Beyond The Surface

In this episode of Beyond the Surface, Matthias shares his courageous journey of navigating the intersection of faith and identity, growing up in a conservative religious environment while grappling with homophobia and his own sexuality. A pivotal moment helped him embrace his identity and begin deconstructing his faith. Matthias reflects on the challenges of reconciling being both queer and Christian, confronting traditional beliefs, and finding a deeper connection to God. His story offers hope and insight for those seeking to live authentically while healing from the wounds of religious rejection and rigid doctrines.

Who Is Matthais?

Matthias Roberts (he/him) is a queer psychotherapist and author of Holy Runaways: Rediscovering Faith after Being Burned by Religion and Beyond Shame: Creating a Healthy Sex Life on Your Own Terms. Formerly, he hosted the popular podcast Queerology which was dubbed by O: The Oprah Magazine as “one of the best LGBTQ+ podcasts.” Matthias holds two master’s degrees from The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology, one in Theology & Culture and one in Counselling Psychology.

Matthias’ work has been featured by Bustle, Woman’s Day, Sojourners, The Seattle Times, and many others. In his psychotherapy practice, Matthias specialises in helping people recover from religious and spiritual trauma so they might live confident and fulfilling lives.

Connect with Us

• You can find out more about Matthias via his website
• You can also connect over on Instagram - @matthiasroberts

• To connect with Sam on Instagram - @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.

In this episode of Beyond the Surface, we hear Megan’s powerful story of resilience and transformation as she navigates life after growing up in a fundamental, high-control evangelical environment. From the pressures of purity culture to the emotional toll of fear-based faith, Megan shares how she transitioned from conventional therapy to religious harm recovery. Through candid reflections on toxic relationships, faith-driven guilt, and post-traumatic growth, Megan’s journey highlights the importance of community, self-exploration, and reclaiming one’s identity after religious trauma.

Who Is Megan?

Megan is a Licensed Psychotherapist and Religious Harm Recovery Coach who was indoctrinated into fundamentalist evangelical christianity at an early age. Her work in the mental health field eventually helped her begin to make sense of her complicated family history and the way the patriarchal religious groups of her childhood supported harmful, authoritarian systems of control. She now draws from both her personal experience and professional expertise to help others recover from religious harm and reclaim their authentic selves.

Connect with Us

• You can find more about Megan's work on her website - https://meganvonfricken.com
• You can also connect on Instagram or Facebook
• To join Megan's group for religious harm recovery click here.

• To connect with Sam on Instagram - @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.

Join us in this enlightening episode of Beyond the Surface as we explore the multifaceted topic of religious trauma in Australia and New Zealand. Joined by Jane Kennedy and Elise Heerd, both therapists and we are all co-founders of the Religious Trauma Collective. Together, we discuss the significant launch of this collective, which aims to provide community, support, and understanding for individuals impacted by religious trauma. The collective is committed to building a registry of trauma-informed practitioners, offering support to those seeking help, and creating a resource hub that showcases local stories and memoirs.

Find Out More About Us

• Sam - website or Instagram.
• Jane - website or Instagram
• Elise - website or Instagram

The Religious Trauma Collective

• Visit our website - https://www.thereligioustraumacollective.com/
• If you are a practitioner working with religious trauma; why not join our registry?!
• We are also on Instagram & Facebook

Listen to our stories

• Sam - 'Me, Myself & I'
• Jane - 'The Sentimental Non-Believer'
• Elise - 'The Former Good Christian Girl'

Lynn, a direct descendant of Joseph Smith, she shares her journey of faith deconstruction that began in Utah after confronting troubling historical truths about her ancestor and the Book of Mormon. Lynn's path of navigating religious trauma, embracing uncertainty, and redefining her spiritual identity highlights the role of therapy and self-compassion in the process. We also explore the complexities of family dynamics when beliefs diverge, and the importance of fostering mutual respect and understanding amid religious transitions.

Who Is Lyn?

Lyn Smith Gregory grew up in Utah as one of nine children in a devout Mormon family. Her great, great uncle was Joseph Smith, founder of the Mormon Church. At 19, she left the Church and moved to New York City, eventually obtaining an MBA at NYU. After a 20-year career in the tech industry, she left to pursue writing full-time and has attended the Iowa Summer Writing Program and the Bread Loaf Writers’ Conference. She lives in Savannah with her husband.

Connect With Us

• You can connect with Lyn on Facebook, Instagram or LinkedIn
• Or reach out via her website

• To connect with Sam on Instagram - @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.

What happens when the church you trust becomes a source of fear and exclusion? In this episode of Beyond the Surface, we sit down with Kimberley, known as the exvangelical parent, to discuss her journey through conservative evangelicalism, growing up during the satanic panic and purity culture. Kimberley shares her struggles with undiagnosed OCD, vivid memories of being shown graphic depictions of hell, and navigating family dynamics shaped by political conservatism. From supporting her brother as he came out to navigating her own deconstruction as a parent, this is a story of fear, resilience, and finding peace beyond religious teachings.

Who Is Kimberly?

Kimberly, She/Her, is the founder of The Exvangelical Parent. She is a writer, artist, wife, and over-caffeinated mom. Enneagram 9. INFP. She is a queer, neurodivergent, hopeful agnostic who likes long walks in the forest and Zoloft. After spending over a decade in the ministry world, she now writes and creates full time. You can find her work on Scary Mommy, The Mighty, The Huffington Post, The Natural Parent, Parent Co, Her View From Home, and Columbia Mom.

Connect With Us

• You can connect with Kimberly on social media on both Facebook & Instagram
• You can find out more about The Exvangelical Parent via their website.

• To connect with Sam on Instagram - @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.

Join us for a powerful bonus episode of Beyond the Surface, where we unpack the complexities of purity culture in evangelical Christianity with returning guest Meg, a sexologist and relationship coach from New Zealand.

Together, we trace the historical roots of purity culture and its impact on modern sexual education and relationships, highlighting how it induces shame around sexual behaviours and affects intimacy in both heterosexual and LGBTQIA+ dynamics. Meg shares personal and professional insights, offering a fresh perspective on deconstructing these harmful ideologies to foster healthier relationships and personal well-being.

Who Is Meg?

Meg is a Sex and Relationship Coach specialising in helping people recovering from the shame-based religious teachings of purity culture and the deconstruction of their faith. She has trained in Clinical Sexology, Trauma Informed Care, is a Certified Advanced Sex and Relationship Coach and Integrated Intimacy Practitioner.

She supports people to explore personal agency and intimate connection.

Meg is also a Protect Accredited Trainer (New Zealand’s leading protection and self-defense agency). For more than 14 years she’s worked with clients to help them identify the behavioural and psychological signs of abuse and practical strategies for staying safe.

In all these areas her work focuses on the mind-body connections that help people recover from trauma and find freedom in their bodies.

As the creator of the couples guide to Hotter Sex in 10 days, and The Shame-free Sex Course she delivers empowering practical skills to people all around the world on these subjects.

Connect With Us

• You can reach Meg to explore sex and relationships post purity culture on her website
• You can also connect over on Instagram – @megccowan

• You can connect with Sam over on Instagram – @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.

Can balancing faith with personal freedom bring true inner peace? In this episode, we sit down with Elise as she shares her raw journey of growing up in a Pentecostal family, where she struggled to balance genuine friendships with heavy religious expectations. Elise opens up about the emotional toll of marriage, depression, and Bible college, highlighting the idolization of overwork in Pentecostal churches and its impact on her well-being. As she deconstructs her faith, Elise reflects on how therapy and self-reflection helped her redefine her beliefs and find safe, authentic spiritual spaces.

More About Elise

Elise is a Trauma-Informed Counsellor and Coach based in Melbourne, Australia, who is passionate about supporting individuals recovering from Religious Trauma. For decades, she denied her own humanity, constantly pushing herself beyond her physical, emotional, and spiritual limits, unable to say 'no' or slow down due to a deep fear of not being enough. Depression, anxiety, chronic low self-esteem, and perfectionism were her constant companions, while religion, a significant part of her life, only seemed to fuel her self-loathing. She internalised beliefs of being inherently sinful and unworthy of love, living in fear of eternal punishment if she fell outside of God's grace. This relentless need to prove her worth to God, the church, and herself eventually pushed her to the brink.

Gradually, Elise learned to embrace her doubts, questions, pain, and anger, as well as the joy, freedom, curiosity, and self-acceptance that came with letting go. Now, she is deeply passionate about walking alongside others as they reconnect with their own humanity, which is always deserving of love, care, and gentle compassion.

Connect With Us

• You can find out more about Elise via her website - https://www.eliseheerde.com
• Or you can connect over on Instagram or Facebook

• To connect with Sam on Instagram - @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.

In this episode of "Beyond the Surface," we explore Meg's powerful journey of faith deconstruction, beginning with her upbringing in a Christian family in New Zealand and involvement in a conservative Pentecostal church. Meg shares her experiences with purity culture, the internal conflicts of being a devout Christian while navigating typical teenage behaviours, and the impact on her relationship with God and sense of self. We also discuss the tension between church leadership, personal well-being, and family life, and the healing that came from stepping back from church roles to focus on health and personal growth.

More About Meg

Meg is a Sex and Relationship Coach specialising in helping people recovering from the shame-based religious teachings of purity culture and the deconstruction of their faith. She has trained in Clinical Sexology, Trauma Informed Care, is a Certified Advanced Sex and Relationship Coach and Integrated Intimacy Practitioner.

She supports people to explore personal agency and intimate connection.

Meg is also a Protect Accredited Trainer (New Zealands leading protection and self defense agency). For more than 14 years she's worked with clients to help them identify the behavioural and psychological signs of abuse and practical strategies for staying safe.

In all these areas her work focuses on the mind-body connections that help people recover from trauma and find freedom in their bodies.

As the creator of the couples guide to Hotter Sex in 10 days, and The Shame-free Sex Course she delivers empowering practical skills to people all around the world on these subjects.

Connect With Us

• You can reach Meg on her website - https://megcowan.com
• You can also connect over on Instagram - @megccowan

• You can connect with Sam over on Instagram - @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.

Claire's faith journey, from strict Catholic rituals to the allure of evangelicalism, highlights the clash between public and private religious life, leading to relational trauma and disillusionment with church marketing tactics. Her story reveals the business-like nature of church operations and the mental health struggles that arise from pressure to conform. After leaving her church during the COVID-19 pandemic, Claire found space for reflection and healing, sharing her story to offer hope to others navigating spiritual deconstruction.

More About Claire

Claire is a 32, former Catholic and evangelical. She grew up attending Catholic school but later moved away and found non-denominational churches, which initially seemed more "open." Over time, she realised they weren't. She married a youth pastor, and together they recognised the toxicity of their religious environment and decided to leave. In recent years, she's been working through the indoctrination from her childhood and early 20s.

Connect With Us

• You can find Claire over on Instagram & TikTok

• To connect with Sam on Instagram - @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.

Stacey shares her journey of navigating faith, identity, and self-discovery after a painful divorce and joining an evangelical Pentecostal community.

She reveals the emotional highs and manipulative undertones of church life, the struggle between divine perfection and self-acceptance, and the challenges of embracing authenticity in matters of faith and sexuality. Through raw honesty, Stacey explores the complexities of organised religion, the business-like nature of church operations, and her own theological awakenings. Her story underscores the transformative power of deconstructing faith and finding supportive spaces.

Who Is Stacey?

A Queer counsellor and sex therapist advocating for positive sex information for all humans. Ex-Pentecostal leader married to a Non Binary human who had their own journey being Queer in church and ambushed conversion. Stacey left the church in 2019 and stepped down. Passionate about empowering LGBTQIA+ individuals and providing space to relearn all elements that were shamed through religion or generational. Stacey is also of Gamilaraay heritage.

Connect With Us

• You can find out more about Stacey's work on her website - http://www.rainbowservices.co
• You can also connect over on Instagram - @rainbowservices.cc

• To connect with Sam on Instagram - @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.