Clarity on Fire

Blog: How to avoid small talk & have deeper conversations


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I don't know if it's my face (whatever the opposite of 'resting bitch face' is, I have that) or my overall demeanor or what, but I must have an invisible sign hanging around my neck that says, "Hello stranger! Please strike up a conversation with me."

This happens to me everywhere, including (no kidding) while I'm changing in the women's locker room at the gym. I can't even avoid it when I'm half-dressed!

The other day at yoga, I was in a crappy mood and I actively tried to put off a "don't talk to me" vibe because I just wanted to be left alone. Three women separately approached me after class to strike up a conversation. I had to laugh.

So I give up! I accept that this is just the way I am.

And mostly, I don't mind it so much. I like hearing people's stories (I mean, it's what my entire job is centered around, after all!), and I've met some really cool people because of this superpower/curse of mine.

The only real problem is that I hate small talk. Having endless polite, surface-level, meaningless conversations with strangers is my idea of "the bad place." (Shudder.)

So, since I end up talking to random people all the time, it's been crucial for me to figure out how to dive straight into the conversation deep-end, to avoid the awful awkwardness of small talk.

I'm sharing 4 ways I've learned to avoid small talk, have better conversations, and ultimately, build deeper connections with the people in my life.

IF YOU LIKED THIS, YOU SHOULD ALSO CHECK OUT…

For the love of god, stop asking people, "So, what do you do?"

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Clarity on FireBy Rachel East and Kristen Walker

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