How does it feel to be seen?

What is it like to be listened to in a way that you feel deeply understood?

How often have you listened to others in this way? And, how often have you been listened to like this?

In his book, Caring Enough to Confront, David Augsberger writes:

"Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person they are almost indistinguishable."

During our time together Juliana Tafur shared this beautiful quote with me as we explored the art and science of listening in ways that lead to meaningful connection, deeper relationships, understanding, empathy, and compassion.

And ultimately how we can build bridges across difference.

In this beautiful and practical conversation Juliana will share some of her story, insights from her work as a journalist, documentary filmmaker, and Program Director for the Greater Good Science Center’s Bridging Differences Program.

Highlights include:

• A framework for compassionate listening
• The importance of giving ourselves and others grace while engaging in the imperfect and messy process of constructive dialogue
• Why opening the heart across difference begins with tuning into self
• Discerning when to engage in constructive dialogue and when it’s safer, and wiser, not to. 
• The power of asking questions from a place of genuine curiosity
• Letting go of winning as a fundamental practice of effective listening
• Why listening is an act of courage
• The importance of recognizing and appreciating complexity in other people’s stories, and lived experiences 
• Ways to quiet the ego in tough conversations including recognizing our common humanity

If you find today’s conversation intriguing check out the Bridging Differences Program at the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley as they offer a a lot of free resources including the Bridging Differences Playbook. 

Did you find this episode inspiring? Here are other conversations we think you'll love:

• Rediscovering the art of constructive dialogue | Dr. Mylien Duong
• Practicing the art of principled rebellion | Dr. Todd Kashdan
• Is curiosity a superpower? | Dr. Jud Brewer

More about Juliana:

Juliana Tafur is the program director for GGSC’s Bridging Differences Program, applying her experience as social entrepreneur and founder of Listen Courageously, and as Emmy-nominated senior television producer and award-winning documentary filmmaker. Juliana creates resources rooted in science to bridge political and cultural divides. She also forges strategic partnerships across sectors—government, education, philanthropy, and public service—and oversees communities of practice, to ensure bridge-building skills and resources reach people and strengthen social cohesion across the US. As a Colombian-American devoted to listening to bridge what divides us (as seen on her TEDx talk), fostering a broader culture of belonging—through dialogue, connections, and understanding—is her life’s mission.

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