🌈 Meet Kiki Joy Latham: soulful singer, survivor, and later in life lesbian. In this episode, Kiki shares their journey in a conversation with host Anne-Marie Zanzal, and it is a true story of self-discovery, navigating queer identity, and championing challenges faced in relationships and spirituality. From their early life in a diverse community to experiences with love, faith, and the search for belonging, Kiki's story is one of resilience and empowerment. Kiki discusses the impact of toxic relationships and spiritual abuse, and how they ultimately found their voice and community in the LGBTQIA+ space.

❓ What to Expect in This Episode:

🌈 Kiki's experiences of rejection and trauma in early relationships and their path to self-acceptance provides inspiration to those who may be struggling.

📣 Emphasis on the importance of finding a supportive community.

❤️‍🩹Discussion about spiritual abuse and deconstructing religion.

🧑🏼‍🤝‍🧑🏿Inspiration so that you, too, might find hope for greater fulfilment after a period of intense struggle and loneliness. 

Real Stories, Real Advice: Kiki's story reminds us of the powerful forces that can keep women from recognizing their authentic sexuality. Kiki's strict upbringing, experiences with racism and manipulative conversative faith communities diverted her from their inner voice. Ultimately Kiki began to listen to that inner voice telling them something was wrong, leading to a path of self-discovery and greater happiness as they embraced their queer identity.

✨ Why This Matters:

So often, people who come out later in life do not see themselves or their experiences reflected, and therefore experience difficulty locating their identity of the LGBTQIA+ spectrum. Kiki provides us with a model of a strong, talented, Black and queer individual who overcame the odds to become the happy, thriving queer person they are today.

📌🎙️About Authentically Us

Later in lifers have unique needs. Authentically Us is a space where women can participate in discussions, attend support groups & find education on exploring sexuality, coming out, queer relationships and more. You can find Authentically Us here: https://community.annemariezanzal.com/landing?space_id=17760704

💬 Join the Conversation:

Are you struggling with deconstructing religion or have experienced spiritual abuse or racism? How is your story similar to Kiki's? Tell us about it in the comments.

You can find Kiki on Instagram as @lovekikijoy.

🔗 Visit our website:

Anne-Marie's : [ annemariezanzal.com]

🔗 Follow us on social media:

💠 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amzanzal

💠 Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/annemariezanzalcoaching/

💠 Twitter: twitter.com/annemariezanzal

💠LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/annemariezanzalpurposefulempowerment/

The Three Big Questions You've GOT to Ask Before Coming Out | Coming Out & Beyond: LGBTQIA+ Stories |Season 6 Episode 9 

🌈 If you're a woman reevaluating your sexuality later in life, this episode is going to change things for you. Why? Because host Anne-Marie Zanzal and fellow coming out coach Barbara Rowlandson talk about the three most important questions you need to ask yourself at the start of your sexual awakening/coming out journey. Anne-Marie and Barb, both later-in-life lesbians who work in this very niche community supporting women who come out in their 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, and beyond, share some common threads of the coming out experience and wisdom that can help you find the courage to make hard decisions.

Download the free 3 Questions Guide: api.leadconnectorhq.com/widget/form/4qBZycuEelYRSvpLNy1M

In this episode, Anne-Marie and Barb also make reference to the Dealing with Guilt and Shame Guide. If you'd like to check it out, it's free too: api.leadconnectorhq.com/widget/form/QFAgIx30gAptZxdsUNjP

❓ What to Expect in This Episode:

🌈 Anne-Marie and Barb explain why the question of our sexuality often surfaces when things seem to be going great.

📣 Discussion on why the "good girl's prescription for a happy life" doesn't make us fully happy.

❤️‍🩹An explanation of disenfranchised grief: what it is, and why it can make this process so much harder.

🧑🏼‍🤝‍🧑🏿Sharing Authentically Us, a community, support and learning space for women who are going through the sexual reevaluation and coming out process.

Real Stories, Real Advice: Women who are just starting this journey often don't know where to go next and feel stuck between feelings of not wanting to "ruin" their lives and intense desire for intimate connection with women. This episode addresses that place of being stuck, offering questions that can help lead you to some clarity about what you want and next steps.

✨ Why This Matters:

There is so little awareness and support out there for women who are questioning their sexuality later in life. This episode directly addresses where you can find the support you need, directing you to a place where you can talk about what you're experiencing without fear of judgement, with people who understand this journey.

📌🎙️About Authentically Us 

Later in lifers have unique needs. Authentically Us is a space where women can participate in discussions, attend support groups & find education on exploring sexuality, coming out, queer relationships and more. You can find Authentically Us here: https://community.annemariezanzal.com/landing?space_id=17760704

💬 Join the Conversation:

Are you struggling with feeling like you want to be with a woman? Worried about what this means for you and the people you care about? Share your thoughts, experiences, and questions in the comments below. Let’s foster a supportive community where we can learn from each other.

🔗 Visit our website:

Anne-Marie's : [ annemariezanzal.com]

🔗 Follow us on social media:

💠 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amzanzal

💠 Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/annemariezanzalcoaching/

💠 Twitter: twitter.com/annemariezanzal

💠LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/annemariezanzalpurposefulempowerment/

👉 Don’t forget to like, share, and subscribe for more inspiring stories and advice on navigating life, love, and everything in between!

👣A Path to Spiritual Healing🏳️‍🌈 The Role of Affirming Spiritual Direction for the LGBTQIA+ Community | Season 6 Episode 8

🌈 This week on "Coming Out & Beyond: LGBTQIA+ Stories" host Anne-Marie Zanzal spends some time in conversation with Canadian spiritual director, Joan Alexander. Joan serves on the faculty of several formation programs teaching and supervising students in ministry. She facilitates workshops and webinars on topics such as spiritual accompaniment to the LGBTQIA+ community, spiritual trauma, hurting and healing. Joan currently serves on the board of directors of Spiritual Directors International.

❓ What to Expect in This Episode:

🌈 Understanding the nature of professional spiritual direction.

🪞 Reflecting on the impact of coming out on spirituality.

❤️‍🩹Working with trauma in spiritual direction.

📋Using the Enneagram assessment tool and much more!

Real Stories, Real Advice: This episode is a must listen for anyone is LGBTQIA+ and has spiritual wounds from faith communities. Joan reviews her spiritual direction tools – conversation, prayer, community, Enneagram assessments, dream work and symbolism – and gives us a mini-demonstration of how they are used in spiritual direction.

✨ Why This Matters:

This episode shows us how spiritual direction can help LGBTQIA+ individuals reclaim their spirituality.

📌🎙️About Joan Alexander: You can find Joan online at https://www.joanalexanderspiritualdirector.com/Joan offers spiritual directions sessions on a sliding scale. If you use Joan's Calendly to book a session, please put a note in at the time of booking that you found her through the Coming Out & Beyond: LGBTQIA+ Stories podcast!

💬 Join the Conversation:

Are you a member of the LGBTQIA+ community who has a complicated relationship with spirituality and faith? Share your thoughts, experiences, and questions in the comments below. Let’s foster a supportive community where we can learn from each other.

🔗 Visit our website:

Anne-Marie's : [ annemariezanzal.com]

🌟 Why Watch This Episode? Many in the LGBTQIA+ community experience religious trauma and become disconnected from their spiritual lives. Anne-Marie and Joan, both lesbians in LGBTQIA+ ministries, illuminate a path for wounded individuals to find a way back to their spiritual side, in a way that respects individual dignity and acknowledges trauma.

🔗 Follow us on social media:

💠 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amzanzal

💠 Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/annemariezanzalcoaching/

💠 Twitter: twitter.com/annemariezanzal

💠LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/annemariezanzalpurposefulempowerment/

👉 Don’t forget to like, share, and subscribe for more inspiring stories and advice on navigating life, love, and everything in between!

➡️Reframing Guilt & Shame Part 2: A New Perspective | Season 6 Episode 7

🌈 Welcome to another episode of "Coming Out & Beyond: LGBTQIA+ Stories"!

Host Anne-Marie Zanzal and fellow later-in-lifer Barbara Rowlandson are back this week to talk about recognizing and reframing guilt and shame. Guilt and shame are two of the most common feelings that later-in-lifers struggle with. Anne-Marie and Barb keep the conversation going about these very challenging feelings in the context of coming out, deconstruct them, and offer new perspectives.

❓ What to Expect in This Episode:

🌧️ Values, where we learn them, and dealing with guilt and shame as our values change.

⚖️ Being fair to ourselves, allowing grace for life changes.

🧗‍♀️Cultivating psychological flexibility, strategies for addressing shame, temporary fixes and bargaining during the coming out process, and much more!

Real Stories, Real Advice: Anne-Marie and Barbara talk about guilt and shame in the context of their own lives and experiences.

✨ Why This Matters:

It's important to differentiate between feelings and identity. Reflection and perspective can help in understanding guilt and shame. Women are disproportionately impacted by societally driven guilt and shame based on gender role expectations. Self-compassion is a practice that can significantly reduce these difficult feelings.

📌🎙️About Barbara Rowlandson:

With years of experience as a relationship coach, Barbara specializes in helping LGBTQIA+ individuals and couples create fulfilling and authentic relationships. Her compassionate approach empowers individuals to embrace their identity and build strong connections.

💬 Join the Conversation:

What does dating readiness mean to you? Share your thoughts, experiences, and questions in the comments below. Let’s foster a supportive community where we can learn from each other.

🔗 Visit our website:

Barbara Rowlandson’s : [ lavenderdating.com]

Anne-Marie's : [ annemariezanzal.com]

🌟 Why Watch This Episode?

If you're a later in lifer in what we call "The Messy Middle," you might be experiencing a great deal of guilt and shame over your sexual identity, wanting divorce, impacting your children, or going against your faith tradition. In this episode, you'll learn you aren't alone in those feelings, feel understood, and begin to learn ways to navigate the murky waters of guilt and shame.

🔗 Follow us on social media:

💠 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amzanzal

💠 Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/annemariezanzalcoaching/

💠 Twitter: twitter.com/annemariezanzal

💠LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/annemariezanzalpurposefulempowerment/

➡️Reframing Guilt & Shame Associated with Coming Out Later in Life : Season 6 Episode 6

🌈 Welcome to another episode of "Coming Out & Beyond: LGBTQIA+ Stories"!

Host Anne-Marie Zanzal invites fellow later-in-lifer Barbara Rowlandson back to the podcast to talk about everyone's favorite topic 🙄, guilt and shame! Guilt and shame are two of the most common feelings that later-in-lifers struggle with. Anne-Marie and Barb have a conversation about these very challenging feelings in the context of coming out, deconstruct them, and offer new perspectives.

❓ What to Expect in This Episode:

🌧️ Definitions guilt and shame and understanding the nuanced differences between them.

⚖️ Review justified vs. unjustified guilt and shame and how societal pressures contribute to unjustified guilt.

🧗‍♀️Recognizing how guilt and shame manifest in our bodies, separating our identity from our feelings and more!

Real Stories, Real Advice: Anne-Marie and Barbara talk about guilt and shame in the context of their own lives and experiences.

✨ Why This Matters:

It's important to differentiate between feelings and identity. Reflection and perspective can help in understanding guilt and shame. Women are disproportionately impacted by societally driven guilt and shame based on gender role expectations. Self-compassion is a practice that can significantly reduce these difficult feelings.

📌🎙️About Barbara Rowlandson:

With years of experience as a relationship coach, Barbara specializes in helping LGBTQIA+ individuals and couples create fulfilling and authentic relationships. Her compassionate approach empowers individuals to embrace their identity and build strong connections.

💬 Join the Conversation:

What does dating readiness mean to you? Share your thoughts, experiences, and questions in the comments below. Let’s foster a supportive community where we can learn from each other.

🔗 Visit our website:

Anne-Marie's : [ www.annemariezanzal.com]

Barbara Rowlandson’s : [ www.lavenderdating.com]

🌟 Why Watch This Episode?

If you're a later in lifer in what we call "The Messy Middle," you might be experiencing a great deal of guilt and shame over your sexual identity, wanting divorce, impacting your children, or going against your faith tradition. In this episode, you'll learn you aren't alone in those feelings, feel understood, and begin to learn ways to navigate the murky waters of guilt and shame.

🔗 Follow us on social media:

💠 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amzanzal

💠 Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/annemariezanzalcoaching/

💠 Twitter: twitter.com/annemariezanzal

💠LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/annemariezanzalpurposefulempowerment/

👉 Don’t forget to like, share, and subscribe for more inspiring stories and advice on navigating life, love, and everything in between!

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🌈 Welcome to another episode of "Coming Out & Beyond: LGBTQIA+ Stories"!

In this episode, host Anne-Marie Zanzal and fellow coming-out coach, Barbara Rowlandson, talk about leaning into queer community during challenging times. Informed by their work with later-in-lifers, Anne-Marie and Barb discuss why this demographic of women needs community so much.

❓ What to Expect in This Episode:

✔️ Explanation of the recent changes to Facebook Community Standards that are harmful to the LGBTQIA+ community.

✔️Protecting your mental health during a period of uncertainty that comes with political and social change.

✔️ How, as a newly out person, you can find queer community in real life.

✔️Moving later-in-life lesbian Facebook communities to a safer space (Authentically Us on Mighty Networks).

✨ Why This Matters:

Women who come out later in life often feel like outsiders in both the hetero and LGBTQIA+ worlds. It is common for later-in-lifers to feel alone, and in these uncertain times, many are scared. Now more than ever, later-in-life queer women need to lean into each other for support, camaraderie, joy, and to be seen.

📌🎙️About Barbara Rowlandson

With years of experience as a relationship coach, Barbara specializes in helping LGBTQIA+ individuals and couples create fulfilling and authentic relationships. Her compassionate approach empowers individuals to embrace their identity and build strong connections. Barbara's work is centered on values identification, examining and reevaluating core beliefs, overcoming limiting beliefs, fostering self-worth, and cultivating psychological flexibility.

💬 Join the Conversation:

What does community mean to you? Share your thoughts, experiences, and questions in the comments below. Let’s foster a supportive community where we can learn from each other.

🔗 Visit our website:

Anne-Marie's : [ annemariezanzal.com]

🌟 Why Listen to This Episode?

If you're a queer person who needs to feel connected to others in your community, this episode holds many fantastic suggestions for finding like-minded individuals who will respect your identity.

🔗 Follow us on social media:

💠 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amzanzal

💠 Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/annemariezanzalcoaching/

💠 Twitter: twitter.com/annemariezanzal

💠LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/annemariezanzalpurposefulempowerment/

🌈 Welcome to another episode of "Coming Out & Beyond: LGBTQIA+ Stories"!

In this episode, host Anne-Marie Zanzal interviews Pastor Greg Bullard, the longest-serving affirming pastor in Tennessee. They discuss Greg's coming out journey, the importance of community in faith, and the role of acceptance within the church. Greg shares his experiences growing up in a strict religious environment and how he found his place in the Metropolitan Community Church (MCC). the conversation delves into the challenges of language in faith, the duality of love, and the need for community support. Greg emphasizes the importance of transforming hate into love and creating a beautiful world through action and connection.

❓ What to Expect in This Episode:

✔️ Emphasis on the importance of community to faith and salvation.

✔️ The importance of language in faith matters and how it can be a barrier or a bridge.

✔️The power of transforming hate into love and more!

✨ Why This Matters:

Many within the LGBTQIA+ community experience rejection from their faith communities and suffer religious trauma. Pastor Greg Bullard offers a perspective that makes space for queer individuals and emphasizes that church trauma stems from individuals, not God. Finding friendship and support within a faith community can be deeply meaningful and healing for those who have suffered religious trauma.

📌🎙️About Pastor Greg Bullard:

Pastor Greg Bullard started his ministry in northern Alabama when he first felt the call at his home church. His pastor, then, said, “Greg, I’m sorry you’ll never be able to be in ministry because of who you are, and that’s not fair.” Over three decades later, Pastor Greg has built one of the most long-standing affirming ministries in the Southeast. A graduate of The University of Alabama in Huntsville, he made Nashville his permanent home in the late 1990s. With an accounting and business systems background, he marries his analytical side with his humor and storytelling each week as he ministers in the community and his home church. Greg has been recognized by the Human Rights Campaign, Tennessee Equality Project, Middle Tennessee State University, and Hands On Nashville for his work in LGBTQ+ ministry and food security. He and his husband, Brian, live with their son, Micah, born in 2011 and daughter, Esther, born in 2014. You’ll find his other son, Zach, on the piano bench every Sunday, sharing the ministry. Learn more about Greg here: https://www.covenantofthecross.com/staff-nav

💬 Join the Conversation:

What does faith mean to you? Share your thoughts, experiences, and questions in the comments below. Let’s foster a supportive community where we can learn from each other.

🔗 Visit our website:

Anne-Marie's : [ www.annemariezanzal.com]

🌟 Why Watch This Episode?

If you're a queer person who has been impacted by a conservative faith tradition and feeling the loss of acceptance by your faith community, let this episode inspire you and help you to know that you are inherently lovable and that there is space for you in an affirming church.

🔗 Follow us on social media:

💠 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amzanzal

💠 Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/annemariezanzalcoaching/

💠 Twitter: twitter.com/annemariezanzal

💠LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/annemariezanzalpurposefulempowerment/

You can also tune into this episode of Coming Out & Beyond: LGBTQIA+ Stories on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.

Apple Podcasts: (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/coming-out-beyond-lgbtqia-stories/id1569859569)

Spotify: (https://open.spotify.com/show/27kocr4llm6syHKaeX1x9e)

👉 Don’t forget to like, share, and subscribe for more inspiring stories and advice on navigating life, love, and everything in between!

Buckle up, daters! In this episode of Coming Out & Beyond, we’re diving even deeper into the complexities of dating in the LGBTQIA+ community with Barbara Rowlandson, a seasoned relationship coach and LGBTQIA+ advocate. 🌈❤️

Dating can be both exciting and daunting, especially when you’re navigating life after coming out or rediscovering your authentic self. In this candid conversation, Barbara offers insights, tools, and strategies to help you assess your dating readiness and build meaningful connections that honor your true self.

💡 Topics Covered:

☑️ What you need to consider before starting to date

☑️ The importance of self-acceptance to the dating experience

☑️ Ridding yourself of limiting thoughts about yourself and dating

☑️ Why vulnerability is essential for connection

☑️ Preparing for rejection – an inevitability in dating

🎙️About Barbara Rowlandson:

With years of experience as a relationship coach, Barbara specializes in helping LGBTQIA+ individuals and couples create fulfilling and authentic relationships. Her compassionate approach empowers individuals to embrace their identity and build strong connections.

💬 Join the Conversation:

What does dating readiness mean to you? Share your thoughts, experiences, and questions in the comments below. Let’s foster a supportive community where we can learn from each other.

🔗 Visit our website:

Barbara Rowlandson’s : [ lavenderdating.com]

Anne-Marie's : [ annemariezanzal.com]

🌟 Why Watch This Episode?

Whether you’re new to the dating scene or seeking to improve your approach, this episode provides valuable insights to help you date with confidence, authenticity, and purpose.

🔗 Follow us on social media:

💠 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/amzanzal

💠 Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/annemariezanzalcoaching/

💠 Twitter: twitter.com/annemariezanzal

💠LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/annemariezanzalpurposefulempowerment/

👉 Don’t forget to like, share, and subscribe for more inspiring stories and advice on navigating life, love, and everything in between!

Please download, like & subscribe! You can also tune into this episode of Coming Out & Beyond: LGBTQIA+ Stories on Apple Podcasts and Spotify.

Dating later in life can feel like tricky business! That's why we've asked our in-house dating expert, Barbara Rowlandson, to chat about best practices when stepping out into the dating world after a long hiatus. This episode covers dating while you're still in your heteronormative marriage, assessing your dating readiness, priorities in dating, and much more!

Interested in taking part in Lavender Dating's 2-part dating workshop, Jan 25th & Feb 1st? Visit www.lavenderdating.com or www.annemariezanzal.com for more information and to register.

Another year of podcasts is in the history books! In this first episode of Season 6, host Anne-Marie Zanzal and her fellow coach/producer Barbara Rowlandson review some of their favorite episodes of 2024, and give us a peek into topics that will be covered in 2025. Happy New Year, everyone!