Can We Talk First?

This week is a first for the podcast, where my guests aren't just a real-life couple, but a real-life lesbian married couple: former podcast guests Andrea and her wife Dani, the Perez-Acostas! I could have just said married couple, but who doesn't love lesbians? Dani is a member of a super secret sorority, so I figured it'd be appropriate that this week we watch videos about sorority sisters! A lot of fun stuff in this one from hazing rituals to Philly parties. Then, another podcast first: Andrea listens to her wife answer my porn lightning round! Sex dungeons come up again, and now we get to hear Dani's take on how you explain to your children you have a sex dungeon.

Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/thankbrandon

Follow the show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/canwetalkfirst

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thankbrandon

Submit videos for me to roast and critique on the podcast by sending them to [email protected]

Cats? What the hell does that mean? Great question, loyal listener. This week I have yet again discovered a new type of porn where women pretend to be cats, and I couldn't think of a better person to invite back on the podcast to watch some than stand up comic and self-proclaimed cat person Katie Kusiciel! After we freak out over the weirdest videos of all time, a fierce debate ensues on having a pet vs a baby. Also, Katie reveals the meanest thing she's ever done, which is one of the wildest and ingenious things I've ever heard. Like the podcast is worth listening to for that alone, plus we talk about a bunch of other shit.

Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/thankbrandon

Follow the show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/canwetalkfirst

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thankbrandon

Submit videos for me to roast and overanalyze on the podcast by sending them to [email protected] 

One and two and three and turn on the porn, because this week I'm watching some dancer porn with professional dancer Alex CHI Johnson. We talk his dance origins in Chicago, working with Beyonce's choreographer, and how to teach an unteachable dancer (me). Then we get into the craziest dance move he's ever been asked to do, his worst dance gig, Dance Moms, and more. Alex also reveals his truly impressive sexual badge of honor, and I learn about "dance dick" and how to combat it. I also find out there's a difference between popping and locking. Who knew? Most people? Probably.

Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/thankbrandon

Follow the show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/canwetalkfirst

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thankbrandon

Submit videos for me to roast and overanalyze on the podcast by sending them to [email protected] 

The synth-pop bad boy, Sal DiAndrea, is back and joins me to celebrate our nation's independence from who cares, we're watching 4th of July porn. Look, I'm writing this on the 4th of July, I'm drunk, and and don't feel like going all out on a description. Just know it's another classic episode with the synth-pop bad boy. Lot of funny stuff: we share our best 4th of July memories, tackle some uncharted porn ground, and discuss my 6th grade birthday party at Hooters. Definitely other stuff too, but that's what comes to mind. I love you all. Tell a friend about the podcast if you like it. Happy 4th of July.

Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/thankbrandon

Follow the show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/canwetalkfirst

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thankbrandon

Submit videos for me to roast and overanalyze on the podcast by sending them to [email protected] 

Tape up your glasses, nerds. Because this week it's all about nerd girls in porn with nerd girl and stand up comedian Holly Anabel Brown. It's a wild episode. Holly talks about finding a journal with the list of all the women her dead dad slept with, the time she had sex with one of her college professors, and getting caught watching cartoon porn by her mom. Then we have a long conversation about my interest in MILFs, including the origin story of the first MILF I was ever into, and so much more. Definitely the most erotic episode of "the least erotic podcast about porn" yet.

Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/thankbrandon

Follow the show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/canwetalkfirst

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thankbrandon

Submit videos for me to roast and overanalyze on the podcast by sending them to [email protected] 

This week I'm with rapper Billy Jones aka D. Vine. He's one of my best friends, and since I had him pick the topic for his brother, previous podcast guest Najeeb Jones I had Najeeb pick a topic for him: "Stuck Porn" where an actor pretends to be stuck in a conveniently compromising position and during the process of getting them out, sex ensues. The videos out to be a bit more rapey than I had anticipated, which I sincerely apologize for. Other than that and the obvious audio fuck up during the first 2/3 of the podcast, it's a pretty fun episode. I reveal some weird things from my childhood, Billy tells a story about stealing a car, Cardi B is discussed briefly, among other things. Then during the porn lightning round we talk about our differing feelings on POV and getting offended during sex.

Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/thankbrandon

Follow the show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/canwetalkfirst

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thankbrandon

Submit videos for me to roast and overanalyze on the podcast by sending them to [email protected]

It's Dia de Los Daddies, and who better to watch some Father's Day porn with than resident pod-dad David Garcia! He's about to celebrate his first Father's Day as a dad, so I figured it'd be special for him to be here to celebrate the podcast's first Father's Day as well. David tells me the story of how he found out he was becoming a father, then tries explaining to me why he decided to keep the baby (which was above my comprehension). David gets vulnerable, so I open up about a vulnerability of my own in regards to having children. David's girlfriend was also in the studio… apartment and asks me what I would do if I was in their situation. All that and more. It's funny, it's heartwarming. All around great episode.

Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/thankbrandon

Follow the show on Twitter: https://twitter.com/thankbrandon

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thankbrandon/

Submit videos for me to roast and overanalyze on the podcast by sending them to [email protected]

Here children! Gather 'round and listen to pornographic stories about the Amish with myself and Lancaster born local talent booker for the Punchline in Philadelphia, Rachel Sherts! I honestly learned a lot more about Amish people in this one than I thought… not from the porn obviously. We talk about what would happen if men got pregnant, terrible comedy club experiences, the time a pit bull she was walking got off the leash, and a giant brawl during a Charlie Murphy show. Then, during the porn lightning round, we both reveal our childhood fantasies, and mine are the saddest of them all.

Follow me on twitter: https://twitter.com/thankbrandon

Follow the show on twitter: https://twitter.com/canwetalkfirst

Submit videos for me to overanalyze on the pdocast by sending them to [email protected]