We've all heard the advice that, if you want to be a more confident person, you've got to "fake it 'til you make it."

As in, if you pretend to be confident for long enough, eventually you'll actually FEEL confident.

Who knows, maybe that works for some people. But I think for most of us, faking confidence when we're not feeling it just makes us feel … well, fake.

A client of mine has been role-playing the confident, bold girl-boss at her latest job. In her mind, confident people are the ones who walk into a room and immediately take charge; they're the ones "crushing it" at work and "doing it all" in life in general. So she's been trying to act the part, and from an outside perspective she's doing it quite convincingly.

The thing is, she's a ball of anxiousness on the inside. She feels like a fraud, she's constantly worrying that it's all going to come crumbling down around her, and she's tired and overwhelmed all the time.

Her attempt at becoming a more confident person isn't working because she's going about it entirely wrong. In fact, her whole concept of confidence is skewed, as is most of ours.

Confidence isn't about being the loudest, boldest person in the room. It's not about "doing it all" or "crushing it" in life. It's not about being fearless or never having doubts.

It's about something much deeper and far less sexy.

I'm sharing my take on what self-confidence is really about, and how to become a more confident person (no "faking it" required!) in this week's new blog.

GET ON THE VIP LIST FOR OUR NEW PEOPLE PLEASING COURSE!

We're going to have a brand-new course later this summer about getting over people pleasing!

It's going to be fairly short and affordable, and will be more of a group-based program. We aren't ready to share more info yet, but if you'd like to be kept in the loop so you don't miss any updates, join this VIP list and we'll be in touch with more info soon!

IF YOU LIKED THIS, YOU'LL ALSO LOVE…

Overcoming impostor syndrome (July 2018)

Honing your intuition (& knowing when it's really fear)

Getting over your 'all or nothing' obsession with Amy Everhart

Treating life like a magical scavenger hunt with Francisca Hernandez

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