide Intervention course.

Dick now travels the country giving talks to teachers, young people and parents to help raise awareness of mental health issues.

I  would like for you to talk further about some of the following subjects:

1. Can you share a little about your own journey? What drew you into doing the work that you now do regarding mental health?
2. I would be really interested to hear you speak about suicide and suicide ideation. Why is this such a problem at the moment especially with young people? And especially young males?
3. The pressure young people are under. Do you feel that young people are under more pressure now than in our day, especially after the last 2 years? Why is this? What can we as adults support them? What can young people do to manage and handle this pressure better? 
4. I would love for you to speak a little about mental health in boarding schools. In your opinion, is there more pressure in a boarding school environment than a day school? One of my friends committed suicide while I was at boarding school. I saw the amount of pressure the boy was under and the lack of support. Has this changed since our day at boarding school?
5. Could you speak a little on male and female emotional honesty please? Do you feel that this has developed over the years or not?
6. I would love you to speak on the whole area of discrimination - in all walks of life…families, schools, friendships, businesses, race, creed, gender etc. etc.
7. How do we better support the young people? Especially in boarding schools where the houseparents are often under so much pressure. Is there something that we can set up in schools? In your experience what do you feel would work?
8. How do people learn more about what you do or reach out to you?

#mentalhealth #mentalhealthchildren #boardingschool

For more information about Dick's work and to invite him to speak at your school please visit:https://www.dickmoore.org/

To find out more about the Charlie Waller Trust: https://charliewaller.org/

A PDF spreadsheet about mental health: https://docs.wixstatic.com/ugd/b5791d_58764f25

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

AEM Podcast #25 - Theuns Opperman - Headteacher Talks About Duty of Care, 'Breaking Children Down To Build Them Up' and Abuse in Boarding Schools 

Today I am speaking with Theuns Opperman who is a headteacher based in South Africa. 

He has been in teaching for 20 years and has worked in several boarding schools. 

Today we explore his take on why elite schools and especially boarding schools seem to put the institutions first rather than the children. 

He goes on to explore what we can start to do to change the system and stop the abuse and sexual grooming which goes on in some of these schools. 

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Theuns Opperman is a headteacher in South Africa. He set up the Teach! Conferences which support teacher development in 2012. He has been a teacher for over 20 years and has worked in boarding schools both as a teacher and on a senior level. He now works as a principal in a secondary school in Johannesburg.

Here are some of the questions that he answers: 

1. I would love for you to begin by sharing some of your own journey. What inspired you to get into teaching? What was the inspiration behind speaking up about some of the high profile suicide and sexual abuse cases in South Africa, especially in boarding schools?
2. Could you explain a little bit about Thomas Kruger please? What happened? W
3. Why, in your opinion, do schools cover up any negative press, especially around sexual abuse? Why is it that it is school first, children second? Has it changed?
4. You mention in your article that in some boarding schools they want to break the child down in order to build them up. I know from my boarding experience that this approach didn't work for me. What is your feeling about this? What should schools be doing instead?
5. Having worked in a boarding school do you feel that the load placed on the teachers and houseparents is too much? For this reason is this why they miss the abuse? What can be done? 
6. Many schools in South Africa and across the UK have had military style discipline. And most of the discipline has been meted out by the children. Does this work? 
7. What is the importance of having teachers that have emotional intelligence? How do they cultivate this?
8. What in your opinion are the “layers of experience in a boarding environment?” 
9. In your opinion as a headteacher how do we start to change the system? How do we make it so that it is children first, schools second? What needs to happen?

Some of Theuns' quotes:

 “If schools cannot meet the needs of the students that they serve, they need to stop existing.”

 “My theory is that - because of our romanticization of the suffering - we look past the real harm. We justify the bullying and dehumanisation as part of a process of growing up and “becoming a man”.”

To read his article on Duty of Care: https://theunsjan.blogspot.com/2021/10/my-only-story-and-our-duty-of-care.html#comment-form

For his blog: https://theunsjan.blogspot.com/

On N

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I am speaking with Laurence Johns from The ManKind Project, MKP. Laurence is the Development and Outreach Director at The ManKind Project UK and Ireland. The MKP is a men's charity that helps "to nurture a global community of men who have the strength of character to show love, support healthy relationships, and make the world a kinder place."

Some of the questions I ask him:

1. I'd love you to speak about some of your own fascinating journey. What drew you into men's work?
2. You work as the Development and Outreach Director at the MKP. Could you share more about the MKP's mission, what it does
3. I'd love you to speak about masculinity and both toxic masculinity and benevolent masculinity
4. I am fascinated by the power of community. You mention on your website that “the only real currency left, is community”. Can you speak more on this please?
5. In the work that you are doing with the Mankind project what is the current state of men's mental health? What have you found has really helped men with their mental health?
6. Could you speak about the power and importance of positive initiation please? Why is it so important and what happens to men when we don't have it in our lives?
7. I would love to honour Robert Bly who passed away 10 days ago. Are there any bits of wisdom from Robert that you could share? Any stories? Anything that you have learned?
8. How do people get in touch with you and learn more about the ManKind Project?

To learn more about the Mankind Project UK and Ireland please visit: https://mankindprojectuki.org/

To learn more about the Mankind Project globally: https://mankindproject.org/

For the female version, Women In Power please visit: https://womeninpoweruk.com/

Or Women Within: https://womanwithin.org.uk/

Or Celebration of Being which hosts gatherings for both men, women and mixed: https://www.celebrationofbeing.co.uk/

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. He also runs online men's groups, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. 

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1 

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross 
For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic 
For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community 

Many blessings, 

Piers Cross http://piers-cross.com/ 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I am delighted to be speaking with Rod Boothroyd again on An Evolving Man Podcast. 

Rod is speaking in more depth about the Warrior Archetype - what it is and some of the shadow aspects of it. He also talks about some of the ways to connect and cultivate the mature masculine archetype of the Warrior. 

For those who have been drawn to my work through boarding school syndrome then I recommend a listen to this series. 

Often at boarding school we were not taught what it was to be a man or woman. We were guided by other children so we became children in adult's bodies.

In the following podcast Rod outlines what it is to be in connection with the Warrior archetype. That part of us that acts, and has boundaries. What is it to be a mature adult? 

Some of the questions Rod answers are:

1. What is the Warrior archetype?
2. What makes a balanced and mature Warrior?
3. What are the shadows of Sadist and Masochist?
4. How do we cultivate the Warrior - what are the steps that we can take to embody the Warrior?
5. What happens when the warrior is (feels) defeated..
6.  How to keep the Warrior's abilities/'weapons' in the best shape for when they're needed; 
7.  How to effectively lead and support others to develop a stronger Warrior. 
8. Talk about the Immature forms of the Hero - what is the difference between the Hero and the Warrior. And what are the traits of the Grandstanding Bully and the Coward?
9. How to heal the Warrior shadow
10. Who are your Warrior heroes/ heroines?
11. Rod's interpretation of initiation and why ancient initiation was so brutal. 
12. How to connect to your work? 

Books:

Rod Boothroyd: Warrior Magician Lover King; A Guide to the Male Archetypes Updated for the 21st Century

Josh Waitzkin: The Art of Learning

Bill Kauth: A Circle Of Men; The Original Manual For Men's Groups

Pete Walker: Complex PTSD

Training as an emotional process work practitioner:

https://www.htsorganisation.co.uk

Group healing and self development work:

Men:

https://www.strongfreemen.co.uk

https://www.menwithoutmasks.com

https://mankindprojectuki.org/

https://illuman.org

Men and women:

https://www.celebrationofbeing.co.uk/

https://healingtheshadow.co.uk/

 #warriorarchetype #kingwarriormagicianlover #rodboothroyd --- 

Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. He also runs online men's groups, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today on my podcast I am delighted to be speaking with Craig White about transformation, brotherhood, and initiation.

Craig is both an international men's coach and an international rugby coach. Recently he coached Uruguay in the Rugby World Cup 2019 and today he shares some of the stories about how he helped to transform their team and "shock the world".

A really fascinating conversation about human potential from a man who has coached at the highest levels of sport with Leicester Tigers, London Wasps, and Bolton Wanderers, and on two Lions tours.

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Craig White has been fascinated by Human Behaviour and Performance for over 25 years. During this time he has served as a High-Performance Mentor, and as an Elite Sports Coach, having coached at International Level in Professional Rugby Union with Ireland, Wales and the Lions and in the football Premier League. He has also worked as a Life Coach, a Yoga and Meditation Teacher, and a Business Owner. He now focuses his time on running men's retreats, consulting for professional sports teams and working privately as a men's coach.

Areas that we talk about:
1. I would love you to share some of your journey. What drew you into the work you now do?
2. I would love you to speak about transformation and especially your own mid-life transformation. What do you advise others who are wanting to transform?
3. Brotherhood. What is the importance of brotherhood in this transformation process? I would love you to explore a little how you brought this idea into Uruguay national team in the Rugby World Cup.
4. I would love you to speak about the void. What is the relation between the void and change?
5. In my work I see that those who have been through trauma and especially boarding school often didn't have role models. Many didn't learn what it means to be benevolent man or woman. I would love you to speak on what you feel is a man in his fullness?
6. I would love to hear you perspective about the importance of initiation.
7. Mission and purpose. Can you speak to how we as men find our purpose and fulfil our mission in life?
8. How do people find out more about you and the work you do or to get in touch?
For more information please visit: https://www.menwithoutmasks.com/
https://www.craigwhitementoring.com/

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I speak with Nick Duffell who is one of the leading experts in the field of boarding school trauma about intimate relationships, disassciation and homesickness.

Nick Duffell is a psychotherapist and trainer in private practice who pioneered therapeutic work with ex-boarders and specialist training for psychotherapists. He is the author of The Making of Them, Trauma Abandonment and Privilege and Wounded Leaders.

Here are some of the questions I asked him:

1. I would love you to share your own journey of boarding school and what drew you into the work that you now do?

2. “How hard is it to believe even that boarding school harmed you? Because usually the ex boarders don't realize or accept what harm and trauma they suffered during boarding.”

3. I would love you to speak more about the Strategic Survival Personality. Do you feel that we as ex-boarders who were compliers have to become rebels in order to heal?

4. “please kindly speak on homesickness in detail. Because for me this experience was so extreme and dreadful. My hair turned grey at the age of 13. I missed my familiar environment so intensely.”

5. I went to a rural boarding school from age 11 to 18. An extremely isolated and traumatic experience where survival strategy meant I couldn't develop socially or emotionally and which left me utterly unprepared for real life. I feel like the pause button in my life was pressed for 7 years just so I could survive the experience. In many ways I still feel like that 11 year old. Completely lost and adrift. The loss of family, childhood and self is so huge it has shaped everything about me. How can we ever fix ourselves when we have missed out on such key developmental foundations? When we have neglected and lost ourselves so completely? One thing I realise is that we really did miss out on key things we needed..and also that we don't realise what we should have or be because we never had it.. 

6. Many of the ex-boarders I know really struggle in intimate relationships. What do you advise ex-boarders to help them to start to cultivate open, loving and happy relationships?

7. A common trait as ex-boarders seems to be around disassociation. What can we start to do to stop the splitting and connecting again with our feelings – both happy and sad?

8. How do we change the system and bring healing to boarding schools?

9. How do people find out more about your work and your offerings?

For more information please visit:

https://www.boardingschoolsurvivors.co.uk/

And for one of Nick's upcoming events: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/opus-study-day-boarding-school-and-society-tickets-159661599141

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems. He also runs online men's groups, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man. He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. 

To p

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/