Beyond The Surface

In this episode, Rachel shares her story of being immersed into the IBLP (Institute in Basic Life Principles), where the teachings of Bill Gothard shaped her understanding of faith, identity, and community in deeply controlling ways. She reflects on how the subtle mechanisms of spiritual abuse left lasting impacts on her ability to trust, belong, and feel secure in herself, even after leaving. As Rachel traces her gradual disentanglement from the IBLP framework, she sheds light on the resilience required to unlearn harmful teachings and rebuild a life outside of rigid religious control. Her honesty offers listeners both insight into the lingering effects of spiritual abuse and hope in the possibility of healing, as she speaks to the ongoing process of reclaiming identity, truth, and freedom on her own terms.

Who Is Rachel?

Rachel Lees is an award-winning New Zealand writer in Tauranga and the author of “Sacred Grooming”. The online memoir details her experience of being hand selected at 20 and groomed over years by American fundamentalist cult leader Bill Gothard of the Institute in Basic Life Principles (IBLP). As one of the whistle-blowers which led to the downfall of the Christo-fascist organisation and resignation of the leader, and then filing a lawsuit against Gothard in 2015, Rachel withstood many personal attacks against her. She is passionate about speak more on predatory grooming and the healing that comes from the pursuit of justice.

Connect With Us

• You can connect with Rachel on Instagram or Substack

• You can find out more about Sam on her website – www.anchoredcounsellingservices.com.au
• To connect with Sam on Instagram – @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.
• Also check out The Religious Trauma Collective

In this episode, Scott, a Japanese American, reflects on his journey of navigating faith, race, and identity within evangelical Christianity. His parents adopted the church as a path to assimilation after the trauma of their own internment during World War II, a legacy that shaped his childhood in predominantly white spaces where he often felt alienated. While evangelicalism offered belonging, it also demanded conformity, leading Scott to eventually question its contradictions and begin the hard work of deconstruction.

He shares the emotional labor of disentangling belief from dogma, and how cultural trauma, racial identity, and political realities like Christian nationalism complicate that process. Scott speaks candidly about the loneliness and struggle of leaving faith, but also about the healing found in community and the freedom of embracing uncertainty. His reflections point toward a spirituality grounded not in rigid certainties but in authenticity, compassion, and the courage to hold space for mystery.

Who Is Scott?

Scott is a 4th generation Japanese American author, musician, and podcaster. Creator/host of Chapel Probation and co-host of The Horny Chapel, Asians in Baseball, and Let's Talk About Text with Blake Chastain. Author of Asian American Apostate: Losing Religion and Finding Myself at an Evangelical University. Composer and editor at Axis Mundi Media with Brad Onishi.

Connect With Us

• Scott's Website - http://rscottokamoto.com
• Connect via Facebook or Instagram

• You can find out more about Sam on her website – www.anchoredcounsellingservices.com.au
• To connect with Sam on Instagram – @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.
• Also check out The Religious Trauma Collective

Sally shares her journey of recovering from her time in Providence, a high-control cult that exploited her search for belonging. From her childhood as a Vietnamese immigrant to the manipulative dynamics that drew her into the group, Sally reflects on how cults prey on vulnerability and maintain control through fear and psychological tactics. Her story sheds light on both the personal cost of spiritual abuse and the broader patterns of coercion within such movements. Through honesty and courage, Sally also speaks to the process of healing, finding community, rebuilding identity, and reclaiming hope after trauma.

Who Is Sally?

Sally is a Vietnamese-Chinese-Australian counsellor with lived experience of cult trauma, supporting ex-Providence and Shincheonji members for over five years. She offers trauma-informed counselling and exit support to help people rebuild safety, reconnect with themselves, and rediscover their own values.

Connect With Us

• You can connect with Sally via her website - https://www.ahavacounselling.com.au/

• You can find out more about Sam on her website – www.anchoredcounsellingservices.com.au
• To connect with Sam on Instagram – @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.
• Also check out The Religious Trauma Collective

T shares their powerful story of spending over two decades in a coercive Sufi group and what it meant to finally walk away. We talk about the search for belonging that can draw people into high-control spaces, the manipulation and fear that keep them there, and the emotional cost of suppressing identity for the sake of faith.

T reflects on cultic vows, spiritual betrayal, and the resilience it took to reclaim their truth and embracing their sexuality during the pandemic and navigating today’s hostile climate around trans and reproductive healthcare. Their story is one of both heartbreak and renewal, showing how healing and self-definition are possible even after deep religious harm.

Who Is T?

Born in the US, T graduated from Union Theological Seminary in New York City in 1993. Once a gay feminist liberation theologian, they later spent over two decades (1997–2020) in a coercive Sufi Muslim group in the American Midwest, where obedience to a “living guru” became central to their life. After leaving during the Covid pandemic, T has been reclaiming their sense of self and voice. They are now an activist and a PhD candidate in performance, bringing both lived experience and academic insight to their work as they continue the process of recovery and transformation.

Connect With Us

• For all details surrounding T and his performance pieces head to - https://quityourcult.net
• You can also connect via Facebook, Instagram or YouTube

• You can find out more about Sam on her website – www.anchoredcounsellingservices.com.au
• To connect with Sam on Instagram – @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.
• Also check out The Religious Trauma Collective

Janice shares her story of growing up in religion, specifically a Pentecostal family in Canada, where vibrant expressions of faith like speaking in tongues were part of daily life. Raised by parents transformed by their beliefs, she navigated the tension between familial love, purity culture, and the pull of individual identity, a journey that would eventually inspire her to write Divorcing Religion. Janice reflects on pivotal moments, from high school relationships that sparked a crisis of faith to a “back to Jesus” chapter that ultimately gave way to deconstruction. We discuss the emotional toll of leaving fundamentalism, the comfort she found in new secular communities, and the healing role of open conversation, resources like Dr. Marlene Winnell’s work. Through candid reflections on family boundaries, forgiveness, and self-acceptance, Janice offers a heartfelt look at religious trauma and the resilience it takes to move beyond it, leaving listeners with both hope and a sense of solidarity.

Who Is Janice?

Janice is a Registered Professional Counsellor. Founder of CORT (Conference on Religious Trauma) and Shameless Sexuality: Life After Purity Culture. Host of the Divorcing Religion Podcast. Author of Divorcing Religion: A Memoir & Survival Handbook, Creator of SEX & POWER Speaker Series. She spent 40 years as a devout Christian. Divorced religion (and her pastor-husband) about 15 years ago and never looked back! Now her life is devoted to helping others recover from religious trauma and embrace this one beautiful, messy, delicious life.

Connect With Us

• Find all you need on Janice's website - https://www.divorcing-religion.com/
• You can find CORT over on Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/@ComeToCORT
• You can also connect over on Instagram or Facebook

• You can find out more about Sam on her website – www.anchoredcounsellingservices.com.au
• To connect with Sam on Instagram – @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.
• Also check out The Religious Trauma Collective

In this episode, I sit down with Elise as she reflects on her experience growing up in a Pentecostal mega-church and the long, layered process of leaving a high-control religious community. She shares how fear and obedience were embedded in her early beliefs, and how that shaped her sense of self for years. As we talk through the pivotal moments that led to her deconstruction, Elise opens up about the inner conflict, grief, and eventual freedom that came with walking away from faith. We also explore how finding the right language became a powerful part of her healing, because sometimes, putting words to your experience is the first act of reclaiming it. This conversation is an invitation to anyone who’s ever struggled to name what happened to them, and a reminder that defining your own story can be a radical, grounding act.

Who Is Elise?

Elise Heerde (she/her) is a Certified Coach who helps people recover from religious trauma and cultic systems. Her work is grounded in lived experience, professional training, and a passion for creating safe, judgment-free spaces with a splash of sarcasm. Elise blends authenticity and hope in all she offers. Co-founder of The Religious Trauma Collective (Australia/New Zealand) Her memoir Holy Hell: Saved So Hard I Needed Therapy was released May 2025.

Connect With Us

• You can find out more about Elise via her website – https://www.eliseheerde.com
• Or you can connect over on Instagram or Facebook
• You can purchase her book Holy Hell: Saved So Hard I Needed Therapy over on Amazon

• You can find out more about Sam on her website – www.anchoredcounsellingservices.com.au
• To connect with Sam on Instagram – @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.
• Also check out The Religious Trauma Collective

In this deeply moving episode, Erica shares her story of growing up in a religious household in Canada and then moving to Australia, a childhood shaped by fear, guilt, and shame. Her reflections offer insight into the painful journey of untangling self-worth from the expectations of family and faith. We talk about what it means to deconstruct beliefs that were never truly yours, the shame that purity culture breeds, and the disconnection from one’s own body and desires that can follow.

Erica’s journey is also shaped by her experience of being neurodivergent, adding another layer to the complexity of surviving high-control religious environments. She opens up about body image, sexuality, and the long road to self-compassion, especially when society and religion have tied your value to your purity. And in a surprising twist, Erica’s discovery about her biological origins prompts a fresh reckoning with her past.

This conversation is for anyone listening who’s ever wrestled with identity, family, or faith. Her story is a reminder that healing is messy, layered, and worth every step.

Who Is Erica?

Erica Webb is a registered counsellor, somatic exercise coach and highly sensitive person. She supports other highly sensitive women to discover their sensitivity superpowers and more confidently navigate the tricky bits of being a sensitive person in an often insensitive world. 

Erica combines her training in Behavioural Science, Counselling, and various mindful movement modalities, along with her understanding of the nervous system’s role in trauma, pain and high sensitivity. She focuses on Self-Compassion, Kindness and Curiosity as key components to foster resilience as a sensitive human navigating the world. 

Erica works with clients 1-1 and in her online membership space, the SelfKind Hub. She is also host of the podcast SelfKind with Erica Webb and cohost of the podcast Midlife Unfiltered: The Season of Me.

Connect With Us

• You can learn more about Erica on her website
• Connect with Erica on both Facebook & Instagram
• You can also listen to Erica’s Podcasts SelfKind & Midlife Unfiltered: The Season of Me

• You can find out more about Sam on her website – www.anchoredcounsellingservices.com.au
• To connect with Sam on Instagram – @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.
• Also check out The Religious Trauma Collective

Growing up in the Mormon church, Daisy was expected to follow the rules - and bring her siblings back into the fold. But beneath the surface of religious rituals and gender expectations was a deeper struggle with mental health, body image, and the pressure to be the “good girl.” In this episode, Daisy opens up about the impact of purity culture, the silence around emotional wellbeing, and the loneliness of living in a community that misreads pain as a spiritual flaw.

Her story explores what happens after you leave: the guilt, the shame, the slow work of finding yourself again. Daisy shares how writing, community, and coming out as bisexual became lifelines in her journey toward freedom. This conversation is a tender and honest look at what it means to untangle your identity from a faith that tried to define it for you.

Who Is Daisy?

Daisy lives in the Utah Valley with her husband and three kids. When she’s not writing her next book, she’s reading, cooking, and spending time with her family. Her love of writing has been prominent since childhood, and she’s always felt a call to share her stories, as well as been encouraged to by her late grandpa. A hopeless romantic since she first saw The Phantom of the Opera at age eight, she’s been writing her own romances ever since!

She’s a former member of a high demand religion and hopes to bring light to the issues of the church in which she was raised, while also telling beautiful stories about life after leaving.

As a fat woman, body inclusivity is extremely important to her, so most of her FMCs, and some of her MMCs, will be fat baddies who get their HEA. She’s also a member of the LGBTQ+ community, and it’s important to her that everyone who reads her books feels safe and welcome.

Connect With Us

• You can find more about Daisy on her website - https://www.daisywren.com/
• Or you can connect over on Instagram.

• You can find out more about Sam on her website - www.anchoredcounsellingservices.com.au
• To connect with Sam on Instagram - @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.
• Also check out The Religious Trauma Collective

Luke grew up as the youngest of five, navigating family dynamics and a complicated relationship with faith. His journey from rural Canada to a deeply evangelical college in the U.S. brought him face-to-face with teachings that clashed with his emerging queer identity. In this episode, Luke shares candid reflections on conversion therapy, the pressures of purity culture, and the emotional toll of trying to conform in high-control religious spaces.

Through humour, honesty, and vulnerability, Luke tells the story of finding his way back to himself. From shame and suppression to joy and self-expression, this conversation is a powerful reminder of what’s possible when we stop hiding and start healing.

Who Is Lucas?

Lucas Wilson is a SSHRC Postdoctoral Fellow at University of Toronto Mississauga and was formerly the Justice, Equity, and Transformation Postdoctoral Fellow at University of Calgary. A survivor of conversion therapy, he is the editor of Shame-Sex Attraction: Survivors’ Stories of Conversion Therapy.

He is also the author of At Home with the Holocaust: Postmemory, Domestic Space, and Second-Generation Holocaust Narratives, which received the Jordan Schnitzer First Book Publication Award. His public-facing writing has appeared in The Advocate, Queerty, LGBTQ Nation, and Religion Dispatches, among other venues.

Connect With Us

• Find more about Lucas here - https://utschools.academia.edu/LucasWilson
• You can connect on socials Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn

• You can find out more about Sam on her website - www.anchoredcounsellingservices.com.au
• To connect with Sam on Instagram - @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.
• Also check out The Religious Trauma Collective

This episode shares the powerful story of Grace, whose journey through religious trauma and identity is deeply intertwined with her experience of asexuality. Raised in a strict Calvinistic Baptist church, Grace was taught doctrines like total depravity and original sin, which left her believing she was fundamentally broken. These messages shaped her early understanding of self-worth, shame, and sexuality.

Her story is a reminder of how difficult it can be to explore identity when your framework for understanding yourself is steeped in fear and control. Through it all, her connection to nature and a more agnostic spirituality has offered peace.

Who Is Grace?

Grace was born in England, moving to Aotearoa at age 13. She was homeschooled throughout her upbringing in a conservative Christian family, though she no longer identifies with the faith. These days, she resonates more with agnostic or atheist perspectives.

Grace is neurodivergent and lives with anxiety and depression, and she’s currently awaiting an ADHD diagnosis. She is a survivor of child sexual assault and purity culture, and speaks openly about the long-term impacts of both. Grace identifies as asexual and demisexual and is married to an incredible man. She’s aesthetically attracted to both men and women (though she’ll tell you women take the lead there).

She’s currently studying psychology and working toward a career that reflects her lived experience and deep empathy for others.

Connect With Us

• You can connect with Grace via Instagram

• You can find out more about Sam on her website - www.anchoredcounsellingservices.com.au
• To connect with Sam on Instagram - @anchoredcounsellingservices
• Want to contact with Sam about the podcast or therapy? Use this contact form.
• Also check out The Religious Trauma Collective